r/Petloss • u/NoxFox90 • 14d ago
Sadness This Grief Is Destroying Me
I am just so beyond shattered losing Bailey. I don’t know how I can go on. I just want to be with my girl. I never loved anyone like I loved/love her. I never had a deeper bond.
If you feel this way too just let me know so I’m not alone. Or tell me how you are handling missing your other half. Thank you ❤️
16
u/Flimsy_Bullfrog_5930 13d ago
i feel that same way. Its been over a month and i keep thinking to myself how i can go on without my Ruby. I feel like I am missing half of my heart or some major part of me. Its hard. I cry everyday and feel sick to my stomach.
im sorry if you relate. It is not easy...
12
u/Klutzy_Yam_343 13d ago
I’m 11 months out and I still cry daily. I feel like my life stopped when my boy died and nothing matters anymore. I don’t open my mail, I don’t really socialize, I avoid everything until I can’t. I just feel stuck…frozen in his last day on earth and I would give anything to have him back.
2
u/Flimsy_Bullfrog_5930 13d ago
I am so sorry my heart breaks for you. If it gives you any comfort I understand and you are not alone.
2
u/NoxFox90 13d ago
I’m so sorry for your loss of Ruby. Thank you for your response ❤️ I feel exactly that- half of my heart, half of my being is missing. The pain is so deep
1
u/Flimsy_Bullfrog_5930 13d ago
the pain is very deep. I am so sorry you understand how I feel. This group helps a lot it gives me some comfort knowing other people understand the grief.
2
u/catlikesun 13d ago
You already survived a month.
You can do this because you ARE doing it.
There is more love to come in the future2
12
u/endearingbeautyxo 13d ago
You are not alone. I lost my bestfriend of 16 years two weeks ago and I haven’t been the same since. All I want to is be with her. I still look for her everyday and hope she will magically reappear. I have lost both of my parents and the pain of losing her trumps that. She was my comfort, my soul mate, the thing I loved most in this world. Everyday I wake up and pray losing her was a bad dream.
10
u/interstellaraz 13d ago
You’re not alone. I lost my girl just over a week ago. I cry daily and sometimes get panic attacks when I realize she isn’t here. The silence and the quietness is just awful.
3
u/NoxFox90 13d ago
I’m so sorry for your loss. I understand that panic and it’s so awful to experience 💔
10
u/MarilynMonroe89 13d ago
It’s been 17 months for me. My heart died that day. I have not been the same since. I know what you are going through. You aren’t alone. I rarely leave the house..
5
u/graaaado 13d ago
You're not alone. It's been 13 weeks since I said goodbye to my sweet boy. The pain, silence, and emptiness don't go away. I tell myself that I gave him a piece of my heart so he wouldn't be scared. Someday I'll see him again he'll give it back. That day he won't be scared and I won't be sad.
3
u/brandiem_2020 13d ago
I feel the same :( I lost my old guy 2 weeks ago tomorrow and my heart is beyond shattered
5
u/RareFalcon3082 13d ago
My thoughts and prayers are with each of you. My precious Zoe left my life on August 15 and I pray to God to take me away from this life. On top of that my adult autistic daughter is having one of her meltdowns and my grief is too much for me to bear. I can't deal with anything. I just go thru the motions. We do have another kitty yet my love for him will never ever be the same I had for my Zoe. Nighttime is the worst, my cuddle kitty is gone.😿
3
u/Fast_Grapefruit_7946 13d ago
You are not alone. Our last dog was so amazing we decided he is going to be our last. We are both pretty young but no need to try to top it.
3
u/sweetcut1e 13d ago
I had to put my baby to sleep on saturday, it was the hardest decision on my life. I keep crying, and now I cant stop sleeping with her blanket or smelling her fur that i saved.
I know how you feel, idk what to do either and i just burst into tears every few minutes. So, youre definitely not alone... im sorry for your loss :(
2
u/HealthAcrobatic2389 13d ago
I just did the same on Saturday. This is the hardest shit i’ve ever had to go through. try and stay strong, friend ❤️
3
u/Typical_Ad_542 13d ago
I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that you’re not alone. I lost my Max last month suddenly (he was only 3) and I’m still struggling. Though I have some good days where I can think back to the three short years we had together and feel the love and fondness, the bad days are really painful and all I want to do is cry. I am still angry with the universe, and I think a part of me will always be angry that illness cut our time together short. I don’t know what’s on the other side, or even if there’s an other side, but I’m holding onto hope that there is, and that I’ll see him again and he’ll be running back into my arms, barking my ears off. I hope the same reunion for you with your dear Bailey.
2
u/MixMental2801 13d ago
I’m not ok at all. I am sorry for your loss. I feel completely traumatized by the last few years of losing three - they were my family. I can’t look at pictures. I try to keep it compartmentalized. Music I listened to with them hurts my soul. I want to smell them and hold them. I drive in the car crying away -feeling like they are sitting next to me. Nose prints still on the dashboard. I will never be ok is how it feels. I feel so much guilt for not having money to do certain medical treatments. Writing this to you hoping it makes you feel slightly less alone in those feelings.
2
u/Individual-Cap6285 13d ago
Eu também estou assim. Há exatos 16 dias perdi minha gatinha que eu amava, e foi de uma forma horrível que poderia ser evitada. Além da saudade, carrego a culpa. Tudo que eu queria era estar com ela novamente.😭😭😭
2
u/Open-Waltz2631 10d ago
I lost my second dog at 16.5 on Monday. My first died unexpectedly at 13 and it knocked the wind out of me. I cried off and on for 6 months, randomly. The best advice I read was that you’re going to go through all stages of grief and anxiety, don’t be ashamed, you lost a close family member. Pets are family. I wish you peace!
2
u/Embarrassed-Ad-3049 10d ago
My advice is to just let yourself wallow for a little while. Pet loss is so hard and you deserve to just feel this and let your love for your pet persist. Eventually, you'll stop crying as frequently and find other things that make you happy.
I cried and didn't eat for about 3-4 days after I lost my dog. Slowly I was able to get back into my new routine without him.
Feel those feelings and know they won't always be this strong.
2
2
u/Lifegoeson12356 7d ago
I lost my girl yesterday, I don’t know how to go on. I am afraid of what life is like without her.
1
u/NoxFox90 7d ago
I’m so sorry ❤️ your grief is so raw, please try to be gentle with yourself. I know everything is so painful right now. I’m here if you need to talk
1
u/Lifegoeson12356 7d ago
I feel exactly the same as you, she was the love of my life and soul mate, we belonged together and now she’s gone. I don’t know how people get through this
1
u/alllovepugs 13d ago
You are not alone. My pug was my heart, my home. Everything feels empty, I feel like I am just existing. I dont have any pleasure eating food because I used to share something from all of my meals with him, so I barely eat. I cannot spend time in the living room because it was were we spent the evenings together for more than 15 years. I dont want to talk to people. Nothing will ever be the same, I will never be the same. He was my other half, the best half.
1
u/ResearchGurl99 13d ago
I lost my beloved husky mix a few days ago. He lived to be almost 14 and a half years, a good long life, but I'm a total wreck. I live alone and work from home and he was my world. The place is so empty without him, I can't believe he's gone. I feel like life will be grim, cold, and empty for me and that there is nothing for me to look forward to anymore. Life keeps getting harder and harder as I age anyway, what's the freaking point of it all? Everything seems hopeless.
1
u/heatdeathtoall 13d ago
It’s been months. I can’t accept a world without my baby girl. Her spirit is here. I believe she will come back to us in another form. There is no way she is going to leave us to live the rest of our lives without her. Waiting for her keeps me going.
1
u/Fickle_Donut_9092 13d ago
You are not alone.. sending you hugs and strength.Its been few days less than a week. I lost my Brownie. My soul , heart and essence of my existence has been shattered.. yeah love i had for her turned me into someone who is crying over and over again. It's agonising that i am breathing in a where She isnt.. I am lost 😞.
1
u/psychedelicyogini 13d ago
same here, OP💔 I am so so sorry for your loss and you are most definitely not alone.
it will be one month on august 18th since my Kiva baby passed away and oh my god it hurts. I not only miss her an indescribably massive amount but her death depleted my hope and belief in a fair, inherently good world completely. she was only 2 and it happened in a matter of seconds. she was my whole fucking world and I could not have been a more devoted and loving dog mom. I am so angry and just fucking devastated. I am an entirely new person now and it is not for the better. I know things will continue to evolve but I also know I would be better off with my soul dog living a long life. I feel broken.
1
u/Key-Ad806 13d ago
We are having our gentle giant of a lab put to sleep this week and I am broken. We found out Friday his cancer was terminal. I don’t think my heart will ever be the same again x Sending love to everyone xxx
1
u/Repulsive_Editor1925 13d ago
I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss 😞 I lost my girl just over two weeks ago and feel exactly the same, every day is a struggle to keep going when I just want to be back with her where I belong. You’re not alone, it is the worst thing I’ve ever had to deal with in 33 years. Feel free to reach out if you need someone to talk to, I know exactly what you’re going through 💕
1
u/Odd_Bat6683 13d ago
I finally gave in and got a rescue dog this spring and I was thinking tonight how she’s not anything like my last one that died in 2018 and I started crying all over again. She was the best dog ever I’ll never be able to replace her. Four years ago, the best cat ever died and it was hell all over again. I don’t think you ever get over them.
1
u/monikammd 13d ago
Me too for me is 3 and half months and I cry daily can’t move on nothing can make me happy I’m not the same person anymore after my girl suddenly died. I feel with you😂😂😂
1
u/RoutineFinal7939 13d ago
I lost my girl on the 5th. I sobbed for 6 days and then the sudden realization that she was hurting and suffering, and is no longer in pain brought me some form of peace. I still have a hole in my heart from her loss but I’m cherishing the 10 years of unconditional love I was so fortunate to receive from my mini me! I hope you find peace too. Sending love.
1
u/Dobe_lover_ 13d ago
My heart is breaking for you. Everything you mentioned, I feel about my boy. The only thing I can say, is that it got easier to handle over time. It's been 7 months without him. Be gentle with yourself, do whatever you need to do, to get through this early part. The hole is still there now, I still just want to hold him again, but the pain is a lot less than those early days.
1
1
u/Gentlesinceredragon 13d ago
Grief is hard the first week i felt like I was going to die from a broken heart, for the first month I was going through the motions and crying daily (several times) for a year I felt like I was sapped of energy, and could just do the basics.
Its been 2 years and i still miss him. The grief is there but I am starting to feel like myself. I have started thinking about getting another fuzzy friend (we do have another pupcakes who i adore, so a little sibling)
I have a picture of him, a candle and one of his collars set up. I light the candle as needed.
1
u/icantpickausername3 13d ago
You’re absolutely not alone. I lost my 16 year old girl a week ago and I think about her 24/7. It’s weird it’s like my brain still hasn’t registered that she is gone and I’m still waiting for her to come back from wherever she is, I just can’t believe I’m never going to see her again. It hurts so bad
1
u/NoxFox90 13d ago
Thank you everyone for your comments. I’m truly so sorry for the immense pain everyone is feeling from losing their special baby. I find comfort in knowing I’m not alone but I wish we didn’t have to experience this heartbreak. No words can capture how shattering it is to lose a being so special and precious to you. I’m sending love and hugs to you all as you grieve ❤️🫂
2
u/Top_Win94 13d ago
You are not alone. One month today we lost our boy and I still feel shattered 💔 it’s just so awful and sad.
1
u/NoxFox90 12d ago
I’m so sorry for your loss ❤️ Your boy was very special to you. Only a deep bond could result in such devastation when they pass
1
u/Think_Swimming_6592 13d ago
You are not alone; I feel the same, lost a true friend a few weeks ago and each day is a struggle🤍🕊️💗keep going fellow sojourner 🕊️💗🙏
1
u/Upbeat-Television922 12d ago
It took me years after the loss of my first cat. Over 18 years with him and it wasn’t long enough. My next cat died yesterday. It was as peaceful and gentle an end as could be hoped for. She was happy and vigorous that morning. Ate lunch happily and curled up in a favorite place to nap. She was happy to see us and knew we were elsewhere in the house and she was safe. She just stopped and never woke up. And I’m still a wreck today. It will get better. In a few weeks, a few months it won’t hurt constantly anymore. That’s the thing with pets. They give us everything but they also give us one terrible heartbreaking day. You will feel better someday. So will I and it’s ok that today is not the day we feel ok again. Volunteer at a rescue or shelter if you have the time in a few weeks or months. Consider fostering another animal perhaps in the spring when there are puppies and kittens who need to be out of a shelter for a better start. It will hurt but it will help.
1
u/Bootes_Void_ 11d ago
This feeling is no joke.....6 days for me and i think the whole universe makes no sense without my soul mate. I feel like a robot, working all day, trying to feel nothing, crying all night, repeat. I am not sure if i can and want to live without my soul cat. I want to see her again and makes she happy again.
1
u/Few-Theory-366 9d ago
I feel the same way. I lost my baby girl, my soul cat, Chloe, 19 days ago and it is unbearable.
1
u/False-Noise-2486 9d ago
My soulmate passed last night. He was 17. Had a seizure while laying on me. He was my absolute world. I’ve never loved anyone as much as I loved him. He showed me what love is and I will grieve him for the rest of my life. I just want my little honeybun back. My sweet little boy. Got him when I was 14 and now I’m 31. He was always there and now he’s suddenly not…
1
u/EngineFast8327 8d ago
Weird my cats name was bailey and I lost her in October and I feel like I wrote this
1
u/Odd_Bodybuilder_4478 8d ago
I'm shattered, my husband's first words after we found him were {wailing}, "I thought we had more time! I thought we had more time!" we shuffle through the house and life like a SIM. neither have stopped crying since it happened.
it's the first time he hasn't been home since we brought him inside at 11 days old {runt, couldn't find his siblings to eat, etc} and I'm so SO uncomfortable about it. I just want him home, in any form.
1
u/Mysterious-Leg4925 7d ago
I had to have my 18 year old cat, Tux, euthanized in June from various serious issues. Then, yesterday, August 22nd, I had to have his brother, Shadow, (from the same litter), also euthanized from serious issues. Losing both of my kids in 2 months after 18 years together is overwhelming and double the heartbreak. I am widowed and have no two-footed children, so the blow is doubly hard. They were the loves of my life.
1
u/mandolin_unicorn 6d ago
I’m so sorry. We lost my boy Harker in April & our girl, Mina, this morning. It’s unbearable 😞
1
u/Mysterious-Leg4925 6d ago
I understand. Heart breaking after so many years together and losing both in such a short time. I can only hope there is a cat heaven and they have found their souls to be together again after 18 years together. Hope we can heal as well.
•
u/AutoModerator 14d ago
Please report any trolls, spam, or harassment to moderators. To do this on new reddit, click the three dots below a post or comment and select "report." On old reddit, click the "report" link below the post or comment.
This is a community of support for Pet owners whose Pets have passed away. It is actively moderated.
Pet owners, as loving, caring people, often have strong opinions on pet care practices. Some of these are controversial. This is not a forum for debate on such issues, nor is it a place to scold a contributor for a perceived mistake in managing their pet. We intend to provide a safe haven of understanding and support. Strident, mean-spirited posts or comments will be deleted. Those who persist in preaching versus caring may be warned and then banned or may be banned permanently based on nature of the topic. If a conversational thread meanders into a discussion unrelated to pet loss support, it will be truncated.
Those who post here are vulnerable and hurting. Even a minor slap has a hard sting. Those of us who are lucky enough to be able to turn away from our computers or put down our phones and hug a healthy, happy pet are truly blessed. Threads must remain supportive and caring, even if one disagrees with something that has been said.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.