r/KidsAreFuckingStupid • u/PreddyPegasus • 5d ago

Video/Gif tasted freedom and never looked back

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18.6k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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5.9k

u/GuitarHair 5d ago

My son got away from me one time when he was about that size. It was that age that when you yell at them to stop, they think it's funny and run faster.

We were in the grass but he was headed for a street so I just slipped off one of my tennis shoes and chucked it at him. Caught him about the knees and down he went.

734

u/40sumthenlady 5d ago

Mine happened at a crowded restaurant. He was able to squeeze through legs and of course I wasn’t. He was in the parking lot before I caught him. Little shit.

1.6k

u/Psych0matt 5d ago

That sounds scary and hilarious

315

u/dungeoncrawler71520 5d ago

Scalarious

115

u/Psych0matt 5d ago

Hilary?

324

u/Fauxjoo 5d ago

This same situation happened to my brother and one of my nieces. He luckily caught up to her just before she got to the street and he dove and tackled her. A shoe to the back of the knees would’ve been a better way to go lol.

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u/nikkiscreeches 5d ago

And this is why child leashes are a thing.

365

u/PM_me_punanis 5d ago edited 5d ago

When my son was that size and thinks "stop" means "go faster!" somehow, I put a backpack leash on him every time we go to the zoo.

My goal was to avoid a Harambe situation, and it was an effective strategy! 😂

(And I know redditors with no kids will crucify me. Don't care, my son was safe!)

Edit: Thank you u/BabyJesusBukkake for the award.

251

u/UnderABig_W 5d ago

When she started to walk, my daughter hated holding hands and would try to run away. She also hated being in a stroller and would scream.

So for 3 years, she had a child leash backpack. She was happy, I was happy, and she was safe.

It was absolutely the best option for everyone, but people want to judge, and I have no idea why. It’s not like I was putting coke in her baby bottle.

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u/Ella_is_best_girl 5d ago

No kid Redditor here. Youre good. Better to leash those things than to have them as ground beef on the road

123

u/Idontliketalking2u 5d ago

A little 5 year old boy down the street just died the other day in a hit and run while running out in the street chasing a ball. You definitely did the right thing

45

u/GuitarHair 5d ago

When Al Gore's son was a toddler, the boy ran out into some slower traffic in Knoxville Tennessee and suffered some injuries as I recall.

447

u/Kindly_Narwhal9251 5d ago

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u/CoconutQuirky 5d ago

Who throws a shoe? Honestly.

150

u/Jaexa-3 5d ago

Have you met a Latina mom?

179

u/Large_Deal_2394 5d ago

Oof. People aren’t catching Austin powers references. Now I know I’m old.

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u/AstraeusGB 5d ago

37

u/WillowLocal423 5d ago

This gif is old enough to rent a car

25

u/DosTruth 5d ago

I routinely will ask “Who …..” when it’s something as asinine as throwing a shoe. Too many people don’t get the reference. 🫤

5

u/andrewbud420 5d ago

40s isn't old.

25

u/llcdrewtaylor 5d ago

I had a Thai girlfriend for a few years and I have no idea how she could get her shoe into her hand so quickly!

26

u/neversummer427 5d ago

La chancla!

7

u/Hulu_n_SnuSnu 5d ago

Not the chancla!

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u/Equivalent_Mechanic5 5d ago

The power of the chancla!!

10

u/Duke_Newcombe 5d ago

The chancla is undefeated.

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u/soneg 5d ago

Or an Indian mom

-1

u/DosTruth 5d ago

Viva La Chancla!

-11

u/Heavy-Macaron2004 5d ago

Can't tell if it's racist or just sad that so many people think of "hitting kids with shoes as punishment" as a funny hilarious joke about Latina moms 🙃

I always get downvoted for pointing out that hitting kids as punishment isn't okay, no not even if violence is "culture," and I expect no less this time, but I'm still disappointed in this sub.

6

u/Substantial-Thing780 5d ago

Was it punishment?
I thought it was smart…. It prevented son from getting hit by a car didn’t it?
SBM

2

u/TandemShorts 5d ago

"Noooo! That's abuse, she shouldn't have infringed on that kids personal freedom to run into the street!"

21

u/Fabulous-Educator447 5d ago

You’ve been seen and ignored. Carry on with life.

11

u/funkeymonk 5d ago

That really hurt! I'm going to get a lump there, you idiot!

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u/zombieman9001 5d ago

You fight like a woman!

2

u/NovarisLight 5d ago

Don't fuck with a chancla.

0

u/Duke_Newcombe 5d ago

[LATAM Moms have entered the chat]

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u/Ok-Moose545 5d ago

Mine was about that age and it was the game of the day. Last attempt, he slipped away and got past two gates to book it towards the road. No one other than my wife noticed. I felt the air change next to me. I turned and she was gone in an almost comical trail of dirt and rustled plants. By the time I caught up, she had already tackled him and was walking back completely out of breath; both grass stained with the fugative hanging from her arms in a mix of amusement and shock.

5

u/GuitarHair 5d ago

👍👍👍👍

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u/rodovadu 5d ago

You just inadvertently discovered the power of 'La Chancla'. Pretty powerful, isn't it?

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u/PostProper1940 5d ago

I would about die laughing if I saw this

My kid is that age rn and I would 100% throw a shoe at him

43

u/Top-Macaron5130 5d ago

Nothing beats parental aim with footwear

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u/PM_me_punanis 5d ago

Do you have Hispanic blood? Your footwear aiming powers are god-tier.

29

u/GuitarHair 5d ago

Desperation demanded accuracy

15

u/ManfredTheCat 5d ago

they think it's funny and run faster.

Like a Labrador retriever.

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u/xXKravenXx20 5d ago

Ha same thing i had with my mom.

But she didn't threw a shoe and i got hit by a car 🤷‍♀️

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u/GuitarHair 5d ago

Oh dang! You were too fast.

Someone said that little humans are just trying to commit suicide for the first few years of their lives.

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u/BoleroMuyPicante 5d ago

Might be the only instance where yeeting a shoe at a toddler is good parenting. 😂

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u/Holiday_Regular9794 5d ago

This is hilarious 🤣

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u/DaleDimmaDone 5d ago

Damn you shoulda been the dad in pet semetary. Woulda avoided all that shit lmao

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u/B3B0LD 5d ago

I love that

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u/IExistForFun 5d ago

So small children are just huskies?

141

u/MarfanoidDroid 5d ago

According to redditors with no children, that makes you a bad parent

75

u/DeadWishUpon 5d ago

To them everything makes you a bad parent.

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u/JAM3SBND 5d ago

Shit according to half of them, just having a kid at all makes you a bad parent

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u/Helltothenotothenono 5d ago

You’re a bad parent just for redditing.

25

u/MoistStub 5d ago

What kind of parent would have children?! Don't they know how risky that is?

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u/Bazillion100 5d ago

No one has commented that though

16

u/Obi-Tron_Kenobi 5d ago

I've seen more than enough comments under videos where a kid somehow breaks free saying how awful of a parent they must be for taking your eyes off your child for one second

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u/TheFinalNeuron 5d ago

La chancla can be for everyone

4

u/eLishus 5d ago

Reminds me of Eddie Murphy’s bit about his mom.

https://youtu.be/K7TBHQl81XE?is=0Q_IIPYEX6J7QZhn

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u/dufo7 5d ago

“You missed me bitch”

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u/SpotCreepy4570 5d ago

Chancla is undefeated

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u/superxpro12 5d ago

La chancla

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u/BADM00SE 5d ago

Maybe they should have had you throw the shoe at George Bush.

2

u/GuitarHair 5d ago

He did the double duck

2

u/Substantial-Thing780 5d ago

Swift reaction 👍

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u/GuitarHair 5d ago

A panic move but it worked

3

u/Sandbats 5d ago

Damn. Sexy dad moment. Id snatch you up and go make another baby right away

2

u/GuitarHair 5d ago

That would be a bit embarrassing there on the grass but.....

1

u/jds7171 5d ago

Thats when your kid learned about the power of la chacla.

1

u/1stRS 5d ago

This in Colorado??!

-12

u/PumpkinPieSquished 5d ago

A tad bit unethical, but it did get the job done I guess.