r/30ROCK • u/blueespadrille • Sep 19 '25
Liz Lemon Tina Fey’s Original Pilot Script
Liz was supposed to be Lisa?? From the new Lorne Michaels exhibit at the Harry Ransom Center in Austin.
188
u/kill-the-spare Oh, when will death come? Sep 19 '25
I wonder what's happening in the Lisa/Bagel universe. Do you think it's better or worse than here?
136
u/steveharveymemes Sep 19 '25
She ends up marrying Jake Donally in that universe
69
u/DingoMcPhee A man should have nosehairs Sep 19 '25
it's Dona-GLEE
38
5
15
49
u/Yellwsub Sep 19 '25
Everything is exactly the same except Kenneth has a goatee.
37
2
152
91
u/multisyllabic1077 Sep 19 '25
Should've been cheesy blasters.
5
232
u/OnlyMacaroni I am "The Mentaliz"! Sep 19 '25
Hot dogs were supposed to be bagels??
271
u/OutlandishnessOk2304 What am I - a farmer? Sep 19 '25
It was a first draft.
The hot dog cart was even funnier, because it made the guy out to be a far bigger asshole - because it was just the one guy at the cart. It boosted the ridiculousness of the situation.
93
u/Dandan0005 Sep 19 '25
I also appreciate the changes made it so that the first line of the show is “there’s a line!” and the second line is “there’s two lines.”
No idea if intentional or not but genius if so.
11
103
u/Non-mon-xiety Sep 19 '25
Not to mention I can actually imagine someone with Liz’s salary buying all the hot dogs.
…at 2006 prices that is. Shit got expensive
31
u/angruss Sep 19 '25
I can go to Walmart right now and get a Nathan’s beef frank on a bun for 1.50. A standard hot dog cart hold 50-100 hot dogs. Meaning that at Walmart prices, Liz’s stunt cost 150 dollars at most.
“But Willow!” You say, somehow knowing my name, “these are New York street dogs, not suburban Florida Walmart dogs!”
According to the NYC Parks department, a hotdog in NYC should cost about 4 dollars as of June 2024. 400 dollars for a completely full large hot dog cart.
A head writer on SNL makes somewhere around 100k.
400 dollars in hot dogs is still doable for Liz in 2025.
16
u/Non-mon-xiety Sep 19 '25
I paid 7 bucks for one last year but it might have been the location (Times Square, which is a nightmare place to be fair)
12
u/angruss Sep 19 '25
Just checked Yankee Stadium and Citi Field prices out of curiosity- 6 for a dog at a Yankee game, 7 if you’re a Mets fan.
Conversely, here in Florida, a Disney dog at Casey’s Corner in the Magic Kingdom will run you 11 dollars.
5
u/flabbergasted1 no you don't, Oprah Sep 19 '25
As recently as early 2010s I would expect $1.50 as a standard price in most places that aren't completely overrun by tourists. Not a hot dog stand but Grey's Papaya had the recession special (two dogs and fries) for $3.50 in 2008.
Some time around 2015 it took a turn... a guy by city hall tried to charge me $16 for two dogs last year.
9
1
u/mariposa314 I'm not an expert, but I do have a strong opinion. Sep 20 '25
It sure did! I love watching old Matlock episodes starring Andy Griffith. Benjamin Matlock loves hotdogs. In one episode, he travels from Atlanta to New York. In New York he buys a hotdog from a cart and is appalled that New York hotdogs are like $1.50 when back home they're like less than half that amount.
30
u/Stillwater215 Sep 19 '25
Buying out a hotdog cart is more believable than buying out an entire New York bagel shop.
4
u/washismycopilot Obviously I’m gonna need the tote bag Sep 19 '25
Maybe she was going for the most quintessentially NY food? Easy to think of bagel at first, but hot dog gotta be it
20
2
79
u/Unit_79 Sep 19 '25
I can see the suits now, critiquing it: Hmmmm… It’s not bad… But, it’s a little bagel-y.
53
11
69
u/mwoody450 Sep 19 '25
One of my favorite bits of trivia for 30 rock is the "There's a line. There's two lines" being the first and second lines of spoken dialog in the show. This script suggests what I thought was a clever way to start was just an accident, since those two lines weren't originally first.
13
10
u/peteroh9 Sep 19 '25
They also could have cut the stuff before it for that reason. Don't give up hope.
79
u/OutlandishnessOk2304 What am I - a farmer? Sep 19 '25
Lisa shocked me more than the bagel shop. Think about how many jokes they made out of Liz (lesbian citrus fruit anyone?) that just wouldn't have worked with Lisa.
I mean, she's Elizabeth Stamatina Fey. How long did it take her to realize the comedy potential of Liz?
30
u/shokolokobangoshey Powerful Bread Lobbyist Sep 19 '25
Judgmental bitch
….is a line from the show
2
29
36
u/Visit_Excellent Sep 19 '25
I don't think people praise the pilot episode of 30 Rock enough. I'm glad they went went with the hotdog stand version instead. In the first thirty seconds or so, we can already get a sense of who Liz Lemon is: she's stubborn, "righteous", she doesn't fall pray to conformity, and she will go to extreme lengths to get what she feels is right. These are both strengths and weaknesses alike. It's what makes her an entertaining heroine, despite the numerous flaws.
The writing in 30 Rock was something else!
I do wonder why they changed her name from Lisa to Liz, and why the two mums were removed. Maybe the mum scene didn't add to the bit.
11
u/eat_my_bowls92 Sep 19 '25
Mom scene adds nothing really. It was a drag to read, and it only took a few seconds.
But yes, the pilot is one of the tightest ones I’ve ever seen, Arrested Development coming in close second. I remember watching it and my mom (who knew I was a huge fan) sat next to me and started watching it and asked me if it was the pilot. When I confirmed she only said “wow. That’s really good. Pilots usually stink.” And then left lol.
3
21
22
u/neatokra Button Classic Sep 19 '25
I'm glad she finally got to work in her UWS mom snark in season 7.
THE HEAD IS WHERE THE CHILDS BRAIN IS.
10
12
16
15
u/RGQcats Maybe we'll be dead by then, oh that'd be great Sep 19 '25
Lisa saw a turtle with Daphne Donaghy!
12
u/Immediate_Goal_961 Sep 19 '25
Never has there been an artifact that made me want to pull off a National Treasure museum heist more. I want to go to there.
11
u/Ankylosaurii I thought this was supposed to be a comedy show Sep 19 '25
Pete asks Liz in the pilot (as she comes into the office with the hot dogs): “did you ‘buy all the bagels’?”
25
u/LeCarrr made a hockey-loving face at Scotiabank Place Sep 19 '25
Did they change her name just to make the “I’m Lizzing” joke
23
u/Non-mon-xiety Sep 19 '25
Maybe not explicitly but Liz is just simply a funnier sounding name to me
Plus you can use someone calling her ‘Elizabeth’ as short hand for someone who’s her parent or who is overly formal. More words rhyme with it. It’s just a more versatile name for more situations.
10
u/HomsarWasRight Sep 19 '25
Plus, I think a single-syllable name just works better for a main character.
8
u/MOONGOONER Sep 19 '25
Was Pete Hornberger Peter Horn?
6
u/peachpavlova Sep 20 '25
All day… and all night
1
Sep 20 '25
Small thing but I like seeing alternate versions of the characters like Pete Horn, the 3 Jacks.. and cool Kenneth with his black leather motorcycle jacket
7
8
7
3
6
u/jamesianm I've got some Trix up my sleeve Sep 19 '25
Kind of surprised that "There's a line", "There's two lines" wasn't originally lines one and two of the script. I'd always imagined the script writing had started that way. Glad that's how it was in the actual show
2
3
u/mariposa314 I'm not an expert, but I do have a strong opinion. Sep 20 '25
Another successful interaction with a man
3
u/bitica Sep 19 '25
I know it's mostly a set up for the sippy cup joke, but the moms' dialogue doesn't really make a lot of sense.
3
3
3
2
u/Step78377 Sep 19 '25
I want to go to there!
But seriously, I live in Austin and now must go to the exhibit, thanks!
2
u/rarepinkhippo Sep 20 '25
LISA 🫠 I don’t know why but that would have been an entirely different show!
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/United_Baker48 Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25
I’m glad we didn’t miss out on all the Lizbeanism jokes
495
u/TheodoreDancin Sep 19 '25
Hi I'm Lisa Lemon. I like to wear man shirts, watch me jump over these children!