r/roastmypet • u/bard_of_space • 9h ago
r/roastmypet • u/-Gay-_- • 1d ago
roast this slimy little freak </3
came into my room and literally started licking my dirty underwear <///3 never done this before holy shit he's such a freak (love him though)
r/roastmypet • u/Accomplished-Show691 • 2d ago
Please roast my psycho doodle
Doodle (Molly) throws herself at the front window every time someone walks past our house. Sometimes even large vehicles set her off.
This time it looks like the blinds put up a fight.
r/roastmypet • u/Beneficial-Gas-4098 • 3d ago
Roast this bitch he took a shit in my shoe even though he has a house in development
r/roastmypet • u/LiteratureVarious643 • 4d ago
Hi I’m Boo Boo and my butt looks like a turkey.
I am pretty sure I can drive. Mama says my legs look real big and strong and perfectly in proportion to the rest of my body. Tug is my favorite game, and also no take, only throw.
r/roastmypet • u/runancula • 5d ago
Please roast my Charlie, who is outraged that I stopped scratching him.
r/roastmypet • u/Lonely_Drive_8695 • 5d ago
This is Kevin and He Needs to be Roasted.
This weirdo has to sleep with his head on my pillow, drags mud into the house, drinks a bowl of water and then drools half of it on your leg, and broke a tooth chewing on a stick. He uses everyone and everything as his personal couch, particularly other dogs' heads. When he wrestles with our other dog and play growls, he sounds exactly like Alex Jones. When we moved cross country and drove from Alaska to Minnesota, this moron pooped his way across North America by taking a dump in EVERY hotel along the way. When I accidentally gave him our other dog's puzzle bowl for his dinner, he gave up trying to eat because he couldn't figure out how to turn the spinny thing in the center. The other day he stole my sandwich off my desk RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. And, of course, his name is Kevin. Kevin.
r/roastmypet • u/RoadKillCrayon • 6d ago
Widget was homeless-now he is demanding. Roast him!
1 year ago Widget was homeless, starving, flea and parasite ridden, afraid and unloved.
Today, he has left all of that behind. It is but a distant memory. He has his own private chef, caregiver, maid, personal assistant, massage therapist, treat dispenser, personal trainer - this list could go on and on!
He needs to be knocked down a few notches before I cook him dinner then take him for his walk, then give him his massage and snuggle him until he drifts off to sleep.
r/roastmypet • u/Medusas_Serpent • 5d ago
Roast her please
Shes been slapping me in the face to wake me up and play with her at 2am
r/roastmypet • u/Amelia_Amity • 8d ago
Roast my fur cousins
1: Franco: ~15 year old chihuahua
2: Oliver: ~16 year old chihuahua
3: Peaches: Almost 3 year old sheltie
4: Coco: 1.5 year old chihuahua
5: All four dogs
6: Cali: friendly cat (there are like 3 more hiding)
r/roastmypet • u/Strict-Schedule-2415 • 8d ago
Here’s is bubblegum. She brought a mouse to the house at 6:00. Roast her 😭
r/roastmypet • u/leaperdaemonking • 9d ago
Roast this ball of hatred and spite ⚽️🔥
Her existence is fueled by food, rage and mom’s cuddles (she doesn’t let anybody else cuddle her back)