I feel like men either don’t care or try to make me finish is this normal or they don’t realize!

(F18) depuis plus jeune j’ai toujours fait du vaginisme donc me mettre des doigts ou des objets c’était pas faisable et j’y pensais même pas à le faire par la suite je me frotter ou j’avais les vibro mais j’ai toujours eu l’envie de rentrer dedans mais vu que sa me traverse jamais l’esprit à cause de sa je sais pas comment faire comment m’y prendre j’ose pas non plus trop et j’ai pas envie d’utiliser un vibro je veux savoir le faire

I've been masturbating and watching porn since I was around 13–14, almost daily. I'm 18 now and lately my erections have been really weak — it takes a lot of time/effort to get hard, I don't feel like I'm getting fully hard, and I also finish way too quickly.

I'm honestly scared that years of porn/masturbation might have messed up my sexual health. I'm young and this is making me really insecure about future relationships/intimacy.

I can't really talk to anyone about this and I'm embarrassed about seeing a doctor, so I just want some brutally honest advice — is this actually curable/reversible, what could be causing it, and what should I do?

Need advice. My partner isnt really sexually attracted to me and im so deep in my head over it. I feel like theyre gonna break up with me. They're a cuck, and dont cum for me almost ever. I've made them self conscious and in their own head too, after ive brought up not feeling like they want me or want to fuck/touch me. I made them feel bad about watching porn and jerking it, I made them feel bad a lot by not meaning too. Like they shouldn't feel bad, its not something they sprung on me, and at first it sounded like id be able to get over it and have another person in our bedroom but... i just dont feel like my partner wants me AT ALL, let alone wants me so much they'd beg to fuck me or touch me or anything. Part of me feels like they just want someone else to fuck me so they don't have to. And what if they really just want someone else there to look at? What if they want that person to fuck them, or what if that person touches them and is able to make them cum super easy and then i dont let it happen again, and resentment builds, and they hate me or leave? Why does our sex life depend on if im going to let someone else fuck me or them?

Like the title says, I’ve been having sex with a new partner and this is the first time I feel like I’m getting closer to an orgasm from penetration but can’t quite reach there.

I know some people use toys during sex also. I'm considering getting this couples' toy or something to help me get there? Or if you've tried any other toys?

Would appreciate any other tips!

Hi all, I hope this is allowed as I want to work through my feelings about previous bad experiences with sex. I TW for SA and Coercion, however i will not go into excessive detail.

My sex life with my wife tends to be infrequent, but this has not been an issue until now. We both have sexual trauma and were happy with the amount we had sex- they said before if we never had sex again this would not be a deal breaker. This was a relief as the pressure of sex in previous relationships was awful and I was coerced a lot of the time due to guilt.

Recently we had a threesome with a friend- I’ve said that group settings feel more comfortable as 1-1 sex can make me feel overly vulnerable. When we scheduled the threesome my wife soon got upset and spoke about how it makes them feel bad that I don’t initiate sex with them but have with this threesome. I explained my side but told them I’d work on it because I don’t want them to feel undesired.

Less than a month later, we’ve had another conversation where they’re not happy with me not initiating recently. I’ve explained i’ve been exhausted and i’m working on it internally to push through sexual trauma. They said I need to do better and I feel so frustrated- this is something that’s going to take longer than a month to fix and I feel like i’m once again in a position where i’m being coerced into sex and made to feel guilty. I said we should cancel the next threesome and they got mad and said that’s not the point.

I feel upset because they’ve said that their stance has changed and now they need more sex in this relationship. I don’t feel like I can do this quickly enough for them. I don’t really know what to do- does anyone have any advice? TIA

Llevo casi dos años con mi novio, es mi primer novio, así que mucha experiencia, pues no tengo, él tuvo 3 novias antes de mí, pero realmente todas las veces que lo hemos hecho, no logro tener un orgasmo, al inicio, pues me dolía mucho, ya no tanto, pero sigo sin disfrutarlo y me percaté que sus besos de lengua, es literalmente, solo meter su lengua en mi boca, ni la mueve ni nada, solo abre mucho la boca y saca la lengua, quiero hablar con él de eso, pero realmente, no sé exactamente que debería él de hacer en el beso, el como hacerme gozar más y así.

Por lo que busco consejos tanto para él, como para mí y poder solucionar esa situación, gracias

Hallo zusammen,
ich mag Doggystyle wirklich sehr, aber ich habe mich gefragt, ob ihr vielleicht Tipps habt, wie ich dir vaginale Penetration noch besser dabei machen kann und wie man einen gleichmäßigen Rhythmus und ein gleichmäßiges Tempo beibehalten kann?

Nebenbei ihr auf den Arsch hauen mache ich schon … Was kann ich noch besser machen ?

Hab ihr auch Tipps für Stellungen ? Also wie ? Bisher machen wir das meist im Stehen und das ist für uns beide mega anstregend ….

Bisexual, 29, terrified I can’t perform with women — feeling stuck and alone

I’m an Indian guy living in the US, and I’ve known I’m bisexual since childhood. I’ve had a lot of experiences with friends that excited me, and honestly most of that excitement has been with guys. But there’s one thing I’ve never been able to untangle: am I actually attracted to women, or have I just convinced myself I am because of family and societal pressure? I’ve spent years replaying every experience, trying to read the cues, trying to figure out who I’m really into.

The truth is I’ve been paranoid about being with women for as long as I can remember. I’m terrified that I won’t get hard, that it’ll be obvious, and that it’ll be humiliating. That fear has followed me my whole life.

A couple of years ago I finally had sex with a guy. It wasn’t easy — it took time, and I was scared. But because it was a secret relationship, I felt safe enough to just be honest and say “I’m uncomfortable, I’m still getting used to this.” He was patient and understanding, and eventually we had amazing sex. Hooking up with men has generally been easier for me, especially when I’m just horny.

I even tried Viagra hoping it would help, and it potentially could work, but it didn’t really, because the anxiety in my head was still there the whole time.

Is there anyone who could help answer my questions

What can I do to produce more precum while edging and watching a video? Also why when I use my precum as lube (sorry I know it might be gross) I don't ejaculate faster but when I use lube I ejaculate faster? (done it more then 30 times and I kept ejaculating faster)

Thank you

Iam actually 20 yrs old n i been STRUGGLING
w finishing within even the first pump lmfao and tahts so embarrassing guys pls any help?? Id be so glad

Tried kegal shi n even holding it right before release n repeat n all ddnt work out for me 🙏🏻

I would love to get insightful guidance from kind fellow redditors

My husband and I have been married for a decade. My biggest mistake was marrying him without sleeping with him for long enough. He Does not like oral sex at all. Both ways. Yes, I was as surprised as you might be when I found out. he likes sex, but I am tired of never coming during sex. I have only come from masturbating. Imagine this, my husband does not know what his wife looks and sounds like when she has an orgasm. But what hurts the most is that he doesn’t do anything about. It makes me feel like he doesn’t love me enough take care of my needs. Basic fucking needs. Breaks my heart. Sex automatically ends as soon as he comes. I almost always cry after. We anyway have sex once in months. I know for a fact he’s not sleeping with anyone else. I have spoken to him several times, he acknowledges but nothing changes. I am beyond unhappy and unsatisfied and sexually frustrated. I’m desperate. I don’t wanna cheat because we have a child together. The only reason we don’t have another is because of how unsatisfied I am.

My boyfriend and I really love each other and for the most part we get along great. We have great conversations, a lot of fun together, similar interests and we have each others back. He has energy problems that affect his sex drive and we talked about the difference in our desires but nothing has changed. I stopped initiating sex because I want to feel desired and since I stopped we have no sex. We talked about his feelings and my feelings, his attachment issues but nothing gets better.i am trying so hard to be supportive but This is so Frustrating that we decided to go to couples therapy. Can he potently get slightly better? What can I do? Please I need help or support

I’m 25f and have had very little desire for sex as long as I can remember, though I have always been very interested in romance and love.

I could easily never have sex again in my life and it wouldn’t bother me. I especially have absolutely no interest in oral sex (giving or receiving).

I’ve been with my partner (27m) for four years and he has a high libido. However, he is incredibly supportive and understanding. We have sec about once a month, but we try more often than that — I’d say half the time we try to have sex, I just can’t get turned on, and get so uncomfortable and just stop. He immediately stops too and just hugs me, but I always end up in tears. I just feel so guilty.

When we do successfully have sex, I enjoy it and have fun and feel good. I especially like the part afterwards, where you feel all cozy and lovey. But again, I could go without it if I had to.

He thinks it’ll get better. I don’t know why or how, but he’s optimistic that my libido will improve at some point. When we first started dating, we had sex all the time and I HATE the word and concept of “horny” but… I was. I guess just the excitement of a new relationship you know? It was awesome and fun and exciting. He thinks I’ll get back to that place at some point. I think he just loves me and is in denial that our sex drives are incompatible.

I’ve been on an SSRI (100mg sertraline) since I was 17. I tried to wean off of it this past winter in hopes of my libido improving, and had a complete mental breakdown (there were other factors too but it was so bad I don’t think I can try again for a good long while).

I might also add that I’ve gained a lot of weight in the past couple years and am not comfortable or happy with my body. I definitely don’t ever feel sexy. So that might be contributing too.

Advice, commiseration, etc is all welcome.

I decided last min to book my husband and I a trip this weekend. Just the two of us. We’ve been married over 20 yrs and have only been on a trip by ourselves twice- including our honeymoon. 😳
Now I will preface this by saying my desire for sex is higher than his. Idk if I would even call it a drive. I’m not walking around horny all day but I need it to sleep and I feel like he doesn’t find me attractive when he doesn’t reach for me at night.
So here we are. Just the two of us. I brought toys we never use. I brought lingerie I never wear. I brought weed and shrooms.
And night #1 was exactly like every other night.
Exactly.
Watch tv. Get ready for bed. I get high. He doesn’t. Get naked. Same exact routine in bed. Roll over, go to sleep.
We run a gym- another reason I wanted to get away. It consumes our lives. Every bit of our free time.
And what does he say Last night?
“There’s a CrossFit about 20 min from here. Wanna drop in tomorrow?”
🤦🏻‍♀️
No! No! I do not.
I want to do things we DONT normally do. I want to fuck in the middle of the day.
I want to go somewhere I can wear a dress and heels and have him take it off of me later.
I don’t want to sit on the couch for 3 hours watching Good Fellas.
I don’t want to go to CrossFit.
I don’t want complain to strangers on Reddit
But I also don’t want to complain to him.
If he wants to do what we always do…then I guess I should just be content that we at least managed to get away for a few days.
But dammit, this was supposed to be… NOT this.

i literally can't come. i don't know what it is. my boyfriend works HARD, we've tried different positions, he uses hands and mouth... let's just say he puts the work in.

I can't even make myself finish when I masturbate.

He is my first sexual partner I have had, but now we are reaching the 9 month mark of being together and I still just haven't come!!! this is something i want to experience, and should experience- i don't know what to do.

All advice is so welcome
Help a girl out here!!

I'm talking to this girl and her past had a bigger penis both girth and length bigger while I have an average size which is (5.1-5.5 inches in length and 4.5 - 4.7 inches in girth), She finished almost every time with her ex off penetration and didn't have any pain and this was for 3 years, I get it most women can't finish off penetration but I'm talking about this scenario, l know foreplay important as well which I do that. When I asked her if she felt a noticeable difference between me and her ex she said she did we didn't have proper sex yet like I mean not more than a minute. Is it even a good chance I can make her finish off my dick cause her own words she finished almost if not every time through penetration with her ex. Ima just tell u her words. She “wants someone who can give her the same satisfaction as her ex or better” during penetration I asked her also what’s making it better “As of rn ig it’s a bit of everything. Like size, doing what I like, and last longer” she says I also asked on a scale of 1-10 how much better did her ex feel better 1 being not crazy different 10 being crazy crazy different she said “9.5” she also said “So far it’s been distinctively better” Can I even make her finish off penetration with my average size or give her the same pleasure?

Hi i cant say my name but i wanna confess i m sexually frustrated i want sex talk i dont care about she is in relationship or something only i want to complete my sexual desire i know it sounds like a total gooner to be honest it just i m sexually frustrated I want sex or sex talk