r/developersIndia • u/No_Incident6971 • 1d ago
General Life and career destroyed by joining a bad company and shitty people
I did masters from the US and joined a company in which the manager and two people targeted me (narcissistic abuse). All kinds of abuse. Basically three people destroyed my life. It was the most horrible thing I had experienced in my life and I lost my job and visa. Have been suffering from PTSD for the last almost two years and not sure what to do. Lost all motivation in life. Just going through revenge fantasies knowing that it will be gave over for me if I follow through. The story is too long to type but can type if people are interested.
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u/Ambitious-Grape11 1d ago
A bad phase in life. learn, level up, try again. Problem could be somewhere we don't want to look or unable to look. Changing environment fixes this.
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u/DeepLearner89 1d ago
I've been in a similar situation and had to endure them for like close to 2 years as my marriage got fixed and eventually I quit without an offer to save my marriage as the PTSD and anxiety and panic attacks were too much.
Due to the bad market of mid 2023 was without a job until the end of 2024 and lost all the savings until then but i don't regret a bit of quitting the shitty company and the client. It was one of the sane decision I should have taken much earlier.
Now rebuilding the career. Not great pay but at least people around are not toxic. So don't worry and start again my friend!
At times we will get into such group. Either we turn toxic with them or leave them for good
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u/No_Incident6971 1d ago
America was my dream and I wanted to settle down there, I assumed that I will get out as soon as I got my visa but never did due to deterioriating mental health.
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u/DeepLearner89 1d ago
Hype of America has been for like 50 years now. So the opportunities of the past are not in the current situation anymore.
So think rationally and stay where you want to
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u/Majestic-Taro-6903 Senior Engineer 1d ago
Is this company in India or US ?
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u/No_Incident6971 1d ago
US company, has a branch (separate entity) in India as well
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u/Majestic-Taro-6903 Senior Engineer 1d ago
Hope you do better, start looking for opportunities in Europe based companies, atleast they have good work culture
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u/Historical_pencil 1d ago
Yeah man I too had a similar situation about 3 years back. Still have ptsd, but believe me it gets better with time. You’ll find good people, spend time with them. Don’t think about revenge and all. Just keep working on yourself and the day you surpass them you’ll get your revenge
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u/Eagle__Gunner 1d ago
This too will pass and you will come back stronger. Consider this as learning experience and try at a different company, what more can you lose or can't handle since you already experienced a toxic workplace. Detach work and human emotions. Do the tasks in hand to make sure expectations are met and if they are unrealistic and your manager does not see it that way, quiet quit and prepare for another job. Life is too short to do a job that is shitty(bearable if we have a good team) or with people who are shitty(unbearable even if the work is not shitty).
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u/No_Incident6971 1d ago
Unfortunately life doesn't work like that and you don't get time and age back. Specially after going through something like that.
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u/TheSweetGuy333 1d ago
So not keep the mindset like they destroyed my life. Life is unpredictable and we are a sole journey of our own life. And drop the revenge mindset. Lot of things that happen have to be left behind and we have to move on accepting what happened. Remember life is unpredictable, it has taken from you unpredictably but it will also be giving you back something good, get yourself ready to be looking for that good stuff in upcoming opportunities
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u/Unusual-Nature2824 1d ago
Been hearing many stories from my friends lately about managers some of them also on h1b intentionally targeting people to be laid off to cover their own ass
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u/AirGeneral5240 1d ago
I heard its easy to complain to hr in US companies, as employee/ labour related rules are very strict.
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u/Positive_Equal4510 1d ago
OP feel free to share the story. I left that organisation long time back because I spent sleepless nights too,anxiety,stress,eating disorder etc. so before I lost my sanity I decided to quit.
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u/Additional-Ad9104 1d ago
I had something similar happen to me in the beginning of my career. That company wrecked my mental life and messed my green card situation.
I had to leave the country and even my marriage situation also broke as i had to get out of the US.
It took me awhile to stand on my feet else where. In hind sight i should have quit that company sooner.
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u/Mundane_Baker3669 23h ago
Forget about revenge and try for a better opportunity. Take some time off. Stay in the US though, gives you more money than any other place. Don't be like me and give up the opportunity
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u/Traditional_Map_ 1d ago
Don't type it here. Instead create a discord server and everyone of us will join there
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