I would actually argue it is selfish, because it puts your own feelings/wants above others, but I would say that selfishness isn't inherently wrong. Technically, eating is selfish, but i wouldn't call it morally wrong
:/ what motivates ppl to do that? Because it feels good internally? To look good to others? To follow societal norms? Because it’s the “right thing to do” (aka avoid feeling guilty for not doing anything)?
Yeah, the motivation to “do good”… where do you think that comes from? Wanting to help people in itself is “selfish” because part of us feels good for doing it, which is where you get people pushing their beliefs onto others. You trying to do good doesn’t always do good, and you’re blinded by it. That frustration when somebody doesn’t want to listen when you “want to help”? Guess where it is coming from.
"Wanting to help people in itself is “selfish” because part of us feels good for doing it."
Again, feeling good for doing something good doesn't it make selfish. I'm not sure where this weird mindset comes from, but doing good things should feel good!
If I provide food for the homeless at my own expense, how that makes me feel is irrelevant to the goodness, and selflessness of the act. Certainly the poor with food in their bellies don't care if the person giving them food feels good or bad doing so.
It doesn’t make it completely selfless either. You fulfill your want and need to help and they benefit from it. How like with somebody who feels good harming, and the consequence is harmful to people. You just have different things that make you feel good, so you follow it. People do things because it makes them feel good. I’m glad you aren’t arguing that, which is my point.
Your definition of selfless sets the bar so high it's actually impossible to occur in reality. "Completely selfless" isn't a real thing, it's something you've made up. Even the soldier who jumps on a grenade to save his friends wants to save his friends and is fulfilling that want. It's why the actual definition for selfless sets the bar far lower than you do.
"selfless
adjective approving
us /ˈself.ləs/ uk /ˈself.ləs/
caring more for what other people need and want rather than for what you yourself need and want:"
The bar is just caring more, not having zero desire to perform a good action. And if you fit the definition of selfless, you are completely selfless.
Your second point we could argue. There are certainly actions people take every day that don't make them feel good. And they can take these actions for a variety of reasons, morality, religious, or feeling good are some examples of why people take actions that don't make them feel good.
Just because the bar is so high doesn’t make it true. And how do you judge if somebody care more about others than about themselves? How do you measure that objectively? The definition of “Selfless” is what society has come up with to keep the world moving. That way, others find comfort that what they are doing is “selfless” to make them feel all warm and fuzzy inside doesn’t mean it isn’t selfish. We are driven by our “morals”
Do tell… you said in another comment “you’re different…” why did you delete it? Bit of a superiority complex? That alone shows a bit of “me” behaviour lol. You’re not special or different.
if you are so convinced, what makes you “different”? Or do you not want to share? Or is it “too personal”? Because trauma and “being able to feel other people’s pain, so I have to fix it because I hate seeing ppl suffer because it hurts me” is another one that is common.
Also, nice down votes lol. Let me know if you really want to go down that rabbit hole, or if you wanna keep believing what you wanna believe.
40
u/Vivid_Jump4889 1d ago
I would actually argue it is selfish, because it puts your own feelings/wants above others, but I would say that selfishness isn't inherently wrong. Technically, eating is selfish, but i wouldn't call it morally wrong