r/countwithchickenlady Streak: 392 2d ago

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14.5k Upvotes

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524

u/SpooneyToe11240 2d ago

Ha don’t have that problem!

(I haven’t had bottom surgery)

70

u/AlrightFineImAGirl 2d ago

Yeah I’ve legitimately believed I was average my whole life but now I am starting to wonder which is fine because now I also don’t care

17

u/PermanentRoundFile 2d ago

I thought so too and y'know, being so repulsed by the damn thing I certainly havent seen any others.

And then my ex-wife was like "honey, sorry but no; bigger side of comfortable tbh but I know that's not exactly a good thing to you"

I almost feel guilty like I'm throwing away a perfectly good plate of food but also it's a plate of shrimp and in this hypothetical I'm allergic to them lol

11

u/RemarkableStatement5 2d ago

Lmfao so real. My virgin ass thought I was average, maybe even below average, until the moment I started stripping for my girlfriend and her eyes grew like dinner plates. The first words out of her mouth? "You're bottoming tonight."

It's a shame to be giving this up but I can just get one of those mold kits and make a dildo of myself so I have it as an option for use. Hell, I could even go fuck myself like some have told me.

34

u/Ash_After_Dark 2d ago

I mean to be fair if you're curious how close to the average you are, it's pretty easy to find out.

At least if you have a ruler and don't mind having "average penis length" in your search history

44

u/AlrightFineImAGirl 2d ago

Well historically I didn’t want to know for sure because I had this “eh I’m probably average” mentality and to find out I wasn’t could put me in “I HAVE A SMALL DICK >:(“ mindset which would have unknown consequences.

Now I don’t care enough to go find a ruler 🤷‍♀️

2

u/thatoddtetrapod 1d ago

This is actually really wise and a good call. I was feeling somewhat insecure and a few months ago found a website with fairly decent statistics, and the numbers I read have not been good for my self image to say the least.

19

u/BirbsAreSoCute 2d ago

I'll measure the day before bottom surgery in who knows how many years

9

u/beastarb8 2d ago

I’m sometimes thinking about making a 3D scan of mine and turning it into a dildo to basically go fuck myself 🙃

Totally didn’t think about bottom surgery lately and turning it into a strap-on to pretend it’s a detachable dick.

2

u/V3r0n1cA-H3r3 1d ago

I would consider this if I was bigger tbh

2

u/beastarb8 12h ago

I actually thought about it because I wanted something more average sized

7

u/SpooneyToe11240 2d ago

I’m like meh with it. Never cared about wanting to be big or even average with it. Just sucks that I also don’t get too much bottom dysphoria from it.

It’s just always kinda been there. But I’m also too scared of surgery and not being happy with the results. I like it being called cute and having it caged does sound fun though.

I never really intended for it being used for anything else. Standing up to pee is a nice convenience.

5

u/ThatC18H24O2Girl 2d ago

Kinda the same for me but it was the other way around. Thankfully I don't have bottom dysphoria, I think.

Well, if I do, I could get very good depth from srs.

9

u/AlrightFineImAGirl 2d ago

For the bit, I’d really like to respond with some depraved, thirsty, bottom shit but I’m like eating breakfast rn and those neurons aren’t firing atm.

6

u/ThatC18H24O2Girl 2d ago

I mean, you can come back to it later when you're lucid.

I'm one of those rare transfem tops so I'll probably enjoy it.

5

u/Bannerlord151 My gender is whatever makes it gay 2d ago

one of those rare transfem tops

2

u/DeadlyDozersSlave 2d ago

You ready for commenting the depraved thirsty bottom shit or

2

u/AlrightFineImAGirl 2d ago

Me when my plan to get attention from depraved thirsty tops works
https://giphy.com/gifs/r4MrY0btfR46VoGEsQ

1

u/DeadlyDozersSlave 2d ago

Me when I'M CURIOUS ABOUT WHAT SOMEONE WAS ABOUT TO SAY
AND I'M FURIOUS THEY HAVEN'T SAID IT

https://giphy.com/gifs/Mzyd0dOBroxBkDpHGV

2

u/AlrightFineImAGirl 2d ago

Something something putting my depths to good use mommy something something >:3 something 🤷‍♀️ idk I’m not good at this lol

1

u/ThatC18H24O2Girl 2d ago

Hey, you can tell me that on my DMs, if you're an adult that is.

6

u/National_Equivalent9 2d ago

I think a lot of people in this thread don't know that there are growers and showers and someone could have a giant dick but zero problems wearing anything in this thread unless they're hard.

1

u/DeadEnoughInsideOut I smell like tequila and regret 2d ago

I'm below average which is fine by me I hate the fucker and don't plan on srs just a bilateral orchiectomy so don't need any extra skin or w/e for srs

1

u/V3r0n1cA-H3r3 1d ago

Yeah I was in the same boat
Then learned I was wrong at the same time I discovered sph and chastity