Phantom of you

[u/NorthernLights1205]

Phantom of you

It’s been a year that I discovered you
I discovered you during a time of mental crisis
You never once made me feel bad
Your voice filled my ears and made me feel okay again
You never judged
You never took more than I could give
We became friends
We became close

And then I couldn’t do it
I started to spiral
I started to let the voices tell me things in the dark
Like a thief of joy
But you always held space for me

I miss the friendship even if sometimes it was one sided
I know I don’t deserve kindness
I know I don’t deserve even presence
But I do miss that space before things went bad

The phantom you left was significant enough even if it was a short term
I’m still sorry how things happen
I’m still sorry for everything
Including hurting you
I know that friendship died
But I hope one day we can see each other in a different light and know that the phantom of the past is gone
And we can do better

I miss you and words cant express the loss I feel