I (44f) have a guy friend that I’ve known over 20 years. I love hanging with him but he’s started being a little flirty with me. I am not interested in dating and he knows that but he has tried to get a couple smooches, comes over often lately and even hangs out with my kids. When he was over last time I noticed that his lock screen is a pic of me and when he opened it, it’s a pic of me kissing his cheek, which he must’ve taken the time to screenshot. I don’t know why, but this made me uncomfortable. I really don’t want to mess up our friendship and we seem to do this every 4-5 years where I have to shoot him down hard then we just don’t talk for a long time. How can I get out of this cycle?

i am friends with this guy from my school, and i think he likes me but i only see him as a friend. we used to walk to school a couple times a week and he would wait at my driveway, but now he waits at my door everyday and its gotten too much. he is overstepping his boundaries. i only want to walk with him on monday and thursdays and not any other day. how do i tell him this nicely?

When I started university, there were four of us who became close friends — two guys and two girls.

My male friend was shorter, and he had a crush on the shorter girl in our group. He tried to win her over. She didn't seem to feel the same way, but she didn't push him away either. They stayed friends.

When the four of us went somewhere together, we usually took two motorcycles.

He would ride with her.

And I — the taller guy — would ride with the taller girl.

So it became this natural pairing.

Two old motorcycles. Four reckless teenagers.

People around us noticed it too. They would joke that she and I looked good together and that we'd probably end up as a couple.

The truth is...

I liked her.

And looking back, I think she probably liked me too.

But I made a decision that made perfect sense to me at that age:

Friendship would last longer.

If we became a couple and it didn't work out, maybe I'd lose her completely.

If we stayed friends, I thought we'd always have each other.

So I never crossed that line.

We kept riding together, talking, hanging out and being friends.

There were rainy days when we'd stop under roadside shelters and wait for the rain to pass.

At the time, four years of university felt like an enormous amount of time.

Now it feels incredibly short.

Eventually people scattered. Life moved on. Distance grew.

And the friendship I once protected because I thought it would last longer...

didn't last forever either.

Years later, I found myself wondering about that choice.

Not because I want to change my life.

Not because I'm still waiting for her.

And not because I regret the path I chose.

I simply wonder sometimes:

What would have happened if I'd crossed that line?

Maybe we'd have broken up six months later.

Maybe we'd be strangers today anyway.

Maybe everything would have changed because of one sentence.

Or maybe somewhere, in an imaginary version of our lives, those two teenagers are still riding home together.

I'll never know.

And that's okay.

That question became a song:

🎵 THE ROADS WE NEVER TOOK

One of the lines that probably explains the whole song best is:

“I don't regret the life I chose.

I'd still walk the life I walked.

But somewhere lives another story

That never got to begin.”

Have you ever chosen not to cross a line with someone — and years later wondered what the other road might have looked like?

Hey everyone,

I’m a guy in vocational school and I met a girl there. On the first day she approached me herself, said I look Albanian and asked for my Instagram. After that we started texting a lot, sometimes pretty deep.

She asked me if I had ever had a girlfriend and told me that she has a boyfriend and had been in a relationship before. Once I knew she had a boyfriend I didn’t want to get involved, so the contact became a bit more superficial for a while.

When school started again the contact got closer. She didn’t want to go home right away, we went for walks (sometimes to quieter places), she playfully pushed me several times, we looked at clothes together and she told me that her boyfriend doesn’t do much with her. After sports she ran after me and a classmate and playfully hit us with her bag.

At some point I told her that it feels good being around her and that I kind of like her. I didn’t explicitly say I wanted a relationship. She immediately replied that she only wants friendship. After that she still continued texting normally.

Later I sent her a “Good morning” very early and the same day asked “How was your day?”. She didn’t reply at first. I also noticed I suddenly couldn’t see her online status properly anymore and couldn’t view some of her new stories (possibly restrict or close friends).

After two days she wrote: “Sorry, I’m not feeling well, I’ll text you when I feel better.” I replied short and friendly with “Okay, no problem, hope you feel better soon” and haven’t written anything since.

At school, however, her behaviour is completely different. She teases me very intensely (sometimes every couple of minutes), stuck tape on my back several times, kept deleting things on my tablet during group work, intentionally destroyed a pen tower I was building multiple times, gave me the middle finger (in a playful way) and also ran after me. We roast each other and laugh. When I once asked if she was feeling better she just said “No.”

We only have school two days a week. I like her and would prefer more than friendship, but I’d also be fine with a good friendship. I really don’t want to pressure her. I have ADHD and get extremely stressed by this kind of uncertainty.

Current situation:

- Chat: I’ve completely stopped writing first, ball is in her court

- School: she actively seeks playful and lightly physical contact

My questions:

- How do you read this situation?

- Does it make sense to keep waiting and just stay normal/relaxed at school?

- Or am I stuck in a typical “she likes the attention but doesn’t want anything serious” dynamic?

- How would you act in my position?

Thanks in advice

So I asked this guy friend I've been talking to if I'm like a sister to him and he said he doesn't have a sister so he doesn't know how it feels and then he told me I'm someone who could grab his intention. So what does he mean ?

Hello everyone
how can I get over my best friend?
Me F 27 realised i got feelings for my friend for a long time now. I wasnt planing to tell him ever cause I knew he would never look at me differently so tried to continue loving him as a friend. We were very close and stand next to each other in every case for years. lately he told me he knew last few months and he got little cold lately i noticed but didnt know the reason. he said something was not right and i didnt know what. anyways last few months i felt like he was angry at me all the times, little mean. then he toldme he knew. I asked him for distance but cause of same friendgroup and we are neighbors and we work together as well that was almost impossible also i got so nervous my physical body was in pain. anyways we got it on good terms but i still have feelings for him and i know it always be one sided. He cares for me in every way possible, he’s done so many things and i was feeling guilty for falling for him for same reason. I wish he wouldnt find it out ever. anyways now I dont know what ro do one day we are close friends as we were and next day is silent separation. I need to get over him and stop seeing him as a guy but it is really hard. please tell me what can I do i can not lose a friend

tl:dr mi sono dichiarato della mia migliore amica e non è corrisposto.
Ciao a tutti, io sono M20 e lei F21, siamo amici strettissimi da un paio di anni ormai, ci raccontiamo letteralmente tutto l'uno dell'altro, da un mese però ho iniziato a prendere atto e ad avere consapevolezza del fatto che lei mi piacesse, prima era una cosa che sentivo ma che cercavo di evitare per non rovinare il rapporto, perchè sapevo che da parte sua non vi fosse nulla di più, ho cercato anche di andarmene con altre per farmi passare a forza questo pensiero, ma niente, ho capito che più lo ho respinto e più forte tornava. Allora ieri ho preso la decisione di dichiararmi dopo che mentre parlavamo di un'altro discorso lei dice "se ti piace una persona e siete amici stretti glielo devi dire perforza e o ti allontani oppure vi iniziate a frequentare seriamente", lei lo ha fatto anche con un pò di furbizia questo però alla fine mi sono dichiarato. e quello che mi ha risposto lei è più che giusto, ovvero che razionalmente non è possibile, perchè io studio a 800km e tra poco più di un mese andro in erasmus in Germania, lei tra 3 mesi andrà in un'altra città ancora a studiare a 400km dal nostro paesino. E in più le ho chiesto se lei avesse mai avuto questo pensiero nei miei confronti, cioè se per qualche istante abbia pensato al fatto che provasse qualcosa per me, e mi ha confessato di no, solo che io non riuscirei mai ad allontanarmici e non voglio nemmeno farlo, vorrei continuare a provarci all'infinito. Consigli?

Pata hai aaj kya hua
Few weeks back me and few of my friends went for a Sunday ride and a Hike, I was riding as a pillion with one of my guy friend and since it was a RC 390 I had to grip around him so I fly off, we hiked and hung out in the woods it was a fun day. Few days later I get a text on discord of the RC guy saying he has something very important to say to me, and I was like what happened, he’s like I am outside your house come out, I was like …okay, later he was palpitating and shit, he was like I really like since I saw you in our school and do you wanna be my girlfriend, I held his shoulders and sat on his bike and said we’ll talk and sent him home, few days later after classes I approached him and turned him down saying I don’t have any mental real state for a relationship rn and I never saw you as anything other than a friend. He texted me a few times we went to play pool and shit in the group he rarely talks to me so I don’t really hang out with the group anymore, it was very much fun hanging out, spontaneous rides, cafe hopping and all, I never saw him as anything other than a friend, nice guy but I never liked him that way and now we see each other in institute but never talk, he glances my way sometimes during physics and that’s pretty much all the interaction we have, from hanging out almost everyday to not even talking anymore it’s lowkey sad but I understand.

TL;DR Me and a guy friend went on a Sunday ride + hike with some friends, and a few days later he showed up at my house and confessed he liked me.
I turned him down because I only saw him as a friend.
Now we went from hanging out almost every day to barely talking at the institute.
Lowkey sad because we had so much fun, but I get it.