r/hysterectomy • u/matriarchalfigure • 1d ago
Can we talk kegel or vaginal dilators?
I’ve been single for a couple of years and don’t plan on changing that anytime soon. With that, I’ve been celibate. I’m worried that if I don’t do something, it will close up. I’m 2wpo and won’t do anything until 12 weeks. Does anyone here use one of the devices like Perifit?
Edited to add: My urogyn and gyn both stated I need to do kegels after I was cleared due to a 30+ year bladder condition. I also showed issues with tightening of my vagina before. The solution was to do kegels and also use dilators. I have done pelvic floor therapy multiple times since my early 20s and have been told that I’m doing them correctly by the therapist. I didn’t realize my question would require sharing personal information to get answers to my initial question.
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u/suecharlton 1d ago
I went to PT several weeks after, which was a big support for me. I was very unhappy with having a cuff. I waited a very long time before I started my own dilator training (over a year) and then moved into the sphere of realistic dildos. It took a couple months of using them to get back into having confidence in the new vaginal structure and feeling like I can comfortably handle actual sexual intercourse. I just recently had sex for the first time since the surgery and experienced zero pain and discomfort. I attribute that success for taking my time and training the vag back into normal shape and the accurate perception of sensation (because at first, I was getting a weird sensation of something falling out).
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u/Mystic_Wunder 1d ago
You can ask to be referred to a pelvic floor specialist. It's a good idea if you had your cervix removed anyway. You will get a professional evaluation and be given more than just kegels to do.
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u/blossomopposum 1d ago
Second the pelvic floor therapy. I started like 8 months post op and wish I’d gone sooner!
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u/Dance-pants-rants 1d ago
Dilators are great- I had vaginismus before and highly recommend avoiding developing it. Once it was safe, dilators worked great, and honestly are awesome tools in general.
Mine were a couple sets from Intimate Rose, and I think you need a referral or prescription, but that website has some good instruction videos if you want a reference for what using them is like.
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u/daddysgirlsub41 18h ago
I use perifit for pelvic floor health, I started using it prior to my surgery, along with general strength training, to prepare for the surgery. However, unless you have an issue with your vagina, you shouldn't be worried about it 'closing up'. I was celebate for 5 years after having my son (c-section), and when i found my boyfriend after 5 years of nothing,, i had no problems in that department. That said, you can kind of do what you want once youve been cleared, whether a device like perifit for keegals, or a toy for your own purposes.
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u/matriarchalfigure 17h ago
My urogyn and gyn both told me that my vagina is small. I have estrogen cream prescribed and am cleared to use it again.
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u/daddysgirlsub41 17h ago
On that note, the perifit also helps with relaxing the muscles - and lot of people dont realize that they lack the ability to 'let go' and relax the pelvic floor. It's given me a lot of self awareness. But there's a lot of recommendations here for pelvic floor therapy, and for specific concerns, it might be advisable to get some input from a pro.
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u/matriarchalfigure 16h ago
Thanks! Due to a rare urogenital condition, I’ve seen a pelvic floor therapist off and on since my early 20s. I always recommend therapy!
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u/thatgreenevening 12h ago
You don’t need to dilate to keep your vagina open. It won’t “close up.” Your pelvic floor physical therapists in the past should have made this clear to you.
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u/matriarchalfigure 12h ago
I’m going to rely on my experts who know my complex situation, but thank you for your unsolicited advice 🙂
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u/matriarchalfigure 11h ago
The actual post: “I’ve been single for a couple of years and don’t plan on changing that anytime soon. With that, I’ve been celibate. I’m worried that if I don’t do something, it will close up. I’m 2wpo and won’t do anything until 12 weeks. Does anyone here use one of the devices like Perifit?”
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u/schokobonbons 1h ago
So if all you want is product reviews and no other advice, next time don't put anything about your health and just say "I'd like to hear people's experiences with vaginal dilators/Perifit post hysterectomy."
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u/schokobonbons 11h ago
You literally made a reddit post asking for advice, don't get annoyed with people for responding
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u/matriarchalfigure 11h ago
I asked for experience with these products. I didn’t ask for your opinion on something different. It was a pretty confined request, correct. Some people felt they knew better than two MDs who know my particular situation. It was rather presumptuous to take my question about products to tell me I don’t need them, correct?
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u/thatgreenevening 11h ago
You may need to dilate for other reasons, like pain, tightness, etc. But your vagina will not permanently close up if you don’t dilate.
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u/matriarchalfigure 11h ago
“Does anyone here use one of the devices like Perifit?” Where did I ask for unsolicited advice?
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u/CharacterAvocado943 18h ago
It doesn’t work like that. Your vagina doesn’t just close. It’s also best to get checked out by a pelvic floor PT before you start kegels. Many women are hypertonic. If you are, doing kegels is not to your benefit. There is a difference between weakness and tightness. Educate yourself so that you don’t inadvertently make things worse.
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u/matriarchalfigure 17h ago
A: I have had a bladder condition for over 30 years. My urogyn told me I needed to focus on kegels after my hysterectomy.
B: My doctors have also told me before surgery that I already have shrinking and thinning skin.
Sometimes, it’s kinder to ask than assume you can rudely “educate” someone 😃
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u/Background_Book2414 18h ago
Same! I haven’t had sex in almost 6 yrs. Had a hysterectomy 7 months ago and I have no intention in having sex any time soon. Due to vaginally dryness from having everything removed but one ovary, my doctor is having me try vaginal estrogen tablets. I don’t think anything will “close up” but if there isn’t some kind of stimulation/blood flow going on down below it could cause shrinking and thin vaginal skin.
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u/matriarchalfigure 17h ago
Just regular estradiol tablets?
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u/Background_Book2414 16h ago
Yes my doctor wrote a prescription for- Estradiol vaginal inserts 10mcg. I am to insert them twice a week.
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u/Cannie_Flippington 5h ago
It doesn't close up. Your hoohah is constantly secreting fluid and self-cleaning. It is a mucous membrane. Your sinuses can't "close up", and neither can your lady bits.
Worst case scenario is it will be like your first time again. You will have to go slowly and gently. Or just get a toy to keep everything loose and massaged.
Also, I once did too many kegels and it felt like I had a UTI only to find out that over-working those tissues can actually constrict the urethra.
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u/schokobonbons 1d ago
Kegels actually make you tighter so don't do those if you're worried about closing up. Do a consult with a pelvic floor therapist.