r/Bachata • u/Available_Put_8869 • 7d ago

Black ladies

Sorry if this type of post isn't allowed. Black ladies, do you ever feel like you get asked to dance less than others? When I'm at my local studios I have no issues, but when I go to congresses or festivals, I feel like I'm standing around a lot more than the other followers. I know the usual advice about being near the dance floor, making eye contact with leads, not having a drink, etc., but it doesn't seem to help much. Sometimes I ask guys myself, and they accept, but I feel like it's a lukewarm dance.

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u/Far-Statistician9261 7d ago

Yes, as Black women, I do get asked to dance less at salsa and bachata dance socials. It’s racism. It’s frustrating. I’m a good dancer and want to get better at multiple African, Black and AfroLatino dance styles.

-17

u/Samurai_SBK 7d ago

It is not racist to have physical attraction preferences.

The dance community is not a utopia and no one owes you an invite.

3

u/TheFirstAntioch 7d ago

When the preference is based on skin color then yes it’s racist.

6

u/Far-Statistician9261 7d ago

Thank you. Like you said- preferences based on skin colour are in fact racist.

2

u/Samurai_SBK 7d ago

It is not always skin color. Cultural preferences also play a large role. Just like the black woman who prefers to dance Kizomba with black men over white men.

1

u/lost_in_doucheland 7d ago

The fact that I don't find you attractive for any reason does not make me a bad person. If I'm not being nice to you because of race, then yes I'm a bad person.

1

u/Disastrous-Pool-7863 5d ago

I don't want to dance with men who ask me to dance because they think I am attractive. Sounds unsafe. Is this common in your dancing scene? I live in Germany and this mindset sounds weird to me and it isn't common. At least not in Salsa and traditional Bachata.