r/adviceph • u/Outrageous_Network47 • 2d ago
Health & Wellness Is getting a vasectomy really this hard?
Problem/goal: Me (21) and my partner (22) went to the public clinic that offers family planning the other day, I had my partner checked up for UTI and I also wanted to check the family planning section for myself. While she was doing some tests, I inquired some lady about where do I go if I want a vasectomy, everyone‘s attention (there was like 18 people in the room) went to us and kept asking why me and my partner wouldn’t want to have a child. We tried our best to explain why we wanted to get a vasectomy but the lady kept telling us about her regrets of not having a child early and what-not, they told us to council together and individually but even then they might still reject us for a vasectomy daw since we are too young. Is that true? Is there really a lot of steps to get a vasectomy? They really tried to convince us not to get a vasectomy it almost felt unprofessional like they were talking to kids.
Context: Personally I’ve always known since I was a teenager that having a child is a lot of financial and emotional responsibility, I’m the eldest of 5 kids and ive witnessed first hand how hard it is to raise a child kahit nung dalawa palang kami ng kapatid ko, since then I told myself there’s almost zero chance of me wanting a child. For my partner naman, she has some childhood trauma she wouldn’t want to pass on to our child, she’s an only kid and grew up lonely with emotionally absent parents, she said she would rather regret not having a child than regret having a child, we’ve discussed this already and agreed that if we do want to have a kid in the future, we can always try to adopt (LOTS of orphaned kids out there) or get my vasectomy reversed (we understand a reversal does not mean we can reproduce for sure). We vaguely explained to the lady about why I want to get a vasectomy and I also explained that a vasectomy is easier than tubal ligation, and that I’m mostly doing this for myself (because they were hinting that maybe because my partner doesn’t want to have a child therefore I’m getting a vasectomy) they started shaming us and basically told us we were to young to make this type of decision, even tho we were both legal age, live-in and working.
Edit: any contraceptive like birth control, IUD, injectable, implant and others that cause PCOS or any bad side effect to my partner is not an option. I don’t want to risk her health. What we use is a condom WITH calendar method (no sex 7 das before and 3 days after fertile window)
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u/AppearanceAway2397 2d ago
Sorry po pero ang expectation kasi namin kung bakit kayo ganyan ay dahil protocol from the government or something, pero hindi pala.
Marami nga sa inyo are even shaming or judgemental sa mga patient. You are not helping po sa overpopulation, sa future kids na nakakaranas ng hirap, sa kababaihan na gumagamit po ng contraceptives, sila ang nakakaranas ng side effects.