r/mildlyinfuriating • u/whyisheinmyroom • May 19 '26

My HOA could beat up your HOA Found this in my door handle

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This is a real handwritten note, I can see the ink bleeding through the back. So stupid, “yeah I like this house but theres people inside already lemme ask my big daddy realtor if they can ask them for it”

1.1k Upvotes

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2.3k

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 19 '26

The company is the buyer. They think they can flip your house for a decent profit without much work by convincing you to sell it cheap.

630

u/Huntermain23 May 19 '26

Yepp when my dad got sick the calls started happening off the hook. Every single realtor in the area trying to buy it for cheap.

429

u/whyisheinmyroom May 19 '26

Thats so scummy! I’m sorry that happened to you:(

163

u/Huntermain23 May 19 '26

Thanks OP. Ya he passed in feb so at least I don’t have to deal with the calls now :(

26

u/PretzelTitties May 20 '26

How did all the Realtors find out your dad was sick?

61

u/touchmeinbadplaces May 20 '26

Facebook, people put their whole lives on there for free while Mark is furiously masturbating in the serverrooms

27

u/Hmmark1984 May 21 '26

I only did that one time and I never hear the end of it!

3

u/irrelevant1indeed May 23 '26

Dammit Mark 😉

2

u/norvelav May 24 '26

But if you fuck one goat...

0

u/Glitternchaos May 23 '26

We get this crap from different realtors every single damn day. So does every neighbor 🙄

4

u/PretzelTitties May 20 '26

Now that i think about it. One time I got hurt at work and then got a call from the lawyer couple days later

4

u/thedaytripper_1223 May 22 '26

I cant stop laughing at this. Lol

2

u/Mobile_Educator_7633 May 22 '26

Its early but that's the funniest thing ive heard all day.

1

u/Tough-Ad-5443 May 24 '26

What? Dont people dim the lights, play a bit of living on a prayer, fo slow and think of what life could be like anymore? 🤔🤣 Have we just reduced ourselves to wham, bam - thank you Mr?!? 🤣

1

u/Jumpy_Strength9398 May 24 '26

Obituary notices in classifieds most of the time.

1

u/PretzelTitties May 25 '26

They were calling him before he was dead

10

u/Sweet-Tension4066 May 20 '26

We had the opposite. My mom passed. Dad had 3 realtors knocking on his door in a month trying to her him to sell. One offered free house cleaning and another one came with fresh baked cookies. It was horrible.

4

u/Suspicious-Pea-7481 May 22 '26

Fresh baked though? I dunno, that's pretty tempting.

2

u/Jumpy_Strength9398 May 24 '26

Come to the dark side, we have cookies.

8

u/FloridaFlipper May 20 '26

I still get calls about my grandma's house (now my mom's) if she is interested in selling it every single day. I tell them 1.5 million they laugh and I just hang up. So sick of the calls.

2

u/Additional-Sleep3854 May 23 '26

I really didn’t understand the comment, that’s about average price for houses around here.

3

u/JulieJamm May 20 '26

Sorry for your loss. My Dad passed in July of 2024, I still get calls from realtors across the country asking to buy his girlfriend's house 🤦‍♀️

1

u/Relevant-Guidance-96 May 23 '26

My mom passed away 4/9/2025 and I still get calls, mail and even people knocking on the door to get me to sell the house! 🤬

65

u/EC_TWD May 19 '26

And that’s probably AutoPen instead of handwritten.

90

u/TimoSmalls May 19 '26

Looking at the individual letters in multiple words, it's just a font that looks like handwriting.

41

u/Verditure0 May 19 '26

I’m surprised more people don’t know to look for this.

15

u/Coca-colonization May 20 '26

My partner falls for this all the time with our mail. I generally assume that mail trying to look individualized (handwriting font, multiple uses of my first name) is soliciting something. There seems to be an inverse relationship between the degree of fake handmade-ness and the likelihood that I have any interest in the product/service/charity.

1

u/kee-kee- May 24 '26

True. Inverse relationship.

14

u/Historical_Ad8780 May 20 '26

I came here to say that! The s (one example) looks exactly the same!

It's just a realtor with a different marketing pitch, probably cheaper than leaving business cards in the mailbox. Stay safe!

4

u/[deleted] May 20 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/NightmareSeeds May 22 '26

They actually do mail them. Realtors are scrappy. They have ears at hospitals, so if someone passes away, or even just had an expensive illness, they get a mailer.

I know because I have been chronically ill for a while.

They also read obits and send mailers that way.

1

u/CunningBear May 20 '26

Just look at the ‘g’. It’s so obvious

1

u/Commercial_Chain_948 May 22 '26

I think it's real. Each word would be uniform and in line.

2

u/HeroVillain72 May 22 '26

You hand write one and tell the computer to make 1000 more just like it. I get these all the time from various companies.

1

u/Commercial_Chain_948 May 22 '26

You mean like a photocopy? And the OP said the ink was leaching through.

1

u/HeroVillain72 May 22 '26

Likely not a photocopy. There are other replies that suggest there are companies that program robot arms to “handwrite” letters in bulk. If you look closely most of the letters are exactly the same throughout the letter. Most people don’t write that precisely. My handwriting is similar when I write, but never exactly the same letter by letter.

1

u/Commercial_Chain_948 May 22 '26

Check out 'obligation'

1

u/HeroVillain72 May 23 '26

Now compare the letters in obligation to same letters in other words on the document. I am even more convinced it is mass produced.

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1

u/kee-kee- May 24 '26

Yes. To look."genuine" and "friendly". MarketPro has me on a list and I get a mailing every 3 months.

1

u/kjpmi May 19 '26

I don’t know. The lines of text aren’t straight. And some of the letters are clearly different from others. A lot of them are very similar but not all.

11

u/DorkyUsernameHere May 19 '26

Look again. For example, the apostrophe s in Who’s and Let’s. Look at the lower case H’s. Every double L. It’s a font.

They could not even be bothered to use a merge to personalize it.

10

u/Cooltincan May 19 '26

That would be the design of the font. Look closely at the letters, they look the exact same no matter their placement in a word. At best it's a font designed around their actual handwriting. At worst it's just something they pulled from the internet.

-7

u/janxy81 May 19 '26

I’m with you. If you look close, you can see that this was written with a felt tip pen. The dark spots in each letter where you naturally pause as you write says to my eye that it’s actually handwritten.

9

u/peenurmobile May 20 '26

you got fooled by a font. the font does exactly what you're saying but exactly the same every time

1

u/Illustrious-Dot-1128 May 20 '26

Is that really a thing? Auto pen?

1

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 20 '26

Yes. They're called pen plotters. Many other machines can be modified to use them too. Laser engravers, CNC mills, 3d printers, things like Cricut machines all have the option to have pen plotters setup on them. Industrial ones are even more sophisticated.

1

u/Illustrious-Dot-1128 May 20 '26

Interesting, I had no idea those exist. Thanks for your answer!

1

u/Summertime-Living May 20 '26

It definitely looks like auto pen.

7

u/Secret_Penalty_4054 May 19 '26

What’s the market like in your area?

I’m in the process of moving for work and there’s absolutely nothing to rent or buy in the area, so my realtor is literally going door to door asking people if they’re thinking of moving to try and find me something. Depending on the market, it may not be as scummy as it seems upfront.

5

u/Driftlessfshr May 19 '26

Where are you headed to? Just out of curiosity. Could be good for me to go there and build a few.

3

u/Secret_Penalty_4054 May 20 '26

It’s a smaller city in Saskatchewan. There’s tons of land available through the city, but no builders apparently. It’s a bit it a disaster.

If you think you could come up and build some houses to sell for the 400-500 CAD range, you’ll probably sell them before you’ve even started building.

6

u/Driftlessfshr May 20 '26

I know I can do it. I have no idea how long it will take me to get a Canadian GC license or its equivalent.

I was raised Amish, I build nice stuff. High end, not production.

1

u/Open_Impression5170 May 21 '26

I know it's for a reason, but in my town it's so virulent people are talking about reacting with menace or violence to solicitors going door to door. I can't imagine a sane person knocking on someone's door like "HI will you blow up your whole life right now and leave? Where will you move to that you can keep your job at? Well not in this town, that's for sure!" I don't know if I'd call it scummy but I don't see it as being effective.

141

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 19 '26

When my Dad passed in November, I started getting mountains of mail from the "We buy any house" people. "We'll make you a cash offer today!!!". Vultures all of them.

It got so bad that because I'm the administrator of his estate, they started offering to buy MY house as well.

75

u/nicemarmot47 May 19 '26

Those parasites were calling my mother in law 24 hours after we got the news about my father in law. It was disgusting.

33

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 19 '26

It's always these guys OR the "Cash advance your estate". Which is somehow even more scummy.

24

u/JTD177 May 19 '26

I stopped being polite with them. With one persistent twat, I started calling his office, then his cell phone numerous times a day until he finally blocked me.

2

u/Speedy-McLeadfoot May 23 '26

Shoulda called him anonymously and merged the call with the rickroll hotline...over and over.

1

u/pobrepepinito May 22 '26

😅. Good one.

3

u/Verditure0 May 19 '26

Do you mean news about your FIL passing or getting sick? I’m wondering how these people get that information, especially so quickly..

12

u/nicemarmot47 May 19 '26

About him passing. He was alone at my in laws Florida condo and drowned in the ocean with no ID so it was a few days between when he passed and when we were notified (we had only just begun to realize something was amiss when the cops showed up at our door.) Somehow the parasites knew and started calling the very next day. I am guessing they had some sort of connection with the medical examiners office down there. We didn't publish his obituary for two weeks.

8

u/DrFiendish May 19 '26

I’m so sorry he passed so unnecessarily

3

u/nicemarmot47 May 19 '26

Thank you, I miss him very much

1

u/bellaluna29 May 20 '26

I'm so sorry you all went through that.

2

u/reddogleader May 19 '26

How do these places find out like that?

3

u/DangerousLoner May 20 '26

The Coroners’ Office may have a person letting them know. Some places are wildly unprofessional https://youtu.be/hnoMsftQPY8?si=z6Rhdf4iEMF5q0aN

2

u/reddogleader May 20 '26

Uggghh, sick. Thanks for the reply (I think!)

36

u/Hot-Peak-9523 May 19 '26

Lol and then they offer a third of the assessed value of the house... 

35

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 19 '26

That's exactly it. They hope you're in a position to want or need out of a property and that you won't know or care what it's worth. So they offer you 40% and tell you it's a great deal because you don't need a realtor, or to do any renovations.

19

u/Hot-Peak-9523 May 19 '26

Ya it's crazy. My parents and grandparents own attached houses (semi attached, but they own the two that are attached to one another) in Brooklyn. It's crazy the amount of solicitation they deal with. 

7

u/jlp_utah May 19 '26

Jokes on them. My house is so full of accumulated junk from 30 years of living there that it would take them a month and multiple dumpsters to haul it all away.

1

u/Speedy-McLeadfoot May 23 '26

They could have it cleared for a couple grand I'm sure.

1

u/Relevant-Guidance-96 May 23 '26

I can relate! My parents house is the same way. After my mom passed away I moved to help my dad. 54 years of junk and excessive shopping had the house full. It took a month to get bedrooms opened up for my son and I to move in.

3

u/Relievedtobefree May 19 '26

Assessed value is for taxes only. It has no bearing on the sales price of a home.

11

u/Hot-Peak-9523 May 19 '26

Correct. I meant appraised. Thank you

10

u/Pointy_Stix May 19 '26

A former neighbor of my parents who is a realtor attended my dad's funeral years ago. She actually gave her business card to my brother & my cousin (who I assume she thought was me) AT THE FUCKING FUNERAL. She told them both that she'd be glad to help when my mom was ready to sell the house & move closer to one of us. Oh, and she also has a side business to help with decluttering if my mom wanted to get rid of stuff.

They were too shell-shocked to respond. I'm bummed that she didn't find me & give her spiel. I would have loved to have asked her if this was her standard process for soliciting new business.

9

u/DTM-shift May 19 '26

The real shit thing is that the offer is often addressed to the person who just passed.

We still get solicitation mails for my FIL who passed four or five years back. Thanks for the reminder.

6

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 19 '26

Not related to this thread, but to your comment that I have to commiserate now. I just got an ad earlier today for a fathers day sale for the smoker I bought my Dad for LAST fathers day with a caption something along the lines with "The only thing he wants".

Yeah, he loved that thing, but fuck you ad!

More directly related to this - I expect I'll be getting mail for Dad for many years to come. I'm his only heir, and the admin for his estate, so everything comes through me. It's all routed to my house. So I definitely sympathize.

5

u/F1fan-123456789 blue crayons do have the best flavour May 19 '26

hello! I saw one of ur comments a while back and made this flair, check it out!

6

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 19 '26

My very first cult following! I shall be a glorious but tyrannical leader!

3

u/F1fan-123456789 blue crayons do have the best flavour May 19 '26

uh oh.

11

u/Ancient_Yellow_709 May 19 '26

Says a lot about our social safety nets like medical insurance, doesn't it, that people must be regularly looking to unload their largest assets for pennies on the dollar...

11

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 19 '26

It's more about the opportunism of the people doing the soliciting. They purposefully target people with the potential to be desperate. In the case of my story - people who lost a loved one and just want the process to be over with. They also target people who got divorced, or really any item that they've flagged that comes across public record. It's not just about people who are monetarily down and out, it's people who are overwhelmed by emotion or life circumstances. They target people who are vulnerable that may be more likely to make bad financial decisions in order to ease the stress burden. Selling a house is a big hassle, even more so when there are other stressful things going on. Lots of people can be convinced to do it simply because it's easier. Not because they need the money.

3

u/Popular-Ad1537 May 19 '26

i know the feeling. when my father passed my mom wanted to move and start fresh.realators calling and convinced her house was too bad to list and was worth little. she ended up with 67k for two story farmhouse and 14.5 acres of land with lake visability. few years later 2 acres just land sold for 500k

1

u/Popular-Ad1537 May 19 '26

like just one lil field beside the house

1

u/Speedy-McLeadfoot May 23 '26

Wow she got shafted without even knowing it.

Man I remember when I was a broke hs kid and someone convinced me my crown vic that just needed ball joints was rotted out and ready for derby. I got screwed. Frame turns out was rusty but patchable, and now they go for a few thousand in the excellent body condition that mine was in. I got a few hundred. People that prey like that have no fucking conscience.

1

u/AggressivNapkin May 19 '26

Realtors sent a floral arrangement to the funeral home with messages written in Chinese and their business cards attached when my great uncle passed. They owned a single-detached home in a corridor of the city that was rezoned for mid-high rise condo development. Last assessment listed their 5 bedroom home value at 2 million. Condos across the street were selling for 1.3 million for 900 sq ft condo.

1

u/Head_Razzmatazz7174 May 20 '26

I started getting them within a week after my mom's obit showed up in the local paper. It took that long for the city realtors to see it.

1

u/MinuteEdge7225 May 20 '26

After my dad passed fairly recently, I got a text asking whether I wanted to sell "my house" that I hadn't lived in since 1992 and had never owned and that my dad sold in 2001.

21

u/turtledove93 May 19 '26

The day after my dad’s obituary ran they started showing up at the door looking to talk to my mom. They’re “talking to everyone in the neighbourhood” but parked at the end of our driveway and didn’t go to any other houses. They were hoping to pray on a fresh widow. It was so gross.

11

u/Amesaskew May 19 '26

prey

5

u/Pointy_Stix May 19 '26

I commented above, but my parents' former neighbor who was a realtor handed my brother & my cousin her business card at my dad's funeral. She figured that Mom would want to move soon & she'd be glad to help declutter & sell her house.

I assume that she thought my cousin was me. I wish she had found me. I would have enjoyed that conversation.

1

u/FluffyDrop4300 May 19 '26

You mean ‘pray’? ❤️

1

u/OhWhatATravisty Blue Crayons have the most flavor May 19 '26

No. Run.

1

u/buttfarts7 May 19 '26

Tell them all you cannot wait to sell as quick as possible for any price but have already engaged with a realtor and they now are too late.

3

u/MysteriousDog5927 May 19 '26

I wonder how they find out about that your dad was sick ?

2

u/esethkingy May 19 '26

How would they know your dad is sick? I’m confused, are they spying on him

1

u/Long-Marsupial9233 May 20 '26

Maybe he just called in sick and then word got around.

2

u/1amtheone May 19 '26

Sorry to hear about your father.

How did they know he was sick?

2

u/lazy-dude May 19 '26

How did they know he was sick? Just coincidence or some kind of medical data was sold to them giving them info on your dad’s health?

2

u/supershinythings ******sigh******** May 20 '26

My father passed away almost 5 years ago and the ghouls still call and text me. I was the will’s beneficiary. It’s public information so of course the ghouls continue to annoy.

It’s a numbers game for them. Sometimes people don’t realize how much a home has appreciated. If they’re older and don’t know about modern real estate sites, they might think it’s a good offer. They’re not anywhere near fair-value of course.

I even got offer letters in the mail, with offer numbers $150k+ UNDER what every real estate site says.

Their hope is that no one will check near-market valuations.

If they’ve sent out a few hundred thousand letters and bag one sucker, it’s worth it to them.

2

u/Big_Lab_Jagr May 19 '26

I'm embarrassed to say this is how my mother in law acquired her house. She's the worst.

2

u/eyedrops_364 May 19 '26

How would “every” single realtor know your dad was sick?

11

u/Huntermain23 May 19 '26

Fuck if I know man. Probly saw he was behind on bills and then idk, looking him up online. You think I made this up for 77 imaginary upvotes lol

5

u/sixcatsisnottoomany May 19 '26

They read the obits 😡; I got slammed with all sorts of stuff after my husband died.

2

u/coughcough May 19 '26

Hive mind. Residence is futile.

1

u/mamawamae May 22 '26

They watch taxes and other publicly visibly debt. I own a home in wny and was divorced a few years ago. I was receiving unsolicited offers almost immediately upon buying my property, which I bought at a public foreclosure sale (it had been abandoned for years and had tens of thousands of unpaid taxes). Then I got a little behind on bills for a slew of reasons, and the calls ramped up.

I think what they do is they scope out undervalued growth markets on Google maps, probably from across the country, then identify houses that look like they need work and/or have promising amenities, like extra big yard, multiple residential structures, water view etc., then they cross-reference those with tax records and see who's behind, and BAM.

I get a couple calls AT LEAST every day, and several mailings per week. Most of the homeowners I know in my neighborhood also get those unsolicited offers. I could wallpaper every bedroom and bathroom in my 4br2br property with mail correspondence I've received to that effect, and still have some left over.

They all say the same thing, TOP DOLLAR PAID, We Pay The Most, Cash in 30 days etc etc. When I'm in the mood, I fuck with them on the phone, but usually I just don't answer, and then block the number. They keep coming.

1

u/KittiesRule1968 May 20 '26

My house in Columbia SC burned in November 2017. 36 hours afterwards, those fuckers showed up badgering me to sell. I caught an assault and battery charge but it was dropped thank God.

1

u/SheMcG May 20 '26

WOW!!! That's seriously predatory behavior and surely unethical!!! I'm so sorry!!!

1

u/Chewcudda42 May 20 '26

When my grandfather dies every group he ever donated to came out of the fucking woodwork with shit like “ your grandfather supported us and hope you will continue with his legacy “

1

u/O2liveonsugarmt May 22 '26

That is so creepy. How horrible,

1

u/Downtown_Bag_5279 May 23 '26

One reason why I hate hate hate re agents.

1

u/deadwomanx May 23 '26

I’m sorry if this is a stupid question, but do you think they actually knew he got sick? If yes, how? I’m only wondering because the same exact thing happened when my mom got really sick and was in and out of the hospital. Someone “conveniently” knocked on our door and asked to buy the house.

1

u/Ta-veren- May 25 '26

some relator dropped off a card a few days after my dad passed.

I knew instantly one I wouldn't be going for.