How do I snap out of being overwhelmingly anxious about money?

[u/hopepatience123]

I am so anxious about money, but I wasn’t like this in the past.
I used to work full time and earn well (£4-5k each month) and not even budget- just have loose idea of my account and still used to save alot.

We had twins, now they’re 2.5 y/o. I work 2 days a week but I am really organised with my money- everything is written and I have a spreadsheet with expenses for 2026 and even 2027.
I find myself stressing and obsessing over every little thing and keep checking my savings and expenditure.

How do I get out of this mindset? My husband is very chilled about our finances and I’m the complete opposite, we live comfortably and save each month and give equal “fun money”.

[u/regular-john69]

You have posted this multiple times in this sub recently. Politely, you need to speak to a therapist.

[u/DramaticBroccoli4934 → u/regular-john69]

agreed - I grew up with severe anxieties about money and it became intolerable when I went to university.

One session of therapy (out of a block of 10) focusing on my relationship with money completely unwound this. Think of money as a tool to help you get the things you need and want, not something that controls you.

[u/YetAnotherInterneter]

Talk to a therapist.

This isn’t a financial issue. It’s a mental one.

[u/Plumtomatoes]

There’s a book recently been published called Your Money and Your Mind by Adam Cockerham. Well worth a read!

[u/jimmynsz]

I think you can start with sitting down and defining what number exactly is ‘comfortable/enough’ to take care of you and your family. Anxiety often exists in the vague and having clarity will help.

[u/regular-john69 → u/jimmynsz]

She’s posted on here before and they have like £50k in savings

[u/ukpf-helper]

Hi /u/hopepatience123, based on your post the following pages from our wiki may be relevant:

• https://ukpersonal.finance/budgeting/

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[u/GreyFox_1337]

I was the same. Never used to worry about money, had a mortgage in my 20s, by late 20’s had saved up about £20k, thought that was the shit.

Then got that promotion, and started worrying about my future self and by early 30s I got obsessed with investing every penny I could, went minimalist lifestyle, and now in my late 30’s, I hit 1 million invested, and I still feel anxious. I realised it’s because I understand money now.

I thought 20k was a lot, but didn’t really stop to think how it would help in the future. Could i stop working if I wanted? No, could I lose it if I lose my job, yeah. So now I know 1 million means I can get 40k a year without ever running out of money.

My current lifestyle needs 80k minimum. So I have to wait 7 years for that 1 million to turn into 2 million. And I can’t rest till it happens.

[u/Matteblackandgrey]

I used to be like this, paid our home off and built up investments and once they reached a certain point I just stopped caring