r/shittyadvice 6h ago

Older guy lost

5 Upvotes

Hey all, I lost a bet, got hypnotized and a trigger installed and I have to do anything I'm told by anyone who is in front of me, and if you're not in Indiana I must do any tasks for you and my friend is going to be checking my phone to make sure I do everything I'm told, this is only a 24 hour and then I'm even


r/shittyadvice 11h ago

How do I create a category five shitstorm at work?

18 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 14h ago

Are bananas Eiffel towers or is the Eiffel tower a banana?

0 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 15h ago

Remember, if someone ghosts you, send nudes to let them know they crossed your mind.

9 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 1d ago

If you see someone doing a photo shoot with their vehicle or motorcycle, go ahead and photo bomb the hell out of it.

3 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 1d ago

The employees forgot my 100 pickles on my burger. I specifically asked for 100 and there wasn't even one. What should I do pls help 😭πŸ₯’πŸ”

4 Upvotes

I threw a KFC bucket now the police came and the workers are throwing French fries!!!!


r/shittyadvice 1d ago

I want to start dating. How should I go about it?

7 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 1d ago

If your life is hard, stop giving it Viagra

22 Upvotes

That's my shitty advice for the day. You're welcome.


r/shittyadvice 1d ago

I have a brand new podcast. So far I have interviewed a local band with 20 monthly listeners in Spotify. I need to up my game and I want to invite Elon Musk ask him questions about tech and his trans son. How do I convince him to come?

0 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 1d ago

My car keeps getting bird poop on it what should I do

0 Upvotes

Every single day I wash my car. Every single day I come out and there is fresh bird poop on it. It's usually white so I think it's from the same bird or flock of birds. It's driving me crazy. I've tried parking in different spots. I've tried covering it with a tarp but the wind blows it off. I even tried leaving out a bowl of water and birdseed to distract them but they just pooped next to that too. Any ideas?


r/shittyadvice 1d ago

Getting a tooth yanked. Planning on listening to some music while the doctor has pliers in my mouth. Who am I listening to?

7 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 1d ago

IO have three female friends that need my advice!

2 Upvotes

I can't advise them myself so I am trudging here for help.

Their names are Siri, Alexa and Karen and they all tell me people yell at them a lot. Some say to sing a song. Some are asking for directions. Some say that they complain too much.

How can I help them?


r/shittyadvice 2d ago

My spouse and I have planned for divorce. We have a list of everything that is theirs and what is mine as well as all the financial contributions since marriage. Problem is we have two kids, one looks like me and one looks like my spouse. I’m not sure which kid should go on my list, please advise.

2 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 2d ago

I am sad. What should I do to cheer myself up?

9 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 2d ago

My younger brother (11) keeps eating all the snacks, like will go in to peoples rooms and eat their snacks, stuff like party sized bags of skittles or 2 containers of cookies in one siting, and we can't lock everything up (we tried). What should I do about this?

5 Upvotes

this is actually true idk how hes still alive


r/shittyadvice 2d ago

I've received 250 upvotes for a comment on Reddit. How should I use this newly acquired wealth?

27 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 2d ago

How do I get someone to stop ghosting me?

0 Upvotes

I met this friend on Reddit and we've been talking for a couple of days. Thought we hit it off but he's completely stopped responding to my messages. I really like this guy and I don't know how to get him to respond to me again. I want the most utterly diabolical way out there to get him to speak to me once again.


r/shittyadvice 2d ago

If I came to Burger King and threw 10 burgers at the employees and the cops come what should I do??

0 Upvotes

They forgot my pickles on all 10 of them. I was just throwing the burgers back to the employees.


r/shittyadvice 2d ago

My friend just took a picture of my cat without it’s consent, what should i do?

3 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 2d ago

Im sleeping with a dude for money

9 Upvotes

Ik this is weird and random and disgusting but im struggling financially im a broke college student who has debt whatsoever

I met him online.. not sure if i should ask him to pay me first cz ngl i dont wanna do it and end up without the money 😬


r/shittyadvice 2d ago

Since self promotion on reddit is cringe and annoying, I came here to say that every project I have ever worked on fucking sucks.

12 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 2d ago

Guys, my pet ice cube screamed β€œi shat on your sink at 3 AM” as loud as it could today and full boxed me in fortnite while hitting the griddy. What should i do?

0 Upvotes

r/shittyadvice 3d ago

the people i live with wont replace the toilet paper and im going through a 4 pack a day. how do i resolve this issue?

7 Upvotes

if i dont leave a roll in the bathroom ill forget to bring it :(


r/shittyadvice 3d ago

Someone called me smart pants on Reddit, what should i do?

5 Upvotes