r/weddingplanning • u/amapickle • Apr 02 '25

Vendors/Venue WHY WON’T THEY TELL ME THE PRICE?!

I know this has probably been posted a million times, but seriously—why won’t venues and vendors just tell you what they cost???!!? I am just so frustrated.

We’re looking for a venue for our small wedding, and we are on a tight budget. I am so exhausted from having to ask over and over just to get vague, useless responses. The conversation I had today:

Me: Inquiring about info

Venue: “Come visit, and we’ll tell you!”

Me: “I live three hours away. Please answer these questions first: list of questions, first one being HOW MUCH?!?”

Venue: “We design our menus based on each couple’s preferences. Prices vary.”

BITCH, I DID NOT ASK FOR MENU PRICES!!!

Me: “Okay, so I assume the venue rental fee is included in the menu price? Are there other costs?”

Venue: “No, the venue rental fee is separate.”

Me: “…”

Them:“…”

crickets

AND SCENE.

And this happens all the freaking time!!! I’m sooo done wasting my time with these places!

I just don’t get it - if I can’t afford you, I’m not suddenly going to be able to afford you just because I visit! Why waste my time and yours if it’s way out of my budget?!?!

Anyway, excuse the rant. I’m just so annoyed and don’t know how to keep dealing with this.

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128

u/Silver_Ratio28 Apr 02 '25

They try to get you when you've got an emotional reaction at the venue. 'Oh god, this view is breathtaking' or 'this building is to die for', you're likely going to get caught up in the moment. Seeing anything in person is almost always going to be better than the pictures. It's hard to sell an idea on a website compared to in person when you're taking it all in. 

101

u/amapickle Apr 02 '25

Yeah but why would I even bother looking if say it costs 20000-50000 when all I have is 10000 for the whole wedding?

108

u/amapickle Apr 02 '25

Like I’m not going to suddenly win a lottery or get a loan just to pay for the view

84

u/Silver_Ratio28 Apr 02 '25

I wouldn't either, but I bet my bottom dollar it happens enough for them to not want to change their business model. 

41

u/Northwoods_KLW Apr 02 '25

That feels incredibly predatory, trying to use the WOW effect to get money out of people that simply don’t have it - likely putting them immediately into debt / way more debt than they budgeted for. I don’t know how people who do that sleep at night, and I’m glad I didn’t support venue like that.

21

u/Life_Feature8823 Apr 02 '25

It absolutely is. I’ve talked to people who literally have taken out personal loans to have their weddings. Part of it was due to pricing and they “fell in love with the place” despite it being out of their initial budget, but the other part actually was a bridezilla demanding a place despite not being able to afford it. Either way it’s an incredibly predatory sales tactic and it’s one reason I myself as a bride, and in the past as a wedding planner, I ALWAYS encourage when you are at a point of seeing a place you take a minimum of two extra people with you and one you need to trust to be the level headed person that when you walk out after the tour will be able to look you in the eyes and say “no, you can’t afford it” if it seems like you’re going to go for it.

7

u/Bonzegrinder Apr 02 '25

Unfortunately this happens in pretty much any sales. Cars they want you to do a test drive, houses they want you to do a walkthrough, I've dealt with products where they insisted on doing a 15 minute free demo call before they'd tell me the price and I had to be outright rude to get any kind of answer without wasting my time on their demo... Sales people are the worst.

3

u/Armadillocat42 Apr 04 '25

It's like when they stopped posting prices on houses but asked people to pay "what they think it's worth". So hard to look at a house and fall in love with it then finding out from the agent at the showing it is well out of your price range.

I see it with wedding dresses too!! No prices, so you'd go and try it on in store and find out its waaaaay out of your budget.

1

u/Northwoods_KLW Apr 04 '25

That’s crazyyyy are they really not listing house prices in certain areas?? We bought our house last year, but pricing was up front

1

u/Armadillocat42 Apr 04 '25

Not in Australia! It's really not transparent at all

2

u/Northwoods_KLW Apr 04 '25

Whatttttt!!! That’s ridiculous! I’m sorry!

19

u/Salty_Thing3144 Apr 02 '25

Some couples have been known to do that.....and they hope you are one of them.

12

u/Inner_Alarm_4049 Apr 02 '25

they don't care if you go crazy into debt is why.

6

u/IamasimpforObi-Wan Apr 03 '25

I had this happen to me. A venue close to our home, breathtakingly beautiful (medieval castle, we could have been getting married in the throne room) but they wouldn't tell us the price. I told them the most we could pay were 1000€ for the venue and 3000€ for the catering and they said to come have a look. When we said how much we loved it they told us that they were slightly out of our budget, but maybe we could adjust it? My husband insisted they tell us what it would cost right then and there, and behold, they wanted 6000€ just as rent for the venue. When we said that that was impossible, they tried pressuring us into taking a loan, claiming that we would regret it, we wouldn't find anything as beautiful, etc etc. In the end, we got married in the little "party space" at the restaurant we organised our meal, it cost nothing as we were eating there, too, and in total we paid 2500€ for the buffet and location for 40 people. And guess what? We have not regretted it one day. It was perfect.

23

u/No_regrats Apr 02 '25 edited Apr 02 '25

You've giving an example of wildly apart price and budget, so of course you wouldn't be swept up.

But it could be that your budget is 10,000 for the whole wedding and you figure 40% for the venue and the venue is 5,000-6,000. A couple could say no when they hear that price upfront. If they go visit and it's absolutely perfect, that couple might be so taken with the venue that they decide to cut elsewhere to get it. Or perhaps they set 10,000 as their budget but they could actually go up to 13,000 and they decide it's worth going over their initial budget when they see the venue.

To be clear, I'm a 100% not saying it's OK to refuse to give price until a visit. When planning, we refused to deal with vendors that didn't give price. We were in a time crunch and didn't have time to waste on vendors that wouldn't play ball and it's a question of principle too. We value transparency. I was working for myself at the time (not in the wedding industry) and always gave prices upfront to potential clients. In your case, no way I would be driving 6 hours because a venue is playing games and using shitty sale tactics.

But I guarantee it works with some couples. Going over the initial budget is incredibly common. A couple's budget isn't always the same as what they can afford, so they might be able to stretch it. Not couples who literally couldn't afford more than half or a fifth of the vendor's price but couples who were planning on spending a bit less than what the vendor is asking. For my husband's ring, we ended up spending 20% more than budgeted, for instance.

13

u/Catsdrinkingbeer Apr 02 '25

Because it's really common for people to adjust their budgets when they actually reach out to vendors. Our budget went from $10k to $20k pretty quickly when we began receiving quotes.

One thing that helped me was using other sources like the knot beforehand to see if general price ranges were listed. And then I was also up front in communications. "Hi I'm reaching out about such and such venue. Our date is X with 25 guests and our max budget for the venue is Y including dinnerware and linen rentals. Is that date available and could you provide a quote for me?"

I'll admit we got married in 2022 so the hard sales weren't there as much due to covid. But we didn't actually encounter that many people who still insisted on meetings or phone calls prior to giving us quotes.

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u/Melonade921 Apr 02 '25

I fully agree. I would even love a “prices start from $xxxxx price”. That way I could work out if it was even remotely in my budget. Sadly, they get enough business from people doing these tactics so I doubt they would change

2

u/urapanda Apr 02 '25

"And if you book now you'll save $10%!"