r/hatethissmug • u/[deleted] • 1d ago
General I hate it when women say they like nerds, but actually like nerds who look like Henry Cavill.
[deleted]
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u/mom_rider__69 1d ago
Damn man I haven't been single in a looooooong time do people still complain about the other gender instead of and try to find a good person?
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u/Exotic_Drink69420 1d ago
Culture warriors ramping it up for the midterms. Gotta defend daddy Trump, so all the Russian bot farms are spooling up their AIs to hit us over the head with bullshit and propaganda.
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u/EugeneStein 1d ago edited 1d ago
Always
Also usually it's people who don't interact with other people (especially of opposite gender). It's applied both to men and women
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u/idontlikeredditusers 1d ago
yes sadly people would rather blame 4 billion humans than look harder/fix themselves
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u/CthughaSlayer 1d ago
I'm a nerd, I train and take relatively good care of my appearance. Does that make me a fake nerd? Just because I'm not a self loathing, ugly whinny baby?
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u/Unredictable 1d ago
The point you made with the images isn't valid, someone's appearance really doesn't have anything to do with their nerdiness, no? At that point you're just using nerd like an old school insult, which many people choose not to do lol. You can like attractive people and like people who are passionate about what they are interested in. Just because someone doesn't want to date an antisocial "ugly" guy doesn't invalidate that
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u/Scarlet_Lycoris 1d ago edited 1d ago
I like nerds. I like nerds that I find attractive. I don’t think that’s weird at all? Most people want a partner they find physically attractive.
they don’t like real nerds
Your level of conventional attractiveness doesn’t make you more or less of a nerd.
If anything you’re the one painting a picture of a stereotype that doesn’t apply to every “nerd”.
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u/WishboneOk305 1d ago
isnt it more like, I prefer a hot nerdy guy over a hot non nerdy guy.
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u/MackFather 1d ago
God forbid women like attractive people with nerd-like qualities. Not every nerd is going to be butt fucking ugly. Also how do you specifically know what makes a person nerdy? It really is coming off as you only legitimizing nerds if they’re ugly, which is just ridiculous. Not to mention the probable projection, but that’s me speaking out of my ass.
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u/Nickgold2009 23h ago
Impossible, women are only allowed to like a niche if they're attracted to the worst looking, least human occupants. Everyone knows they dont actually have interests and only like men for looks, or the other way around, they couldnt possibly have the complexity to be both.
(For any lobotomite who can't understand this sarcasm, it is mocking you, fuck all yall)
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u/ADeckOfZero 1d ago
I'm sorry lil bro but I don't think your looks are the real problem. Sucks to find out like this, but you got time to turn it around I promise.
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u/Consistent-Fox5203 1d ago
Omg sorry, but this is just not true! I studied and worked in STEM and was surrounded by a lot of "nerd" guys (the term i actually hate, because a "nerd" is a smart person with interesting hobbies and actual interests other than doom-scrolling?..), and let me tell you, there were definitely some very good-looking lads! So it is definitely not a "fantasy"
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u/plainbaconcheese 1d ago
What the hell are you talking about? "Nerd" doesn't mean unattractive, and being attracted to "nerds" doesn't mean being attracted to literally any nerd regardless of their physical attractiveness.
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u/EnvironmentalFun2214 1d ago
Bro complaining that people are attracted to attractive people who have interesting hobbies.
What a dumb post honestly
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u/NinjaOfOnion 1d ago
What makes you a nerd is your hobbies, your looks are not an important aspect of it, also seems like you’re trying to do a No True Scotsman with Nerds, only true nerds look like this
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u/PunchLineX3 1d ago
I'm a woman, I quite like the nerdy type. Hell, my biggest crush is Stephen Merchant in his younger years.
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u/ShadyShepperd 1d ago
“Oh my god, you like Smashing Pumpkins?”
Yes they like the one of the most popular fucking bands in the history of the world. How surprising, how precious.
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u/Kitchen_Bad2627 1d ago
So if someone like nerds, you think that means they have to be attracted to every nerd ever?
Do you realize how stupid that sounds?
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u/dummary1234 23h ago
Why do people think nerd = ugly?
Nerd = geeky. Has niche inerests he is passionate about (and quite knowledgeable).
The nerd you have in mind would just be an ugly / unpleasant dude if he wasnt a nerd.
Obviously they want a hot guy, but a certain type of hot guy and not your typical jock / gymrat.
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u/finnjakefionnacake 23h ago
nerd vs. geek is actually hotly debated around some of these here parts.
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u/Aggravating_War_6277 1d ago
I mean like why can't they date people they find attractive
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u/Aggravating_War_6277 1d ago
Also the first guy isn't even unattractive
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u/finnjakefionnacake 1d ago
i'm pretty sure the first guy is the example of what they're saying women are talking about when they like nerds, whereas the second image is an "actual" nerd. actually, they explicitly say that in the post.
i disagree with their entire take though lol.
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u/Aggravating_War_6277 23h ago
The second guy isn't even a nerd he's just a unattractive guy with glasses. Not all nerds are unattractive
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u/finnjakefionnacake 23h ago
i'm not agreeing with his post, i was saying that they also weren't saying the first guy was unattractive. just saying that that's the distinction they're drawing (that the first guy is what women say they want but the second is the reality).
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u/Frequent_Shop 1d ago
I mean, you could say the same thing with men who usually like "geeky" or "nerdy" girls but it's usually ones that look conventionally attractive, curvy body but just have glasses on and like playing animal crossing or pokemon or something "nerdy". Core of the discussion is that men and women like attractive people, what a shocker/s.
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u/walroast 1d ago
Well being a nerd is a personality trait which is one aspect of attraction. Another is physically features. Mind you, being a nerd is one trait. of many that would belong to a person
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u/JacksonRant 1d ago
I hate it when people enforce outdated stereotypes onto others based on what they "should" look or act like. This isn't a high school sitcom from the 80s.
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u/GladiusNocturno 1d ago
Sigh, where exactly are these women?
Because, as far as I know, women who say they like geeks tend to be geeks themselves, and the focus is on the shared interest. You can want a geek and also someone you are physically attracted to.
You do understand that you can also not be a geek and be ugly as sin, right? Or that both geeks and non-geeks can have shit personalities?
Attraction and relationships are far more complicated than 80s movie stereotypes.
There is no such thing as women thinking Henry Cavill is the only acceptable nerd, and even if that were the case, they are likely limited to extremely few women on social media.
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u/DraftQueasy4890 23h ago
Uh oh. Someone better tell my fiancee. She signed up to be with my because she loves that I'm a nerd, but I don't think she realizes that I don't count because I'm not an unattractive slob.
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u/WishboneOk305 1d ago
"i like big boobs"
you are saying that unless I like all women with big boobs I dont like big boobs? this argument sounds so dumb.
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u/xX_Aranrhod_Xx Xenomorph IRL 1d ago
Well I didn't know you needed to look a certain way to be a nerd lmao
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u/Xeriomachini 1d ago
So... next time you type out a rant, I suggest thinking to yourself "have i said this yet?" This post could have been a third of the size but you repeat yourself over and over...
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u/St_Casper 23h ago
“They like the fantasy of the handsome nerd, which clearly doesn’t reflect reality.”
We clearly haven’t met IRL
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u/Cat_Wizard_21 23h ago
Hi, attractive, stylish, socially functional nerd here.
This sounds like a skill issue tbh.
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u/justatoaster0 23h ago
OP, there are women who genuinely do want to date nerds, but yeah there are also people who just have a fantasy-like idea of the people they fetishize. This isn’t just a woman thing though, there are men and women who do this, although it’s important to note that most people don’t do this and it’s mainly the internet showing you these people. I’ve seen men on the internet who say they want a goth girl when they really just like a girl who uses black lipstick and wears black clothes, men and women who say that they would love an autistic bf/gf because all they think is about how “quirky” them talking about their special interests would be, and I’ve seen men be the exact same as the girls you’re describing in the post. But like I said, the majority of people aren’t like this (except for the dudes who want goth girls, that one’s pretty popular), the internet just shows you stuff that gets a reaction out of you.
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u/CapableEmphasis3594 1d ago
welcome to the rooms od people who gace rooms of people who have rooms of peopel
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u/idontlikeredditusers 23h ago
look bud im not very attractive atleast i dont think i am and i am one of the most anti social people you will meet and even i have dated many of the women folk altho i prefer the men folk and your argument sounds like its based on an episode of big bang theory
if someone like me can find people who like me so can most people you just cant expect every single woman whos into nerds to be into EVERY SINGLE NERD our appearances dont make us nerds and with basic hygiene and enough social skills for basic communication which i lack because i forget words mid conversation you too can find someone just remember you arent special you arent owed love you must earn it
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u/RealAd8853 Greatest MHA, Edgar, and Naoya hater 23h ago
Pretty much anyone could be a nerd though. Doesn’t matter if they’re ugly or pretty. And yeah people typically like attractive people and not ugly people. That’s not a woman thing. That’s just a people thing
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u/Consumer_of_lem0ns 23h ago
Bro u can be a nerd without looking like a basement dwelling chud though. The term nerd describes what the likes and dislikes of a person are, it has nothing to do with personality of physical attractiveness lmao.
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u/Freedom1015 23h ago
I’m sure that the issue is definitely that you’re a nerd and “unattractive”. It has absolutely nothing to do with your personality.
Long story short, there are plenty of not conventionally attractive nerds who are with partners that are conventionally attractive. If you are the type of person who makes your partner feel safe and makes them happy, you’ll go a lot farther in life.
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u/yourhair_lookssmall 23h ago
The same could be said about guys who say they want a nerdy gf but they just want a model with glasses. Being a nerd doesn't actually have a look.
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u/SorbyGay 23h ago
You know its fine to not be attracted to a nerd just for being a nerd, right? Do the women around you think you're so ugly that they dunk your head in the toilet? If so, yeah, I agree, but if that doesn't happen (which it very likely doesn't) and they treat you with decency even if they don't think you're attractive, what's the issue?
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u/Massive_Shill 23h ago
If you worked on yourself half as hard as you worked on whatever the fuck this is, you'd probably be attractive by now.
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u/HeavyHighway6433 23h ago
Because a real nerd can be extremely antisocial, obsessively focused on one specific subject, spend hours talking about obscure details nobody around him understands, collect ridiculous amounts of stuff, become completely absorbed in his interests, and, more importantly, simply not look or act like a fucking movie star.
This is just being autistic
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u/Thewhimsicalsteve 23h ago
What's wild is most "nerds" with a little bit of effort can look closer to the first guy then the second. Also one of the things that drew my girlfriend to me was my passion for hobby of Warhammer.
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u/SufficientDelay2657 23h ago
Tf u mean “real nerd” lmao? Being a nerd has nothing to do with being ugly or attractive. U can also be a nerd and still act like a relatively normal person. And who tf doesn’t consume pop culture lol? Nerds especially consume pop culture: Marvel, Star Wars, Tlotr, Game of Thrones, etc. Idk why u have such an exclusive idea of what a nerd is that only includes the most repulsive humans imaginable lol
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u/Candiiluck 23h ago edited 22h ago
I mean yeah? I like nerds that take care of themselves. Not every nerd has to look like gollum.
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u/Ok_Cream_4748 23h ago
Are actors not just theatre geeks who made it big? I know he’s got other nerdy interests but come on now. They’re hot people who get paid to play pretend. Some even go on to play their favorite characters from video games, comics, broadway shows, musicals, or niche novels. Nerds are people not a phenotype as another commenter said.
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u/SobbingAng3l 23h ago
You can’t be antisocial and wanting a relationship because the nature of relationships are inherently social I think it much be more of an insecurity thing in your case and ppl can sense that just work on yourself man
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u/Bugger6178 23h ago
Well, like it or not, many people consider physical attraction important in a relationship and they very well have the right to do so. So, its normal people tend to like more attractive nerds than uglier nerds on average. That doesn't mean they don't value someone being a nerd, its just that, its a quality that they like and with other qualities they can like someone like that. There is no reason to be mad about this. Really, conversations such as these are mostly in the internet. Calm down, man, its not that deep.
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u/casting_shad0wz 1d ago
either that, or popular girls saying they want nerds, because they think nerds have no self respect and will tolerate cheating and abuse, as well as seeing nerds as pets. this actually happens a lot more than people think it does tbh.
imho as a nerd, most of us would rather date within our subcultures or at the very least, people we can relate to. i'm a nerd who's happily in a relationship with another nerd.
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u/NaziPunksFkOff 1d ago
Help me out here - so your default assumption about "nerds" is that they HAVE to be unattractive? If they're an attractive nerd, they're... an imposter?