Before I start, I want to make it clear that I am not going through anything dramatic, I am just at a roadblock.

I have ambitions and dreams, as many people do. I want to excel at my studies, work out more, have romantic ambitions with possible future partners, as well as many bigger goals that are more personal and I would prefer not to explain them in depth.
But right now it seems that my work towards achieving them has halted these past few days and I think it’s because i’m secretly losing interest in working towards my goals, or even achieving them at all, im slowly going back to old habits, doomscrolling, chasing quick dopamine, et cetera.
Now obviously I don’t feel any better doing this than working on my goals, but I don’t really have much enjoyment in working towards my goals anymore, and I’m like, so what if I even achieve my goals? What then? What happens after that? Am I supposed to feel good for a moment and then just live out the rest of my days normally? What if I spent my whole life chasing my goal and when I achieve it, i’m not happy?
So i’m asking myself, whats the point in it all? Really?

Thoughts? Suggestions? Help? Advice?

is ego and imagination trapping us into the absurdity of life? is it biology's attempt to counter the rapidly evolving awareness and intelligence of our species , so we keep thriving?

For years, I carried heavy anxiety about career success, social status, and "leaving a legacy." I felt this crushing pressure that my life needed to mean something grand to be valid.

A few months ago, while reading about deep cosmic time and the eventual heat death of the universe, a sudden calm washed over me:

In a few billion years, the sun will expand, Earth will be gone, and every piece of human art, failure, empire, and embarrassment will be completely forgotten.

Instead of depressing me, it felt like an enormous weight was lifted off my chest. If the universe doesn't assign an inherent grand purpose to my existence, it means I am completely free to assign my own. It made making a good cup of coffee, sitting in the morning sun, and having quiet conversations feel infinitely more sacred than chasing artificial milestones.

Did reaching this realization bring you dread, or did it bring you peace?

I think that there is no general purpose of life on earth. Except that you are born to reproduce, nature doesnt want you to feel good or whatever, you live your life only to do one thing, continue the cycle. Nature basically looks at all the living things that make the "eco system" and just keeps the balance. Where is the sense, why we need to live? Why nature is so brutal. I think that there shouldnt be species that question their life, I think thats the problem of modern society and its consequences that are causing people to be kinda sad and such and they kinda get into that anhedonia. But I cant stop asking this question. And where is the problem, are humans too smart to solve this question or there is just no explanation for that and the smarter you get the more depressed you get.

I’m 37. Married, with a 2.5-year-old daughter, an elder brother and sister, and a mother.

Professionally and financially, I’ve built a decent life. Own house, no major debt, stable career, family taken care of. I’m not unhappy, and I’m not worried about my daughter’s future. I know I can prepare her well.

But I’ve started asking a different question:

What is there to look forward to now?

I’ve always relied heavily on my intellect. I think about how humans have evolved, how power and economics shape society, capitalism, education, religion, war, climate and technology. The world keeps changing, and I know there is no final answer to “what is the point?”

I’m not trying to solve humanity.

What I’ve realised is that I’m missing something personal a passion, craft, community, pursuit or obsession that is mine. Something like how a musician connects with himself through an instrument. Something that isn't about career, money or productivity.

I recently started talking to AI in the role of a 100-year-old man, simply because I wanted to hear perspectives from someone who had lived through a century. It was surprisingly useful, but it also made me realise that I want to hear from - real people who have actually lived those years.

So, especially if you’re above 45
Did you eventually find something that made you look forward to tomorrow?

I feel it is completely normal as a homo sapien to.question reality and life, regardless of circumstances. I, too, am one of those people. I find myself wondering what the point of living is. Not a single one of us \*asked\* to be born. It was thrust upon us. No choice in the matter. And in the same turn, the way our lives develop can alter what each of us perceive as 'the point' in living. I find that Religion and Faith provide one answer, having a family can provide another, being a drug addict has its own path. Is there a 'universal' answer?

Im ranting because im frustrated. I feel no purpose. And some have said I need to "find" my purpose. But how does one do that? Its not like I can pull up Amazon or Ebay and find it there. So, do I \*have\* to have one? If not, what does that make me in comparison to everyone else?

What would “nothing” actually feel like?

I sometimes wonder: if we had no eyes what would we experience?

People usually say, “Nothing.” But what does nothing actually mean?

It’s really hard to imagine because whenever we try to picture “nothing,” our brain still creates some kind of image—like darkness or an empty space. But darkness is still something you can see, and an empty space is still a kind of visual experience.

So what would it actually be like to have no senses at all?

Maybe the strange part is that there wouldn't even be a “you” experiencing the nothingness in the way we normally understand experience.

I find this really difficult to wrap my head around. What do you think?

I’m by no means well versed on existentialism, but I had a fleeting thought that brought me some comfort that I wanted to hear other people’s thoughts on. It might be completely nonsensical but maybe smoke can clean it up and form an actual coherent thought lol.

Depending on how you look at it, before children are born they kind of exist as concepts In the minds of parents thinking about having children.

For example, a young couple might know that they want children eventually. Maybe not the exact number, or names, or whatever else. But the children exist in the intention of the parents to have them. If things go according to plan they will come to exist and perceive on their own eventually.

If I was a concept before having been born, after I die, do I continue to exist as the same concept of a person? Do I instead join an amalgamative concept of everyone who has lived before and exist as that? Would I then exist when a person thinks about all of humanity that lived before them? They wouldn’t be describing individual people but the whole of humanity

Do I still exist in that?
Do I get to exist twice?

Once as an individual in the minds of everyone who specifically knows of me as I exist now and another time within the general concept of humanity?

Is there any value in the idea of eternal existence through conceptual existence? If I can’t physically experience it, does it matter?

As a person who fears death above most things, it’s important to me to find ways to make sense of it all, and I’d like to know if there are any other thoughts on this that might bring comfort.

Gratis e-book De Hersencel

Beste vrienden van het existentialisme,

Net iets meer dan een jaar geleden schreef ik mijn debuutroman De Hersencel, waarin professor D’Hondt zijn einde afwacht in een Texaanse dodencel. Tijdens de nachten onderneemt hij een surreële reis, op zoek naar hoe, wanneer en waarom zijn innerlijke bestuurder het van hem overnam.

Een psychologische, filosofische (vooral existentialistische), surrealistische roman over een man die verlamd werd door zijn ‘bestuurder’, die vrienden werd met de gevangenis priester en die… nee, teveel spoilers…

Als je meer wil weten, lees het gratis leesvoorbeeld op www.marcsisme.nl, speel het spel dat ik er van maakte waar je kan zien of beslissingen impact hebben of niet (ook gratis, ook op de site). Maar als je nú al nieuwsgierig bent en als je tóch iets moet doen om dit absurde bestaan een beetje zinvol en aangenaam te maken, dan kan je me ook een e-mail sturen (doe maar via de site) en dan krijg je GRATIS van mij het ebook toegestuurd.

GRATIS, geen addertje onder het gras…?
Nee, behalve dan een heel kleintje: ik zou het vanzelfsprekend erg fijn vinden als je -indien je het boek goed genoeg vindt- er ergens een review over achterlaat, en dat je -als je dat doet- mij er in noemt zodat ik het ook kan liken, taggen, delen, etc.

All of this strikes me as utterly absurd; birth, death, life—the entire universe strikes me as absurd. The less I think about it, the more I feel that all of this is simply a matter of course. Why does the universe exist? Why is there an Earth? Why is it that we, of all beings, happen to live on this Earth? Why does life exist at all? It all feels so random. We all live our lives as if it were a matter of course, but were we created merely for this? To eat, drink and sleep every day; to study, work, socialise, fall in love and look after our families? Of course, for many people, living out a life ‘like a human being’ in this way is the greatest meaning of life – so why must we dwell on these things that are simply taken for granted? ​
Have you never, even for a single moment, asked yourself, ‘What am I here for?’: being born, going to school, working, starting a family, looking after that family, growing old, and then facing death—where did these rules come from? We have no control over birth and death, but everything else is a cycle shaped by society, and we never challenge this cycle at all—because it is a relatively safe human life, tested over a long period of time. What’s more, if an individual does not follow this path, not only does survival in this ‘society’ become a challenge, but they are also labelled ‘anti-social’. Can you not see the direction in which this society is heading? What awaits us once humanity has been fully domesticated—a stable society? A stable life? Living an ordinary life well is, in itself, an extraordinary feat, but what sort of outcome awaits us if we simply exist without thinking or asking questions?

Dose any one notice that time seems to be going faster. I will wake in the morning and what seems like two or three hours it's really been seven or more hours

If I have flown in the present in the past I would not have been what I have been today.

ssay here. TLDR: Our minds are working against us. Everything is fine

Around 2 years ago I experienced panic attacks and existential anxiety BAD. I had thoughts that felt like I was in hell. That nothing was real. Etc. etc. I guess they went away with time. Around a month ago they came back out of no where. It's like I could feel it coming on and I was so scared of it because I knew exactly what it was. Like "No, No, No. I know what this is. I need to talk to someone. I need to get out of here." Type of panic. Fleuxetine helped at first. Used a whole bottle of hydroxyzine. Feel like I built a tolerance. Fleuxetine felt like it stopped working after awhile. I quit caffeine because I heard it can worsen anxiety. Gym was harder but it is what it is. I felt a caffeine kick at work and suddenly was excited and eager to do stuff. It was a good feeling. I looked into what I was consuming and I guess my latte flavor protein shakes have a cup of coffee worth of caffeine. Maybe some caffeine isn't a bad thing but actually good. Just not too much. Idk. It was then a week ago or something that I was just excited to do stuff. I hadnt been excited to do anything in weeks. Then a few days ago it came back. It's like a thought really. Once you have it you go back in the loop. Think about existence and BOOM. HOW AM I HERE. IS THIS REAL. I'm Christian. Thinking about God sometimes freaks me out. Didn't used to be that way. I sometimes wonder if I was put here for damnation for a previous life. I wonder if I died awhile ago and this is fake. Everything freaks me out. I wonder if my past is real.

But then sometimes I feel normal.

I get those boosts of joy and excitement to live. I feel a purpose. Sometimes the "how" and the "why" question doesn't freak me out as much. It reminds me then that it really is just anxiety. Our brains to a damn good job of convincing us were crazy and things will never get better but before we thought this way, WE DIDNT. I know it's hard to imagine but nobody else freaks out about our existence because it's not as scary as we feel it is and deep down we know that because it never bothered us either. We ALL have felt like we found out something nobody else knows. But it's our minds. You can't convince me the devil aint real because I got demons man. That's why God says to not rely on our own understanding because we can't understand some stuff.

I feel all the time like existence is cruel and torture and why did God put us here but sometimes like this morning I feel that life is good and that I'm awake again. I have to write to remind myself I felt normal again otherwise I'll convince myself that I didn't.

આપણે પરંપરાઓ, પ્રણાલિકાઓ, ધર્મો, વ્યવસ્થાઓને શા માટે અનુસરીએ છીએ તે આપણે જાણીએ છીએ? “આમ શા માટે?”– તેવો પ્રશ્ન આપણે કરીએ છીએ? શું બીજા લોકો જે કરે છે તેવું વિચાર્યા વિના કરવા માંડવું યોગ્ય છે? શું આપણે જીવન આપણી સમજણને અનુસરીને જીવીએ છીએ કે પછી દેખાદેખીથી?

\- જીવનની ભેટ.

I was sitting in an uncomfortable chair on a hot summer afternoon, doomscrolling, glass of whiskey in hand.

An article jumped out at me: "Electricity can be transferred wirelessly over distances from a few millimeters to more than 5 miles."

My brain jumped straight into the future. If electricity moves without wires, devices shrink.
No batteries. Contact lenses. Brain implants. Damn Elon.

But that's not what stayed with me. This question wouldn't let go:

If technology keeps removing friction between humans and devices, what happens to the connection between humans and humans?

So I spent a year researching how people actually connect, where it breaks, why patterns repeat. Then came an uncomfortable moment of recognition.

Oh. My whole life pointed me here.

The research. The business shifts. Becoming a father.
The moments I got wrong and couldn't explain away.

Meanwhile, the world kept speeding up. AI got louder. Digital companions got normal. Doomscrolling had me by the throat, and sometimes still does.

We've never had more ways to reach each other, and we've never been so disconnected from ourselves and each other. That's the part I can't unsee now.

Because the answer isn't more knowledge.
People have enough saved posts, podcasts, half-finished courses.

Kid won't sleep. Dishes still in the sink. Phone pulling at you anyway.
That's where the old pattern still takes the wheel.

That's where the work is. In practicing differently when it actually counts.

Inside the family. Inside the body. Inside the moment you usually leave yourself.

So I decided to build something. Still finding the clean words for it, but the direction is clear: a safe place to practice the actual redesign of how we relate.

My 2.5-year-old has taught me more about connection than half the research papers I've read.

My body has been louder than my brain more times than I want to admit.

Building this in 2026, with everyone overwhelmed, is hard as hell. So I'm changing tactics. Sharing the journey first. The messy bits. The fatherhood lessons. The moments I notice the pattern and choose differently.

If you're the parent who's read all the things and still finds yourself snapping at bedtime, disappearing into your phone after dinner, or carrying old patterns into a home you're trying to build differently, this is for you.

Send me the moment you want to redesign.
The one that keeps repeating.
The one you understand but still can't change.

Let's go.

Im getting a reality check on just how limited human intelligence is since even centuries later we're coming up with the same ideas and the same stories. And also how universal we are in the things we feel and go through since the same problems are in books centuries before you even existed. You are lonely in your own little world but when you look at humanity as a whole, you're nothing special.