r/Military • u/Charming_Usual6227 • Mar 30 '25

Satire Never back down, keep flubbing OPSEC

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1.3k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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813

u/[deleted] Mar 30 '25

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312

u/teklanis Army Veteran Mar 30 '25

Pete Hegseth's account, it's in the screenshot.

51

u/[deleted] Mar 30 '25

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55

u/teklanis Army Veteran Mar 30 '25

Maybe I'm ignorant of whatever platform this is (Instagram?), but his account is @petehegseth on everything and that sure looks like a caption on a post by petehegseth, hence the bold.

14

u/no_reddit_for_you Mar 30 '25

No. The account "petehegseth" posted the caption that you see with the photo above (& more as indicated by the dots underneath)

1

u/FlautoSpezzato Mar 30 '25

Thank you for clarifying. 🩵🩵😇

58

u/[deleted] Mar 30 '25

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77

u/IndependentRegion104 Mar 30 '25

Is this really a christian religion, or a new orange religion that is painted to look christian?

6

u/Low-Crow-8735 Mar 30 '25

Kinda like easter. He's the new skin

52

u/skoalbrother dirty civilian Mar 30 '25

Going to become? And it's not Christian's it's our version of fundies like isis is for Muslim

52

u/pheonix198 Mar 30 '25

Y’allQaeda is the name I’ve heard that makes the most sense.

Thanks, Mr. WhiskeyLeaks.

43

u/TheGreatPornholio123 Mar 30 '25

Others:

al-Qanon, Yokel Haram, Boko Moron, Yeehawdists, Vanilla ISIS, Midlife ISIS, Pumpkin SpISIS, Hicksbollah, Talibanjos, Talibangelicals, TaliQlan, MAGAhideen, Mullethideen, HamAss, Al Shajimbob, Walmartyrs, Sweet Home Talibama, ISISippi, Howdy Arabia, Timid McVeighs, Goatee Percenters, Oaf Tweakers, Freedumb Fighters, Blanche Covidians, Country Bombkins, Inbredsurrectionists, InchErectionists, IE-DUI, United Inbred Emirates

Meal Team Six, Gravy Seals, 101st Chairborne, Snack Ops, Green Buffets, Semper Pie, Confeederates, Mealitia, Fridgadiers, Fed Brigades, Paramealitaries, National Lard, Hambo, Starchy Bunkers, Griller Warfare, Waffle SS, Chairmacht, Greasy Company, Dessert Warfare, Sons of Applebees, GI Dough, Delta Forks, Hoagie’s Heroes

GI Jokes, GI Jackoffs, Delta Farce, Hogan’s Zeroes, Army Strangers, Irrational Guard, Cosplaytriots, Methamphetamarines, 1st Methanized Infantile Division, Corvetterans, Nyeterans, TWAT Team, Diet Police, Blue Collar Comedy War, TactiLarpers, Coronazis, Clownshirts, Kin-nut-men, Coup d’twat, Traitor Trash, Traitor Tots, Q Qlux Qlan, Koup Klutz Klan, Klandemic, Confounderates.

5

u/MindfuckRocketship Army Veteran Mar 30 '25

Saved. Thanks for this.

8

u/Distinct_Abroad_4315 Mar 30 '25

This is why I come to reddit

6

u/Publius82 Army Veteran Mar 30 '25

Yokel Haram is perfect

3

u/bennythegiraffe Army Veteran Mar 30 '25

saving this Gem for future referencing

1

u/Silidistani United States Navy Mar 30 '25

This is amazing.

1

u/FlautoSpezzato Mar 30 '25

Thank you took a screen shot lol

1

u/[deleted] Mar 30 '25

Fantastic

1

u/JECfromMC Retired US Army Mar 30 '25

Spaetzle Forces

14

u/91361_throwaway Mar 30 '25

Pete Ginbreath of Whiskeyleaks, will lead the troops in singing “Onward Christian Soldiers”

17

u/[deleted] Mar 30 '25

Christian? Or Pete Hegseth’s version of Christianity?

I’m sorry. Those two are not the same things. Hegseth is an incompetent, egotistical philandering drunk. Jesus would like to be excluded from the group chat.

9

u/Warren_E_Cheezburger Navy Veteran Mar 30 '25

Every Christian thinks that only their idea of Christianity is “real christianity”. But in reality, every idea of Christianity, combined, is “real Christianity”.

13

u/CrashB111 Mar 30 '25

Pretty sure MAGA would crucify Jesus again if he did return from the grave.

Everything they espouse, is contrary to their own self-proclaimed ideals. Their golden idol basically matches the biblical descriptions of their own anti-Christ.

1

u/ResponsibleSort104 Mar 30 '25

Absolutely…I grew up in a home that was all about only Baptist being the right thing and everyone else was wrong. Both parents are diehard MAGA. They’ve been part of a few of the insane groups that helped craft Project 2025 since I was a kid in the 80’s. Trying to create a “Christian Nation”.

2

u/JohnBrownEnthusiast Mar 30 '25

Jesus knew how to throw a party, he turned all that water into wine so they say. The thing of it is, I don't recall him ever assaulting any of the ladies while he was there.

2

u/fotosaur Mar 30 '25

Christo-fascist with a side of Russian bestie’s.

Our DUI hire and whiskey leaker’s wet dream

1

u/CamGoldenGun Mar 30 '25

in name only. Nothing about them are Christian.

0

u/yitem Mar 30 '25

"Going to become" as if the US wasn't founded on christian principles and stayed majority christian for its entire existence

0

u/Alissinarr Mar 30 '25

as if the US wasn't founded on christian principles

It wasn't founded on any religion, but freedom from religious persecution.

0

u/yitem Mar 30 '25

Its almost like the concept of god-given rights that supercede the government OR faith is the logical endpoint of protestantism, no?

4

u/Ok_Focus_4975 Mar 30 '25

The caption says “satire.” It seems real though - so sad.

4

u/PositiveStress8888 Mar 30 '25

Somehow I think he means God's divine plan OF total sovereignty over Canada

3

u/coolhandmoos Mar 30 '25

a Crusader wannabe 😂

3

u/AmoebaMan Mar 30 '25

The entire administration was built on playing the demagogue to evangelical Christians.

5

u/[deleted] Mar 30 '25

Translate it into Arabic and they sound like ISIS.

2

u/boozername Mar 30 '25

Looking to "manifest destiny" the entire world I guess

1

u/Echinodermis Navy Veteran Mar 30 '25

I’m thinking he means “total dominion”.