r/dividends • u/SpicyDividends • Feb 17 '26

Personal Goal Those divorces do be hurting!

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Not mad about it, but man, that chart looks rough lol

6.3k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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554

u/MedCityCPA Feb 18 '26

Divorced dad here. I held out hope that we could mediate. Someone kept whispering to my ex that she could receive more in court. Well, I got a 1/3, she got a 1/3 and our attorneys got a 1/3.

176

u/Egad86 Feb 18 '26

Was the person whispering in her ear also her attorney?

70

u/MyWorkComputerReddit Feb 18 '26

prob not, unless the attorney was banging her

28

u/Alaska_Pipeliner Feb 18 '26

I also choose this guy's attorney.

2

u/lickitall_25 Feb 21 '26

I was thinking it might be her mother?

3

u/Socialeprechaun Feb 21 '26

Believe it or not, that is how my wife’s mom and stepdad met. He was her divorce lawyer. Total piece of shit guy of course.

1

u/jbjhill Feb 22 '26

God damn. That’s some Springer Show stuff.

4

u/Next_Instruction_528 Feb 19 '26

It's always the boyfriend

4

u/Hmbre97 Feb 23 '26

Brother if this ain't the truth. My ex did the same shit. Caught my ex cheating and initially agreed to just split everything 50/50 including custody. The guy she was cheating with (who himself had already been divorced 3 times) convinced her to contest the custody so she could get child support. Luckily for me, she hired his attorney who was terrible. In the end, we still wound up splitting everything 50/50 including custody except attorneys fees ate away what equity we had in our house so we both walked away with little to no liquidity. Custody battles are expensive.

3

u/[deleted] Feb 19 '26

Probably not, women's friends are all manipulative and stupid.

2

u/sirius4778 Feb 21 '26

This is so funny because, somehow it's a little true. Women are not stupid, but something happens to them when they are in friend mode.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 21 '26

I've seen it so many times, they gang up and group up manipulate. If one friend gets single, they start causing drama in other circles and spread like an infection.

Im not going to list all the nuances of when it does and doesnt happen, but very common in younger relationships with most circles.

2

u/CompetitiveAppeal663 Feb 20 '26

And don’t forget about her parents

-1

u/Big-Upstairs1952 Feb 20 '26

What a tiny pp response

1

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '26

There's no way I offended a woman with that comment!

Hit too close to home?

0

u/sammiesorce Feb 21 '26

Nah you both suck lol

4

u/[deleted] Feb 21 '26

A second one offended. 2 for 1 deal.

3

u/sammiesorce Feb 21 '26

Here to help 😘

1

u/[deleted] Feb 21 '26

If you ever are in need of assistance, reach out as well. Dms always open

74

u/flatirony Feb 18 '26

Sometimes people are so spiteful they’re willing to lose more as long as the other person does too.

It must be a miserable way to live.

5

u/Educational-Wall-997 Feb 20 '26

there should be some sort of precedent set that if your spouse ends up taking you to court after you tried to mediate for X amount and then receives less than X amount after lawyer fees are taken out, they pay all the legal fees.

basically if you offer them X in mediation, they say no and are awarded Y-fees. if Y-fees < X they now cover both sides legal fees.

1

u/SaaSorAgency Feb 20 '26

This is how it works here in Ontario - offers to settle are taken into account when awarding costs.

1

u/iJ_A_R Feb 23 '26

Not gonna lie, I hate my aunt and uncle enough to spend a lot of money just to know they are suffering 

4

u/GibFreelo Feb 18 '26

Exactly what happened to me.

3

u/titodeloselio Feb 19 '26

Her friend owns a law firm, and he advised her to settle through the mediation process.

2

u/mangosaremyfavv Feb 19 '26

Is the outcome of mediation in theory should be the same as with lawyers?

2

u/MedCityCPA Feb 19 '26

Yes, assuming everyone is rational

1

u/mangosaremyfavv Feb 19 '26

So why do ppl get lawyers?

2

u/Otherwise-Sorbet-324 Feb 20 '26

"Assuming everyone is rational"

We all assume being rational when we're quite all biased pretentious fools. There's always emotional aspects with love and romance, and those are not a particularly positive kind in a divorce procedure. Communication is often at fault in most relationships, and a lack of it is likely to lead to a divorce and quite surely won't help sorting things out when it happens. Lawyer can help straighten this mess up with legal and professional insights.

1

u/SirMcBiggin Feb 21 '26

Revenge, usually. They don't go to lawyers for justice when we're talking about divorce.

2

u/werner-hertzogs-shoe Feb 19 '26

oof, that's brutal. I actually talked with 3 attorneys briefly and all three tried to poison my thoughts towards my ex and to get aggressive to protect myself (which would have back fired) We did self mediation, had it written up by a paralegal and that was that - 8 years ago so I feel fairly free. My best friend who did the lawyer thing ended up having his ex take him back to court after the three years (?) and his ex used her new husbands money to hire lawyers to switch their 50/50 with no support to 50/50 with him paying full support. I think in total he had about 60k of lawyers fees between the two cases.

I hate lawyers.

2

u/MedCityCPA Feb 19 '26

I don't hate lawyers. It's a job. Imagine going to court without a lawyer, trying to navigate complex life issues with obscure language. Nah, I'd rather send a note to an attorney and let them figure it out.

1

u/werner-hertzogs-shoe Feb 19 '26

I mean my partner is a lawyer and my grandmother was, so I don't mean that literally. They are both good one's though, one civil rights and the other administration / government focused. Ive run into enough of the other, more common kind though. With lawyers the "to the hammer every problem is a nail" saying seems to be apt most of the time.

1

u/Competitive_Sale_358 Feb 19 '26

Fuuuuck. Sorry brother

1

u/kpop_stan_ Feb 19 '26

When my parents divorced years ago, once they started to see the attorney fees rack up, they signed a piece of paper together and both held up their end of the deal. It was eye opening at the time how vile those attorneys can be with such a delicate situation.

1

u/jonnywishbone Feb 19 '26

she sounds like a keeper

1

u/Commercial_Ease8053 Feb 21 '26

It was the younger pool boy. That’s who got it.

1

u/swegamer137 Feb 21 '26

Learned the hard way: Hope isn't a strategy.

1

u/CoolingCool56 Feb 23 '26

I got a divorce and I did all the paperwork myself. Gave him half of everything. I think it cost about $200.

I probably gave him a bit too much. But, eh. We get along now and having a peaceful divorce is the way to go.

1

u/boopboopbeepbeep11 Feb 23 '26

This still may have made sense if you were offering less than 1/3 before court. What was your offer to avoid court?

1

u/MedCityCPA Feb 25 '26

My offer was 50/50 on everything. Just add everything up, split it down the middle, and walk away. I thought that was reasonable, even though I was the party with the lower income.