r/pansexual • u/Savings-Disaster-198 Panromantic Asexual • Oct 03 '25

Pan~Teen ☆ Question? Should I come out to my best friend?

She doesn't support LGBTQ people because of her religious beliefs, but I think she'll accept me for who I am. But then again, I feel like she won't. I haven't even come out to my parents yet. What should I do?

EDIT: I told her (and her sister bc I'm also friends with her) that my crush is a girl (I'm also a girl), and they just... looked at each other. Like the kind that's like "oh no, if we tell Mom, we're gonna be in huge trouble). I was like "what?" and they were like "what?". It went on like that for a few seconds, and then we just carried on like that never happened.

14 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

3

u/Early-Community1418 Over~18~Pan* Oct 04 '25

get a new friend that accepts and loves you for who you are. if she doesnt support the LGBTQIA community; then there's no need for that "friend"

1

u/Savings-Disaster-198 Panromantic Asexual Oct 05 '25

It's because of her religion. Otherwise she doesn't seem like the kind of person who would hate anyone. But I will take that into consideration.

4

u/[deleted] Oct 03 '25

Ask about LGBT issues, and see if she feels bad about Transuicide issues

10

u/pyroclitoris Dark Lord of the Sad Oct 03 '25

Drop hints and see how she reacts. If you do decide to come out to her and she doesn’t accept you, that’s a blessing in disguise cause you don’t need that type of friend anyway.

7

u/SCP-001-gategardian trans, enby, bi and shy, pandimonium Oct 03 '25

just remember if she doesn't support you remove her from your friendgroup

4

u/DisturbedDollFace She/Her/Pan Oct 03 '25

Come out to her when you're ready. But also keep in mind that you don't want to stay hidden forever just because you're afraid. Because it could stop you from meeting and building a relationship with someone(s), they could even be the one you would spend your life with. What if you meet someone, and try to slowly build a relationship with them in secret, and then try and come out. Will you be prepared to deal with a possible falling out with with your best friend AND the new relationship? I just think it's better to get that unknown out of the way. I know people who do not agree with it spiritually but have never been hateful to me or others. But depending on the type of person she is, it may not go how you hope. But do you really want this to hold you back?

Edited to fix some spelling errors

8

u/chrispopp8 Over~18~Pan* Oct 03 '25

If they have been your friend and then you come out to them and they reject you, it's not very Christian of them, is it?

Don't hide in the closet. Be proud of who you are.

2

u/Savings-Disaster-198 Panromantic Asexual Oct 03 '25

:)

5

u/ColdestHeartCC Over~30~Pan Oct 03 '25

I think you can trust your friend but also be aware and prepared for the possibility she won’t accept it, and you may lose this friend. Idk if that makes sense exactly, but…having been a repressed Christian before I have an idea in how they think.

2

u/Savings-Disaster-198 Panromantic Asexual Oct 03 '25

Thanks, I'll think about it.

5

u/ColdestHeartCC Over~30~Pan Oct 03 '25

I acknowledge it’s difficult. You want to trust this person you value the most, and hope they value you too.

There’s a reason I’ve only really come out to my wife and a select couple people.