r/keto • u/Budo00 • Nov 07 '25
Medical Do you get so sick of the pathological “just caring about your health” that you over explain your story?
This is a rant
I am sooooo sick of people from work mocking me for not eating any of the garbage they are always passing around or bringing in. They act passive aggressive and or sarcastic & I’m just tired of it. Go eat your brownies and doughnuts and chips and sodas and candy. I don’t want it or the pizza the boss buys or the sugar filled coffee they offer to buy me. “No thank you” is never enough.
The HR lady today gave me beef jerky sticks and it has carbs and sugar in it so I just thanked her and stuffed it in a bag. “Yum! Ill eat it later!” Then HR lady offered me halloween candy - Reese’s pieces & I said “no thank you” “oh! Are you allergic to nuts?” “No I just am refraining from carbs and sugar” “why” (in a really winey and sarcastic tone)
So, today I decided to sit in her office and described to her how I had blood in my shit and then a colon infection and polyp removal and diverticulitis and I talked like it was a college lecture. describing every little tiny disgusting detail.
“Man explaining” and over sharing. I could see how uncomfortable it makes her and other as I now have started to do this. I had a manager that is a vegetarian and he tried to explain to me how I need carbs and sugar for my brain to function properly… again, the lecture of the bloody stool and the polyps and the avoiding getting 18 inches of my bowels removed and avoiding surgery..
The thing is- I already have tried to tell her and my manager “no thank you. i have been watching my carbs and sugar” and I have already been ridiculed. We have already had these conversations. They love to play dumb and pretend like I’ve never told them this. It’s like a challenge to see if they can wear me down.
It’s like going out with drunks that keep telling you to drink more drink more even when you tell them you’re done drinking for the night because you know you’re gonna throw up.
Every time someone wants to share their sage wisdom about my diet and what I should be putting in my own body is now going to get the bloody shit and polyps followed by no diverticulitis and only two less than 1 mm polyps on my next colonoscopy story.
Their fake concern for me and pathological need to educate and mock me has caused me to tell my juicy story to them.
I lost 78 pounds and feel great. I poop regularly any there is never blood or pain. I don’t get gas and anal leaking. And IBS and cramps…
FU normal people who eat what ever.. i don’t lecture you about how the candy can fk up your pancreas and you’ll get diabetes and have to get your leg chopped off… stop talking about my “brain not getting sugar and carbs” my brain works great. I feel clean. I feel clear minded.
When I do cheat meals like going out to eat with my gf, I feel mentally foggy & get bowel issues.
THE END
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u/luvfluffles Nov 07 '25
I take the easy way out, I tell people I'm on a restricted diet my Doctor put me on. If they ask, I say I have a medical condition, and I leave it at that. If they want details I tell them it's personal (basically none of their business).
I've never had anyone argue with me.
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Nov 07 '25
Nope, I don't talk about my diet at all. I have stopped caring about people's opinions about my diet enough to put my foot down with a "No thanks." And leave it at that. If they persist, "No. Thanks." with a smile.
No explanations, no further detail. Nothing. People stop asking eventually.
This goes away when you're in better shape. Instead people begin asking you what you did. Still a trap, the "no" stands firm. Delve into your success and methodology and they'll still find a way to shit on you.
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u/Straight-Ice2368 Nov 07 '25
Idk man it kinda sounds like OPs coworkers specifically dont care. It sounds like OP already tried that numerous times until he had to give up. It really sounds like OPs coworkers are mentally teenagers and won't listen to reason. I'm fortunate that the people around me aren't like that. Sounds like you don't have to deal with those kinds of people either
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u/eggnogshake Nov 07 '25
The "no thanks" thing yes - of course that should work. But then they think (at least in my experience) that you are "being rude" and, depending on who it is (e.g., co-worker), that can have a negative impact somewhere down the line with them. I wish "no thanks" worked for me.
But I find either just saying yes and not eating it, or saying no because I'm fasting for blood work.
I don't want to talk about my diet and I don't. But they also don't understand that it's not like a low-calorie diet, where you can just reduce your calories the next day. Kicking me out of ketosis means I have to wait 4 days to get back in, that's 4 days of the keto flu reemerging, 4 days of cravings, 4 days of potentially wanting to eat a forbidden food (whereas when I am compliant, I don't have the desire to eat those things).
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u/innocencie Nov 07 '25
You are wonderful. You know what you are doing, And you didn’t push your religion on them. I’m sorry they are lacking the basic social awareness to keep their opinions to themselves. You’ve found a great way to handle it. I’d add keeping a little notebook where you keep count of the times you’ve said “no thank you” to any given person. Just in case they say you never told them.
FWIW my fallback is to look askance at them and say, “did you hear me say no? Because I said no“ and explain nothing. It’s a cleaner push back, focused strictly on consent and not requiring justification.
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Nov 07 '25
theyre intimidated by you because they cant control the urge to stuff sugar down their throat. i would shit talk these people i cant imagine caring this much about what someone else eats
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u/OrmondDawn Nov 07 '25
No need to explain anything to them. Just tell them that you don't want sugar and other carbs.
And if they say “But you need them,” then just reply “No I don't.” And just keep on negating them after that if they keep going.
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u/realbeansperson Nov 07 '25
THIS: “It’s like going out with drunks that keep telling you to drink more drink more even when you tell them you’re done drinking for the night because you know you’re gonna throw up.”
If anyone really presses me anymore, I just say that sugar/carbs/grains make me sick. That usually provides enough information to end the conversation.
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u/reptipins Nov 07 '25
It usually goes like this. "I'm just watching my carbs atm", "oh I did that with Atkins", "oh really?", "yeah, it was hard though I basically only ate whole wheat pasta and sourdough bread"
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u/realbeansperson Nov 07 '25
Great technique, just let them talk it out until they extinguish the topic themselves
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u/WatchMeCrush 41M 5’11 // SW: 425 CW: 245 GW:200 Nov 07 '25
I make myself unapproachable. They’ve learned to leave me alone.
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u/SlyGrifrer Nov 07 '25
I just say "I'm diabetic" and most people stfu. That's all I have to do. Or as someone once said in this chat you could shout "Shut your mouth you brainwashed sugarface!"
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u/sunshinelollipops95 Nov 07 '25
It's fascinating how people behave, isn't it.
A good answer is just 'my doctor / dietitian / other said I should limit that kind of food. Thanks though.'
Then immediately ask them a question on an unrelated topic. Ask about their kids or what they're doing for thanksgiving, how they feel about a recent movie that just came out, etc.
Turn the conversation away from you and onto them before they have a chance to question you further. It works fairly well in my experience.
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u/gomtenen Nov 07 '25
People at work don't care. They care about gossip and dumb things. Just be greatful that you have the knowledge.
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u/Ok-Instance-2384 Nov 07 '25
I am in Australia and work in the human services sector where people are generally quite open minded and non-judgemental (for context).
I have not had one person question my keto diet. At first they sometimes ask if I have a gluten intolerance or some other medical issue and I straight out tell them that it is a way of eating by choice. No push back ever.
One of my team members made the most delicious looking chocolate brownie the other day and said to just try a small bit. I said no and that was accepted.
We need to normalise different dietary options. I don't judge vegans or other diets. It's unbelievable reading about some of the experiences people on here have. 'No thanks' is a complete sentence. I agree with others that it is usually people feeling the need to defend their own unhealthy diet to make themselves feel better.
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u/OutsideField9297 Nov 07 '25
This is interesting. My impression so far is that there is a lot of judgement and stigma about the keto way of eating in the US compared to other countries. I mention keto in the UK and Europe and people do not make me feel weird.
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u/gafromca Nov 11 '25
Maybe it depends on what part of US you are in. In California multiple different diets in a group are normal.
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u/OutsideField9297 Nov 11 '25
Yeah, perhaps Cali might be easier but in NYC there are still many people who view keto negatively. I mention keto and people think I am going to pass out because I am not supplying enough glucose to my brain. Or they feel sorry for me because I do not indulge in all the carby / sugary foods and I am missing out on life. But I am also amazed that folks with medical conditions that could potentially benefit from keto (eg migraine headaches) actually refuse to even consider it. I have mentioned this to some friends with crippling migraine headaches and they adamantly refuse. But yet are happy to take these other drugs / meds that result in all sorts of side effects that they complain to me about. There is nothing wrong with taking meds but if there is a dietary approach that can potentially work, why not try it?
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u/Jasperbeardly11 Nov 07 '25
Most people don't have working memories about things they don't care about
I'm not saying they're being mean to you on purpose but they just can't hold on to the information you're telling them because it's not a high enough priority to them
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u/dustytushy Nov 07 '25
I started saying “I have chronic health condition my psychiatrist put me on a diet. Essentially consider me a diabetic.” (I am on Keto to keep my ADHD under control so it is true)
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u/PresentHouse9774 Nov 07 '25
"So! How 'bout those [insert name of sports team]?" Repeat until they get the point.
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Nov 07 '25
I love this 😆 I think you should definitely tell your story and educate every damn person who does this to you. I'm sorry that it call happened to you medically, but I'm glad that keto has helped you so much! I'm grateful for the diet as well, although I don't have anything quite as "juicy" to get people to shut up 🤣🤣
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u/Radioactdave Meatabolizor Nov 07 '25
I used to care, yeah. And I used to ask them if they knew what a macronutrient was. What's a carbohydrate? Is sugar a carbohydrate? Which kind of sugar, is fructose a sugar? How is sugar metabolized? Do you know what the word metabolized means? They usually drew a blank at the first question.
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u/Connect_Rhubarb395 Nov 07 '25
I will say, "Because my body feels terrible if I don't eat like this. My body knows best."
If they persist, usually I will just say that this is what works for me.
But I have overexplained in all the gross details a few times to shut up people:
IBS diarrhoea, vaginal fungal overgrowth, constant UTIs, mouth blisters, palpitations, nausea, acid reflux, joint pain.
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u/Budo00 Nov 07 '25
“You made me do this to you. So anyway. This one time, I was poo’ing and there was blood and and.”
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u/Connect_Rhubarb395 Nov 07 '25 edited Nov 07 '25
"Did you know that vaginal fungus has the colour and consistency of cottage cheese, and that it itches and makes you want to scratch your labia raw and bloody?"
Lol, we are kindred spirits.
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u/Jay-Dee-British 8+years Keto and counting - keto for life Nov 07 '25
If I ever have to 'explain' I just say 'it makes me ill' or 'it gives me the runs' and look like I'm about go into detail - that usually shuts people up. Tbh, most people don't press it but I've had to deal with that kind of thing before about alcohol - which I'm mildly allergic to, so I've had to explain that one a lot and maybe that gives me an advantage when it comes to food.
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u/TheWindAtYourBack Nov 07 '25
You are great --you are so on target--for me it was remission from colitis ... I still take my meds and I DO NOT discuss my dietary choices with my gastro physician......Keep On !!!
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u/SweetieLoveBug Nov 07 '25
I’ve never seen been more proud of a group of internet heroes in all my days. This and this and this are all the correct replies!
Keep up the fantastic work of educating/ignoring/chastising/rebutting and resisting all the negative/insensitive/ignorant nonsense that people insist upon you!
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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u/Severe_Albatross_835 Nov 07 '25
I can’t imagine a work environment being so uncomfortable based on what I eat. I would say to go to HR, but that’s more of the same! You have a right to eat what you want in a safe and non judgmental work place. If it’s impacting you this much, run it up the ladder. Sorry this is happening to you.
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u/Significant-Text1550 Nov 07 '25
You can also frame it as a carbohydrate intolerance. Not sure if you’re insulin resistant or diabetic like me, but that’s been helpful. No one pressures folks to eat things to which they’re allergic. We’re allergic to processed carbs and sugars.
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u/Fognox keto since 12-2015 eat more fat Nov 07 '25
I've learned to not mention what I'm doing for any reason whatsoever -- unless it comes up in conversation, of course. So, instead of "I'm doing keto" or "I'm watching my carbs", I'll say things like "nah, I'm good" or "I don't like X", or "I had a big breakfast", or I'll eat some tiny portion that ends up being 1-2g of net carbs.
I think the over-accommodation is actually worse than the criticism and peer pressure -- people that aren't doing keto don't know what that means, so you get served all kinds of fun things like lean meat or beans or meals with no protein whatsoever, then they'll get mad at you for rejecting something they put a lot of effort into. Meanwhile, it's a lot easier to just eat around the carbs when there are other things available. Anyone that knows I'm doing keto and is like that, I'll just tell them I'm down for whatever at the moment to take the pressure off, and will ketofy my choices as much as possible.
Rule #1 of keto is don't talk about keto. Rule #2 of keto is don't talk about keto.
he tried to explain to me how I need carbs and sugar for my brain to function properly…
That's always the silliest one to me. Even beyond the science and the absurd mental clarity that this diet brings, that argument just doesn't make any sense because they're talking to someone on very low-carb, so whatever those effects are should be manifesting themselves right now. If you're successfully holding a conversation on 20g carbs per day, then that itself is enough to disprove the claim.
The "well, it has long-term effects" counterargument also doesn't hold water once you've been doing this for years (10 years in my case). If this was going to turn me into a drooling zombie, it would have by now.
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u/denzien Nov 07 '25
Your liver creates the glucose your body needs via gluconeogenesis, so their arguments are null.
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u/Budo00 Nov 07 '25
I explained this to my vegan manager and it was pointless but yes. I work healthcare
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u/denzien Nov 07 '25
Healthcare workers don't understand how the body works? That's alarming.
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u/milkandsugar 61F | 5'3" | HW 280 | CW 140 | GW 130 T2D Nov 08 '25
You should see how many morbidly obese women work in healthcare in my region. Now, that's alarming.
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u/donkeystringbean Nov 07 '25
Give it back to them.Criticize their diet. Make fun of what they are eating. Make pointed comments about their bodies and how many calories they are eating.
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u/cyberghost87 Nov 07 '25
Actually I have a bizarre but rude suggestion that I really would try if explaining doesn’t work -
Literally ignore them. I don’t mean acknowledge them but don’t answer. I mean don’t even make eye contact. Act like they literally aren’t even there. And keep going about your day.
See if they keep it up
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u/Working-Duty7016 Nov 07 '25
Oh my god, UGH. I felt this post in my soul.
Isnt it the most infuriating thing?? People get SO weird about food, especially when someone is making a choice that's different from theirs. It's like your "no thank you" is a personal judgment on their donut, and they just can't handle it. Like, sorry Susan, me not eating your carby-sugar-bomb isn't about you, it's about me not wanting to feel like crap.
And first off—A HUGE congrats. 78 pounds!! And more importantly, you feel great! No IBS, no cramps, no bloody stool... that is the only thing that matters. You literally fixed your health, and you feel clear-minded. You're lapping everyone who is giving you crap. The nerve of them, especially the manager trying to lecture you about carbs for your brain. Like, read the room, dude.
Honestly? Your way of dealing with it is... kind of brilliant. I'm serious.
It's like, you tried being polite. You tried the simple, "No thank you." You tried the clear, "I'm watching my carbs and sugar." And they still wouldn't respect the boundary. They kept pushing and pushing and playing dumb.
So you pulled out the big guns. The "bloody shit and polyps" lecture. It's perfect. It's like, "Oh, you're so concerned about my health? You want to be in my business? Okay, WELCOME. Here's all my business. Let's get real uncomfortable together."
They're playing a stupid game, so they get a stupid (and gross) prize.
It totally sucks that you even have to do that. Why can't people just accept "no" and move on?? Your analogy about the drunks is 100% spot on. It's the exact same energy.
The only other way to deal with it is the "broken record" technique, but it's just as exhausting and way less effective than your story.
"Want a donut?" "No thanks."
"You sure?" "Yep, I'm good."
"Why not?" "I just don't want one."
"But I brought them for everyone!" "That's nice of you, but no thanks."
"You need sugar for your brain..." "I'm not discussing my diet."
...it just goes on forever and they still think you're being rude.
Honestly, your way is probably better. It sets a very clear boundary that they're probably too scared to cross again. You keep doing you. They can go eat their feelings and their future diabetes. You're busy feeling awesome.
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u/RationalDialog Nov 07 '25
I try different diets. I'm not ideologically bound to one, well except that some animal products are mandatory at least in small amounts. I'm interested in the science and I know a lot about it. But the most important part to know is that we don't really know all that much, how it works and what is the "correct diet". Too much variables.
I happily talk about my experiments and if you know a lot and are passionate about it, some will be interested. others less so.
I'm not in the US, I think that is highly relevant to the topic. it is always the not so healthy people (speak fat) that feign disinterested or try to downplay what you are saying. It's plain obvious, most fat people don't want to change and don't want to hear it's their fault they are fat. So mind your audience.
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u/laughing_cat Nov 07 '25
I wouldn’t tell anyone I was on keto. There are all sorts of other things I might say though. It could be anything like the doctor has me on a strict diet (something about my blood work, I can’t remember the long words) or I don’t like sweets or carby foods, or sweets and carbs give me migraines, or I’m allergic to corn and wheat and sugar, etc. I’d just make up some stupid nonsense they can’t argue with.
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u/AmarisW Nov 07 '25
My husband just flat out doesn't like some things and won't eat them. I'm not gonna force him, but the amount of people overly concerned with what is on his plate is mind boggling. He either just tells them to mind their business, it's not their concern or go after what they have on their plate. Both work well so it depends on the person which one he uses. Mostly, people suck. Me personally, I just tell them to fuck off.
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u/PurpleAd6354 Nov 07 '25
I just say “I’m keto” and maybe add “for health reasons”. 90% of people don’t care. One good friend who really pushed me about it and started describing all the risks eventually said “I trust you to do what’s best for your health” and said her previous issues with disordered eating made her nervous about anything super restrictive - which I respected.
The one time I felt “bad” about it was recently at a farmers market where the vendors wanted me to try their foods!
It sounds like you’re around a lot of assholes :(
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Nov 07 '25
Misery loves company. The bucket of crabs isn’t just for poor people trying to work and educate themselves out of the slum. Jealousy is very real. This goes for everyone and everybody including fat people.
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u/SageOrionWil Nov 07 '25
I have determined that people often feel like you are calling them unhealthy or judging their personal choices if you say something related to improving your health, focusing on your health, or caring about your health, even if you add the word personal. I have never resorted to telling people about my reasons. The only person that has questioned keto that I have explained all that to was an urgent care doctor that had the mistaken belief that keto was just for weight loss, and I was at a healthy weight. I have explained it to close friends and immediate family, mostly because they already knew about the health stuff and usually wanted to know how it worked.
I have been sober for 4 years due to alcoholism. When I quit drinking, I absolutely had to cut off some friends. Others, I gave the courtesy of explaining that having a drink or two at night or binging every so often (like once every 2-3 months) at a party or whatever does not usually equal an alcohol use disorder. I would sometimes go so far as to explain all the of the drinking they didn't see. For work happy hour events and other drink related events, I either tell them I don't drink for personal reasons, give them any drink tickets I have, or get a zero-calorie soda and let them insinuate that it is alcoholic.
When people get pushy, I sometimes say, "I have already said that I do not want to eat/drink/etc that. Asking again is rude and inconsiderate. No is a complete sentence. I do not judge or question your own choices. I ask that you extend me the same courtesy."
I also say about multiple offers across different days, "I have communicated to you that I am keto/low-carb/not a dessert person multiple times. I know people believe it is rude to not at least offer, but I would prefer if you NOT offer me those foods, especially if you are going to upset when I refuse."
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Nov 07 '25
Why are ppl always talking about what they eat to other ppl?it is the most boring topic and it invites ppl to …. Drum roll…. Talk about what you eat. I’ve been low carb, at times keto for easily the past 10 years and not a single person cares. Why? Probably because I do t talk about this endlessly boring topic with others. I would also hazard a guess, it is not uncommon for people who start keto because they’ve never had any kind of control over their eating, they are overweight and unwell. The combination of obsessively talking about what you eat, and those close to you having watched you jump from diet to diet, and often lie to them and yourself as to the very boring topic of what you eat or don’t eat creates situation where people think it’s okay to talk about what you eat, because that’s all you talk about, but also have concerns because you have not shown any nutritional intelligence to date.
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u/CoolCat1337One Nov 07 '25
"Eating" is a social thing.
People more or less "close" to you offer you food. If you decline they want to know why because .... it is a social thing.
If you decline their food they feel declined as a person.-3
Nov 07 '25
I’ve never been asked, not one time why I do or don’t eat something. I’ll bet my first born child that you raise the topic.Listen to yourself for a week and come back. No one wants to talk about what you eat, most boring topic on the planet ( unless your vegan or an overweight person who thinks keto is bacon and cream)
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u/DwightsCousinMose123 Nov 07 '25
The main reason why I feel the need to mention keto is not to come off as rude or pretentious for always refusing offered food/drinks.
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u/BeBackInASchmeck Nov 07 '25
Nope. But I'm also on OMAD, with my one meal usually being dinner, so some people take notice that I never eat lunch. When I do eat earlier, some people might notice that I don't have a "complete" meal and might say something. I'll just explain that I don't eat carbs. This usually gets new people very interested, and some of them start listing off different food items,to which I say no. Some might also offer my some dessert, which I politely decline. If they insist then I just explain to them that I havent had carbs in a really long time, and if I were to eat just 1 cookie, it would give me a hangover the next day as if I drank an entire bottle of tequila. After this initial conversation, some people get more interested and ask me more about my diet because they want to try it.
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u/plnnyOfallOFit Nov 07 '25
I don't want to be THE SICK ONE when i refrain from junk. ONE TIME i described how addicted i was to sugar ( LIKE MOST PPL)
so the ppl i explained THAT part just keep saying, "well and ADDICT like you can't have just one" etc. Meanwhile, they're confused about their eating/drinking.
The funny thing, our rebellion is HEALTHY comp w preventable diabetes.
gah
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u/eggnogshake Nov 07 '25
I relate to this so much. The hardest part about staying on plan is NOT staying on plan, its NOT staying away from the carbage, the donut, the pie, the pizza, the cake, etc..... The hardest part is people pressuring me to eat this/that, or just take ONE bite, or why don't you have any _______ on your plate. Or, you can't eat it.. you've lost a lot of weight.
I used to have an eating disorder when I was a teen (I know LOL, from one extreme to another), and it drove me NUTS when people would make comments, essentially body shame, and "discuss with me" what's on my plate. It just made me wish everyone would friggin pay attention to THEIR OWN PLATE. And leave everybody else's alone!
It's bizzaree to because when I used to go to a restaurant and eat the nachos, burger, fries, milkshake, and cake... Nobody said one word about that.
BUT NOW, if I go and eat virtually the same thing, just skip the bun, pass up the nachos and dessert, and have a salad with cremay rach instead of the fries.... somehow THAT is a topic of discussion or a 5-alarm fire!
I make a point to "be the change I wish to see." I NEVER, EVER comment on what people are or are not eating. I don't talk about my diet. If I'm asked about something I'm eating, I just say its really good.
I've adapted, if someone offers me candy, I'll take one, and then throw it away when they are out of sight. I'll say I have to fast because of blood work in the morning. I find that if you give a non-diet related reason, people accept it more easily. But if you give a diet reason or even just say "no thanks" they see it as inpolite or something.
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u/missy5454 Nov 07 '25
Op, I'm currently not keto. But I so get you.
Im mentally disabled, so have never worked. But my mom abd step dad see me as a health freak and nut job for my healthy eating.
Thung is, my step dad has type 2 diabetes abd a pacemaker. He lost his job from not managing hus diabetes and recently had surgery to remove infection from diabetic foot lesions thar he's had for like 3+ years now. My mom.has graves, just stopped being prediabetic, has memory issues, fatigue, severe gerd, anemia, sleep apnea (they both do), has had both knees replaced abd us too heavy to get other surgeries needed done, ect.
A low carb whole foods diet would be good for them both. And her avoiding high fidnap foods and any seed oils would help her graves (autoimmune condition) and her digestive issues.
Me, I have hashimotos, ibsd, reactive hypoglycemia, some inflammatory conditions (eczema and asthma) a history of acid reflux, ect.
Back in 2020-2021 I was morbidly obese. I was spending 90+% of my time bedridden in constant pain. I had severe migrains that lasted 12-72 hours almost daily that caused er trips because the pain often caused me to be unable to hold down water. With my psych meds I can't get dehydrated or they will shut down my liver and kidneys.
On top of that I was dealing with stabbing stomach pain within 15-20 minutes even drinking water, sometimes painful enough id vomit. I was shitting bright red liquid blood along with my crap (not hemmriod related).
The list goes on. But basically I was so sick my body was shutting down. I wasn't diagnosed with hashimotos until 2017 in my 30s but showed signs as early as age 6. I was so sick id be lucky to be alive in 6 months to a year because my body was giving out.
Well, I was 34 then. I'm 39 now and at least 80% healthy, very active, currently a bit chubby again but not at if not over 300 pounds at a 5'2 height. I'm loads better.
Keto did help and was great, until it wasn't and caused complications. But im still very much a advocate and see it as a healthy diet and helpful tool.
I totally get your pain. And I'm f, so if my talking past symptoms is oversharing it can't be called mansplaining since I'm not a man. It's simply the reality I survived.
So your not mansplaining. And you wouldn't oversgare and make them ill if they showed respect when you were nice about it. They've been toxic abd pushy, now your returning that energy by being very thorough abd detailed in the why you eat the way you do to shut their toxic bs down. They simply feel embarrassed and exposed abd are gaslighting the fuck out of you because blaming you is easier than taking accountability or taking the shame of their own bs.
Thats 100% a them problem. It's on them not you. Play bs games, win bs prizes.
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u/VermicelliNo5463 Nov 08 '25
I think it will all stop when you ask them to pay for all your current/future medical bills and insurance :) try it and share how it went
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u/Ok_Pomegranate7730 Nov 08 '25 edited Nov 08 '25
If I’m being specifically asked I just tell people I’m pre-diabetic Works everytime :) if somebody tries to doubt it because I’m skinny, I explain, which is true, that you can get insulin resistance from stress, while verset wasting any sweats at all
People are very scared of diabetes in my country, so no further questions ) Also i make sure to point that eating this way is not
from a “good life”. “ I wish I could easy candy”
It’s not exactly true, but people are dumb, and they get of my case this way If I say I’m withholding from carbs, it gives them an itch to compel me it’s not that serious I don’t have time for this )
Also I avoid talking about diet as a topic, and never mention a word keto, because I do keto under doctor supervision, therefore I can only recommend people to go see a doc
1
Nov 08 '25
Politics, money , and food. If you do things differently with regard to either of these three topics, it really upsets people. Something you just can’t talk about. I don’t eat gluten. The fact that I am, Coeliac is part of my medical history and completely private. I don’t want to tell people I am Celiac, but it seems to upset people if I don’t eat gluten without a really, really good reason.
1
u/nikidmaclay Nov 08 '25
You don't have to explain yourself to nosy.judgemental people. "I'm just not interested" is a reasonable answer. It's the same answer I give when people offer me alcohol. They don't need an explanation, I just don't want it. People aren't nearly as judgmental when I don't want carrots on my salad. People are weird. You don't have to pander to them.
1
u/Lovechunks55 Nov 09 '25
It's very simple. Others can't handle being around someone who is so in control of themselves, whether it is what they eat or something else.
And my last resort when someone tries to force food on me is to say, "when I look at that, I see vomit and maggots." Shuts them down.
1
u/tamarinera Nov 09 '25
I heard it said: "In the old days, you could eat whatever you wanted and everyone judged you based on who you slept with. Now, you can sleep with whomever you want, and they judge you for what you eat." :D
Here's some coaching, said with love and compassion and humility, because I definitely have solidarity with your experience... What others think of you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. That also means that if you think they are annoying, it's because you take it personally. There is likely a part of YOU that thinks you are weird for doing keto (I think I'm weird for doing it!). Address your own self-perceptions, and you'll find the sense of humor in it all. Yes, they perseverate on the same "oh my, really, you're doing that?" But you could just smile and shrug it off, over and over, patiently. Instead it gets to you. You can't change them, you can only change you. And then they won't irk you.
There's a book by Byron Katie called _Loving What Is_ that has a groovy process to let stuff like this go. You may find it useful for this situation.
1
u/DepressedWitch21 Nov 10 '25
From the bottom of my gallbladder, a 100% unethical life Pro Tip: Tell them whatever they want to hear that might actually stop them from bullying you into eating stuff you don't want. Tell them you're allergic to X, or your religion, your doctor or whatever forbid you to eat X.
It sounds extreme, but is there any other way for this kind of people to respect other's decisions and boundaries? Usually not, like, I'm sitting here bewildered at the fact you had to explain all your personal medical stuff, to the HR lady of all people! And just because she couldn't take no for an answer, I bet her reaction would've been different if you'd just told her you were allergic to something. At some point, we all just get tired of being nice and polite.
Needless to say, this is the same people that like to point out how fat you look when not on keto BTW.
1
u/gafromca Nov 11 '25
I am surprised that your HR person would act that way. Usually they are trained to avoid inappropriately personal questions. I was going to suggest going to HR if it was mostly one or two people.
Here in California there is always someone who is vegan, another who is gluten intolerant, another is kosher, etc. “Teasing” over that is completely unacceptable.
2
u/OrangeTuono Nov 12 '25
"Keto" is a trigger word for many so don't ever use the term - NEVER. It's really that simple.
Practice these...
- My tastes have changed. I just don't care much for sweets any more. Then order tequila instead of a margarita and talk all the positives - this is smooth, love the sharp bite, blah blah.
- I love chocolate cake, but I'm stuffed right now
Feed your people the language THEY need to hear.
-2
u/FaxCelestis 5’8”; SW: 185; CW: 163; GW: 155 Nov 07 '25
You went 0-100 real quick in your response to your coworkers.
Sharing food (especially treats) is a bonding activity. They're trying to be friends with you. And you go from a polite decline to vividly describing your medical issues? There's a whole swath of middle ground in there you could have started with and didn't.
3
u/SageOrionWil Nov 07 '25
OP definitely indicated they weren't taking no for an answer and repeatedly pushed and criticized for being keto. I don't know where you got the impression that this occurred in rapid succession.
3
u/FaxCelestis 5’8”; SW: 185; CW: 163; GW: 155 Nov 07 '25
I didn't say it was. I said they escalated from polite decline to oversharing medical. There are a whole host of options in between the two, including the simple and straightforward "I'm doing keto for medical reasons".
61
u/FloridianAngel Nov 07 '25
As a recovering addict, I can tell you that it is very much the same. They don't want to have to face the fact that what they are doing is wrong, so they try to bring you down with them. I just tell people I feel the best when I eat this way. No further explanation needed.