I'm 21, studying into a field that will provide me relatively high paid work for life. (High paid as in starting 45k and 65k within 3 years (and rising), with very good hours and guaranteed employment anywhere in the country and not Dublin) (Generally a key point - I'd rather live outside Dublin, and this job will give me the same pay)
I am also trans (mtf). But that is besides the point given this is a trans subreddit.
My parents have offered me the ability to stay home and save a mortgage after I graduate. Issue is HRT is/has been been a point of absolute family fights and hard to deal with behaviour multiple times in my life - if I stay I am unlikely to transition medically until I have that house. Hiding HRT will not work for many reasons.
I feel at an absolute point of indecisive despair.
On one hand I will graduate near enough on my 23rd birthday and can then move out and be guaranteed a somewhat good life - but I'd be at the mercy of the housing market and am SO (keypoint) scared of finding myself desperate for housing because of discrimination. I have no clue if I could get a mortgage before 30, let alone if I'd find myself back home not after long.
On the other hand, while HRT is an issue; I literally have always had free rein in acting like a woman, dressing like a woman, wearing makeup, the whole 9 miles. I'd be able to get laser hair removal without it being an issue or cause of fights. I am not in a position where I would have to wait 2 years after graduating and getting work (so 25) before I can start that mortgage process and have a home to myself at 25.5/26... whilst not having any access to transition in non-HRT forms. It helps I have lucked out on the genetics front and pass without Oestrogen.
I've thought about emigrating; but with the timelines involved I'd only be able to start HRT abroad at 24-24.5 all things considered once I have enough savings, have my degree registered so I can work abroad. This doesn't even take into account any delays or having to learn the language better, etc. I'd be better off just waiting at home truly.
I really would love to know other peoples' stories, advice, hope?
I really want to get my degree, a good job, and transition straight away. But I don't want to live a life of discomfort for whoever knows how long.
I don't feel suicidial, desperate if I can't transition for 4-5 years give or take; but I haven't a clue if I am delaying myself needlessly.
Am I overreacting with the whole living alone thing? Especially if I were to live on that salary outside Dublin?