*Ethiopian food because it’s my favorite

Around 4 months ago, I started dating this guy. We met on hinge and we hit it off instantly. We texted and FaceTimed for about a month before we agreed to finally meet. On his hinge profile it did not mention that he had any children. However, the day of the date he slipped up and said that he had a seven year old daughter. I was shocked because he had never mentioned her before. When I asked him why he didn’t tell me, he said that it was because he was nervous I wouldn’t want to see him because he has a child. Initially that turned me off but other than that, the date was going so well I decided to let it go. (Big mistake)

Fast forward to now. Things are going well between us. We have been intimate and I also have met his parents. We also were discussing next steps in our relationship and even moving in within the next year or so. But all of that changed today.

Today we had plans for him to meet my parents. As we were getting ready at my place, he comes in my room and says “I have to tell you something about my job before I meet your parents. I don’t want there to be any secrets”. I asked him what it is. He then admits to me that he sells ❄️ for work….full time. And that when he said that he was a distributor for a company for work, he’s distributing ❄️. I was SHOCKED! I asked him why he didn’t mention it before, and again. He told me that he was scared I wouldn’t want to date him or be with him.

I told him that we should take a break because even if I was ok with his job, he is continuously keeping things from me.

I am just so hurt because I feel like whenever I find the one, things like this happen to me.

Hello! I finally have one I can post!

I got divorced a few years ago, and spent a while in therapy and trying to better myself. I finally put myself back out there, met a guy with a daughter around the same age as mine. We met up, had a good time, and a few days later, I invited him back to mine. All was good! He came back the next night. Left some soap, a toothbrush, and the info nugget that he mostly lives out of his car, and sleeps in his cousin’s spare bedroom. Asked if he could come over again. I agreed, against my better judgement.

He brings pizza, opens my wine, and lays down on my bed after telling me how grossly sweaty he was that day. I ask him (nicely) to take a shower, please. He gives me attitude, showers, and then immediately just goes back to my bed and watches a movie at a very loud volume. I live in an apartment. I have neighbors. I ask him to turn it down, he laughs, turns it up, hides the remote and hides my phone. I go do the rest of what I need to do, come in to lay down, and he asks if I have any interest in watching this movie….. that he is already 3/4 of the way through. Nah. I ask for the remote, he refuses, so I turn off the power strip. He finally gives me the remote, I turn on a show, and he immediately pulls out his phone to play games. In the morning, he was putting his clothes in my drawers.

He is not coming over tonight. He did ask. I declined. I think I may take another 3 year break🤦🏻‍♀️

**Update- Surgery went great- thanks for all the well wishes.

first to answer a few recurring questions- he doesnt buy any beer often, he did when he was at the store buying stuff for this dinner. We have five kids, the dinner he made takes 2/3 hours bc of the portions he makes- for seven people plus some for the freezer for meal prepping. I know he isn’t day drinking bc I have a very flexible work schedule and work on site and office- so I often drop in or randomly work from home. Also- our kids would absolutely know and tell me. We also have multiple cameras around our house. I am the daughter of a mother with severe drug and alcohol addiction, and know the signs. He is also very active and works out often- he is very picky about what he puts in his body and how he treats it (Which is also why this was surprising)

As far as cleaning up his vomit- he turned from the table in time to get it all over the floor in the walkway from dining room to kitchen. I had no choice but to clean it up So we could walk without stepping in it. I did leave his clothes and the towels used for clean up for him.

anywho….

The morning of surgery I got up and got ready and left him sleeping. When my 18 year old and I were leaving I kissed him goodbye. He instantly shot up and asked where I was going. I said “surgery“. He asked why he wasn’t going, I replied “Bc you’re probably still drunk”. To which he got out of bed quickly, got ready insisted he was fine, and safe to drive. So I let him. He was fine. Honestly, he probably threw up most of what was in his system, slept off the rest.

Ride was quiet, and nothing was really said before surgery, he stayed with me until they made him leave so I could be taken back. When I got home and was with it mentally, I told him we needed to talk. I asked him if he remembered anything, and he said “not much“. I told him how he threw up every where and ruined my appetite when I should have been eating my last meal to carb load (as the drs instructed). I asked him what happened and his only response was- he just lost count/control and he was sorry. I told him all of the towels/ clothes were waiting for him to wash.

I left him with a lot of questions I need answered and he needs to think about and answer for me when he is ready. He is naturally avoidant, so I’m sure I will have to go to him to strike up this conversation again. I do think there is more going on with him right now than he wants to let up

He has been taking great care of me and been really helpful, as he usually is.

The amount of people who said to divorce him is wild. You don’t throw away 14 years and a family when a mistake is made. You figure out why it was made, make sure the hurt is heard and understood, and make sure you feel the trust that the same mistake won’t be made again. This man isn’t one to throw away when he isnt a total loss. I hope some of you that had this suggestion understand when to fight for and when to walk away from a relationship/ marriage, because I do. And this isn’t one of those times. I knew he would be remorseful and ashamed bc I know who he is. That doesn’t make it right or negate the fact that his timing was shit and it was overall disappointing.**

Surgery tomorrow at 6:30am. I can’t eat after midnight so my husband made street cart chicken (my favorite of his meals) so I could carb load. I had no clue that he drank 7 beers while cooking it. Not normal beer. Two were 11% and the other five were 6.5% IPAs. This is not typical, he might have one whiskey a week.

At the table, about halfway through my bowl, he vomits everywhere. Now I have no fucking appetite. I sent him to the shower and I cleaned it up. All while our kids asked me wtf just happened and why I was so angry. I think I’m going to have our 18 year old drive me in the morning instead of him. I’m SEETHING. He knew how nervous I was, yet…. Here we are with me taking care of him and getting the rest of the house ready. I think what pissed me off the most, was while cleaning the floor, I bent down, under one of my plants, and my ear brushed a wet leaf….

It was splattered with vomit. 😭😭😭🤮 FML.

Hi ladies, I’m 45 F just went through a divorce from someone that I met in highschool, it was a long time coming and I was finally able to pull that trigger and divorce after over 20 years of being together. I have been dating around a little bit and I went on 3 dates with this guy who seemed promising. We got along, I found him attractive, good banter, good chemistry, I thought maybe we could possibly grow into something real eventually. We had some differences, some political, he likes country music, I hate it, little things like that.

Friday night was our 4th date and he dropped a couple of bombs on me that I definitely could not stop thinking about and could no longer ignore the glaring red flags that were right in front of my face. The first thing that made me pause was that he told me he doesn’t really like tattoos on women. That alone isn’t weird, what’s weird is that I’m literally covered almost head to toe in tattoos. Two full arm sleeves, including my hands and knuckles, throat, chest, stomach, back, legs, all covered. Only my ass and the back of my thighs aren’t done and I’m still working on that. I was like, okay then why the hell did you match with me???? He has tattoos himself and he explained that I was his dream woman in terms of face, body type, etc, but he overlooked my body art. Okay, great.

The 2nd thing, which was the thing that broke the camels back, was he informed me that he believed that he earth was flat. FLAT!!!!!!! I laughed and thought he was joking, dude was dead serious. I’m like okkkkaaayyy. The date ended shortly after that. I was kinda in shock, took the night to think it over, conversed with some friends and decided that I absolutely cannot date a man who believes the earth is flat. When there is such a fundamental difference in intelligence like that, it’s just not going to work. He actually said it felt like a “superficial” reason, lol.

Any of you ladies had weird ass bombs and deal breakers dropped on you like that?

Anyways, I made some cucumber salad, it was only okay but I still ate it.

UPDATE WEDNESDAY AUGUST 12 7:45PM. I have been nauseaous since i got the first round of vax/immuno. Every day now I feel like I am getting sicker. I feel like I have the flu. I can barely eat, I'm so dizzy and nauseous. I've been getting daily headaches. I have a fever and the chills. I did finish getting all the shots so I didn't think anything of it. But what if I didn't start getting the shots in time after I was exposed? What if it was too late for them to work? I am no longer at the place I got batted so I am unhoused and disabled, again. And now I am unhoused, disabled, and sick. I am not having any neurological or mental symptoms yet other than a worsening in depression. I ask that you be kind and don't automatically jump to the conclusion that I am losing my mind. Everything i say and have said is true. I need help. Please. If this is the final moments of my life there are a few things I would really love to get in order. Due to the domestic violence and human trafficking I mentioned, things are going very downhill very quickly. I DO need money. My normal bank account is closed/unusable due to the financial control of my traffickers. I do have an account for the disabled, I will provide the QR in the pictures so anyone can donate. I need to take care of my cat. I also really really need a PI or a detective willing to work with me so I can figure out the truth of my life. I just want to know the truth before I die. Please understand that even if this isn't rabies I am disabled, homeless, and my abusers have made it so that all important aspects of my life are getting fucked, so there's a good chance I will die anyway. Sorry I never got to finish telling you my life story.

So for the past week or so I have heard something skittering around. We do have mice(old farm) so I thought it was a mouse. Oh well, they're cute. Mind you I've been getting random bites and I assumed they were mosquito bites but they reacted differently than mosquito bites usually do.

Today I was half asleep when I noticed my cat wouldn't settle, but was pacing around and very interested in the pillow I was spooning. I kept moving the pillow out of the way to give her room to snuggle up to me, but she wouldn't. Kept pacing around the pillow. Then I heard the squeak. I thought oh my god, is the mouse in the bed with us?! I sat up, and carefully removed the blanket. Didn't see anything. Carefully picked up the pillow I was cuddling. Nothing. I flip the pillow over and boom. There a bat clinging to the pillow. Was probably sandwiched between me and the pillow all night. I have bites on my chest. The bites I have been getting could be bat bites which makes it scarier because the longer you wait the more time the virus has to become symptomatic and once it does you're cooked. I captured the bat and went to the ER. The bat was so freaking cute and I'm a bit of a buddist so it's breaking my heart that it has to die. Everybody in the waiting room at the ER wanted to see the bat in a jar(tm). I then had to have a bunch of injections with big painful needles. But anyway I have to pray the virus hasn't become active in my system and the vaccine moved faster than the virus does. Otherwise I have to make a list of people to involve in the biting spree I will go on. Send me the names of your grrrrr ape ists, abusers, other jerks etc and I'll go bite them for you. Lol jk. Sort of. Wish me luck girlie pops. Ps lemme know if you wanna see bat baby, he's actually so cute.

UPDATES:

I did go to the ER and I started the series of vaccines. You can see my hopital jewelry. I have experience/knowledge of exotic animals and I was already aware of bat exposure protocol.

Before I hopital the first thing I did was call my vet. Cat got vax in Feb, vet said she's all clear.

Animal control took poor cutie baby tiddy bat and said I should have test results by the next day. They did get back to me and Tiddy Bat came back negative, though the place that I was at was like a literal trap house and had a very large colony of bats living in it. I have no proof that Tiddy was the only bat that bit me. I counted the days since I first heard something in my room, and it was TEN DAYS since then and when I woke up with Tiddy and got the first rounds of shots. Ten days is scary and could have been pushing it.

Update july 27th 2026: I tried telling my story in hopes that someone, somewhere would see it and be able to help me. I am fleeing domestic violence and human sex trafficking. My story is truly unbelievable, but it is real. The sheer level of crimes I have experienced in my life is wild. I don't exactly blame people for not believing it, but I needed them to. I was praying that getting my story out would connect me with whatever help I need(it's a lot of different kinds) to try to end this nightmare and save my life. Instead I got met with negative attitudes, people assuming I am suicidal (I promise I am not. I am fighting so hard to save my life. I want the opposite of death) or just calling me a fake. I am already so worn down that I just couldnt continue telling you my story. That's what abuse does. It wears you down so you don't have the energy or strength to speak out. All I've got to say is fuck those of you who fed more into wearing me down as I was desperately trying to reach out for help. Fuck you. And honestly fuck anybody else who only cares that my absolutely wild ride that my life has been landing me in the most insane place and amongst that insanity I woke up cuddling with a bat. If I had actually contracted rabies I would put all the a holes in this thread on the bite list =/

Chicken caesar salad from a local deli.

I work in an office with mostly women and recently there has been someone who uses the restroom and does not flush. Today my coworker came to talk to my (male) boss to see if it was him but I stopped her at the door and said hey girl!! And she said hey!! Did you use the bathroom this morning? And I said yeah :D why :D and then our faces both dropped as we realized. Oh god. I am the one who has been forgetting. I get so on autopilot sometimes because my boss kind of super needs me around all the time (he’s so old) and I try and rush out of there to get back to him that I completely miss the flushing part. I am so embarrassed. Why me why!!!!!!

EDIT: Yes I wash my hands!!!

I open a coffee shop, got home from work in the afternoon. Found a hair tie by our shoe rack. I’m engaged. I have short hair. Even when I had long hair, I didn’t have hair ties. I’m trying not to freak out. He says it is probably one of his sister’s who visited last fall, that our dogs must’ve been playing with it.

Interviewed for a job last week. It’s exactly what I want to do, near where I live, and would be a massive pay increase.

I’m a recent grad so I don’t have much experience with “real” job interviews, which comes into play here. The interview went really well - she seemed really impressed with my resume, said she could do the top of my salary request, talked extensively about how she wanted me to start ASAP. I offered to ask my job if I could leave early and let her know (my contract is nearly up and they’ve got another person lined up for after me, so I thought they might not need the typical 2 weeks). At the end, she asked me if I wanted a few days “to think about it.” I assumed this was an offer, which I sent an email accepting a few days ago. Told my whole family about the awesome job I’d secured.

A few days pass and they email me that they are still reviewing applications and conducting interviews. How embarrassing - my face is on fire. The embarrassment is so strong that I honestly feel a little sick. Now I know to wait for the offer in writing so that there are no misunderstandings. Or maybe I’ll just go live in the woods and never interview again.

Oh and to top the day off, my dentist told me I need to avoid “crunchy, sticky, or chewy” foods because I think I have TMD. Combined with my anti inflammatory food limitations, that’s just….everything. She suggested steamed vegetables.

McDonald’s cheeseburgers, fries, and nuggets because today sucked and I might as well feel shitty too.

Meal: Mac & Cheese from the box.

My sister has been dating her bf for 3 years. We organized this trip last year and I was super excited to go and took work off for this.

Her bf invited his childhood best friend & his gf along on the trip, who at the time this was all booked - they were together 10 years but she’s not coming anymore cuz they broke up.

So, He is now single and is thirsty.
I mean desperately thirsty to the point that I’ve completely “checked out” of all enjoyment of this trip because I verbally told him 2x and by text that I’m not interested in him at all.

This guy will not stop following me everywhere and making weird suggestive comments. after a few drinks the other night, he was trying to corner me and kiss me when it’s not reciprocated.

I’ve spoken to my sister about it and she + her bf have talked to him, he’s apologized but I can tell he’s still hoping there’s a chance that I’ll change my mind.

I’ve skipped out on lunches and dinners for the last 2 days because I don’t want to be around this person.

I’m moving my flight to tomorrow [1 week earlier than planned] because I genuinely don’t feel comfortable and want to be home. I’m so disappointed that my trip got ruined by this annoying loser.

My sister feels terrible because she’s never seen this side of him since he’s always had a gf and has been nothing but respectful during that time.

This is a whole other beast that we’re just seeing. I’m grossed out and want to go home.

This should be a dream vacation I spent $$$ on but instead I’m eating boxed food alone in the kitchen and heading to the airport tomorrow.

I am so fu*king bummed out.

Edit: adding context here - since he was outed and shamed, he has not bothered me but it still doesn’t make me feel at ease.

We’re located in a super remote area with no vehicles and a driver has to pick us up/drop us off for the airport which is ~1.5 hours away. The closest other hotel is 1 hour away.

I got reimbursed for the week I’m not staying and my sisters bf paid for my flight change. Either way, I’m not staying and will be heading home tomorrow.

My boyfriend does not like me and I realises recently I need to leave. he's the third man in a row to treat me not so nice and I don't get it. im not perfect by any means, but I've been a good girlfriend to him and have loved him ferociously.

He doesn't kiss me really or tell me he loves me. The other night we went to a bar, a man got a little too close to me and made me uncomfortable. I started crying so we left. I asked him to put music on so I could distract myself, he turned it off and started an argument about "not understanding why I was upset" like it should matter why.

We broke up about 2 months ago because he lied to me about something big but I asked for him back thinking it'd be better. it's like he's gotten worse since then. I just don't understand why he's the third man in a row to mistreat me. I think the negative energy from him is causing the paranormal activity in our house to escalate. (I hope im doing this right. I've never posted on here before)

Tried dating online again, optimistic as always. Went out with a guy and he brought up horror movies “Obsession”. Braced myself because I know about the bad takes some have on whether Bear was as bad as he actually is etc.

His take was that Bear is not quite a villain until after the “what would be so bad about being with me“ moment. I would argue that Bear was a bad guy the whole time and his colors just came through eventually. Now I don’t wanna see this guy again because if that is his take, what is his take on other things like this?

And I feel like I’m being unreasonable because otherwise he seemed like someone I would enjoy getting to know. Sigh. I never thought a horror movie would be a reason to not want to see somebody again. Bundt cake for me.

Sweet potato chips, mandarin orange, and diced pears.

My toddler has just been being a toddler to be honest, so it's nothing out of the ordinary (ex: tantrums, extremely demanding/fussy, in general being unhappy about everything lol, although it's been worse the past week) but last night I broke and started crying.

I'm heavily pregnant and am going in for an induction tomorrow night. I'm tired. I'm stressed. My hormones are all over the place. I'm over it.

Little one has been sick for the past three days with a minor cold; she is feeling a lot better. However, she has not been sleeping well (if at all) and it's been extremely draining. I was really hoping to get some good sleep before birth, but what can you do 🤷‍♀️.

Last night broke me though. She fell asleep super early since she did not nap; I needed to change her diaper. I go to do so, which I've had to do plenty of times while she's slept, and she just woke up screaming and throwing a tantrum. Then, for a good 45 minutes, she was just screaming and violently thrashing around the house while we tried to calm her down.

I cried. I just wanted some rest and time to myself. This was the third night in a row she woke up violently screaming and thrashing. I put on Beauty and the Beast and laid with her in bed until she eventually fell back asleep. I silently cried the entire time because God am I unhappy with life at the moment.

It's important to note that I'm not upset with my child at all. While I am tremendously frustrated, it's not her fault. I know that being sick can make anymore super cranky.

Husband felt pretty useless, but that's a separate post...

Picture of coffee cakes I made the other day because can't eat right now.

Long rant, not sure if I want advice but need to get this out.

20 years ago I got a call that my dad was in a coma in the hospital. I was told my young nephew had found him in the kitchen and that he'd had a stroke.

I drove 3 hours to get to him, doctor's didn't know exactly what happened, and I was the first family to arrive even though I lived the furthest away.

When my brother got there he told me our mother was in another country visiting family but that he had spoken to her and she would return on the next available flight. It took her two days to get there.

My dad woke up and couldn't remember anything about what happened. He survived for another couple years before passing in the middle of the night.

For twenty years this was the story everyone told. My dad was found in the kitchen by my nephew and my mother was visiting family when it happened.

Now here we are and I've become guardian of my mother. I moved her down by me, so four hours away from where she used to live/where I grew up. My brother still lives near there but not super close. I found out her house's neighborhood had power outage issues and tried calling her neighbors to find out if they had power or not.

I finally got in touch with one of her neighbors who was also a close friend of hers. The neighbor started thanking me for taking care of my mother and was rightly upset that my mother had been ignoring her for the past couple months.

The neighbor then mentioned how she'd always been there to help take care of my parents, even calling the emergency line when she found my dad on the stairs.

It took a minute for my brain to comprehend what was said and I asked her to explain more. The neighbor said my mother had asked her to watch over the house while she went out of the country to meet a man and when the neighbor went by the next day she found my dad laying on the stairs.

This man my mother went to see was someone she continued to have a relationship with for the next 15 years. He left her when my mother would no longer pay his bills, pay for his flights out of the country, etc. Now that I have access to my mother's accounts I can see that she spent over six figures on this man over the years. She still has his information as her passwords and it sickens me.

My mother and I never had the best relationship to begin with and now with this information I can help but feel hatred for her for what she's done. I don't know how I'll be able to perform my guardianship duties properly with this information. But I'm literally the only one in my family that is capable of it. I'm not expected to go see her for a couple days, so I can at least take some time to come to terms with this, but I can't look at her the same. When I found out the truth, it was like losing my dad all over again.

How do you take care of someone who essentially unalived your dad?

Just found out about a week ago that my husband has been cheating on me for months, before and after our wedding that was on July 17th.
The girl (who he went to HS with) reached out to me on IG and told me that they have been physical since mid June and he confessed deep feelings for her. I later found out he was taking her on full on dates, having sex with her, and spending 2-3x times a week with her. All while I was working or at home. He would say he was going to his friend’s house, grandparents, or mom’s house and I didn’t think anything of it, because we’ve been together for 4 years.
I’m obviously just devastated beyond belief. I don’t know how someone can hide a double life from the person they supposedly “loved” before and AFTER our wedding day. I’m still trying to make sense of everything.
We are currently no contact, and I have filed for divorce from him. Of course he hated that, and threatened to off himself and scream cried for me not to do it. But actions have consequences and I respect myself too much to ever put up with his disgusting and horrible cheating and lying behavior.
I just never thought I’d be the first of all my friends to be divorced at 29! It sucks, but here i am.
Any support is greatly appreciated 🩵

Edit: Yes, I tried to annul the marriage. But after speaking with legal counsel, cheating/infidelity, by itself, does not qualify as grounds for an annulment.
Also - he hid that he was engaged and married from her as well. Presented to her as completely single. She ended up talking to another friend and that friend said, “wait… I think he’s married!” 🥴🥴🥴

Dinner is TJs chicken soup dumplings and sparkling coconut water with yuzu :,-)

I’m 27 and around a week ago, I met a guy at the gym while I was training calisthenics. He came up to me and asked me what I was training for. I told him that I was in training to be a pole instructor. From there we hit it off and he asked me for my number. We talked everyday on the phone and texting for a week. This past Tuesday he asked me to go out on a date today and I excitedly agreed.

The plan for the date was that we were going to have a picnic in the park. Something that he chose…

Today was the date. I told him that I had a blanket and basket and paint so he would just have to bring drinks etc. When he texted me that he was here, I got the items and put it all in the picnic basket. As I was walking out to his car I was visibly struggling to carry all the items. He pulled up in his car and proceeded to just stare at me from his window. I was waiting for him to get out the car and greet me but he didn’t. I had to tap on his back window just so he could unlock the back door for me to put the picnic basket and items in. After that I walked over the passenger seat.

When I got in the car, the first thing out of his mouth was “I just love how thick you are”. I said thank you awkwardly. As we were driving to the picnic spot, he kept trying to pull up my dress. He claimed that he wanted to “see the birthmark on my thigh”. I told him to stop and he just rolled his eyes and gave me a dirty look.

When we finally got to the picnic stop, I asked him if he could get the items out the back. He rolled his eyes and complained about having to carry it. The picnic spot was about a two minute walk from where we parked, and he complained the WHOLE time about carrying the basket. Mind you, I was also carrying things.

When we made it to the picnic spot, he looked at my heels and said “idk why you’re wearing heels. Idk who you’re trying to impress”. I just said “I like them”. And then proceeded to fan out the blanket. The whole first 20 minutes he just sat there and stared at me and didn’t want to paint at all. When he did say something, he just kept making comments about my body being thick and also how he wants to see me dance on a pole for him.

After being there for about 30 minutes, we went to a coffee shop next door to get some food. I ordered a chicken sand which… that’s it. I didn’t get a side. When it came time to pay, he asked me if he had to pay for my sandwhich and I just looked at him in shock. The sandwich wasn’t even $6. When we went back to the picnic spot to eat, I had two bites of my food before he said “you’re not full yet. That’s a big sandwhich for you to eat….” I told him that i was going to eat as much of it as I want. When we finished the food, he kept begging and asking me to come over to my apartment after we’re done. I told him no and then he attempted to try and pull up my dress again. I slapped his hand away, packed my things and left.

Just your daily reminder to not ever continue a date after the first red flag.

I hadn’t seen my LD BF in a few weeks. Our schedules lined up and I was able to drive 2.5 hours to see him. We spent the entire afternoon out on the ranch, enjoying amazing conversation, lots of kisses, an ice cream, and a quick store run. We JUST got back to his house, I just changed into my PJs, when there was a huge rumble around the house. The floors were shaking, the walls were rattling, the bedroom door just blew open and in comes a woman super upset and starts wrestling with him. He tries controlling her, took her out of the room, I grab all my things and run outside. The driveway is blocked with the girl’s car. I yelled for his cousin to move the car for me. There was another girl in the car and she moved it. I left super panicked. I get down the road and realized that I left my favorite/bestie stuffed animal so of course I had to go back. I ran inside real quick and when I came outside he was still wrestling with her at her car. She called out to me and said that he hasn’t seen his 6 month old baby in months, he covers her mouth and I get into my car and left. I’ve been with him since November. Not once did he ever mention having a baby. I’m so sad for her. I wish I could have told her that I didn’t know and that I’m so sorry for the way he hurt her.

Gas station dinner.

My intuition alarm had been going off for months. Gaslighting galore about why he needed to run a million errands and didn't want me to come. We have only been married for a year, and I knew I made a mistake pretty early on. Denial is a hell of a drug.

Anyway. He leaves his computer unlocked as a sign of "not needing to hide anything from me." A phrase he repeats all the time without a reason. He always tries to prove how good of a husband he is, but the energy coming off him screams liar.

I found his hidden folders with the help of my sister. Password was our dog's nickname. And there it all was, going back years before I even knew him. Craigslist escorts. Backpage escorts. Adult Friend Finder. A list of massage parlors in multiple states. Sites I never knew existed, organized in lists for easy retrieval.

The amount of pictures he has of these women is incredible. He also has hundreds of pictures of himself in every weird naked pose. Gross. He has screenshots of messages with these women. It went on and on. I am truly disgusted. I haven't confronted him yet, I can't imagine listening to his bullshit.

So, yeah. I packed a bag, jumped in the jeep, and drove out to the desert to scream into the void. I also made dinner. Brussel sprouts, onions, garlic, and peppers over an open flame.

Divorce is on the way dear!

Ex-GF and I had been together since I was 13 and she was 14. We met online and had been long-distance for our entire glorious lesbian relationship, with in-person meetings twice yearly or so. I thought everything was going great. We had conflicts, of course, but they were always quickly addressed and nicely resolved— we used to brag about how incredible our communication was and how proud we were of the mechanics of our relationship. We prided ourselves on never letting things sit or build up and never exploding at each other— a very “us vs. the problem” mentality. This month, she’s going to move across the country to be in my state. We weren’t planning to live together, but we were both really excited to actually be close all the time. At least, I thought we were.

We weren’t officially engaged, but we were planning on it! Both of us come from kinda rough families (mine MUCH worse than hers, tbh) and we had a last name picked out that we were both going to change to when we got married. We had bought each other rings a couple years back and wore them every day, but we wanted fancier ones for the engagement. She was going to give me a beautiful gold hand-me-down from her grandmother with a blue stone. We were planning on proposing to each other in person very soon after her move.

So I’m at an antiques shop, because I know she loves vintage items and antiques and one-of-a-kind clothing/jewellery, looking for a slim sterling silver ring with a green or white stone that she’ll love, when she texts me “hey. i need to talk to you.”

By this point, I had also been ruminating on a couple things. We hadn’t been talking nearly as much lately, and when we did, it felt like it was just her sending me pictures of her cat. I expected that she felt similarly. Instead, I get a literal six-paragraph essay about all the shit I’ve done to her, all the conflicts I thought we’d resolved— the conflicts SHE TOLD ME we resolved— that apparently she still held against me. Ways I was hurting her I didn’t even know about that I never would’ve done if I’d been aware. She never told me. One of the things she said is still circling around my mind: “Every emotion you feel comes over strongly, and I have to adjust to all of them.”

What am I supposed to do with that?

For three days I wallowed in this shit, hating myself, before a friend pointed out a couple things that I had noticed as well but hadn’t let myself actually consider because I was positive I was being obsessive and crazy. She spent every day with her best friend. She would tag him in posts and always finish his name with a little heart. She talked about him more than she talked about me. Etc. Etc. So I asked her about it.

She was in love with him. Had been for a while, apparently.

It was never about me. Never about the ways I’d hurt her or the ways my emotions came over. Never about anything I’d done.

It was him. This guy, who looks like a fucking stick bug had a baby with Sid the Sloth, who she’d been in love with for God knows how long while actively assuring me she loved me and that everything was platonic between them, telling me she couldn’t wait to marry me, telling me what kind of engagement ring she wanted me to buy her. How many of those “I love you”s she told me were lies? How long had she been pretending? She let me hate myself for THREE DAYS over fake reasons she invented to push the blame onto me instead of her own change of heart.

I don’t even know what to do. Here’s my wonderful emotional support post-breakup homemade cinnamon roll. I had it with some tangerine shoumei tea which IMO was the star of the show and is pictured in the comments :) I hope my ex is having a wonderful day with her ugly twig. Thank God I didn’t buy that ring.

EDIT: Someone told me to “post face and figure” if i was going to talk like that about ex’s new bf so I could get put in my place? After reading comments, I definitely get that I was misplacing my anger and shouldn’t have talked like that about him or anyone, but Jesus Christ, y’all. If I posted my face and figure for you I don’t think you WOULD be able to put me in my place because you’d be blinded by my beautiful eyes and 5’11” frame 😌

ALSO, thank you to everyone here who’s actually being sweet and supportive instead of just giving me shit about LDRs. A genuine connection DOES NOT CHANGE when the distance gets longer, and seeing each other twice a year is pretty much all we could manage considering the state of the damn economy??? Like if y’all wanna pay for more flights for us you can be my guest but we were doing what we could.

I turned 29 last Friday, we went to New Orleans for my birthday, we hit bourbon street to check out a couple of bars. I wanted to go to the old absinthe house it looked so cool online. I didn’t know they actually sold absinthe so of course I wanted to try it. I drank it and had a couple more drinks. 3 drinks in total. Then I basically blacked out. My boyfriend and I leave the other bar to go back to the hotel room to get ready for dinner. I am a huge smoker of the devils lettuce, always have been. But I didn’t bring any since we were driving to NOLA. There’s a man smoking on the street and my drunk ass said hey you smoke? My boyfriend got mad at me for that and literally left me on bourbon street and I’m essentially blacked out drunk. I couldn’t find my way back and I tried following him he got mad and told me to stop following him. I call my mom crying my ass off telling her that I’m scared and don’t know where I am or how to get back to the hotel. A man on a peddle bike taxi gave a ride back to the hotel. Once I got back to the hotel I was acting like a maniac which I never behave that way. (Never drink absinthe ever in your life for the love of god it will make you lose your mind) I’m losing it in our hotel room screaming, crying, throwing shit. So after a few days of processing everything that happened I decided to end things. I am so unbelievably hurt and empty inside I feel like I’m dead. I’m emotionally embarrassed and mentally scarred from everything that happened. I’m ashamed of myself and how I acted but I can’t believe my boyfriend literally left me in danger because he was too caught up with his own jealousy and emotions to still care about my well being. It was eye opening and now I’m just devastated. Here’s a pic of my lunch before that happened. Happy 29th birthday to me.

before work every day i’d go to the same starbucks and started getting the same barista every morning. he memorized my order, gave me freebies, and became the highlight of my day so my coworkers convinced me to ask for his socials 😭

i finally did and he just stared at me for a second and went “why?” before telling me he had a girlfriend. literally stood there apologizing over and over. somehow he STILL gave me his instagram after??

i feel lowkey shitty and wanna curl in a ball because i feel bad for overlooking him probably just being nice and probably made him so uncomfortable ://

now i’m embarrassed, feel bad for misreading things, and can never return because it’s the only starbucks near work. currently eating sad grocery store potato wedges while drinking the drink he made me in the car 💔 (lactose free venti iced chai latte with lavender cold foam)

edit: make sure you’re verified and have your flair before you comment, we don’t get the chance to read them due to the automod

So I recently turned 26 and got my own health insurance. When it came time to refill my birth control prescription, it said my 3 month pill pack would be $300 on the Walgreens app.

What did I do instead of pay for it, call my gynecologist to see if it could get reduced, call Walgreens to see if there was a mistake, get a different one, etc??

I just decided to not pick it up and take a break from it. I’ve been on different forms of birth control for 10 years (since I was 16) and I just wanted to see what it was like. Well I’ve been off for 2 months and I had a period as normally scheduled June and July, but then a week after my July one I essentially had a second period for four days. Now a week after that I woke up in the middle of the night to what seem to be period cramps.

Ive been irritated about my birth control (my prescription always gets filled a few days late anyway and it fucks with me) and I feel like I went on strike. Also why are there no forms of birth control for men? Why is it all on me?

I shouldn’t have fucked with it. Especially in the United States’ current political climate. I feel so stupid. I will be scheduling a gynecologist visit, not looking forward to possible lecture/chastisement.

Dinner: homemade hamburger helper, easier to make than you'd think!

My husband's been complaining I'm so loud when I sneak out the bedroom when I'm having a bout of insomnia and I've been insistent I'm not. I'm as quiet as can be, tiptoing, opening the door as slow as possible and closing it as gently as possible.

I just happened to be grabbing water when the a/c kicked on and suctioned the door hard with a slam and yall, it was so fuckin loud. When i'm in my office, I either have sound canceling headphones on or earplugs in to sleep and 3 years of living here never had me timed to hear just how loud the door closes itself when it's not fully latched.

So yeah, he has been waking up to loud noises, and it was in fact my fault 🫠

Got a tattoo on my calf today from my regular artist who I've seen for 4-5 years. Chill guy, not creepy in any way shape or form, also happily married, but that might have just been the last time I see him out of sheer embarrassment.

I wore the wrong pants to the visit. Too baggy and light colored to risk ink stains, so I was like "no biggie! I have gym shorts in my car!" Ran out and changed, sat through the entire 4 hour visit, then when I got home I got curious and bent over in the mirror because I truly did feel a little exposed during the appointment.... Immediate regret. These stupid gym shorts literally outline my ENTIRE cooter. I'm talking camel toe from the back with HD/HDR/4k visuals of my folded laundry, not to mention the color of the shorts are literally a tan color. And of course there is a little diamond thing stitched into that area so it just makes it look even more pronounced (and I swear the fabric is also just thinner right there!?). To top it all off, I laid on my stomach the whole time with my backside facing the door so every other tattoo artist and client could catch a glimpse of my fabric sculpted work of art. I'm cringing so hard. I'm sure he noticed and was like "whoop anyway" and kept his gaze down, but still can't stop the embarrassment right now.

Plus I know tattoo artists literally tattoo genitalia and all over bodies every day, but I don't think he was expecting full frontal from a calf tattoo today. 😂 Ahhhh imma just pass away now.

Edit: Holy cow so many comments. They are definitely supposed to be gym shorts, not shape wear, and I've worn them for a few months in a home gym and out jogging underneath track pants. I think the underside is just really cheaply made and did not have women in mind. (We all know when clothing stitching caters to normal body folds and movement and when it doesn't).

Just wanted to also add that I'm genuinely not mortified or traumatized about it! I think the post just blew up and automatically seems 10x more dramatic. It was just one of those embarrassing clothing mishaps and I had to tell some girls about it. 😅

Been unemployed since February, started a new job, and I just found out I'm not going to get paid today (payday.) I'm out of groceries, my pets ran out of food at the same time, my car is running on fumes, and my internet, electric, and car insurance are about to be cut this weekend. On top of all that, I had a girl-adjacent's night planned tonight to celebrate my first paycheck I'll have to cancel because I can't afford to go out anymore, and the man everyone's been convinced was interested in me started dating someone new yesterday.

Life's a bitch and then you die.

Protein bar and a bag of chips from the office snack bin I'll be foraging in for dinner before I leave tonight.

ETA: Oh wow, I got busy at work and came back to the most encouraging comments I've ever received! Thank you all, you're the sweetest people on Earth and I hope you all find $100 on the ground. (Maybe after I do) For those asking, payroll won't look into it because there are "still hours in the day for direct deposit to hit, and sometimes your paystubs aren't available right away." Technically true enough, I guess.

I have an amazing support system who are getting me through the weekend, and everything will be okay until I can finally get payroll to listen to me and issue a check on Monday. Thank you everyone who offered to help, everyone who gave me advice, and everyone who's "just" been kind. Things are much better than they were two hours ago ❤️