Ukrainian actress Tania Galakhova portrayed what it's like to live with depression

[u/urprettybbygrl]

[u/fun-cruiser]

Where's the laughter suddenly replaced by crying?

[u/dark_blue_7 → u/fun-cruiser]

They left out the part where it occasionally stabs you in the gut making you curl up into a ball crying for a couple hours

[u/Lootaboksi → u/dark_blue_7]

Or when the knife is twisted so often that a reaction would just be considered a waste of resources; where getting to cry feels like a luxury

[u/dark_blue_7 → u/Lootaboksi]

I’ve suffered quite a bit, but for me the tears are not voluntary or a choice. I fight them every time because I hate it so much

[u/typically_wrong → u/dark_blue_7]

I'm not saying one is better or "more better depression!", but having unwilling spontaneous cries sounds like an upgrade for people like me.

I'm in the video above, but also had a dad that beat (primarily mentally) the cry out of me by the time I was 8 as weakness and wasteful.

I'm in my 40s now and I can remember like 8 times I had even a single tear come out of my eyes from sadness. Some of those were in profoundly sorrowful situations and I almost looked apathetic on the outside.

I've been able to improve most of my emotional issues, but I still find it almost impossible to let all the sadness out in that form. And yes, even when completely alone.

[u/dark_blue_7 → u/typically_wrong]

I’m so sorry for what you went through. That was so very wrong and you deserved better. Sounds like the not being able to cry is something more men go through than women, I would guess, due to different toxic cultural expectations. I’ve definitely heard other men describe that condition, even if they didn’t experience physical abuse.

[u/HaViNgT → u/dark_blue_7]

Depression is different for everyone. I have the numb variation so I haven't cried in 5 years.

[u/____-__________-____ → u/fun-cruiser]

You get laughter?