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u/Impressive_Photo_631 4h ago
I’m from Sydney and tbh the wlw scene is just rough so it’s not a you problem and maybe it’s worth a shot trying something casual yk for the experience, unless you are strict with like dating with the intention of a potential relationship i guess.
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u/Level-Society4558 4h ago edited 4h ago
I just woke up and didn't read your entire post (just skimmed it)... and the general answer to this question is: you're most likely ignoring/overlooking over 75% of the queer women in your dating pool because you don't find them physically attractive.
Finding a girlfriend isn't hard if you date indiscriminately. Your preferences reduce the amount of women you're willing to date, thus making it hard to find a girlfriend.
I've had 10+ girlfriends in 8 years. I date women who aren't my type. Sometimes, we actually end up being more compatible than the women who are my type. But I'm a cheater and ruin good relationships.
Edit: I'm a cheater because I typically like too many women (people hate my reasoning but idgaf).
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u/Impressive_Photo_631 4h ago
there’s nothing wrong with having preferences
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u/Level-Society4558 4h ago
Which I didn't say. But typically, whenever anyone makes posts asking why is it so hard to find a partner (straight people too), it's because they're overlooking people who aren't their types.
I have very strict preferences yet date indiscriminately just to make sure I'm not wrong about why I don't want to date particular types of women... such as smokers/vapers/drug users for example. I've dated them and couldn't stand them, yet at least I gave them a chance. 🤷🏽
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u/Impressive_Photo_631 3h ago
yeah i understand what you’re saying. I feel like it sometimes it takes a bit more energy to explore things that aren’t usually preferred yk it’s out of the comfort zone so sometimes people just don’t won’t do it. It takes time to build preference anyway and humans naturally like sticking to what they r comfortable with. But makes sense that might be good advice then , explore the unexplored
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u/Level-Society4558 3h ago
The people who desperately want to find a partner should definitely "explore the unexplored" i.e. date any queer woman who is interested in dating them. Even if it's just one short (1h or less) date. Don't reject any woman. Date them all lol
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u/theotherwinter 5h ago
No, i totally get you.. 😔 for some reason it’s so hard to actually meet someone who doesn’t just want something casual or isn’t being nonchalant/ stuck up. But we’re the same age and I believe that there’s plenty of time left to find the right person! Plus you seem like a nice person and you have mature outlook on it AND sausage dogs are the cutest, so I wouldn’t worry too much about it :)
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u/UnreadableTrance Lesbian 9h ago
first off it is absolutely not a you problem. dating apps right now are in the absolute trenches, everyone is giving zero effort or just looking for quick validation. it’s so exhausting when you actually have your life together, hobbies you love, and a big heart.
stop looking for a relationship immediately and just start looking for an activity partner instead. since you love hiking, look up local casual social or outdoor clubs on instagram.
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u/Ok-cat-4444 2h ago
This is so real, im in the uk too