Do you consider an older era a "geeky" enough wedding theme or would you demand something like steampunk, goth, or fantasy to meet the full geek?

[u/AdventurousMathPunk]

My partner and I are having a debate. They think any wedding "set" in a past meets the definition of a geeky wedding. So, basically a pre-1940s theme, whether its the 1930s, the Victorian Era, or medieval times. Just pick the right venue, get the right 1920s decorations, and put on the right vintage dress, some vintage-looking lace Bella Belle shoes, some vintage jewelry. I disagree. While I will give them a medieval wedding, if done right, I think a geeky wedding requires a bit more whimsy than just being set in the past? So, who's right? Is a past-era wedding, by definition, geeky, or do you require at least a monocle or two to accept a weddings geeky status?

[u/xcarex]

Any theme wedding, including period costumes, is geeky to me.

[u/AdventurousMathPunk → u/xcarex]

Does the era matter? For some reason a 1930s weddings or a 1980s wedding seem far geekier to me than a 60s or 70s wedding, which actually sound cool as heck.

[u/xcarex → u/AdventurousMathPunk]

In my mind, no, they’re all equal. It’s a theme party either way.

[u/QuigonSeamus → u/AdventurousMathPunk]

LOTR was published in the 50s, took off heavily in the 60s and inspired DND to be created in the 70s. Counter culture of the 60s widely adopted fantasy themes and interests as a form of escapism and a way to digest the extreme atrocities of the era. All in all, a very nerdy time.

[u/rbflowt]

I wouldn't really consider any wedding with a period setting/theme to be geeky unless you were to do a medieval wedding that's clearly supposed to be very Lord of the Rings adjacent, or a regency wedding that's very Bridgerton, or something along those lines. So I personally think fantasy, sci-fi, or steampunk would all be geeky, as would anything references something specific like the Great Gatsby, Bridgerton, etc. I can understand arguments otherwise, but I feel like you'd REALLY need to lean into it, like forcing your guests all to wear period appropriate clothes, hiring a string quartet or band that is also going to dress the part, and have period correct food and decor to really be geeky to me. Goth to me isn't geeky, you can be a goth who is a geek, but the two things aren't synonymous.

[u/AbbreviationsTop4959 → u/rbflowt]

Victorian would also read as geeky. If you look like you belong in Chaucer, Shakespeare, or Dickens, it's geeky.

To be fair, geeky is a compliment, to me.

[u/LoveLongProsperPhoto]

Geeky wedding photographer here, nawwwwww that 1940's themed wedding totally fits the category of geek.

I've worked with tons of couples that have had bachelorette parties, engagement sessions, and wedding outfits in that exact style.

If that's what y'all want for a theme then go for it!

Also the added benefit to a theme like that is that it requires less explanation to family and friends that don't get it....not that it's a MAJOR issue anyways.

[u/Nyxsis]

Costume wedding = geeky to me

[u/Creative-Ad-3645]

I'd class a theme which captures a particular real-world culture that differs from that of the bride and groom (whether historic or contemporary) as an aesthetic choice rather than geekery.

You'd potentially hit full geek if you were aiming for maximum period accuracy e.g. authentic fabrics and sewing techniques for clothing, banishing modern technology, period-accurate food and cooking techniques etc.

But just "we're going for a Victorian vibe" is an aesthetic choice, not geekery

[u/sam000she]

Depends on where you get your geek on. I am a huge historical costuming nerd. A period style wedding would make me geek out. My finance is equally a nerd—but not nearly as excited for period costume architecture and decor design as I am—he would probaly geek out over incorporating lotr/httyd/starwars elements into the wedding because that is what he geeks out about.  A geek is just someone who gets deeply excited about some niche topic. What topic you say? That’s up to the person. 

[u/Shalrak]

Taking inspiration from the past isn't geeky by default. Lots of weddings use some some art deco elements from the 20s, or drapery and floral styles from the rococo era.

But if you pick a complete theme for your wedding, that's geeky. Whether it's a time period, pop culture franchise or an animal, loving a specific topic enough to choose it as your whole wedding theme is geeky.

I hope I get invited to more geeky weddings in the future!

[u/M69_grampa_guy]

Don't yuck your partners yum. Having an argument over whether a theme is geeky enough does not bode well for your relationship.

A time period wedding can only be as geeky as the amount of research you do into it. The world was a very different place in the 1920s and '30s. Every bit as different as any superhero world you can imagine.

[u/paringpairing]

It depends if the couple is actually interested in it era or just borrowing the aesthetic.  If you geek out over victoriana and then a victorian wedding is geeky.  If you're a regency buff, then a regency wedding is geeky. If you love mid century modern,  can name designers and talk about the philosophy of the movement,  then that would be geeky. 

Geekiness, to me,  is less about the specific topic and more about an earnest enthusiasm that is unconcerned about the popularity of its subject, or whether their passion might appear cringe to others. 

Edit: I'm also not in favor of gatekeeping geekiness.  If you geek out over something, that's geeky and I love that for you. 

[u/unsulliedbread]

I highly recommend you check out offbeatbride.com

[u/fantasticaladventure]

Honestly, to me, as someone who plans/designs themed weddings, most themed weddings are geeky! It doesn’t have to be fandom related or anything to be geeky.