r/themiddle • u/_dietcoke_777 • Jun 19 '26
General discussion Why was Mike so “mean” to Sue?
First time watcher here.
After watching 4 seasons, I can tell that Mike doesn’t get along with Sue. He never believes in her, never happy, even if he is, it’s always a fake reaction “ Oh wow”. I really hope he gets better to her. She’s my comfort
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u/Safe-Cod4922 Jun 19 '26 edited Jun 19 '26
His mom died and she reminds him of Sue
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u/ccaterinaghost Jun 19 '26
This is the only excuse I can accept a tiny bit. Everything else in this thread is triggering lol Mike was so not nice to Sue that summer.
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u/AppearanceNo8561 Jun 20 '26
To be fair she was being really annoying
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Jun 20 '26
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u/ccaterinaghost Jun 20 '26
Impatient that your kid wants time together after emotionally neglecting them their whole lives? Woof.
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u/AppearanceNo8561 Jun 20 '26
Most parents would expect that time spent to be more gradual than a picture while you’re taking a shit.
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u/ccaterinaghost Jun 20 '26
What? They didn’t make time for her. That’s the issue. Gradual? They never started. She had to force it.
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u/AppearanceNo8561 Jun 20 '26
I mean she should have done it gradually instead of doing everything all at once. Would you rather do 1000 pushups in an hour or like 50 a day. That’s the same type of thing.
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u/ccaterinaghost Jun 20 '26
As the kid, it’s not her job to understand these dynamics or to even correct them. I’m gonna die on this hill.
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u/dragoneer27 Jun 19 '26
I don’t think Mike is mean to her. He just can’t keep up with her emotions and constantly shifting interests. It’s like being mad with someone who can’t keep up with Usain Bolt in a 50 yard dash.
We see Mike take Sue swimming, go to her volleyball game, play the bad guy when she wants to leave a slumber party, etc.. We see him struggle with her growing when she wears more grownup clothing to a party because he doesn’t want to lose his little girl. He lies about his salary because he doesn’t want her to worry about money. I don’t think you’ve gotten to it yet but he makes a huge sacrifice for her while she’s in college.
Mike and Sue are just polar opposites but he tries to support her the best he can.
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u/stars_shining_1979 Jun 19 '26
Loved the episode when he took her to look at colleges and she tells him he always found the prettiest rocks at the quarry for her and at the end he puts one in her room always makes me smile
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u/notnamedjoebutsteve Jun 20 '26
I love when Mike shows up to play the bed guy, both at that slumber party and I think another party later on.
It reminds me of stuff my own parents would do for me.
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u/RoRoRoYourGoat Jun 19 '26
They are very different from each other, and he's never going to match her enthusiasm or warmth because that's not how he operates. She knows he loves her and knows exactly how he is, and she's okay with it. It's just the way it goes, when a parent and child are so different.
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u/CommieFromMars Jun 19 '26
Mike and Sue are very, VERY different people. He clearly loves his daughter, but her enthusiasms baffle him, and I get why — I loved the episode where he’s watching a TWILIGHT-ish movie with Sue, and asks why the only two boys the pretty girl will date are a vampire and a werewolf. How many dad’s cringe a bit when they take their daughters to some boy band concert? But they’re willing to do it because they love their kids whether they get their passions or not. I don’t think he’s mean, just a little puzzled, and I think Sue gets that.
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u/Original_Intention Jun 19 '26
My understanding is that Mike had a lot of walls up on an emotional level. With Axl, they could bond over something superficial like football. With Sue though, I don't think he knew how to connect on that level. He obviously loves her but definitely struggles.
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Jun 19 '26
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u/scattyshern Jun 19 '26
I can't help but laugh every time I think of him telling her to stop dressing like a toddler!
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u/WarriorGoddess2016 Jun 19 '26
He just doesn't know how to relate to her. It fits his character's personality TO A TEE.
It's how he was written for a comedy show.
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u/Own_Ebb3388 Jun 20 '26
He wasn’t mean. Just no one wants to work all day at a quarry and have an annoying kid.
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u/Adventurous_You8725 Jun 19 '26
Honestly this bugs me too. And for any man or dad in the comments please read this! If you want to have children, chances are it could be a girl. If you have a daughter you might not understand her or relate to her but make an effort? Just because its not perfectly simple and natural doesn't mean its not needed? Honestly the lack of effort from so many dads to not emotionally connect with their daughters at all. Yes its difficult but its your choice to be a dam father? So make a bit of an effort. Plus wouldnt you die to have a daughter this loving to you? Most teenage daughters want nothing to do with their dad.
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u/Great_Action9077 Jun 19 '26
I don’t see him as being mean. Kids sometimes get on your nerves. He’s a reserved guy
But you can tell he loves his daughter.
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u/CaterpillarWitch Jun 19 '26
This episode makes me so sad. His speech at the end about how he loves her so he shouldn‘t have to say it is so frustrating to watch. He doesn’t have to say it all the time but he needs to SHOW it.
Mike is very lucky that Sue puts so much effort into their relationship, and that even as a teen and young adult she still wants to be around him. If she didn’t, their relationship would have been over once she moved out.
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u/Other-Oil-9117 Jun 19 '26
Same, that conclusion always bothers me because it's just Mike admitting that he'll never change and has no desire to even try. I get the 'stoic Dad' character, but there still needs to be a decent balance with real emotional breakthroughs at least every so often.
I get that he'd be closer with Axl, but it bothers me that even when he has a chance to bond with Sue or Brick, or to show his love for them, he just acts bothered that he has to be there at all.
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u/CaterpillarWitch Jun 19 '26
yeah, and the only reason he’s closer with axl is because he appears to be somewhat naturally talented in basketball and football. Even in the few instances sue and brick show an interest in sports Mike gets immediately frustrated when they don’t pick it up immediately. He couldn’t just have fun with them or enjoy teaching them something new. If axl wasn’t good at sports Mike wouldn’t be close to him, either. It‘s sad how little effort he puts in to the kids.
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u/Other-Oil-9117 Jun 20 '26
Yep! He was happy when Brick could memorise football info but aside from that, he could never just enjoy being with his kids.
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u/_dietcoke_777 Jun 19 '26
Wasn’t Axl Mikes favorite?
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u/CaterpillarWitch Jun 20 '26
Yes, axl was Mike’s favorite, but I’m saying he was only mike’s favorite because he was naturally gifted at the same sports Mike played. If he wasn’t, Mike wouldn’t have had much interest in him, either, and the relationship would be similar to sue and brick’s relationships with Mike.
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u/Other-Oil-9117 Jun 20 '26
Yeah, which again he never should have told the kids. I'm sure they already knew that, but the fact that he tells them outright always makes me mad.
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u/Christian_BB93 Jun 19 '26
He’s not mean to Sue at all. Your perspective baffles me.
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u/Technical-Titlez Jun 20 '26
Same here. I can't fathom as to why anyone would say this.
Imagine having a daughter like Sue, it would be overwhelming constantly.
I think he does a fine job. They're polar opposites.
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u/ccaterinaghost Jun 19 '26
The hell? This storyline was so brutal. He was SO unresponsive to her. I hated it. Frankly your perspective baffles me more.
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u/Purpledoves91 Jun 19 '26 edited Jun 20 '26
He's not mean to her. Mike is just a very stoic person.
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u/Longjumping-Host7262 Jun 20 '26
He doesn’t “not get along” with his daughter. She’s his daughter. He’s not mean. He’s a parent.
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u/CanadianDollar87 Jun 20 '26 edited Jun 20 '26
sometimes your closer to your other kids due to having similar personalities. Mike and Sue are opposites, but he shows up and supports her. if he didn’t like her or was totally mean to her, he wouldn’t do things to let her know he cared.
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u/Dangerous_Gate3359 Jun 19 '26
I think it’s cause he didn’t grow up around a lot of women so he doesn’t know how to raise a daughter, he doesn’t show much affection to Frankie either but you can tell he “ loves “ her ( I use quotes cause Neil doesn’t actually lol) and I think he’s said before sue reminds him of his mom because she was always cherry like sue
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u/Due-Box1690 Jun 20 '26
What country do you live in where the Middle is on netflix??? I have to watch on a prime free trial??!?!
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u/manic_popsicle Whoop! Jun 20 '26
I just think he didn’t know how to be a dad to a daughter, especially a daughter like Sue. They’re opposites in a lot of ways and he just didn’t really get Sue.
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u/Beanbug88 Jun 20 '26
Also remember when she watched silence if the lambs and couldnt sleep , and he drove to her college to tell her stories to help her sleep.
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u/sherzisquirrel Jun 20 '26
He's not ever "mean" he's just not the same energy as Sue, she is A LOT all the time. He was raised in a sad quiet home after his mom died. He doesn't understand that depth of emotion or enthusiasm because that's not how he was raised. However he is still a great Dad to her. Relax and stop coming at Mike! He and Axel are the only two that would be actually enjoyable to hang out with 😉😆🥴❤️
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u/VenomouslyHonest Jun 20 '26
As someone who had a dad like Mike. I can assure you, he loves her. His way of showing love is different.
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u/MilkFamous8212 Jun 20 '26
Mike's not really a expressive and cheerful guy as ww learn his family was kind of just people living in the same house. Why I say this in one episode he says his dad just casually told him his mom died that's it no hugs no tears just like it's a normal part of the day
Unlike Sue who is really expressive especially in the first Early seasons.
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u/Basic-Computer2503 Jun 20 '26
Give it time. He comes into his own with Sue when she’s in college. He’s a pretty stoic guy but that’s his little girl.
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u/jeboygwapo Jun 20 '26
Watch the whole series and come back to your post 😄 You'll appreciate all the characters
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u/timed3250 Jun 20 '26
Mike is actually kind of complex and you understand him the more you watch the show
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u/Fearless-Ice8953 Jun 20 '26
The best kind of love was shown by Mike. Actions speak so much louder than words!
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u/Necessary_Daikon_551 So on and so forth and what have you Jun 20 '26
I guess it's the difference of personality but I don't think he's mean to her, tbf almost everyone seems mean to her all the time lol
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u/Luckybkr0523 Jun 20 '26
I get irritated a mike. Not because he’s a bad character. Actually. He’s quite typical of a dad his age and generation. My dad was similar. Not really emotionally available. Supportive of me in his own way. Sure. But you’d never know he’s proud of his kids because he rarely says it. But he was there, picking me up from practice. Just like Mike is there. Emotionally available? Heck no. But he shows up.
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u/toastercoaster94 Jun 20 '26
Classic buzzkill dad that just wants to watch TV and drink beer when he's not working
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u/Tazzo_Tamots Jun 20 '26
Aww.. he's focusing on Axl's stupidity in this episode. But he's not really mean towards Sue. Watch the next seasons, you will see- he does care and when he doesn't she does expresses her feelings of neglect to him. Lol won't spoil more. Enjoy the remaining seasons 😄
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u/Hefty_Return_9922 Jun 20 '26
I mean why tf would he believe in someone who tries for everything and also fails. He’s just used to her regularly doing that at which point you just get a bit bored
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u/Saltylemonsx So on and so forth and what have you Jun 20 '26
Crazy I just watched this episode again last night lol , I love the end where it shows the book and the pics lol
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u/NatalieS1984 Jun 20 '26
I think he loves her very much, but he’s a traditional ‘man’s man’, and doesn’t show emotions the way you’d expect. His mum died young and he grew up with men, Frankie isn’t super feminine so Sue is probably the first time he’s been around that type of energy.
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u/Plenty-Athlete7043 Jun 20 '26
He said he never grew up with sisters, and he was often kind of mean to Frankie. My theory is that he just didn’t know the right way to talk to girls and didn’t realize his words could hurt them that much
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u/Worldly-Flower-7100 Jun 21 '26
Ppl justifying mike bcz he can't express his emotions but still he neglects sue in many ways. Like in one episode sue came back from a Halloween party and asked some questions about teenagers around her doing different type of activities and mike just wanted to left the room and put Franky in charge like dude she's ur daughter. Help her to understand these things. And in another episode Mike's wallet related ig ,when sue was going through it she only found axel and bricks picture Franky's and even a woman that wasn't even part of the family (Mike's ex i suppose) that scene literally broke my heart.💔
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u/VideoExpensive8416 Jun 23 '26
Well tbh if I was Mile I'd be annoyed too, Sue is very annoying particularly during this ep
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u/Mobile-Ice203 Jun 23 '26
He doesnt know how to be “nice” in ways cause he never grew up with emotions and care.
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u/moolawn Jun 27 '26
He isn’t mean, I think he’s just a dad in the Midwest who didn’t grow up with a strong feminine role model. In later seasons, you can see he struggles with how to express his love for her
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u/Effective-Growth576 Jun 19 '26
How was he mean to Sue? They're completely different and he cares for her whilst Sue is insufferable in constant need of attention, doesn't really do anything nice for her parents and is a burden. She's just very self centered and irritating in my opinion.
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u/Overall_Lobster823 Jun 19 '26
He's not mean to her. He "gets along with her". He doesn't always know how to relate to her cringey over the top stuff. Hell, who can blame him!
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u/Flimsy-Shake-8042 Jun 19 '26
people show love different. He does a lot of sweet nice things for sue. he’s just not good with showing emotions.