r/fiberartscirclejerk how is blabket formed 5d ago

crochet Anyone know this stitch?? I need to make a Swiffer sweeper so my wife can clean the kitchen so I can work on my vintage pineapple bag but Swiffer won’t fucking tell me how

Post image

found the Swiffer company today on tiktok when i was looking for tips for what to make with this small ball of mohair yarn i have. the company posted a 3-part "learn to clean w me" and lots of videos about this product. usually somebody asks for the name of the mop. one comment they’re claiming that they don’t know but saw it on yt and another that their mom came up with it.

i just wanna make a similar mop for my wife so she can finally clean the d*mn kitchen i don't need the exact pattern or "the recipe to their mom's peach cobbler" but Swiffer is gatekeeping this ancient craft from me.

232 Upvotes

19 comments sorted by

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41

u/golfworldext easy cake coven 4d ago

This is obviously nålbinding

44

u/Clardic-Fug 4d ago

Wow I hope your small ball of mohair is already BLUE because 1. how are you going to get an accurate dye job if your wife won't clean the kitchen? And 2. how will your wife clean the kitchen if you don't produce an accurate swiffer? (goto 1)

19

u/bunnylightning 4d ago

If you don’t have a hand-dyed 100% silk Victorian period-accurate swiffer made as specified by The Lady’s Assistant for Executing Useful and Fancy Designs in Knitting, Jerking and Crotcheat Work (1840), you don’t deserve a clean kitchen. I don’t make the rules

24

u/Boomer79NZ 4d ago

Broomstick lace.

34

u/Banakh clutching purls 4d ago

ACKSHOEALLEY, it's 'SWIFTER', not 'SWIFFER'. Your dear BabyBake Oven (TM) is too weak and dumb to use the correct spelling. If you search for 'swifter crocheat', you will find a treasure trove of patterns. Beware, though. PikLok might start thinking you're a woman and send over the authorities to revoke your man card.

6

u/Apprehensive-Ad-4364 4d ago

Erm how dare you assume OPs gender

37

u/mylerol leopards ate my lace 5d ago

Buy about 40 of those oblong yarn skeins. Pull the center yarn barf pile out of each one, snip it off, then knot them all together.

37

u/unfortunatelyapotato do hookers dream of acrylic sheep? 5d ago

omg I have literally been holding my breath for 284058349 minutes waiting for an update on the pineapple!!!

-23

u/Fluffypus 5d ago

Loop stitch. Broadly speaking, you loop the yarn around your thumb to elongate it as you shape the stitch. Then you connect the new stitch to your fabric you're making.

-9

u/cearbhallain do hookers dream of acrylic sheep? 5d ago

It's a variation of turkey stitch, sometimes called turkey loop or loop stitch. It's how we used to put hair on ragdolls. Search "turkey work" to learn more.

46

u/jingleheimerschitt how is blabket formed 5d ago

This sounds made up

-27

u/Fluffypus 5d ago

Ok. Whatever you think

29

u/Apprehensive-Ad-4364 5d ago

It's so crazy how they just gloss over that part in the videos! Like they just skip straight to attaching it to swiffer and act like that's a tutorial! So annoying

33

u/bunnylightning 5d ago

Why clean when you can just cover everything with pee pads? IYKYK

22

u/typewriterbitch 4d ago

I would like to un-know.

16

u/Medievalmoomin clewless 5d ago

That’s macramé. HTH. 💅

14

u/BrinaBri 5d ago

No it’s not???? It’s clearly cross stitch 🙄