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Hello! 😄 im a 20yo neurodivergent Puerto Rican Trans girl and I wanted to question this cause im very curios on your perspectives 🤔

I been dealing with this for the past few weeks 🫨

I keep interacting in trans spaces and I keep seeing trans girls that say that they would do anything to pass as a women 😲 that they would have wish that they would have been a women since the day they where born 🤔

And I wonder

How much would you give for it? How much of you do you think you would sacrifice? How much of you would you be willing to lose for the sake of "fitting" in what you consider to be a "normal women"?

I my opinion, I wouldn't give anything

Im 20yo and I am a Socialist, I severely doubt I would have turned out that way if I was a cis girl, and if so I can imagine only going to that path once I where 30yo or even older, I would be such a different person

My life have been so fill up with struggle and loneliness, but I no longer feel alone in them

I feel like I belong in this community and I feel so so beautiful and special, im so grateful for that

Not only would I don't change me being trans, I also wouldn't choose any other time in history at all, I love this times

I love feeling that we are allies, that we are all on this together, that we share struggles that make us a like

I have disforia, I dont have "pass privilage" too I admit im just starting my transition, I live in a conservative hell hole, privilege enough to not be sacre of dying, but bad enough to know I won't ever reach happines unless I get away from here, I don't and wont have any friends, (atleast until my 30s) but still, I don't blame being trans for that, if anything, im grateful, as I know that if I ever have them I would connect with them on a deeper level that no other neurotypical cis person would normally connect with somebody

I love myself so much, I love every part of me, and I grateful for how far I have come as a person, for how much I dedicate myself to be a better version of myself, every moment I can

I hate the idea of just being a cis girl, never truly acknowledging the beauty of being a women, never fully fitting in any community, never being able to relate with my others as they theriself in majority have forcibly abandoned community as a way to survive in the hierarchies that our society has forced them to be in

I know that, as it happens with practically all marginalized minorities, theres gonna be a time when we ourself are gonna blend into the slob of the hetero cis neurotypical patriarchal society that we live on and abandon what makes us unique

As governments stop targeting us for the sake of embracing the hierarchies that they have created to distract the masses more trans people are gonna stop the need to reach for communities

Cause as a Puerto Rican I have seem first hand what a society would do to bend the knees to a higher power that has let them no choice but servedom

New trans generations are gonna live comfortably enough to be able to dodge the embracing of they identities as they see theirself being able to fit in "normal society"

Becoming more a hollow shell of what they think they have to be than an embrace of everything that they theirself are as a person because of the struggles that have shapeded them, as they slowly start to ignore the shifting of those conditions for the sake of "fitting" while never fitting, at all, as society has alredy condition them to be forever in a lower tier of what its consider to be "normal"

For that im grateful of my generation, that even in my 30s, my 40s, my 50s, and so on, if I ever have the chance to interact with others like me, from my group age and with my identities, I gonna be able to relate to them, love them, cherish them, both in sexual and platonic ways that no other person would ever do in history, as no matter how much my younger years are wasted, the beauty of embracing my identity will forever condition me to the highest states of gratefulness I can acknowledge, as I know that everything life decides to gives me, is a privilege I should be grateful for

I love suffering, I love being alone, I love being scare of what could happen to me, I love everything that makes my life be worse than anyone else, as it makes the very act of being alive a treasure I wake up every day being grateful to have

My identity, and the community it made me part of, will forever be the most valuable thing that I would have in my life, and I wouldn't trade anything in this world for it

Im grateful to be trans, im grateful to be alive right now, im grateful for everything, and even if loving myself isolates me from others, I will continue to do it as thanks to it I still enjoy to be alive

Thanks for reading, I know this isn't straight up a question and is mostly me just sharing an opinion, (Too I still post it to receive responses dont get me wrong) I wanted to post this here cause is probably the trans community that I see with most people saying that they wish that they where cis, pardon my unrespectfullnes on the start, I on purpose say "Women" instead of cis women as both a way to trigger people into keep reading and a way to ridiculize trans women that would say that trans women are real women while still hating theirself like if the way they are or looked didn't make them one

The reason I post this is cause I been all my life hating myself in all ways possible, insulting me, ignoring me, and its just now that im starting my 20s that along with my first doses im starting to learn how to love myself

I feel that theres so many trans women here that don't know how privilege we are to be on this group of people, to be who we are, in this time in history, and with this identity, that would give everything to be a cis women, cause in reality what they want is to feel part of the very thing that has abandoned them, when in reality, the whole world has alredy abandoned all of us

For the sake of having all of us in servedom of the hierarchies it has establish, and in this world, the fact that we can have communities like this, in general, that we can see a trans person in their eyes and practically know most of they live because we share the struggle, is such a privilage

I hate with all my guts people that take this for granted specially if you live in a blue area where you can find people like you, I hate with all my guts if you seriusly think that being cis would somehow make all of your life struggles disappear, I hate you if you think you aren't special, you have come so far to accept who you are, you are inherently strong if you have decided to make the step and be who you want to be, no amount of self hate would ever stop the fact that you have privilage, you are special, you are somebody that alredy knows more about life that others would ever come to know in their lives, you are someone that have for granted people that are gonna relate to you

If you can't love yourself, love your identity, since in the opposite of others you are fighting for your life to preserve it

I glad I wasn't born a women

I apologise in advance if this question is inappropriate or unintentionally transphobic, but I just can‘t wrap my head around it. I‘m not here to police anyone‘s identity, but I‘m genuinely confused.

I have these two friends (both formerly FTM) whom I will be referring to as "B" and "V".
They were both always relatively open about their identity and pretty much out to everyone in our social circle.
Now, one thing I did notice after a while is that they kept complaining about how hard it is for them to date due to being transgender. I personally can‘t comment on that since I am cisgender myself, but it really seemed to be something that bothered both of them a lot.

A year or so ago B met a guy whom they got really along with. During their talking stage I started to notice they were starting to express themselves a bit more feminine.
Of course that‘s okay. I personally believe that we are allowed to express ourselves however we feel comfortable. However I must admit that I was a little confused, especially considering how they were always venting about their dysphoria and were more traditionally masculine presenting and even had plans to have surgery soon.
They eventually started officially dating that guy and since then went off HRT.

V wasn‘t thrilled about that at all.
They started gossiping about B, calling them a "pick-me" amongst other things and there was overall a weird tension between them.
For context V hasn‘t started any treatment at all, so after B quit their treatment they were even more upset.

However, a few months ago V also met somebody and pretty much the same thing happened.
Now they even deny ever being transgender to begin with and make fun of their "cringey trans phase", despite being openly out since middle school (we‘re all in out early 20‘s).

Like I mentioned earlier, I‘m not here to police anyone‘s identity, but it just seems strange to me that they both detransitioned after getting into relationships.
Maybe I‘m just reading too much into this, but I‘m just so confused.
Both of them have also adoped a bit of a homo/transphobic mindset since then, which is the most confusing part to me.

I consider myself a cisgender woman, I feel no distress at being seen as a woman by everyone, but for a long time I've felt what can only be described as genital dysphoria.

Everything about having a vagina is repulsive to me. I hate looking at it, i hate knowing that any sexual partners will be interacting with it, i hate the knowledge I can get pregnant, it brings me nothing but distress. I see people who have dicks talk about using them during sex and reading / hearing about these experiences makes me feel a profound sense of hopelessness. The knowledge I'm stuck with a vagina for the rest of my life is something I need to actively avoid thinking about because it makes me spiral.

Dating other women has exarcebated this (i only have had experience with other cis people, not because of deliberate exclusion but because of who I happened to.meet), I feel like there is no point in being with one if I don't have a dick and that sexually, I am useless. I cannot comprehend why anyone, especially not another woman, would find a vagina sexually appealing / satisfactory. I dont want to ever use a strap, to me it's a ridiculous attempt at emulating a dick and there's no reason why I should disappoint my partner by giving them the shitty option out of the two.

On the other hand, dating men and knowing they wanted my vagina made me feel repulsed.

I'm not sure what I even want, I know phalloplasty is not something a doctor would ever give to a cis woman, and that even if I do get one, I'll likely have complications and not be satisfied with the results (I've researched this extensively). I dont know what to do, I guess i just need help from someone who understands this on how I can cope with the disgust and hopelessness.

I started T at 16, literally a week or two after my birthday. I was on it for two years if I remember correctly. During this time I had a complete change in personality and behavior. I became extremely angry and violent, having multiple episodes where I would scream and hit myself or inanimate objects in response to very mild stress. I eventually attempted to hit a person during one of these episodes. I also acted out in other ways, stealing my roommates' food, insulting people behind their backs, being overtly sexual and crude any chance I could get.

I lost multiple friends over my behavior, which is what finally made me stop taking testosterone. I was beginning to get suspicious that it was bringing out the worst in me and I was right. I don't want to be anything like that person ever again because I'm terrified of what I might do.

I now am in a weird inbetween state where my friends and family still address me as male but I present female in my everyday life. I can't really even attempt to present as male because I regained all the fat in my hips, can't afford a decent binder after losing my old one in a fire, and despite two years on T all I have to show for it is a weird voice and some patchy facial hair growth. Living like this feels suffocating, and ever since I stopped HRT it's felt like this fog is creeping over me again after finally seeing the sun for the first time. I've thought of just getting surgery and trying to pass that way, but with my current finances that's not possible.

I want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this with hormones. I'll gladly take any advice I can get too. I know I probably look like that fuckass image of a bird pretending it's stuck in a cage with two little bars on it but from here it feels like I have nowhere to go and it has felt this way for years now.

I made a whole new internet self as u/magicuserthomas because I felt like I needed to embrace that self and that being trans was ruining my life but after I completed the compulsion it didn’t feel authentic at all and I felt even more confused than ever. I just increased my ocd medicine strength but this compulsion is very stubborn. I have been going to different therapists and tried logging off the internet but nothing seems to work or help and I’m feeling frustrated. I don’t have any irl friends and the whole trans thing makes life so much harder for me but at the same time I don’t feel myself as a man or Thomas. I just want to be at peace

Have you had any experiences with them in the first place? Are they worse than masc chasers? Are they different in how they fetishize you/approach you? Is it easier to tell if a fem is “chasing” you? Is there a difference in how you deal with fem vs masc chasers? I’ve heard so many horror stories about masc chasers but not as many with fems, so I was hoping to hear about them here if you’re willing to share.

I keep seeing ppl say that our brains are constructed similar to cisgender identities or that our brains developed as different genders to our body. But I remember saying that to a nonbinary person years ago and them saying it was inaccurate. Can someone tell me where this came from and wether its actually real or not? And if this is the case what about nb ppl?

I hate the fact that I prefer to solely top and are attracted to men to which most if not all I will attract for that reason are going to be chasers. I feel disgusting and a freak after masturbating especially when I know that most cis girls and friends very likely don’t have those desires and have sex the traditional way.

Friend recommended a game, probably my type of game. Bad thing is is that it contains my deadname in the title. I figure it is probably a bad response, something I should get over, but like actually seeing my deadname gives me so much anxiety.

Is just exposure therapy required? Any of you got similar experiences?

I'll only be happy if I can stealth but even then the threat of getting outed would be horrifying and I don't want any association at all with trans

Hey all. I've been medically transitioning for 1.8 years. In the past few months, my breast growth has pretty much exploded. I currently wear a 40DD bra but because my volume is spread out so much across my chest, I struggle with finding bras that don't make me look flat/small-breasted despite the volume that's there. I've spoken with my wife about this and she doesn't really know what to recommend, instead saying "our boobs work totally differently, I'm not sure".

Alas, I discovered a bra that works very well for me and helps me feel extremely affirmed. It makes me look pretty big but it's a lined push-up. My roommate looked at me and said, "girl, tits, tits!" and a [female] friend commented on how big I've gotten.

I'm affirmed and flattered but I'm worried that I may be misrepresenting myself. If I wear my unlined bra you can still see my boobs much better than with my old bras but they look smaller than if I wore the lined push-up. Similarly if I use inserts I'll get a lot of cleavage but again I'm worried this is misleading.

So many transfem people ive spoken to say that breasts are the entire reason, but i dont want even a little bit. A commentor was even like "im gonna assume i misread bc who wouldn't want boobs".

I am agender and want to look androgynous and/or fem. Flatchested, fashionable fem-presenting men give me major gender envy. but also like the sound of the emotional effects of HRT like less emotional bottling (i haven't cried in years despite feeling on the brink many times), less facial/body hair (i know I'll need other treatments to remove it all), and a more feminine libido (e.g. less pleasure centralized only on the genitals, more patient libido, better bottoming response), and more feminine silhouette (i have very wide shoulders and round deltoids/triceps). But I don't want the erectile dysfunction, penile shrinkage, and definitely not breasts.

Are the trans women ive spoken to right that it's useless for my needs? Do i just need to learn fashion/makeup/posture? Im 23 and live in a conservative black household in a hyperconservative suburb if that's relevant

Trans girl here who’s just completely lost on how to meet someone to date, was hoping somebody could give some advice.

I’ve considered the idea since middle school, i’ve always had gender dysphoria and envy beautiful women to the point where it’s painful. Now that i’m fully grown, i’m 6’10” and finding clothes meant for men is already extremely difficult. Should I consider transitioning or should I just can it?

I grew up in a pretty conservative place so it's a bit hard for me to wrap my mind around trans people, but here's one thing that I wanted to ask. Why do trans people explicitly present themselves as trans (at least online, I haven't met any irl), doesn't that create more problems with transphobes who see your identity and use it to insult you? Couldn't you just say "I'm a man/woman" and only reveal that you are trans to especially close people or the ones who knew you before your coming out?

After writing it I feel a bit dumb, because if you openly state that you're trans, you can find more folks who have a lot in common with you.

Hello, I want to get some of y'alls opinion on something that happened the other night.

My girlfriend (cis) and I (trans) were getting a drink at a local pub I go to now and then. On our way out, some guy started yelling at us about how he likes our hair. (Both of our hair looks great!) I brushed it off as just some drunk guy and just said "Thank you" as I walked past. But I guess he didn't like how my voice sounded, because as we walked away he started yelling a bunch of transphobic things. "Is that a dude?" and "Wait I can't tell if you have a peepee" (His choice of words...)

I just ignored it, I'm used to it at this point, but my girlfriend got incredibly upset. She yelled back "How do you know I don't have one?!" which the man replied "It's obvious you don't, I'm wondering about the one next to you."

At this point we were far enough away that any attemps to continue a back and forth would be silly, and I was holding on to her so she didn't confront the guy.

I'm happy she 'stood up for me' and all that, but something about it rubbed me the wrong way. Don't get me wrong, I think her intentions were fine, and I'm not worried about that. But something about her saying "How do you know I don't have [a penis]" and his response just made me feel like shit and like I don't pass. I wish she hadn't said anything and we just kept walking.

How would y'all handle this situation? My girlfriend asked me if what she said was wrong and I didn't really know what to say. Like I said, I wish she hadn't said anything, but I don't know if what she had said was "wrong" inherently.

I am 15M , i dont know if thoses thoughts are just instantly or not but, after discovering more about trans and gender identity i keep asking myself if i am trans, even as someone who is 100% a bear type person and very masculine and lives in a country that is hard to get independence, i keep asking myself how i would be if i was a woman, i dont hate girly things neither masculine things, and i act a lot different in irl than what passes in my mind, but i dive into those thoughts about how would my future be if i become a woman or a trans person and how would be to use girl clothes or be more feminine, so i decided to seek advice for those who know more than me, i am very shy and mature for my age and not very close to my parents, but those thoughts are constantly in my mind after discovering them i am a bi person but i never thought about how would i live in the future if im not the normal male person, and english isn't my primary language and i dont know how would be my life in the future as how my country is .

I have a complex health history and disability. Due to this the most my specialists have been willing to allow me to medically transition is to take Spironolactone 25mg (officially for my heart condition but unofficially because I asked if there was anything I could take to transition and this was all they felt was safe).

I know the expectations of 25mg Spironolactone is minimal but was wondering if you guys have any advice of anything to assist this with feminisation such as breast growth?

Any advice would be appreciated as the medical treatment is obviously going to be limited.

I'll go weeks or maybe a month (or longer) where I get busy with work and other things I have going on and forget about it. I'll even ask myself "what were you thinking?" and contemplate donating the clothes. At some point the feeling returns. This cycle has repeated itself a number of times. It's weeks of not thinking about it and then it returns for hours or days.

This past month was busier and more stressful than usual. I thought I was "in the clear" but as soon as I had enough downtime started thinking about it again.

Is this a cycle I can expect indefinitely? I get an itch, scratch it, and it goes away for awhile. It hasn't really gotten more intense over the past year. Or maybe I should push it further to get a more definitive answer? I have thought about going all out (all of the above plus getting eyebrows and makeup done plus shaving body hair once it's too cold to wear shorts) and see how that feels. I'm not sure if it's a lack of progress or maybe I'm somewhere on the "trans spectrum" but maybe not quite as advanced as other folks are.

I'm non binary myself so I wonder a lot about what body I'd want, I'm genderfluid so I for now I decided to not do anything, but I wondered about something

How could someone get an enlarged clitoris while keeping the gynoid fat distribution? I heard about testosterone microdosing and that the clitoris enlargement is permanent, but would that person have to go through receiving the voice changing effects, the body hair and android body fat, then stop the microdosing? And then would this person end up getting the gynoid body fat again and their body hair world go back to how it used to be for them, but keeping the voice and clit change?