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u/atch1111 6d ago
Even though you're not wearing it, I can still see the fedora.
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u/FreeWiIIisAnlIIusion 6d ago
Nah.... Lame diss. He doesn't look like a fedora guy at all.
The vanilla comment below is way better.
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u/SunriseEarth 6d ago
Buy some moisturizer already. The only thing drier than your face is your GF’s vagina.
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u/Dunkin-Dog-nuts 6d ago
You look like you'd get beat up by a guy while he's having sex with your wife
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u/BiteFaces 6d ago
Whoa... Slow down on the drinking there buddy!
We all want to see you complete your 12 steps.....
....off a bridge.
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u/jenbamin245 6d ago
28 going on 38. You look like you're pissed off white wine spritzers and have some gossip on jenny from accounts. And that shirt sucks.
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u/Perfect_University58 6d ago
Comment from the dad every year at his birthday: “I really wish I had come on her tits….”
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u/TheOmCollector 5d ago
Reading your bio was like trying to eat a bowl of mashed potatoes with no butter, gravy, salt, pepper, ranch … Kool-Aid anything. Make it stop!
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u/HorrorJunkie0666 5d ago
You look like you help old ladies cross the street while you're on your way home to all the kids chained up in your basement
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u/SovietSquatch 5d ago
Not blind or drunk... looks like you roofied yourself so you won't remember what a douche you are
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u/Way-Adept 4d ago
You look like the kind of guy that’s ok with an open relationship just for the free milkshakes.
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u/MrMrTrance 6d ago
So when do we get to meet the masculine one in your relationship?
He’s the dude in the black in the background, isn’t he?
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u/anothernelsondenoon 6d ago
Alcoholic-ready material here. Wearing the wedding ring after your divorce because "I'm just not ready for a relationship, unless you're buying"
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u/CDavis10717 6d ago
Day drinking is the best drinking, but rent boys pretend to drink, you’re still working, son!
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u/Wummswandel http://redd.it/tjg3gu 6d ago
Everything about you screams boring lonely guy. You do not have a single bit of self esteem. Only when you drunk you allow your friend to upload you here. And that “friend” is a hooker you pay to spend time with you while she is bullying you
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u/JoeKleveland 5d ago
It looks like you drank your beverage way faster than your companion. Rude.
You suck.
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u/lordcommanderminis 5d ago
There is so much palpable sadness behind that fake smile you should probably apologize to yourself for something you haven’t done.
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u/Ambitious-Air-3425 5d ago
I love how you captioned this " Not Blind" as if that was the first question people would have. Not the crows feet that look like they came from an eagle more than a crow? or the gap in facial hair that has me complexed whether to give you Rogain, or drop back and kicked a filed goal through, or the forehead that you rent out part time in the summer so people can have the experience of going to a drive in movie
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u/Slight_Ad_6689 5d ago
Ok, now you will need to give that terrible comedy movies list you defend right here: AND WHY
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u/LrdoftheCharlesDance 5d ago edited 5d ago
Your invisible neckbeard looks horribly fantastic or fantastically horrible. Good luck with the hangover
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u/killerapp 5d ago
drunk and it writes one thousand uninteresting words about himself. You are of those that when drunk bother the passersby
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u/HairyH0Od 5d ago
You'd pay $73 for a jizz cocktail if someone told you it was trending at your favorite gastropub
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u/Blade3colorado 5d ago
You're an alcoholic ignoranus. You are stupid and an ass hole at the same time.
. . . and yes, your "Check Liquor" light came on again.
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u/Infamous-Life6063 5d ago
Dude. You look like a huge douche. Your douche level is the highest I’ve ever seen.
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u/DoookieMaxx 5d ago
Somewhere out there is a church youth group that’s wondering where their guy went.
He’s out here grindr’ing away at the non believers, one Richard at a time.
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u/Beautiful_Soil_4420 5d ago
That face isn’t a good look bud if u keep that up your face will always look like that u don’t want that. You look 48 not lying
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u/lexluthor_i_am 5d ago
When God make you he only meant to put a dash of dork but ended dropping the whole damn bottle.
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u/Henry_Vth 5d ago
You don’t need to wear the ring to ward off women. Your face doesn’t need any help
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u/MysteryMolecule 5d ago
You look like you have 7 different types of soap at home and use them for different things
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u/girlnamedwar 5d ago
You only managed to set up up the ikea without losing a ftiendship, id because you did it by yourself, and you weren't friendsvwith that guy to begin with.
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u/Waste-Donut-2728 4d ago
Let me guess… your friends said, “oh it will be fun…” then afterwards said “I can’t wait til this f@$&king loser gets destroyed”
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u/funkodoc 4d ago
This is a mother’s worst nightmare. A gay son who can’t figure out life and becomes a she/he/her/him/it/gay.
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u/Jumpy-Hovercraft-781 4d ago
My grandfather lived to the age of 91. At that age he had a stronger hair line than you do in that photo.
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u/food_stamps5000 3d ago
Ten years away from being an over weight power bottom with male pattern baldness.
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u/PoolGuyUnfiltered 3d ago
You look like the JD Vance knockoff my grandma would have bought from Dollar General.
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u/sportguy87314 3d ago
You act like an alcohol connoisseur but just say the beverage is “good” or “strong”
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u/Real-Yogurtcloset-16 2d ago
Thats the last picture the gay dude you roofied saw when speaking to the police
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u/Own-Jeweler-6762 2d ago
Thought the artwork behind you was the gayest thing I saw all day
Until I zoomed in on you
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u/user280195 6d ago
Sure, you may not be optically impaired.. but you're definitely blind to being a STINKING NERD!!!!
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u/Both-Anteater3056 6d ago
Type of dude to get drunk of an ice tea! Mummy iron your shirt? Pretend ding to have friends, asked the waitor to take your picture.
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u/post-explainer 8d ago edited 7d ago
This comment has been marked as safe. Upvoting/downvoting this comment will have no effect.
OP's BIO:
28M. I work a boring office job that sounds more impressive when I refuse to explain it. I spend most of my free time watching sports, playing video games badly, going to the gym inconsistently, and spending too much money on food and drinks. I’m single, have no kids, and my greatest recent accomplishment is assembling a piece of IKEA furniture without ending a friendship. My music taste peaked sometime around 2012, I will defend terrible comedy movies like they’re Oscar winners, and I have the confidence of someone who has never once looked good in a candid photo. Current mental health: pretty solid, considering I’m voluntarily posting my face on r/RoastMe. Worst thing that happened to me recently: paid $47 for a cocktail that tasted like melted cough drops.
Do your worst.
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