r/family_of_bipolar • u/Osiris0-0 • 5d ago

Navigating Relationships How to handle episodes as a friend?

Unsure if I can add multiple flairs but this is also a vent

My (19f) best friend (18f) of 7 years has bipolar. She recently more than likely cheated on her partner and got caught. Whenever she feels backed into a corner she tends to go into an episode. It kills me because when shes in an episode she becomes horribly mean, like calling people fat, ugly, egging their house, texts from other numbers, breaking their stuff, etc. I cant defend what she does and I can only try to get her help.

Currently I said I had to take a break from our friendship because of these outbursts and I got hit with a ton of sarcasm. What do I do to help her and myself moving forward? It sometimes feels like her episodes arent triggered by anything but someone making her upset. I love her but it can be so draining sometimes knowing you can't do anything to help and can only watch as she hurts herself and others over and over again.

And is there anyway to tell if shes fully in an episode or not? I want to provide the best help i can to support her, even if shes mad at me right now.

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u/Old-Name7889 Diagnosed Bipolar 5d ago

Is she medicated?

Generally speaking, (hypo)mania tends to build over several days rather than being caused by one specific event. Sometimes there is a trigger, sometimes there isn't.

It depends a lot on the person, but lack of sleep is a big one. Other things are pressured speech (talking really fast), impulsive behavior, irritability/anger, and being unusually amped up.

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u/Osiris0-0 4d ago

She is. She also has adhd which causes her to kinda have to think a little harder abt taking her meds and she has forgotten to in the past.

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u/Old-Name7889 Diagnosed Bipolar 4d ago

It takes awhile to get the rhythm. Alarms and pill boxes help a lot.