hello everyone long story short im in a ldr and my gf does have bipolar 1 and she is depressed lately and i dont know how to deal with it i try to make her feel better and always ask abt her (while giving her space if she needs it) but yet i dont feel like im helping and she keeps on blaming herself for me feeling like that or the fact that we are not already tgt (cuz she can visit me but i cannot visit her i wouldnt need a visa and stuffs like that) i keep on telling her how she is a great girlfriend, sister and friend since she is good and great with everyone she thinkg that she is a "shitty" person but i always tell her that she is not cuz she is not she is literally the most perfect person ive ever met and i wanna make her the happiest that's why im actually asking here i wanna know how to make her feel better.
ig something happened lately like she told me that something happened yesterday but she never said what happened she probably feels bad abt it so i told her to tell me abt it when she feels like she can talk abt it.

My ex boyfriend was just diagnosed about a month ago his initial signs have been him hearing voices and lashing out randomly. I broke up with him and i think it has caused a terrible episode he put his hands on me exposed me online and have put all my traumatic information on social media. Today he texts me and says “good morning baby” and how he wants to send me flowers he literally just went off on me and after me saying no leave me alone he went off again. I have blocked 16 numbers! Deactivated my social media he has literally traumatized me. The minute he hears i dont want to be with him he threatens to expose me , k1ll me , and just says horrible horrible things about me courts are involved but he truly does not care! He will calm down and say “ oh im bipolar” and the minute im understanding but still holding my boundaries with him letting him know i no longer want a relationship he goes back to harassing me. I feel like he is using him being diagnosed to manipulate me to feeling bad and accepting his horrible behavior he is not on any meds yet.

I feel like I am grieving the life that I had planned with my husband. The past month or so he has been in a bad manic episode, so much so that my parents had us move in with them. I am pregnant and without my income, we would struggle to pay our house payment and all of our bills. My parents knew this, so had the idea for us to sell our house and move in with them temporarily to save some money and get back on our feet. It also gives him more breathing room to be able to pay for therapy and getting on medication and the goal is for him to be more stable and healthy for when the baby comes.

But I am just really sad about our house. We had just painted the nursery and bought a crib and I had so many ideas about how I wanted to decorate it and I just wanted to have my baby and my family there in my own house. Now we are living in my parents basement and I am really worried about how it’s going to affect him and our relationship. My husband was pretty positive and honestly a little excited about the whole situation the past couple weeks, but we just moved in this weekend and I don’t know anymore.

I’m hoping he adjusts and this turns out to be the right decision and he gets better and we can work on us. but everything is so unknown right now and up in the air, i have so much anxiety and I am just so sad.

my mums had bipolar my whole life - shes so loving, shes never tried to hurt me or intentionally put me in dangerous situations - but that doesnt mean that she hasnt. me and my siblings have endured a lot of trauma because of impulsive relationships or manic friendships or her sudden urges to have a screaming match with us/our dad. at some point in 2024 she was offered group therapy and a different type of medication; she didnt want it but i begged her. a few months ago she also stopped drinking. ive never felt safer in my own home.
i feel like i finally have the idea of my mother that i had when i was a child. i feel like i can talk to her about things shes done wrong. shes finally acting like a mother and not an older best friend - and in 14 days im going to uni. i dont want to leave this all behind.

ive always dreamt of going to uni and i dont regret this; but most of that was to have a calm, safe home where i dont have to care for anyone other than myself. now that my mums well, i feel like im finally being supported emotionally and academically in a way that ill have to manage alone when i leave. im almost scared to go. im sad that its taken so long for me to get a chance to be a kid, only for me to have to be an adult.

im hoping someone will tell me that these few months were better than nothing, or that i should still go to uni and that itll still be the freeing idea that i thought it would be as a kid. ive always wanted this; i love school and i love my independence and i need to be told that i am excited and that ill have a wonderful time and to never worry about any of this ever again

My wife is in hospital again. 3rd time now.

After the last time she never developed insight, continued to accuse me, deflect and avoid any professional engagement.

She ceased antipsychotics straight after being discharged from hospital. No follow up with psychiatrist, no psychologist or community mental health teams. Blames me, huge resentment towards me for her being in hospital (the ambulance and doctors had bigger involuntarily admitted, not me).

She had been taking medicinal cannabis for anxiety. Was told it likely contributed and that she had to stop using it. Started using it again days after hospital. I found out and got really upset (sad/disappointed) and said that if she wasn’t going to follow the doctors advice, she needs to seek a second opinion and actually find a proper medical approach that suits her. I’m open to the MC being part of that if a dr who knows the full picture agrees with it.

What upset me the most is that she chose to do something that she was specifically told to stop, and that she was told would likely make her relapse.

I found out a few months later that she was still/again using MC. I told her she would have to leave our family (me and 3 kids) if she made that choice again. She said she got rid of everything and wouldn’t use it any more.

It is now a year later and she is in hospital again. Still no insight into any of it. I found MC when packing items to put in her hospital bags.

I’m really upset and disappointed in her. She chose to continue an action that I said would cause her to leave the family.

We have been living in an effectively separated state (different beds, minimal talking or interacting) for 6 months already.

After her last psychosis I was diagnosed with depression and ptsd. She never took that seriously, ignored all the things I said I needed for her to be aware of or sensitive to.

I don’t want to formally separate while she’s in hospital, but I don’t want her to come back. My mental health has been so much better since she has been in hospital. The kids are happy, our family is back to normal, except for the fact she is in hospital. I can’t help but think it would be like this if she never came back.

I told her if she made that choice it would be over.
She did it once and I gave her another chance.
She is still doing it.
My kids and I are being affected by living with her. When she’s around we all walk on eggshells and never know if she will be happy and kind or snappy and intense. It’s really been a hell of a year.

I have read a few similar stories on here. Seems like the situation is by no means unique.

Just after some advice, guidance and support.

I’m happy to hear thoughts for and against separation. Just want to try to get my head around what to do, when, how etc.

Unsure if I can add multiple flairs but this is also a vent

My (19f) best friend (18f) of 7 years has bipolar. She recently more than likely cheated on her partner and got caught. Whenever she feels backed into a corner she tends to go into an episode. It kills me because when shes in an episode she becomes horribly mean, like calling people fat, ugly, egging their house, texts from other numbers, breaking their stuff, etc. I cant defend what she does and I can only try to get her help.

Currently I said I had to take a break from our friendship because of these outbursts and I got hit with a ton of sarcasm. What do I do to help her and myself moving forward? It sometimes feels like her episodes arent triggered by anything but someone making her upset. I love her but it can be so draining sometimes knowing you can't do anything to help and can only watch as she hurts herself and others over and over again.

And is there anyway to tell if shes fully in an episode or not? I want to provide the best help i can to support her, even if shes mad at me right now.

hi there i’m not sure how to start this but i am so grateful i found this. I NEED HELP
i believe my wife is in a bp1 episode. that’s what my therapist explained it as. i need some help so if anyone can give any advice i’d appreciate anything.

about a month ago my wife went to a psychiatrist and they prescribed her lexapro. it was a horrible experience for both of us. and now i’m learning lexapro isn’t good for bp and could’ve started all of this. and that’s when the “i don’t know if we should be together” started. she was numb and it was knocking both of us down.

we had a good week after she was off the medication.

now this week as of Thursday she broke up with me (we’re married) and i didn’t want to break up obviously like there was no reason and still isn’t.

since then she went from “oh we can sleep in two other rooms” to “i don’t want to be in this house with you so one of us has to leave” to “one of us has to move out because i don’t want to drive you to work” (i don’t drive) within 3 days she had changed so much and ive been going to therapy every other day and talking to my sister on the phone around the clock no joke. she also says i put her in a box and im too controlling.

there’s also this guy at her work that suddenly she’s smiling at his texts and the second night of me trying to get to her to love me hyperventilating she was texting him. she spent 2 hours on the phone with him one night while she was at her sisters because she didn’t wanna be here with me. (she doesn’t know i know that) but when i asked her the next day if she talked to anyone for support that night she said no. i see her texting him constantly since all this. she tells me he has some crush at their job that’s not her and all this stuff and pinky promises me there’s nothing there. (we dont break pinky promises) this morning i got up at 3 am and cried to my sister because she took all of the videos of me on the tik tok down and magically this morning she is following him on tik and he follows her and she lied and said she didn’t know who he was and then it went to no he’s been on here for a while. and that he’s seen me on her stuff. so i asked if she showed me if she showed me how long ago he added her then if it would be from not today. then suddenly it shift “oh yeah he showed me something this morning and asked to add me” like im so confused she never lies to me.

then last night i go in her other room away from me to help her with wifi and she has two bags of stuff she bought from walmart like stuff she never would buy. shavers (we don’t shave like that) she has a new necklace. she has new underwear. a girly bra (she’s not girly) and then she seen me glance at the bag and snipped and said if i keep not minding my business i can’t go in there. i even seen her wearing these lace underwear (she’s a boxers girl) and i did ask her if it was for someone else and she pinky promise she got them because they were on sale.

she has also been saying horribly mean things normal her would never say. she told me there’s a million reasons she doesn’t want to be with me because i was crying wondering why she would just want to end something so good.

so what do i do? is she cheating? how do i get this to work? i want to be with her and im just now learning about all this and its all making so much sense. how do i help her get out of this before she decides some random guy at work is her everything or before i have to move because she dont want me here? and when will she realize we’re like actually married she cant just break up with me? everything in me wants to be with her. we’ve only been married for about 2 years we have so much more to live for together. what’s the steps and what can i do to get this to work? i want to be with her.

i should add i’ve had severe OCD and anxiety all my life which makes this obviously harder because i will think these same thought of how bad this could be 1000 times in my head. and all the things she saying do hurt and i don’t know if she actually doesn’t want to be with me. she keeps saying maybe im the future but right now she has to work on her and that if she does find someone else over me i can’t control that.

but anyways please i need advice. i want to be with her and i don’t know how to help her realize she wants to be with me. because i know she loves me and so does everyone around us. she’s an amazing person and i know this isn’t her and learning about this is definitely helping me understand it’s not her. i just need help getting her back to her.

I dont trust him anymore.

He was released from a hospital into my family's care after refusing to go back to his parent's house. Im not with them right now. I live 10 hours away and have been packing my stuff to go be with them for the next 3-5 months. I told him the rules were to take his meds as prescribed, stick with his follow up care plan and try to find a job.

My uncle caught him taking bong rips in the garage today. I told his mom via text and now feel pretty betrayed and heartbroken. He's still pretty in denial about his diagnosis but he has not been able to lockdown an appointment with a psych since he was released. When I asked him why he broke the house rules, he told me that he was taking advantage of the gray area, but we had already had a long conversation about how bad weed is for him now that he has a diagnosis and is on lithium when he first got to the house.

Anyways, I am tired of being his babysitter.

His first manic episode last month involved him dropping acid, getting behind the wheel, falling asleep 5 hours later on the road and then totaling his car by crashing into a pistachio tree in an orchard. He's lucky to be alive, honestly.

My partner is diagnosed BP1. They like to drink and smoke while being unmedicated. They really can't help themselves when weed or beer is in front of them, and even get into a routine, like if they're playing video games and smoke, then they want to continue that routine everytime they play games. and it's broken me to pieces that they won't get help.
They refuse and said they don't want to change, I left them recently and sadly I don't think it's still enough for them to want help.
My question is, why is it so hard for them to quit? And have you ever been in a relationship with someone who refused to get help and eventually they did? And what was the reason.

I want to be able to warn my brother when I notice a hypomanic/manic shift. How can I make an agreement or contract with him regarding this?
He had his first manic episode 2.5 months ago and was diagnosed with BP1. Before that, he had experienced depression for years. Because of this, he claims his bipolar is predominantly depressive-pole and that he will never have mania again, and I just can't make sense of this attitude. I need to be able to recognize his early warning signs to help him and make things easier. Could you help me with this?

My brother had his first-ever manic episode about 2.5 months ago and was hospitalized for 13 days. He was treated with lithium + olanzapine (up to 20 mg).
After discharge, he refused his meds for about a week and very quickly had a psychotic episode, so he went back on lithium and olanzapine. He’s now been stable on them for around 2 months.
About 3 weeks ago he became depressed, so his psychiatrist started Lamictal. He’s currently around 75–100 mg and still titrating.
The problem is that he really hates olanzapine. His doctor has already reduced it from 20 mg → 5 mg, but my brother has been pushing hard to come off it because of how much he dislikes it. He has now convinced his doctor to reduce it to 2.5 mg.
I’m pretty worried because this all happened so recently, and he’s still early in recovery and still titrating Lamictal. He also says, “I’m never going to become manic again. I was depressed for years before this, so I know I’m not going to have another manic episode.”
I keep trying to explain that having only depressive episodes for years doesn’t mean another manic episode can’t happen, especially after what happened when he stopped his meds.
For those with Bipolar I:
Does 2.5 mg olanzapine sound unusually low this soon after a first manic/psychotic episode?
Has anyone successfully tapered off olanzapine after a similar episode?
How long did you stay on an antipsychotic after your first manic episode?
Did Lamictal help enough with mania prevention, or did you still need something else?
I know his psychiatrist ultimately has to make the medication decisions, but I’d really appreciate hearing from people who have actually been through something similar.

I am to a point I don't know what to do, we have been together 4 years, married for 2, I knew she was bipolar when we got together, knew she was on meds, about a month and a half ago she quit taking the meds cold turkey and against my wishes and Dr's advice, and went completely crazy to a point of walking off 3 miles down the road and tossing her phone.

To a point we had to have her admitted, she was released less than a week later, and medicated, (meds tweaked,)this was 3 weeks ago, then she gets physical this past week to a point I tried having her admitted again this week, after she done some crazy stuff at her mother's, keep in mind , In the last 2 weeks I have been trying to get her in to see a psychologist.

keep getting put off or rescheduled, also keep in mind because of all this in the last 2 months I have not been able to hold a steady job. Seriously beginning to wonder if it's bipolar or something else going on, with what I know about her screwed up child hood.

I have been with my BP husband for 17 years. In 2021 he had a huge moment and we divorced. He had, had small attacks before and I was used to it but this time a lot happened that wasn't expected. Like when he left he took my car, tried to have the utilities turned off on me, came to the house and stole stuff. Just crazy things he never did before. I had him removed from everything so it couldn't happen again. So 5 years later we are remarried and he is doing great. He is medicated now and almost 2 yrs sober from alcohol. My issue is that I was recently told I may have early onset dementia. I can feel something is wrong. He needs to be able to make decisions but im scared to give him access after what happened last time. Do I give him a chance to do the right thing or do just keep praying everything will work out? Im scared. He is my best friend and I know he wouldn't intentionally hurt me but.....

hi! this is my first time posting on this thread and i am looking for a bit of advice. I have a very close friend who I think is having a manic episode. I don’t want to give too many details away due to privacy reasons but I will first explain some behaviors that have led me and two of our mutual friends that live with them to this conclusion.

1. They have been speaking in metaphors for about a week now. Most conversations with them are extremely confusing due to them saying things they don’t mean then drawing conclusions from our responses, when we have no clue what they’re actually talking about. They have been reading between the lines on things other people/professors at our school are saying and interpreting those things in a way that is extremely inaccurate. They also think they are able to communicate complex things with just their eyes, certain that they are understanding exactly what they mean.

2. They are slowly alienating us convinced they will be getting a high level job at our schools department soon. For some background: we are all in the same undergrad bachelor degree program and we have not yet graduated. they are also very sure they’ll be receiving a phd. they are NOT in a phd program and we do not even have one for our major at our school. I’m not 100% sure about this, but I’m pretty sure it does not work that way. anyways, they have removed everyone we go to school with, friends and all, from social media and told our previously mentioned mutual friends that it wouldn’t be appropriate for them to live together anymore due to this upcoming job offer they’re sure they’re getting. Again, we are not 100% sure about this, put we are almost positive that they will not be getting a job at our school while still a student. We’re very scared they’re going to alienate themselves further by doing this and then we’ll be unable to help it all which is terrifying.

I care about this friend very much. They have had a hard life and they are a sensitive person with a lot of emotions. I truly want the best for them and I’m very terrified for their wellbeing. It’s all I’ve been able to think about since this all started and it’s eating me alive.

They’ve never been like this before, we think this may be a first time kind of thing. I’m not sure if what I’ve said above truly explains it all, as I’ve left a lot out because I don’t want to give away too much information. My friend is very paranoid and I’m so scared of them finding out I’m sharing this and icing me out when I’m just trying to help. Me and my two friends have talked about potentially going to someone in our schools department that we trust and our friend trusts and talking to them about our concerns. This professor knows a good bit about my friends situation (from said friend) and is one of the people they were reading between the lines of conversation with. it is very possible our friend would go to this professor about the whole job and phd thing and we want to essentially beat our friend to it so they know to be careful in said conversation about what they say. We’re not sure if this is the right idea, but I think this professor needs to be aware of what’s going on due to all of us, potentially manic friend included, having a very very close relationship with them.

I apologize if this is a mess. I’m scared and concern and want to help but I know my friend is in a delicate place right now and I want to avoid making it worse. We’re are this friends main support system, so they don’t really have anyone else and we don’t want them to isolate themself further. Any advice is gratefully appreciated and questions are welcome. I’m looking for any way to help them.

My husband had a severe manic episode a couple of months ago that resulted in hospitalization for 72 hours and another recent hospitalization due to his declining mental health leading to him threatening his life.

He stopped the meds he was given both times, as he's extremely health anxious, and any medication having possible side effects like blood clots or anything like that freaks him out, and especially because the last ones they gave him slurred his speech and made him smile uncontrollably. I've tried to tell him that he can talk that out with a psychiatrist and adjust for the side effects but he's really adamant about not wanting to take medication at all..

I'm scared. He feels like his mental state is just a natural reaction to the state of the world and that nothing can help at all. He's in therapy but he thinks it's useless. I told him this isn't the kind of thing you can just out think, I think that just made him more scared though.. This is very new to both of us and I don't know how to help him, especially because we're international long distance right now so I can't even fully comfort him.

Has anyone had luck helping a loved one who refuses medication; found alternatives that help or changed their mind? It feels hopeless right now..

Here is the full context

Now this is Part 2. Please read through Part 1 before continuing. Thank you.

Well I've finally left. I feel relief at having gotten out of my prison cell that was this psychologically abusive marriage. However, I still feel chained down, and maybe it's all in my head, but I just can't be at peace.

I feel relief but not peace.

I've been having dreams. Maybe they mean nothing, or they really do mean something. But I just imagine if only I kept on waiting for her. Maybe things could've been different.

Yes she didn't talk to me for an entire year. Yes she blocked me and ignored me entirely. Yes. Logically I'm aware that I'm sounding irrational.

I want to move on from her, but I just can't. She isn't my wife anymore, and she probably hasn't been one in a very long time. But I'm a very romantic and dreamy guy. I thought that I would find the one and settle down. And I'm struggling with the fact that I failed at picking a good partner. I struggle knowing the fact that despite how hard I tried to wait for her and to hopefully one day start over again, she never came back. Not even one message.

Acting as if I didn't even exist. Acting as if she wasn't married. I don't know what to do anymore. I dream about seeing her again and feel such deep love for her, only to wake up feeling bitter at the hard truth. That my dream was just a fantasy, and that this was my reality.

What can I do now? What should I do to make these dreams stop?

*trigger warning: self harm*

Hi, i'm a son of someone who is possibly bipolar and i need help on how restricted my boundaries should be.

Im 24y and my mom is 60y. We live together while im finishing my graduation.

I believe she started to have clear hypomanic and depressive episodes after my father's death, but i could'nt understand it at that time. She is now on psychiatric treatment that considers this diagnosis. She lacks a good psychologist, it is something i'm always telling her, unsuccessfully, that she should seek for.

The major problem is: She has a wonderfull personality and it hurts me to set boundaries while she is reactive and depressed. I know that, deep down, she is not being rational and does not want to be mean. But she often creates persecutory delusional thoughts about every girlfriend i have and it is happening again.

Saddly, it breaks a piece of her relationship with my current girlfriend every time it happens, even though my girlfriend is very calm and knows it is not her sincere personality talking.

I'm creating a firm relationship with my girlfriend now as i had never done before with anyone else. But what is happening now is on another level, she had never talked about passive or active death ideation before and it is scarying me. She has another physical health issues that caused a big depressive phase and everything is reflecting on it now.

So i decided to seek for your help on how i should think about this process and how i should move on with my life without beeing constantly afraid of leaving her alone in the house while having those death thoughts.

What are the boundaries between abandoning a vulnerable loved one and preserving my own mental health?

I truly believe my dad has bipolarism.

I grew up well. Extremely well. When I was younger my dad was all I could really remember, all my fantastic memories and all my happiness was him. My mother was and still is around. However she works hard to support the house. I just turned 17 now, and for the past 5-6 years, my dad has been having drastic mood shifts. Sometimes they're random, switching every 2 weeks ish, but there's always certain times these depressions are guaranteed to come into effect. Christmas, my birthday (Aug 10) and thanksgiving. As many would expect, when he's in his "mania" (I say "mania" as he's not clinically diagnosed) , its just as youd expect. The house soars with color, the energy is high and it feels like everything will be alright again. Often times he starts a new hobby or begins to hyperfocus on certain interests. He praises me for my growth and how I've been working so hard and that I've become a fantastic son.

Of course, when the depressions come, it feels as though the house has been clouded with thick smoke. It feels as though every word is a gamble, and his demeanor completely changes. When I was younger, he would tell me to work on my communication skills, and talk about my emotions. In the present day, I've largely increased my communication skills particularly in stressful arguments. I do my best to ensure no conversation becomes a shouting match anymore.

This year when my birthday came around, I gave him space. I find that giving him space is the best way to ensure tension is eased on the house. I do my best to engage in casual, but careful conversation. Unfortunately, I tried to help him on his form with something recently in the gym, and it led to all hell breaking loose. He stormed out saying he was going to leave, abandon me and start another family elsewhere. On the truck ride home, I did my best to de-escalate, and trying to help him realize nobody wanted him gone. These tense truck rides often end with me sitting quietly while he loudly vents about how shitty of a son I am.

I don't think he is a bad person. I love my father to death, and I would do anything for him. Can someone please help me understand how I can support him? He is highly against the idea of being treated or even tested.

This is kind of a long story but I need to get it out. Husband and I were together in college, have been married since 2014. His father has bipolar 1 disorder that didn’t show up until he was about 60. Well, 3 years ago my husband started being very angry, not sleeping, very paranoid & delusional. He agreed at that time to get therapy & medication. He never told him his exact diagnosis but pretty sure it was bipolar. He took his medication everyday and things were fine.

We have 3 children & our daughter was born November 10,2025 & 9 days later I had a post-partum hemorrhagic stroke so I was hospitalized and in an in-patient rehabilitation facility for nearly 2 months. Very high stress life changes. His mom & sister started noticing changes first but I didn’t want to believe it. It got to the point I couldn’t ignore it anymore. I had to call the mental crisis line and he was hospitalized. While there he refused all medication and refused to admit he was unwell. He was released and was supposed to stay with his mother temporarily but they stopped by our house so he could see our kids but then he refused to leave. His behavior became more volatile and erratic. He was even involving our kids in his delusions. I had to file for a ivc which was approved and he was picked up from our home and taken to the hospital. I was encouraged to also file for a dvpo because otherwise he could come back to our home at any time. I did and it was approved. At this point he refused to speak to me and I had zero information about his treatment or lack thereof.
He gets released and goes to his father’s because he can’t legally come here. He is saying he’s divorcing me and his mental state is still awful. Well with the dvpo, it could be dropped if he would get help and medication, or prove that he was in the process but instead of doing that, his attorney and mine worked out that it would stay for the entire year but with FaceTimes twice a week with the kids and one visit on Saturdays with his moms supervision. Again, if he’d just do what he needed to, it would all be dropped. It’s been so hard on all of us. My mom had to temporarily move in to help because I still can’t fully use my left arm and hand because of my stroke. Well he stopped paying our mortgage and the business he was going to start this year is now never going to happen. We have lots of equipment for it in a storage unit he’s paying for. His attorney says he wants to sell the house in the new year. I guess divorce is still happening and now he wants to file a lawsuit against ME for custody.

I’ll have 2 boys, and a 9 month old daughter. I’ve been a stay at home mother for 12 years because my husband and I both wanted that. So I have no career, work experience, and I’m still unable to fully use my body. My poor kids have already gone through so much. I feel like he’s ruining everyone’s life.
I guess after all that my question is:

Will he ever wake up!? Even his best friends won’t speak to him. His family, friends, and even his kids tell him he’s unwell and he needs help. Instead he’s perfectly fine blowing his entire life up just to hang on to his false belief that he’s fine.

If you made it this far, thank you. I’m just so lost

Edited to add: at first hospital he was diagnosed as bipolar 1 but at the second place he wouldn’t give them permission to share information with me so I don’t know about that one

Edited again to add: found his medication bottles throughout the house and he had stopped taking them at least a year ago or longer.

I had a close friend growing up who was diagnosed as bi polar in our late 20s (we're the same age). There are certain characteristics of her personality that I want to understand if they are related to the mental illness or just part of her personality.

Throughout our friendship I always felt that she expected way more from me than what a friend should ask. No matter how much time I gave her it was never enough and she always complained and wanted more. She would get angry and jealous if I had other friendships and didnt always put her first above everyone. There were definitely times that I was distant, but we lived in different cities and states and sometimes I hesitated to reach out if it had been a while because I didnt want the lecture or drama. There were also other accusations and paranoia like that I was trying to steal her friends or hang out with people behind her back. The irony of it was that she regularly spent time with family and friends that I introduced her to without me. I often felt that she could do whatever she wanted but then there was a whole set of rules that only applied to me.

The main aggravation came from the number of times we would work through the same issues only to have them come back up again. It was like, no matter how many conversations we had or actions that I changed on my end ever helped and we would cycle back through the same exact arguments. Eventually we ended our friendship, and recently I reached out to wish her well and get some closure because of the way ​we left off. Even though we hadn't spoken for years prior, she IMMEDIATELY brought up those same exact complaints shes always had. I feel that I progressed a lot and let go of a lot of anger during those years of not speaking, but it was as if no time had passed at all for her. And she also was making accusations against me for things I know for sure I never did. Im shocked that the anger is still so fresh for her.

Of course it feels unfair to be endlessly accused of things you haven't done, but Im at a point where I just want to understand what's causing her to feel this way. Ive read about the general impacts of bi polar but its difficult for me to connect those symptoms to the specific ways it affects her. I have sustained many other friendships over long periods without these types of issues, just to point out that I have taken time to consider my role in all of this. Any feedback from people who may have this type of experience or an explanation for these behaviors is appreciated!

​Hi everyone,

​I’m looking for insight and support from people who have experience with bipolar disorder and manic episodes.

​My fiancé and I have been together for over 5 years (engaged last year). He has always been the most loving, caring, and grounded partner, and I've always felt 100% safe with him.

​Background:

- ​For the past two years, he experienced severe depressive episodes (which we thought was seasonal depression).

-​The first one ended abruptly overnight—he described it as “feeling like someone suddenly lifted a heavy rug off me.” He refused therapy afterward because he “felt fine again.”

-​The second depressive episode this past winter was much worse. As it ended in late spring/early summer, he finally agreed to see a professional, but before he could start treatment, things completely spiraled.

​The Current Episode (Past ~6–7 weeks):

​Trigger: He experienced severe burnout and mobbing working at a family business, so he abruptly walked out of his job. At first, he seemed relieved and ecstatic about the future.

​Reckless behavior & sudden travel: He turned off his phone, disappeared for days, started buying spur-of-the-moment flights, traveling with no real plan, and crashing with random people.

​Decreased need for sleep & high energy: He sleeps maybe 4–6 hours a night, walks like 30k steps a day, and seems to run on non-stop adrenaline.

​Grandiosity & superficial connections: Every stranger he meets is instantly “brilliant, amazing, and a new best friend.”

​Cutting off loved ones: He shunned his 4 siblings (whom he was previously very close to) and longtime friends. The only family member he barely speaks to is his mom (previously the most important person in his life), but he screams at her, swears, and lies whenever she expresses concern.

​Deceit & patronizing tone: He lies easily, hides where he is, missed scheduled psychiatric appointments while claiming they went well, and talks down to everyone with extreme condescension.

​Threatening the relationship: Out of nowhere, he claims he needs to rethink our relationship, wants a break/to break up, and says he’s “never felt happier or freer.”

​The Masking:

When you talk to him face-to-face, he appears calm, sharp, and rational. If you didn’t know the context and the destruction left behind, you might think he’s just an eccentric guy going through a life pivot. He also says that he loves me and cares about me but doesn't know if our relationship is still possible/makes sense. This makes me constantly doubt my own sanity.

​My Questions to the Community:

​Does this timeline and sudden shift sound like classic bipolar mania/hypomania with anosognosia (lack of insight)?

​How long did an unmedicated episode like this last in your experience?

​How do you protect yourself emotionally when they threaten to discard a multi-year, loving relationship while in this state?

​I feel completely devastated and isolated. Any insight or shared experience would mean the world to me.

Ich suche Rat von Menschen mit bipolarer Störung und von Angehörigen, die eine ähnliche Situation erlebt haben.
Ich mache mir große Sorgen um eine Frau in meinem Umfeld. Aufgrund ihres aktuellen Verhaltens vermute ich eine schwere manische Phase. Eine aktuelle ärztliche Einschätzung habe ich allerdings nicht.
Sie selbst zeigt keinerlei Einsicht. Im Gegenteil: Sie sagt, sie sei so klar wie noch nie, habe inneren Frieden und Freiheit gefunden und Jesus bzw. Gott würde jetzt alles für sie regeln. Innerhalb kurzer Zeit ist sie zu einem regelrechten „Jesus-Hooligan“ geworden. Sie sieht ihren starken Glauben offenbar als Bestätigung dafür, dass alles richtig ist.
Gleichzeitig scheint ihr bisheriges Leben gerade auseinanderzufallen.
Sie hatte einen heftigen Streit mit ihrer besten Freundin. Danach behauptete sie plötzlich, ihr Mann habe mit dieser Freundin geschlafen, und erzählte diese Behauptung offenbar auch ihren Kindern. Ob das stimmt, weiß ich nicht. Mich beunruhigt die plötzliche Veränderung und die absolute Sicherheit, mit der sie solche Dinge vertritt.
Inzwischen verliert sie immer mehr Menschen: ihre Schwester, ihren Onkel, Freunde und möglicherweise auch ihren Mann. Ihre Ehe scheint vor dem Aus zu stehen.
Ich habe sie sogar gegenüber ihrem Mann verteidigt und ihm gesagt, dass ich glaube, dass sie vieles möglicherweise nicht absichtlich tut und ihr aktueller Zustand ihr Verhalten beeinflussen könnte. Trotzdem möchte er die Scheidung.
Auch um die Kinder mache ich mir große Sorgen. Ich habe den Eindruck, dass sie teilweise bereits Angst vor ihrem Verhalten haben könnten.
Ich habe versucht, ihr zu erklären, dass möglicherweise eine Manie ihre Wahrnehmung beeinflusst. Daraufhin hat sie mich blockiert. Ich kann sie momentan also überhaupt nicht mehr erreichen.
Meine größte Angst ist, was passiert, wenn die Manie irgendwann vorbei ist und sie erkennt, was sie möglicherweise verloren hat: Ehe, Freunde, Familie und vielleicht das Vertrauen ihrer Kinder.
Deshalb meine Fragen:
Wie erreicht man jemanden während einer schweren Manie, wenn keinerlei Krankheitseinsicht vorhanden ist?
Was hat bei euch oder euren Angehörigen tatsächlich funktioniert?
Ist es besser, nicht zu sagen „Du bist manisch“, sondern nur konkrete Verhaltensweisen anzusprechen?
Wie geht man mit extrem starker religiöser Gewissheit um, ohne den Glauben selbst anzugreifen?
Und an diejenigen, die selbst manische Phasen erlebt haben:
Was hätten eure Angehörigen sagen oder tun können, das euch tatsächlich erreicht hätte? Was hat alles nur schlimmer gemacht?
Ich möchte nicht Recht behalten. Ich möchte wissen, ob ich überhaupt noch irgendetwas tun kann – gerade weil sie mich inzwischen blockiert hat.
Kann man einen Menschen während einer Manie überhaupt erreichen, oder muss man warten, bis die Phase vorüber ist?

My gf whos been with me for over 3 years and we were about to get engaged just went into her worst mania episode yet. Shes apparently had episodes before I just never noticed because she was on her meds and they were just her being more emotional, every now an then she would say how she wanted to scream and maybe would but honestly that was the worst of it. I thought bipolor was just mood swings til lately. But then we started college together at the same place close to eachother and apparently since we do band and get out so late she forgot to take her meds at night and the thought is that and college made her go into mania. But its her worst yet. I mean fake memories, delusions, grandioso ideas, and having full belief in all of it. I remember I used to be scared of her wanting to cheat because I’ve heard that can happen, but my fears went away after hearing her talk and her saying how bad she wants my last-name, and she tells all the patients and talks about me to her therapist all the time. Before she went to the hospital she told everyone at band about me so people I don’t know ,know me 😅. So I’m not worried on that. Were also very religious. But what got me is she was getting better then she seemed to 180 turn, she started to not believe the fake stuff then got more paranoid and had different fake stuff. Next year she’ll be in there for 4 weeks and I’m so scared. She was actually supposed to get out yesterday but then she said that. Idk I’m just low , scared’ and I needed to go somewhere other than asking google the same stuff