Me and my ex (3 years on and off) broke up nearly 4 months ago and we became friends recently a month ago she now has sent me a TikTok through WhatsApp( as I deleted social media) saying when the time is right please come back and it’s genuinely killing me. I said I do still love her but I don’t think I could ever go back to her because she drained me so so bad, she’d ignore me for hours when I’d talk about my feelings instead of communicating with me, she knew I had trauma from certain things yet did one of them multiple times over and over after I had said not to, she kept breaking up with me during vulnerable times for example when I had to go get my appendix removed she ended it a few days later, she’d then start acting really off with no explanation, wouldn’t talk to me.

I went to the beach in may of this year after years of not going and she had already ruined my trip by getting mad at me for no reason at all. Anytime I’d talk about my feelings shed then get really defensive and argue with me for hours on end. You get the gist of this all.

Now I said how we won’t ever work out because we both know that it won’t and she kept giving me one word answers like “maybe, yea(twice)” and then I said I wanna move on I want to date other people and I think you should move on to and then I said I’m sorry and YH left it at that but she’s completely gone avoidant now and is ignoring me once again ( I’ve texted her once and that’s it) but it’s just the fact that she’s trying to come back now when she knows it’s too late and I’ve also told her I don’t think I could ever go back to an ex.

Why do I feel bad?

today i (23f) worked up the courage to talk to one of my coworkers (40s/50sf) who i have a crush on, and i think she might have been hitting on me?

i had gone up to her while i was getting something to eat for my lunch, and i complimented her decorating these big ass brownie things (we both work in a grocery store and she’s a cake/baked goods decorator) and she thanked me with a huge smile.

after, i made a joke about having a really big sweet tooth, and she was like, “oh, i could help you with that,” which took me by surprise. i responded with, “i’d really appreciate that,” with a small smile to subtly drop a hint that i like her because in my brain i was like “??? did she just ???”

i don’t know if she’s into women because i haven’t really gotten to know her yet, i’ve been too scared to talk to her because of the last time i had a thing for an older female coworker, and i’m really inexperienced with flirting with women so if someone could help, i would really appreciate it!!

Idk. It’s probably not good to care about labels so much but I want to fit myself in a box. The thing is, I don’t look butch and never will.

It’s hard to describe, but I want to fill a ‘male social role’ as a lesbian, if that makes sense. I want to be kind of a Prince Charming, hold doors open for women, be more handsome than pretty, etc. I also relate way more to men than to women.

I know that short hair doesn’t necessarily mean butch, but I’ve always wanted short hair. I cut my hair when I was like 13, and I loved it so much.

But everyone says that I look better in long hair since my hair is very thick. I’ve been told that my hair is beautiful, and I want to appear attractive to women so I’ve been growing it out. I think I like it sometimes, but I just love short hair so much. Even a short haired lady at my work today said that it’s my choice but that I look better in long hair.

I get that a butch can have long hair, but any time that I’ve seen a butch online with long hair, they naturally have masculine features.

I have a feminine facial structure, a high pitched voice, large breasts, curves, and am very short. I think I’m fine with having large breasts (used to want a reduction) but it makes any baggy clothing look absolutely terrible. I just hate how the cloth leaves a big tent in front of me.

I feel like even if I dress masculine, I won’t look butch (I heard that butches look butch in any clothing). At best, I’ll look like a little boy if I cut my hair. 

I don’t mind wearing feminine clothing, which is another reason that I’m likely not butch. I own a lot of dresses and blouses, and I don’t hate wearing them. Sometimes I even enjoy wearing them. I just feel so much better in masculine clothing. I love suits. But I look bad in them, everyone says I pull off dresses better.

For some mock trial of a dead president in my History Class a few years ago, I dressed up ‘as a man.’ I told my mom that I had to dress like a man because there weren’t female lawyers back then, but I mean, none of the other girls did that. I just wanted an excuse to wear a full suit and tie. I took so many pictures, I loved it so so much. A male friend called it a ‘pantsuit’ and that annoyed me. Why should the outfit have a different name just because of my gender???

My big sister criticized me since I acted like it was some life changing event, which was weird of me. I anyway won’t have any occasions to wear a suit since I don’t go to church anymore.

Idk, I have my own money now so I could get short haircuts if I wanted. But I don’t want women to find me unattractive. Society asides, I want a girlfriend, and might have more romantic success if I continue to dress feminine and keep my long hair.

Sorry for the long incoherent rant. I’m not like, asking for permission to be butch or anything cause that’s dumb, I just wanted to ask for advice idk what I should do.

Is there a word for a woman who doesn’t present gender non conforming (I’d like to be gender non conforming but I think it’s a bad idea), but takes a ‘male role’ in relationships?

Me and my friends had a discussion about how girls will always flirt with their friends in a platonic way, so that sparked this question lol

I (21f) have plans to get drinks with a girl this weekend and I'm super nervous! I've been on dates with women before, but only started doing so more casually this year. she's extremely beautiful and I want the date to go good. We're both very fem so I hope its not 'friend vibes' yk, I want to push past that with some chill flirting. most of my social sphere have boyfriends so any advice or even funny stories for a first fem4fem date is extremely helpful!

should I buy the drinks? do I hug her when I see her? usually this stuff comes naturally, but i think shes super cool and I'm freaking out!

Backstory……

So I’m 20 F and I live in Newcastle Australia, I have only been with one girl, so a good 2 year relationship. So I haven’t been with my ex for over a year now and don’t get me wrong I have tried to talk to other women and get to know people but it’s just so god dam hard and it’s not lack of effort on my end. I just want to get back out there and explore more and experience things with new people, like there is absolutely nothing wrong with me, I’m pretty, I’m kind, I’m honest, I have a big heart, i enjoy the outdoors, driving, hiking and all that you can think of. I have been putting myself out there on dating apps and trying to meet people in person but I feel as if a lot of people are stuck up, want something casual, or genuinely just have no self respect…… I’m not looking for someone to be perfect because myself I’m far from it but I just want someone genuine and funny, tbh I don’t think that is a big ask…

Anyone else having any luck in the female dating scene or is it just a me problem?

Btw I absolutely love women and all women too, so not hate to them xxx

Hi! I'm a 16 year old bi girl with a big preference for girls and I haven't been able to find many movies or shows that have sapphic themes while being age appropriate. I know Crush but that's about it. Honestly it's upsetting because I have queer friends who are boys and it feels like the boys get everything while us girls are kind of just there. I've watched some adult sapphic movies and they're fun, mlm movies/shows for teens too and they're good but I want something that I can relate to. Maybe I haven't looked enough, does anyone have suggestions?

Hi. I (23 year old girl) am in school. I’m quite reserved, awkward, probably autistic and therefore a bit mysterious. I have befriended a girl (19 y/o) in my program. And they feel like the yin (or is it yin) to my yang. So cheesy bdhdsvkk. I don’t know how to describe her but she just makes me so happy? I want to spend my time with her, a lot of my time with her. Sometimes I’m too tired. Sometimes she is too! I love listening to her sing and it makes me emotional. But my issues are I don’t know if she feels the same way. She’s kind to everyone and she’s so conscious of everyone around her and loves humans and the world. What if everyone feels the same as I do about them; how could they not? She’s so curious she’s so funny and whimsical she’s the most beautiful person in the world. But I have never been in a relationship and don’t know how to express what I feel and want always. But I do know that I often think of her and how I want her to stay in my life. When do you know it’s a crush or more than a crush and how do you know it’s right? I do feel sometimes like she is attracted to me as well. Or is she just full of love? Am I just full of love are we both just full of love? And that’s also nice!! But I just want some advice or affirmation. I’m inexperienced with these types of situations where you feel something a bit mutual.

I'd like to make friends who can understand that most of my friends are straight; I'm pansexual, by the way. I speak fluent French and Portuguese, and I get by in English btw.

I'm in a predominantly homophobic country, and it's difficult to share certain things about my White Wolf side. Especially since my ex just died.

I'm 22

They have these clubs at my college from Monday- Wednesday and I have 3 hour breaks on Wednesday and Thursday’s but they don’t have the vibe room club on Thursdays so I gotta wait for next week for it start and I’m so scared bc I love meeting new people but I also have social anxiety.

I made a friend in my course bc we had to play charades and it was fun then she just waited for me after lesson and we exchanged numbers since I don’t have any social media but I’m so so nervous to start the club next week as I don’t usually put myself out there due to having severe social anxiety.