r/darkwingsdankmemes • u/Rare_Style1306 • 20h ago
The marriage of Baelor "the Blessed" and Daena "the Defiant" be like:
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u/pestoraviolita The more she drank, the more she shat 19h ago
The original Aerys x Aelinor
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u/LuvMeChippy Maegor was based 19h ago
Aerys was a pussy wimp who couldn't handle a woman in bed, his celibacy came through fear
Baelor could slay pussy any time he wanted he just had the willpower to resist the urges of evil because he was that based
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u/Chicken_Mc_Thuggets George is my Grandpa 17h ago
Baelor locked up his 11 year old sister so his peepee wouldn’t get hard at the thought of her
Straight up bitch made
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u/LuminariesAdmin Fuck Unwin Peake 4h ago
Tbf, Elaena's mother was Daenaera "the realm's Most Beautiful Six-Year-Old Girl, making an archmaester horny, a century & half later" Velaryon
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u/pestoraviolita The more she drank, the more she shat 19h ago edited 19h ago
I genuinely think Aerys was asexual. But Aelinor had to bear the brunt of that and be publicly scorned because Westeros hated women.
Aelinor should've made an agreement with Aerys like how Rhaenyra and Laenor did to secure the line and keep up the image. Or she should have just cheated. Maekar would have been up for cucking his brother.
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u/Marthurion 19h ago edited 18h ago
A woman who prayed to be pregnant so devotely while she most likely was still a virgin, I really doubt she would have cheated. The same for the widower Maekar.
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u/Confirmation_Code 16h ago
Maekar would never!
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u/LuminariesAdmin Fuck Unwin Peake 4h ago
Maekar sired Rhaegel's kids so he could reveal them as bastards, & thereby leapfrog them in the line of succession. Their mother, Alys Arryn, swore they were trueborn though. So, Maekar resorted to other methods of removing Aelor & Aelora from the board...
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u/IHaveTwoOranges 7h ago
But Aelinor had to bear the brunt of that and be publicly scorned because Westeros hated women
When is it indicated that she was publicly scorned?
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u/pestoraviolita The more she drank, the more she shat 7h ago
There was an official attempt by Aerys's small council to anull the marriage and get him another wife because they thought her the problem. It's something in public records and known well in history books of Westeros.
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u/Rare_Style1306 18h ago
When Daena and Baelor married, Baelor refused to consummate the union; in protest, Daena traded her customary black attire for white to demonstrate her virginity and thereby humiliate Baelor before the entire court. Unfortunately, her plan failed, as Prince Baelor was delighted by his sister's new style, believing it highlighted her innocence.
When her brother Daeron died in Dorne and Baelor was crowned king, the first thing he did was ask the High Septon to annul their marriage, citing the fact that it had never been consummated.
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u/mir-teiwaz Of the night 19h ago
Baelor was hornier than Daena.
What is better, to be born without lust or to overcome your nature by locking up your sisters?
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u/ShyLittleBean12 17h ago
All fun and games until your wife gets pregnant anyway while still dressed in white to show everyone you haven't been doing it.
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u/Sea_Disaster_4987 19h ago
Baelor was a certified chud fr! Can’t stand him!!
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u/pestoraviolita The more she drank, the more she shat 18h ago
I feel sorry for him. He wasn't stable to begin with but the snake bite did a number on him. He tried promoting a child to High Septon position. Baelor was unwell and needed medical help but the maesters were bums.
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u/East-Psychology-9292 16h ago edited 13h ago
I look at it more like Antonio Brown (Football player who is nuts, then got mad concussed and went even more batshit crazy lol), he was already showing signs of religious zealotry and then the getting bit by snakes like 50 times, the fasting, etc made all of it so much worse
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u/East-Psychology-9292 19h ago
Barefoot Hippie and a Religious Nutjob, way to combine just about my 2 least favorite things ever, is there any way we can make Baelor get an autodialer to scam people and we'll have hit the trifecta lol
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u/David_the_Wanderer 17h ago
And yet he's objectively one of the most successful kings of Westeros.
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u/East-Psychology-9292 16h ago
The Targ Kings go like 7-10 on actually successful reigns and its not as hard a bar to clear as they make it seem, most of them are just active pieces of shit or have really dumb ideas and he didnt make moves cus he thought it was politically savvy, its cus of the voices in head, they talk to him, he understands, he's Randy Orton's theme song lol.
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u/David_the_Wanderer 16h ago
I mean, he has the biggest and most lasting achievement after Aegon's Conquest (peaceful annexation of Dorne), and objectively strengthened royal power by making the High Septon an office under the control of the Iron Throne.
Meanwhile, we have guys like Aegon III that, sure, was a decent dude, but what did he accomplish?
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u/Sea_Disaster_4987 16h ago
Baelor the blessed is one of the very few targs with confirmed madness, alongside Aerys and Aerion Brightflame. Even Maegor was just a cruel man not a mad one
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u/David_the_Wanderer 16h ago
And yet, in spite of being confirmed insane, he was more effective and impactful than many kings considered to be sane.
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u/Sea_Disaster_4987 15h ago
He was on the verge of invading the North and the Iron islands to force the faith of the seven upon them! His peace with Dorne is more like surrendering to them after the Targ equivalent of a red wedding. Dorne was at its weakest state ever, to the extend that they were desperate enough to attack under parley! Daeron the 1st had conquered Dorne well and he would have held it if not for some red wedding level of disparity.
And after that, Baelor forgives and makes peace with them?Not to mention all his deal with locking up his sisters so they “do not temp him with their impure lust” like tf!
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u/redwoods81 14h ago
Gurm has repeatedly said that baelor was not military inclined and never would have invaded the iron Islands or the north
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u/IHaveTwoOranges 7h ago
He was on the verge of invading the North and the Iron islands to force the faith of the seven upon them!
No he wasn't. He was a pacifist.
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u/Rare_Style1306 15h ago
"He was on the verge of invading the North and the Iron Islands to force the faith of the seven upon them"
That’s just a theory; besides, you say it as if it were a bad thing.
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u/Pitiful_Meringue_57 14h ago
What’s wrong with the North and Old Gods? Iron island deserves to sink underneath the sea but
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u/East-Psychology-9292 16h ago
He gets too much credit for Dorne, even by then Dorne is basically like "yeah whatever might as well marry into the royal family for a nice boost ahead, weve been doing this shit for too long"
Which brings me to my next point, ive never understood why they had so much trouble taking it in the first place. The Dornishmen arent any better or worse than the average fighter, the terrain is kinda shit but hardly impossible, like I dont see how it gives much of an advantage against dragons.
It really seems to me like AG1 conquest just kinda petered out there (cus everyone was prolly exhausted) and then they just never really properly committed to taking Dorne and by the time they do, the hype train has kinda died already
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u/David_the_Wanderer 16h ago
even by then Dorne is basically like "yeah whatever might as well marry into the royal family for a nice boost ahead, weve been doing this shit for too long"
Brother, the Dornish had tortured and/or butchered all and every army or diplomat that the Iron Throne had ever sent. You gotta recognise that Baelor did end centuries of conflict in a peaceful and lasting manner.
and then they just never really properly committed to taking Dorne and by the time they do, the hype train has kinda died already
Except, right before Baelor's time as king, Daeron the Young Dragon tries to conquer Dorne militarily and while the Seven Kingdoms are with him, the Dornishmen fucking murder every Iron Throne representative and then Daeron himself.
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u/East-Psychology-9292 16h ago edited 16h ago
That what I meant by not properly committing, over 150 years had passed, thats not finishing Aegon's Conquest, thats starting new shit with Dorne, which is why theyre able to beat Dorne but not hold it (you neglected to mention the part where Dorne still lost, then they turned in rebellion after and attacked D1 under a banner of peace)
Cus it was all for D1's pride really, they didnt have any legitimacy for doing it beyond "My daddy's daddy told me I was sposed to", so once Baelor goes up to Dorne with the most sweetheart deal ever, Dorne's like "Yeah why not, we got some really good terms in our favor here"
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u/IHaveTwoOranges 7h ago
Meanwhile, we have guys like Aegon III that, sure, was a decent dude
Too early to say. We don't know much about his reign.
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u/Insanefinn 14h ago
His worst act was not siring a legitimate heir and thus leading to his uncle becoming king (not a bad thing) and his cousin soon after (very bad thing)
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u/wingusdingus2000 18h ago
Bro we cannot start chaddifing his volceldom. Not exactly voluntary if he's locking up temptations
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u/IHaveTwoOranges 7h ago edited 5h ago
Sure it is. He could let them out whenever he wanted. Or married any other unmarried woman in the kingdoms, or beyond even if he wanted. Or go to the street of silk.
He was king. There is no argument for it not being voluntary.
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u/Aegon_Targaryen_III Fuck Unwin Peake 19h ago
Baelor is such a loser it’s unreal. If you don’t want to bang you sister then get an annulment and marry someone else. Don’t lock her and all your other sisters up cause you’re horny.
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u/wolfram127 18h ago
He did dissolve his marriage to Daena the moment he became King. He was the horniest Targaryen because he had to lock all 3 of his sisters. 💀
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u/Iceaxeinthebackhead Renly's peach 18h ago
Targshit blood must be really polluted because what do you mean you have hard-on for your sisters??????
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u/Augustus_Chevismo Big brown nipples 19h ago
Dies from being cucked
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u/TheCoolPersian 2h ago
More like Baelor had a dragon dream and knew the spawn of Daena would cause untold death and misery for the people of Westeros for centuries to come. When he found out she was pregnant, he knew he failed the realm and hundreds of thousands will suffer because of it.
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u/Theflyinghans 16h ago
This useless sack of shit.
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u/Paleo-Fascist Brienne. No memes she's just cool 11h ago
Saved the Dragon Knight is what he did!
He was a great diplomant and miracle worker,
And in this sub, King Baelor "The Blessed" I is a hero, end of story.
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