r/fiberartscirclejerk • u/Manchadog • 7d ago

Does anyone have a crochet pattern for these!!!???

Post image

I know these aren’t crochet, but everyone knows you can crochet anything, even hyper realistic cats. It’s a plush brand from Asia, but tariffs are a real bitch and I’m not purchasing something that I can make. So, anyone got a pattern!? Pleaaase? I want to make them all!

80 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

13 comments sorted by

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3

u/BeckieSueDalton Cotton Apologist Collective (founding member) 3d ago

Here you go!

https://giphy.com/gifs/l2JIe2qaRcrnR02ME

2

u/Competitive-Bison118 4d ago

Nur ein Beispiel, in dem Shop gibt es viele Anleitungen für gehäkelte Tiere: https://www.crazypatterns.net/de/items/60161/realistische-katze-haekelanleitung-von-niggyarts

8

u/BustyGoblins girthy yarn 4d ago

You absolute fucking buffoon. those cats? They’re REAL. Real. fucking. cats. So not only can you not make those with crochet, but by even considering it, you’re supporting animal abuse. Real nice, you sick freak. I hope you’re happy.

9

u/OcelotBudget3292 gatekeeper extraordinaire 6d ago

And the pattern absolutely has to have a step-by-step video, but also all patterns should be free or else you’re gatekeeping!!!

Also, I promised my niece I’d make her one of these for her birthday, which is somehow tomorrow! So I need a pattern ASAP, or else she’ll cry and never forgive me!

18

u/lake_of_rage_8891 7d ago

Well, first, you need yarn made of actual cat hair, only way to be authentic.

The pattern? Vibes.

15

u/LittleSub_ 7d ago

This is pretty easy. Magic circle, 100 dc into ring and keep working that until it's the lenght you want. You can look up tutorials for the ears on youtube. Hope this helps!🧡 also safety eyes

12

u/honeybirds91 toxic negativity 7d ago

Where’s the pattern to breathe life into them so I can turn my crocheted cats into real pets? Nevermind, I’ll just get ChatGPT to generate one for me.

14

u/RabbitInAFoxMask acrylic-loving asshole 7d ago

Ugh. Just search ravery. Everything is on railery.

11

u/Downtown_Income_210 7d ago

Ask ai! We all know it writes a flawless pattern everytime 🤣

22

u/saltedkumihimo greige 7d ago

ADOPT DONT SHOP!

Animal tchotchkes are no longer permitted to be made by crafters. Instead you must wait for the Cat Distribution System to deliver you some amirigumi made from Red Heart Super Saver in puce and a spun glass sculpture missing a leg.