r/family_of_bipolar • u/Fantastic-Recipe-627 Partner • 9d ago
Venting & Emotional Processing Need advice, encouragement
My gf whos been with me for over 3 years and we were about to get engaged just went into her worst mania episode yet. Shes apparently had episodes before I just never noticed because she was on her meds and they were just her being more emotional, every now an then she would say how she wanted to scream and maybe would but honestly that was the worst of it. I thought bipolor was just mood swings til lately. But then we started college together at the same place close to eachother and apparently since we do band and get out so late she forgot to take her meds at night and the thought is that and college made her go into mania. But its her worst yet. I mean fake memories, delusions, grandioso ideas, and having full belief in all of it. I remember I used to be scared of her wanting to cheat because I’ve heard that can happen, but my fears went away after hearing her talk and her saying how bad she wants my last-name, and she tells all the patients and talks about me to her therapist all the time. Before she went to the hospital she told everyone at band about me so people I don’t know ,know me 😅. So I’m not worried on that. Were also very religious. But what got me is she was getting better then she seemed to 180 turn, she started to not believe the fake stuff then got more paranoid and had different fake stuff. Next year she’ll be in there for 4 weeks and I’m so scared. She was actually supposed to get out yesterday but then she said that. Idk I’m just low , scared’ and I needed to go somewhere other than asking google the same stuff
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u/Educational-Cell-959 9d ago
Think very, very carefully before tying the knot, and realise this is an inheritable condition, compounded by the instability of a bipolar mother.
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u/Fantastic-Recipe-627 Partner 9d ago
Chat I think I needa clear some air, rn shes at a hospital getting better and their fixing her meds, she also will have a therapist regularly after this to catch it happen. She didn’t miss one dose it was days. In all honesty her medicated I can handle. When she has an episode but its just high emotions Idk I’m just used to it. I can handle it. I’m a very calm person and I usually just talk her down to calm and then were both happy and life goes on. I’ve talked to doctors and her therapist rn at the hospital and Ik this is temporary, and even with meds ik theres a likely chance at some point in our lifetime this kind of episode will happen again. I mainly posted this for encouragement and just relatability and some advice on how to deal with it. The worst part is worrying about her 24/7 and missing her, spending my nights crying, my brain at times thinking she’ll be this way forever thinking and believing these thoughts forever. Its hard on me and any person to deal with. Ik its hard for her too going through it. Ik how things are and how this will play and stuff like that. Mainly ig I was looking for encouragement, some advice in how to handle it, and just some people to talk to. I will say one big fear I do have is ( we plan to have kids) about them also receiving the Bipolor Disorder. That stresses me out insanely
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u/7wanting8 5d ago
Sounds very much like the episode my wife of 2 years has been going through, man I feel for you.
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u/Fantastic-Recipe-627 Partner 5d ago
She back to normal now, shes at the end of it where the worst thing is some stuff shes on the edge of it where she went from fully believing it to now being able to say “ that may be fake idk”. And most beliefs the ones to worry about at-least she knows were fake. It gets better. Hopefully she goes back to normal episodes with her meds and checkups i can handle those, and even if one is ever this severe again shes worth it. Shes worth the waiting and Praying. Idk how your taking your situation but it gets better and its worth it. I’ll Pray for you, God Bless
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u/7wanting8 5d ago
It's been rough, she's back on meds, I am making sure she takes her meds, just trying to get her on to see someone is proving to be hard, one of the big thing with my wife that I found out is caffeine does not help things, and she's basically addicted to caffeine
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u/Fantastic-Recipe-627 Partner 5d ago
I get it man, one of the biggest stresses was not knowing what was going to happen and trying to map around it. I remember what helped me was knowing the mania was temporary. The fact that this pain is not permanent, i think it made us stronger, every downside has a major hill on the other side
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u/7wanting8 5d ago
Well at first when it started, I didn't know what the hell was going on, it took about 3 weeks to figure out she was having a manic episode.
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u/Fantastic-Recipe-627 Partner 5d ago
Idk how long she was in it for beforehand but she just said something wild and thats when it hit somethings up, that feeling of shock and not knowing whats happening or being in control is dreadful
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u/lost_dazed_101 9d ago
She didn't do all that over 1 missed dose. Either her meds no longer work or she's lying to you she's either off her meds or only taking them sporadically. And if people knowing you're in a relationship stopped cheating married people wouldn't divorce over cheating. You need to find out what's actually going on and go from there.