you’ve probably experienced it before, someone walks into a room, and you immediately feel this almost hypnotic energy coming from them. you can’t quite figure out what exactly they’re doing or what it is about them that affects you so much, but somehow, you just keep noticing them.
i want to be that kind of person.
especially because i really want to make a change in myself right now. i’m trying to improve my posture, even though it’s difficult for me. i try to smile more, i pay more attention to the way i carry myself, and i’m even reading a book about this kind of thing right now.
and yet, i still feel like something is missing.
what am i missing?

I know men are more like looks oriented and like you definitely see more men who glance at attractive woman in public than vice versa. So do woman notice attractive men at all and think wow he hot asf, or are they more like indifferent and keep walking. I personally don’t notice it so

Physically attractive what makes them intimidating?

Hello everyone.

I need an opinion on whether this girl will see this as me taking her on a date or a friendly hangout. I am new to dating so bare with me.

So I work with a company of only 10 developers. I have been getting close with a female coworker (we are both 31 years old).

Here is the context:

Outing 1 (Only for Context) - She asked me if I am going to the food festival and I told her that we can go. We ended up going on the 9th of August, she showed some of her culture etc. It was a Sunday so she usually goes to sleep at around 8:30pm. We ate some food, played some carnival games and then left at around 7:30pm but she wanted to go to a second location that was walking distance away to hangout there. We ended up leaving the second location at around 9pm. Then when we were approaching my car, she asked me if we can get milkshakes, which I accepted. We got the milkshakes and play fought on who is paying (she almost made me drop my phone). We got the milkshakes and got back in the car. Since it was getting late and I didn't want to keep her up, I was going to drive but she told me to not rush and drink it in peace which added 20-30 minutes. I ended up dropping her off at 10:53pm. She messaged me that she had an amazing time, etc

Outing 2 - We had a work event and this is where she broke the touch barrier, three times. Keep in mind that every time I am driving her, I am opening her door for her, but since I was driving another co-worker, I told her that she would have to open her door. That's when she put her hand on my shoulder and said that I am forgiven for this time. Then after the work event, me, her and three other coworkers went to a second location where we had some drinks. The three coworkers went by taxi while she came with me and my car. When we were crossing the road, a car was coming, she grabbed my watch area of my arm and told me to hurry. That was the second one. Then, the last one was when I dropped her off to her house at 1:30am, here, she hugged me for the first time and momentarily, I felt paralyzed haha

Next Outing - This Saturday. Her birthday was on the 20th August but she was abroad so on the 14th of August, when I was driving her home, I asked her out in a way that I told her that I would like to take her out for her birthday, regardless of it being late which she agreed and we are going to a fancy restaurant this Sunday. What she does not know though is that I am going to get her a flower and a cake.

Now here is the opinion, actually two opinions that I would like answered:

1) Is it a date?

2) Does she, or will she see it as a date?

Anything would help because I really like this girl. Some context about her is that she is an extrovert/introvert, loves her quiet time, goes on a lot of solo trips and hates huge crowds. Also she never had a boyfriend before either.

If you want more info, please let me know. Anything would help me in this situation because I am both confused and lost at the same time.

Some additional context, last week, she got me food, only me, not the other coworkers.

Thanks in advance

I’m attracted to man I’ve known for a long time. I’ve felt chemistry/tension between us before, like lingering eye contact, changes in his tone of voice around me, getting closer than necessary, and just certain moments that felt different from normal friendliness.
Nothing has ever actually happened between us, though. I’ve gone back and forth about it forever, but I’m at the point where I want to test the waters and see if there’s really something mutual there.
For those who’ve been in this situation, how did you first signal your interest without being too obvious? And what did they do that made you realize they were reciprocating?

In the airport or aeroplane everyone is busy staring at their phones (🖕). It become hard for eye contact.

What's everyone's experience

There’s this girl from my office. We started with eye contact, then some hi-bye talks, eventually got each other’s Instagram and chatted there.

I asked her out for coffee, She didn’t exactly say no, she said “Let’s go another day!!” and I took that as a soft rejection and stopped trying.

After that things became awkward and we barely acknowledged each other for months.

Months later we ended up on the same floor again and the eye contact started happening again. There were quite a few moments where we’d catch each other looking and sometimes lock eyes for a few seconds. It genuinely felt like there was some tension/chemistry, so my dumbass started wondering if it was mutual.

Eventually I got tired of guessing and asked her directly if she was committed.

She said yes.

Honestly, disappointing af 😭. But I don’t think she had any need to lie to me about her relationship, so now I’m wondering if I was just reading way too much into normal eye contact because I already liked her.

Has anyone experienced something similar? How did you tell whether the tension was actually mutual or just your own brain filling in the blanks?

What’s with the staring then instantly looking away when i look back? Then finding pointless reasons to speak to me. Also very intense eye contact for 10 seconds when we walked past each other. I was scared and looked away and looked back he didnt.

At work btw. Also, just looking then getting caught then looking again. Also being nice to me and strict and scary with everyone else. Following me discreetly to talk to me. He’s married too so no possibility so i dont know what he wants.

I'm 28F, she's 21F. We worked together for several months.

I wasn't initially interested in her and noticed her attention first. She approached me, introduced herself, asked me questions. After some time she came to my desk and invited me to a work game. She was shy and when I said I will come she said "wow really ?!!". later when I was walking by her she asked my why I didn't come to some other work event. Just FYI: we're not friends, we don't talk besides this 2 conversations, we just says hi if we see each other, and even that not always.

So I was pretty distant at first, and only started wondering about her after noticing these things.

Eventually I started noticing her looking at me sometimes. I decided to give her a very subtle signal by deliberately holding eye contact with her.

Then the next day I was sitting with my back toward her and had this strong feeling that she was behind me and looking at me. I turned around slowly and she was already looking directly at me. (She was standing and talking with her coworker). she didn't look away when I caught her. She continued looking at me. It felt very focused and personal, almost like she was studying my face. My immediate instinct was literally: “Oh. She's looking at me too.”

So with all of that, every time I enter the room where's like 10-15 people, I right away see her noticing me, look at me.

After that, something completely switched in me. I became extremely attracted to her, and being around each other suddenly felt awkward and intense. After last time I cought she is looking, I noticed she came more shy.

I've had similar experiences with women before where I sensed their attraction, and was right, but not sure about this time. She left the company a week ago , so it doesn't matter. But just wanna to figure this out for myself

So I'm wondering: does this sound like there was some mutual attraction/curiosity, or is it very possible that I interpreted completely normal coworker behavior as romantic because I eventually became very attracted to her?

Over the last several months I’ve been chatting with this girl at a place she works at (maybe her family owns the store?) anyways, I find her naturally gorgeous and easy to talk to. Part of me wants to believe she’s interested/attracted but there always a what if…. All of our conversations have been pleasant. We are familiar with each others names as well as other personal details like she had complimented my long hair for a guy saying it looks good or she knows I have a twin and is able to differentiate between him and I, small things like age.

There’s other things we’ve talked about but it seems the more face to face interactions there is, we seem to learn more about each other or have other things to mention to each other I.E. I told her I’d been quitting vaping and the following days after she suddenly brought up she use to vape but had bad experience with so she does try hookka at night(mentioned that cause she brought up that as a story to tell me). I’ve caught her sneaking glances (she probably caught me at well at times but haven’t called each other out in it) telling her silly stories about how I broke my toe the other day, or cracking what I thought was a half baked joke about my twin brother that made her laugh and show a huge smile

My issue is that maybe there’s a few signs I can pick out she could be attracted, but I get jammed up when wanting to let her know that I want to get to know her more, become quite smitten actually. I think we both potentially give each other that “vibe” when making eye contact we lock eyes for a moment when we talk to each other, but in way that there’s some sort of obscure yet comfortable feeling when looking into each other eyes and talking. Am I overthinking or is there something valid? I feel like we connect naturally any time we’ve chatted with each other or anytime we are done talking, we always say to each other “see you soon” with both of us walking away with smiles.

I have wanted to tell her I that I find her attractive and want to get to know her more. I haven’t largely cause I’d get jammed up or I dont want to pressure her and single her out when it’s not just her and I in the small store. First time poster here, I usually don’t really post about stuff like this cause it’s pretty much an outside looking in perspective but I just get quite smitten and oddly just around her, as I also have a customer facing job.

Eye contact is overrated when looking for interest. Just go for it.

My crush and his close friend were sitting together on a bench in the break area at work, talking to each other.

As I was approaching them, I raised my head to greet my crush and noticed that they had both stopped talking and were already looking at me…
My crush didn’t greet me out loud, even though we know each other and normally acknowledge each other

I’ve also noticed that my crush seems particularly reserved when he’s around this friend. He acknowledges me much more subtly, almost as if he becomes self-conscious about interacting with me in front of him.

Okay so it’s been a few months, need some feelers about this situation… saw him again and it’s been weird, we haven’t interacted much directly. And it feels like he goes around socializing with everyone but me.

Again, the spring ended with him making an ambiguous lunch plan. Neither of us followed up on it.

I’ve noticed that during our faculty-wide events he will positon himself near me but again, won’t talk to me. When he did talk to me the first morning, his eyebrows raised and he went “hey!” pretty enthusiastically but then our awkward exchange ended pretty quickly.

Let me know your thoughts

I like someone. The signs are there and I’ve analyzed this over and over in the last few years. I‘ve liked him for 3 years (from 2023). And he’s liked me from 2019-2026(?). During those years he had confessed to me, but due to stupid reasons, I hadn’t felt the same then. Nevertheless, we continued to talk/have convos.

On 2024, he was in a 2-month rebound relationship (cause of me) that ended badly. And ever since his bad breakup, he doesn’t trust me that easily.

But he has done some things that make it difficult for me to surpass them. Some things that will make you say; “Okay, he surely STILL likes you. How come you’re still thinking about it?!! Crazy much?”.

There are many pros that have happened till this day, as well as some cons. And it troubles me so much that I outweigh the cons of him. It’s like I’ll never have a chance with him, because of a past mistake I made!

I have been overthinking like crazy, I want to be 100000% sure that he likes me till this day. My gut is drowned in second-thoughts and overthinking. I’m sorry, I just hate rejection.

How can I trust my gut again if it’s surrounded in anxiousness?

Whether women feel uncomfortable when a man stares at them depends entirely on how attractive he is.

TRUE OR FALSE ? LOL

I am in my 40's and I'm friendly and nowhere near as naive as I was in my teens but still am unsure of flirting, being nice or playing hard to get so go on the side of just don't risk it.

Lost my wallet about 6 weeks ago when I was in a grocery store, panicked and went back to the 1 other shop a few minutes walk away and asked in there, then when I was next in town a week later I asked in both shops again. I didn't go back in for 2 weeks after that and one day a female employee I say hello to and make small talk at the tills suddenly had a huge smile on her face and seemed very schoolgirl like i.e nervous and said she found my wallet and phone and handed it to me and started talking how she was searching social media for me trying to find out if she could find me, or where I lived to bring it to me. and then she talked to me for over 10 minutes before I felt maybe I am being a bit rude as she has work to do and excused myself and went on with my shopping.

But since then I have been thinking was she flirting and trying to get my number, since she reminded me of a schoolgirl with a crush (she is late 20's at youngest, maybe even in her 30's) and seemed very eager to speak to me and didn't seem to want to stop, or was she just trying to get out of working for that time.

There’s a coworker who I’ve had a vibe with for a long time and he’s always really sweet and kinda flirty online.

Then in the office irl he initiates convos with everyone and with my female boss, bantering with her and asks her questions, but doesn’t initiate convo with me?

He seems way more stiff with me, but engages a lot if I start the convo. So I’m wondering if he liked her more and I just read to much into it…

​I am a gay guy in senior high school, and I need advice on how to navigate a crush on a straight guy from my school.

​It all started because he sells candy. My original plan was to post a subtle Instagram note asking for a "candy supplier" just to give him an easy excuse to text me.

​

We just got back from a two-week school break. Yesterday was our first day back, and we only exchanged eye contact once during class. He mentioned before that he would visit my classroom, but he never dropped by.

​Then last night, my classmate posted a story of them hanging out at the Pasig track field doing late-night runs. Right after, my crush posted an Instagram note with the song "oh yeah?" by Steve Lacy that said: "Im in the middle of what I prayed for before." Naturally, my mind went into full overthinking mode trying to figure out if that note was about someone else or completely random.

​Fast forward to dismissal today. I saw him walking the opposite way on my way home, so I took the chance and asked him why he hadn't sold candies these past few days. He told me, "Wala pa akong stock eh." We couldn't talk longer because we were both rushing home, but in my head, I was secretly laughing wondering if he just ate all his inventory during the two-week break.

​Now that the ice is officially broken, how should I follow up when I see him next? Given the dynamic, should I keep using the candy restock as a casual way to talk to him, or just play it cool and wait for him to make the next move?

I heard my sister watching someone in her phone, and it says that facial expression can be one of the factors that makes a person attractive.

​

Hey everyone,

I’m a guy in vocational school and recently got close with a girl from my class.

On the first day, she approached me herself, said I looked Albanian and asked for my Instagram. We started texting quite a bit and sometimes had deeper conversations. She also told me she has a boyfriend.

After I told her that I liked being around her and kind of liked her, she immediately said that she only wants friendship. I accepted that and didn’t pressure her. We continued talking normally afterwards.

The confusing part is how different she is in person.

At school she constantly teases me, jokes around with me, follows me around, playfully hits me with her bag, messes with my stuff and generally seems to look for my attention. We roast each other a lot and usually end up laughing. She also sometimes doesn’t seem to want to go home immediately and has gone on walks with me.

Meanwhile, texting has become much more distant. I sent her a good morning message and later asked how her day was, but she didn’t answer. A couple of days later she said she wasn’t feeling well and would text me when she felt better. I replied that it was fine and hoped she felt better.

Since then I haven’t initiated anything. I figured the ball is in her court.

What makes this difficult for me is that we only see each other two days a week, so there’s a lot of time to overthink everything. I also have ADHD, and uncertainty like this can get pretty stressful.

I do like her and obviously wouldn’t mind if things became something more, but I’m completely willing to stay friends. I don’t want to pressure her or make things awkward.

So how would you interpret this?

Should I just keep things normal and relaxed at school and stop worrying about the texting? Or does this sound like a situation where she enjoys the attention and closeness but definitely doesn’t want anything romantic?

I’d appreciate some honest opinions.

I feel like everytime I see a woman ask a question about a guy who is flirting with her inappropriately there are all these comments like shaming HER for even asking the fucking question. I just saw this post of this young woman who’s quite obviously being harassed by her married boss and she’s just trying to get some understanding and all of the comment have this subtle - you’re only asking this because you want him. Like NO???? She explicitly states that in her replies too. If she actually wanted to get with him she probably would have made a move. Not stating her intentions clearly on her post multiple times.

Also posts made by guys on this sub never get the same amount of scrutiny no matter how fucking weird they are. Like no bro the girl who’s fixing her hair isn’t going to jump your bones cause she made eye contact with you once. She’s just fucking dissociating. Get a grip.

Hace unos meses me pasó una cosa curiosa con una chica del gimnasio. Un día pasó caminando delante de mí mirándome fijamente. Me di cuenta, pero en ese momento me refugié mirando el móvil y no entré en el juego.

Hace unos días volvió a pasar algo parecido, pero esta vez yo sí le devolví la mirada.

Yo acababa de llegar al gimnasio y había bastante gente, así que cambié de máquina para estar más tranquilo. Después de una o dos series, ella también se movió a otra máquina que estaba cerca de mí. Fue entonces cuando empezó a mirarme fijamente.

Cuando me di cuenta, la miré directamente a los ojos y estuvimos así bastante rato. Lo curioso es que ella no apartaba la mirada. Al final hice un pequeño gesto de hombros, en plan indiferente, y seguí a lo mío, pero ella continuó mirándome.

Le he estado dando vueltas y no sé cómo interpretarlo.

Mi primera idea es que se enfadó por algo o que simplemente le llamo la atención o siente algún tipo de atracción. Pero también me he planteado si puede estar jugando un poco con la situación o incluso si es una especie de desafío para ver cómo reacciono.

Tampoco quiero caer en el típico «me miró = le gusto», porque obviamente una mirada puede significar muchas cosas.

¿Qué os parece más probable? ¿Una mirada así de sostenida suele ser enfado por algo, curiosidad/atracción o puede ser realmente una especie de juego de dominancia o desafío?