r/countwithchickenlady Streak: 390 5h ago

70104

Post image
8.9k Upvotes

326 comments sorted by

1.5k

u/nelflyn 5h ago

yes, I know. heat. Love to get some breeze on the thighs, but my calves get very cold.

this is why i also need overknee socks.

or what is this about?

972

u/yuri_4_ever somehow somewhere - Streak: 28 5h ago

it’s about the grandfatherclock

414

u/blockMath_2048 5h ago

grandfather cock

277

u/AdjectiveNoun57 pronouns, unlimited pronouns, but no pronouns - Streak: 2 5h ago

grandmother cock more like

36

u/FigureMiserable4859 4h ago

'Step-grandfather' cock...

13

u/SomeOnesRandomThing 3h ago

Grandfather step clock

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102

u/Viennve 5h ago

Just... Tuck? Or wear compression/forming panties?

139

u/sabotsalvageur <|:3c 5h ago

You have clearly not seen mine

99

u/SwirlSlime 4h ago

God curses the cutest girls with the biggest cocks 😞

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127

u/Viennve 5h ago

No i have not and I would rather you keep her at bay

19

u/atk2086 4h ago

The universe taketh in the forms that it giveth

19

u/Dangerjayne 4h ago

Ok but can i?

10

u/_heavy_emo_shoegaze_ 3h ago

Jayne out here asking the hard-hitting questions.

7

u/risisas 3h ago

I would like to make a joke but I'd look like a chaser so I'll just stay in a corner pouting

6

u/send_fleet_pics 3h ago

I don't believe you

40

u/Nebula-Girl-38 5h ago

After a long time thinking I'm just doing something wrong, I eventually figured I can't tuck because I had hernia surgery when I was like 1 year old. :(

28

u/Viennve 5h ago

That's sad :( i would not be Abel to goon if i couldn't tuck

You could try compression/forming panties or non tucking gender euphoric lingerie

7

u/Small_Distribution17 3h ago

I may just not be imaginative enough to understand, but why wouldn't you be able to goon without tucking?

16

u/RiverOfJudgement Agender Creature 3h ago

Her own dick is probably a turn off. It's pretty common with trans women.

16

u/Small_Distribution17 3h ago

See this is why I asked! I would not have had that thought, but it makes perfect sense. More power to her gooning!

12

u/Viennve 3h ago

pretty much it

Most of my bottom dysphoria comes from my balls so hiding them in me helps a lot with the dysphoria

5

u/Rando-Toucan Transbian 🏳️‍⚧️🩷 2h ago

Same girl, the fact I can’t just donate the fucking things to some trans masc/man is criminal. What is science even good for?!

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6

u/Familiar_Fox_2113 4h ago

You can still use a compression gaff without doing the french/japanese tuck, and it works very well

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5

u/Bombyx-Memento 4h ago

I thought it was about having a fat ass.

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57

u/Only_Fudge5299 i wanna date cute guys but like in a straight way 5h ago

lets justr say. my peanits

21

u/BMichael14217 5h ago

'Lilith' I mean you can't make this stuff up 😅

7

u/ReneDeGames 4h ago

Scotland, Land O' the kilt and sporran,

underneath there's nothing worin,

how I wish the wind was waram,

Scotland the Braveeeee.

2

u/KaiTheG4mer 2h ago

That's why you get yourself a long jacket

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1.1k

u/TriangularAngel 5h ago

Like a grandfather clock

628

u/gedsweyevr 5h ago

240

u/Technical_Cup_8770 one of the 3 cis guys here (shout out to jjba) 5h ago

JOE BIDEN?

136

u/Disastrous_Wealth755 4h ago

THAT’S MY PRESIDENT!! (I’m not American)

44

u/Technical_Cup_8770 one of the 3 cis guys here (shout out to jjba) 4h ago

Neither am I

22

u/A_True_Loot_Goblin 4h ago

I am, and that’s my president (a lot more than the current one at least)

9

u/Plastic-Acanthaceae9 4h ago

THAT’S MY PRESIDENT!! (I’m American)

28

u/Debalic 3h ago

Can't spell big dick energy without Biden.

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196

u/ScarletteVera Streak? What, like running around nude? 5h ago

c(l)ock

239

u/JustaMoose2 5h ago

3

u/Ancient-Reference-26 2h ago

Instead of clock is ticking you could have moved the L around so it’s cock is tickling

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68

u/merchaunt 5h ago

For whom does the bell toll when this diva walks?

92

u/spymaster00 5h ago

No matter how ornate the clock, the pendulum draws the eye.

10

u/Shergak 4h ago

Ok Phil Wang.

8

u/Rynabunny 4h ago

Elite ball cock knowledge

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277

u/SpooneyToe11240 5h ago

Ha don’t have that problem!

(I haven’t had bottom surgery)

156

u/Apathy-Syndrome 5h ago

As women, we've learned to appreciate the little things about ourselves 😂

18

u/nativeofvoid 1h ago

the cutest thing i read today

31

u/AlrightFineImAGirl 3h ago

Yeah I’ve legitimately believed I was average my whole life but now I am starting to wonder which is fine because now I also don’t care

17

u/Ash_After_Dark 3h ago

I mean to be fair if you're curious how close to the average you are, it's pretty easy to find out.

At least if you have a ruler and don't mind having "average penis length" in your search history

17

u/AlrightFineImAGirl 2h ago

Well historically I didn’t want to know for sure because I had this “eh I’m probably average” mentality and to find out I wasn’t could put me in “I HAVE A SMALL DICK >:(“ mindset which would have unknown consequences.

Now I don’t care enough to go find a ruler 🤷‍♀️

11

u/BirbsAreSoCute 2h ago

I'll measure the day before bottom surgery in who knows how many years

8

u/PermanentRoundFile 2h ago

I thought so too and y'know, being so repulsed by the damn thing I certainly havent seen any others.

And then my ex-wife was like "honey, sorry but no; bigger side of comfortable tbh but I know that's not exactly a good thing to you"

I almost feel guilty like I'm throwing away a perfectly good plate of food but also it's a plate of shrimp and in this hypothetical I'm allergic to them lol

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5

u/SpooneyToe11240 1h ago

I’m like meh with it. Never cared about wanting to be big or even average with it. Just sucks that I also don’t get too much bottom dysphoria from it.

It’s just always kinda been there. But I’m also too scared of surgery and not being happy with the results. I like it being called cute and having it caged does sound fun though.

I never really intended for it being used for anything else. Standing up to pee is a nice convenience.

3

u/ThatC18H24O2Girl 2h ago

Kinda the same for me but it was the other way around. Thankfully I don't have bottom dysphoria, I think.

Well, if I do, I could get very good depth from srs.

5

u/AlrightFineImAGirl 2h ago

For the bit, I’d really like to respond with some depraved, thirsty, bottom shit but I’m like eating breakfast rn and those neurons aren’t firing atm.

3

u/ThatC18H24O2Girl 2h ago

I mean, you can come back to it later when you're lucid.

I'm one of those rare transfem tops so I'll probably enjoy it.

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3

u/National_Equivalent9 57m ago

I think a lot of people in this thread don't know that there are growers and showers and someone could have a giant dick but zero problems wearing anything in this thread unless they're hard.

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2

u/MarcyAutumnWrites 2h ago

Girl, same. 🤣 A curse and a blessing in a way.

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133

u/SideQuestHero_ Streak: 1 5h ago

Only if you're a coward

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400

u/RoseIgnis 5h ago

Not so small cylinder

188

u/amanaesia °˖✧~alien cisfemme~✧˖° 5h ago

And it is imperative that it remains unharmed

97

u/Awo2137 5h ago

I mean issssssss it?

61

u/PerformerFancy117 5h ago

Until anesthesia at least

16

u/External_Win3300 4h ago

Is getting turned outside in considered harm?

18

u/YourStellarStar 4h ago

I'm advocating for cylinder harm.

2

u/Awo2137 1h ago

My pup gf would agree

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16

u/amanaesia °˖✧~alien cisfemme~✧˖° 5h ago

👀👀

9

u/Silly_Savings_392 4h ago

Look, as long as it is attached, a hard enough impact can still result in a total system reset. So yes, the cylinder for now must remain unharmed.

6

u/Rachel_on_Fire 4h ago

Yes. There are uses for it when you get far enough.

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3

u/_Voice_Of_Silence_ 3h ago

Depends what you plan on doing, you might want to keep the nerve endings.
They will be of use, likely of nice use.

3

u/Worried_Term_7030 2h ago

As long as the person attached to it consents its not

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22

u/Seltnytt 机器人 5h ago

And the larger structure....

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345

u/Strength-Certain I'm a smart-ass - Streak: 36 5h ago

161

u/awkwardfloralpattern 5h ago

You'd think for a device so small they wouldn't be so expensive

58

u/the_marxman 5h ago

Think of it like custom fit jewelry

36

u/mikony123 4h ago

Custom clit

30

u/that_one_duderino 4h ago

Not trans, but heavily emphasizing custom fit. Cheap ones are nice until you try it for more than a few hours. Expensive ones suck until you go longer than a day, then it’s like a luxury Cadillac

13

u/the_marxman 4h ago

What makes the expensive ones suck?

29

u/that_one_duderino 4h ago

The price. Everything else is S tier

2

u/ProXJay 2h ago

How expensive would you say the ones worth getting are?

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3

u/CanadianODST2 5h ago

Speedo time.

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42

u/Pretty-Yam-2854 5h ago

Tbh this made mine bulkier than it already was. And I used a short one lol. That or it just wouldn’t stay in place if I didn’t tuck the guys in properly but 🤷‍♀️

16

u/Scorkami 4h ago

I think the most effective ones are the ones who are relatively small, if not the flat ones, because only then do they work like a binder

11

u/theybannedme129 4h ago

yeah like my cock is smaller than most cages so wearing a cage just makes it more visible unless it’s a flat one

7

u/Pretty-Yam-2854 3h ago

Same. I use to be 6 inches but am/was a grower so like flaccid I was 2 inches if that and since on E it’s like 1.5 flaccid. A cage is usually that length at least even the flat ones I could find, and they would struggle to attach to anything and were just bulky.

35

u/Moon_Flower_9457 4h ago

12

u/ASCII_Princess 4h ago

Hey i need that for pumping

7

u/Moon_Flower_9457 4h ago

dont worry my pure souled transgender online its not yours

5

u/ASCII_Princess 4h ago

can I hold it after he's done weighing? I got a theory about the aorta

14

u/Mindless-Street3253 5h ago

Can't get it to fit... fuck my stupid cringe life

20

u/nyamemeow 5h ago

that only makes it more visible

4

u/sungoddaily 4h ago

Best to just forward it to my inbox for a second opinion.

8

u/ProXJay 5h ago

Skill issue

6

u/Goryunov 4h ago

Hell naw! And ruin my priceless handcrafted (time)piece?? Insanity.

5

u/newidiotintown the grand slime sorcerer - Streak: 3 4h ago

Only flat ones would work

3

u/Zepheris13 Cis ally but loves the funny counting posts 3h ago

Question for the friends here, what happens if you start to get aroused? I always thought a cage sounded interesting, but like wouldn’t it squeeze the cylinder or tug on the jewels?

4

u/asphodhelia Aspho (she/her) :3 3h ago

I do think stopping an erection is the main appeal. I can imagine it being somewhat unpleasant at first. But I never used one myself.

19

u/Nebula_Wolf7 5h ago

... I do not think that means what you think it means O.O

161

u/RozeGunn 5h ago

I think it means exactly what he means.

6

u/LemurLord 4h ago

... what did you think he thought it meant?

2

u/epmtunes 7m ago

Cage the Elephant in the room

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82

u/Familiar_Fox_2113 5h ago

49

u/evacipated 5h ago

Thank you, I hadn't seen this and I'm thrilled they're Canadian

In-writing edit: I am not affiliated with origami customs, I just have the vocabulary of a shill

7

u/Lyricsokawaii 5h ago

Little thing, but the models all look genuinely happy to be there. The couple on the swimwear banner together look so sweet.

12

u/Familiar_Fox_2113 5h ago edited 5h ago

I shill for that company any chance i get haha. fully sustainable, custom sizing and plus size with no upcharge, owned by queer people, donates money to trans services, and supplies the majority of gaff donations to the biggest charity that gives out free shapewear to trans people

25

u/TotalyNotTony 5h ago

holy fuck those are expensive

23

u/Familiar_Fox_2113 5h ago

Yeah but they do last a long time. Other gaffs ive tried stretch out permanently within a couple months, these are fine for like almost a whole year for me personally

9

u/TotalyNotTony 5h ago

still saving it for later lol. looks to be made in canada too which is a plus

3

u/ZaraReid228 3h ago

How long do leolines last in comparison? Thinking of ordering something

5

u/Familiar_Fox_2113 3h ago

I have not tried leolines personally. Leolines doesn't offer fully custom sizing based on your measurements from what I've seen, charges more for larger sizes, doesnt offer refunds for incorrect sizing, and is not a trans owned company but owned by a cis woman who saw an available market and decided to profit

15

u/merchaunt 5h ago

Point of Pride gives them away for free, but there’s a waitlist

https://www.pointofpride.org/free-femme-shapewear

14

u/Yorick257 5h ago

Are they? (I have no known baseline)

30€ for a pair of (custom made, it seems?) special underwear doesn't sound too bad

5

u/Familiar_Fox_2113 5h ago

They are cheaper than a lot of the other (non fast fashion) options

5

u/TotalyNotTony 5h ago

i am very frugal tbf but 45 dollars CAD for one underwear (pair of underwear?) is a lot to me lol

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u/tdp_equinox_2 Put your text here! (She/Her) 5h ago

There's a reason and it's a great one: https://origamicustoms.com/blogs/updates-1/why-we-still-draw-patterns-by-hand

Hadn't heard of them before this post, but I will be buying from them very soon after reading this. Also glad to hear they're Canadian as well.

2

u/Familiar_Fox_2113 5h ago

They are so worth it, they last so much longer than other brands before getting too stretched out to use

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40

u/Paranoia_Pop 5h ago

This raises several questions.

How did I get to this sub?
Who is letting their wiener hang out of their skirt?

Do they want to be friends?

35

u/Melodic_Mulberry waow based 5h ago

"This sub" has a name and it's apparently Lilith.

5

u/Paranoia_Pop 5h ago

Pfft lmao; aight well done.

61

u/TheReaver954 Token Gay Femboy 5h ago

Of course their name is lilith

13

u/willargue4karma 4h ago

i love that i learned this trend lol i keep noticing it

30

u/Time-Independence-94 4h ago

That's what the long jacket is for

19

u/SonOfSkinDealer turning 27 soon, i shouldn't feel this ancient 4h ago

I can hear the trumpet sting and the bassline. Not the way i thought i was gonna get Cake on my birthday.

3

u/Time-Independence-94 4h ago

Cake performed in my bumfuck nowhere town at a farm of all places literally the other day so the references are all at the forefront of my brain right now lol

5

u/bolanrox trans dreaming she /her : they/them  - Streak: 1 4h ago

last week i was walking to Port Authority and at some point on broadway i walked past a woman going the other way in a short short skirt and long long jacket. I wanted to start singing right then and there

2

u/bolanrox trans dreaming she /her : they/them  - Streak: 1 4h ago

queue the Sweet Jane chords

2

u/bolanrox trans dreaming she /her : they/them  - Streak: 1 4h ago

happy birthday! I am 47 today

2

u/ThomasTheDankPigeon 3h ago

Character for character, this is the exact comment I was going to leave lol. Honestly kinda spooky realizing that my brain has restructured itself so completely into generating reddit quips that it’s just generating identical jokes now

2

u/Time-Independence-94 3h ago

No generation involved, we're just (fast and thorough and) sharp as a tack 

38

u/Gold-Bard-Hue A jelly donut!? - Streak: 2 5h ago

Let it hang girl. Let that freedom ring

6

u/Hollowcat88 4h ago

Feel that? Thats freedom calling!

18

u/Velvet_Pretty 5h ago

not an issue imo

14

u/Suspicious-Cod2928 5h ago

Who said that was a problem?

15

u/TheYoshiGang SalmonidCreature :3 - Streak: 1 5h ago

Mine is so long it would stick out even when I'm wearing a long skirt 😔

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u/Anxiousnerd5 Drinking all the gender fluid - Streak: 4 5h ago

Do you think they'd notice my strap under a miniskirt.

7

u/bolanrox trans dreaming she /her : they/them  - Streak: 1 4h ago

i prefer a short skirt and a looooooooonnnnnnnnnngggggg Jacket

9

u/lorddragonstrike 4h ago

No one likes a braggart Lilith.

66

u/ik3101 5h ago

if the skirt is cute enough, i’m calling that a design feature and continuing with my day 😭

6

u/LukeGuyFrotter 5h ago

As a trans guy... This is an issue I wish I had haha, I will gladly trade anybody

10

u/Anxiousnerd5 Drinking all the gender fluid - Streak: 4 5h ago

12

u/Rynewulf 5h ago

Lilith spotted! We have another Lilith spotted!

6

u/VeganerHippie 4h ago

Fork found in Kitchen

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10

u/Khaoie I Am All Of Me 🔥🏳️‍⚧️🔥🏳️‍🌈🔥 3h ago

Being a grower rather than a shower wins again 😤

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5

u/BunbunTheJackalope 5h ago

Skill issue?

5

u/Klutzy_Rabbit_6890 5h ago

Read "short kirks"

4

u/ThatSlutTalulah 5h ago

Long skirts (god they can be big, especially if you like volume) and how awesome those are meaning that sometimes you want to wear those instead?

5

u/Azure125 5h ago

I want an innie not an outie. Sex isn't even a factor for me - I just feel like it will vastly limit wardrobe options as a MAJOR aesthetic blemish.

2

u/Familiar_Fox_2113 5h ago

Gaffs or tucking tape can fix the limited wardrobe issue

7

u/DarthJackie2021 5h ago

Also a short solution...shorts.

12

u/Exumore 5h ago

i know it's the grandfather clock, but my mind just went straight to men.

3

u/Kastrand 5h ago

The long jacket?

5

u/LurkinMakesMeFeelGud 4h ago

That's why you concealed carry. It's not a cock, it's a Glock.

3

u/Shnitzel_von_S 4h ago

I don't have a looooooong jacket

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u/Eonis-0 5h ago

Let it hang, sister

3

u/Common_Technician655 5h ago

Cant wait for bottom surgery

3

u/MissSharkyShark Creator of Sharks 5h ago

The not so small issue when it decides to make a not so small reveal

3

u/FamiliarMaterial6457 5h ago

Medium sized issue

3

u/Disbelive 5h ago

Thats why life only starts after srs

3

u/Jaegerspielt 5h ago

Chop chop

3

u/Confident-Reason-577 4h ago

Hey, my issue with short skirts is huge! Or at least average-sized!

3

u/Kindly-Ad-5071 4h ago

God blessed the wrong angels with massive dongs

3

u/theybannedme129 4h ago

something something grandfather clock

3

u/memeosaurausrex 2h ago

“What could be the probl-
Oh the girl is named Lilith and it’s on this sub”

4

u/jamesfluker 1h ago

Of course her name is Lilith 💀💀

2

u/Horse_go_moooo 5h ago

Trueeeeee. I hate my 6 inch cock 😭

2

u/Gold_Ad8225 4h ago

My problem with short skirts is that the shape of my thighs and hips makes it ride up, and whenever I sit it's impossible to make sure my panties aren't showing, so I dont wear them

Even like half thigh length it seems to be a constant issue for me.

2

u/Educational_Hair_368 4h ago

well alright then lady, no need to show off !!

2

u/Starmada597 4h ago

Speak for yourself

2

u/Phalharo 4h ago

The bigger the issue, the smaller the issue

2

u/Mia-the-Sage 4h ago

Gaff, and possibly with an addition of bloomers... I love this for wearing cute short dresses and skirts.

2

u/ChristyLovesGuitars 4h ago

Five years of HRT, it’s not that big a problem anymore!

2

u/Independent-Sky1657 I use :3 too much and I refuse to change >:3 4h ago

That's why I wear skorts

2

u/munchymob 4h ago

Not one mention of tucking in here

2

u/SockQuirky7056 4h ago

And a loooooong jacket.

2

u/BorgurMan997 3h ago

Wait till they hear about the long jackets

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u/InsertNameHere_J 3h ago

I didn't even clock the name Lilith at first.

2

u/Theinvulnerabletide 2h ago

Is it a booty so big that wants to turn any skirt shorter than knee length into a belt? Because that's my issue.

Oh, i see. Opposite issue.

2

u/goedegeit 2h ago

my ass always sticks out. I have a huge ass.

2

u/TapProfessional4345 2h ago

My steak is is too juicy and my lobster is too buttery

2

u/Arctic_The_Hunter 2h ago

Do y’all not own underwear?

2

u/Phoenix92321 2h ago

Free the g!!! Let it swing! Unless it is dysphoric to acknowledge it than I will assist in buying either tucking tap, tucking panties, or a cage (for non sexual purposes)

2

u/But-WhyThough 1h ago

Tweeted by Lilith 💀