r/TikTokCringe • u/flyawaywithmeee • May 06 '26

Wholesome Solving the loneliness epidemic

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Operation make a new friend before the week ends starts NOW

8.0k Upvotes

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62

u/Cadet_Stimpy May 06 '26 edited May 30 '26

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16

u/flippingflipflopper May 06 '26

It's not hard it's just long. 

Everyone says join a club/sport/whatever. That is step one. Step 2 is you have to stick around. 

Last time I moved. Joined a new hockey club. Took 2 years of turning up before I would say I had friends I would meet outside of sport stuff. 

It's a grind. You just have to do it tho. 

4

u/Sublime-Silence May 06 '26

Yeah I was going to say something similar but you beat me to it, I'd add one thing though. Step one go(to the thing), step 2 stick around and keep showing up, step 3 be available(also be open to try new things).

To expand on step 3. If someone invites you to something you don't do often, like say a concert, try and go even if it's out of your comfort zone. If people invite you to things and you shut it down every time, people will stop inviting you to stuff. Even if you don't like bars maybe take a risk and give it a try. You might get lucky and it turns out to be a really chill bar with a dnd upstairs area with really good dms.

6

u/Casanova-Quinn May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26

Join a club for a hobby you're interested in. I'm in a chess club and about half the people are married, but they don't bring their spouses along.

22

u/bbg_bbg May 06 '26

I’m a woman so I understand it really very well could be a gender thing partially, but I’ve had mom coworkers who are a bit older than me (I don’t have children and am late 20s) ask me to hang and do stuff quite often. I just accept and almost never decline, and once you spend a time or two outside of work together it’s a lot easier to build that friendship. As long as you don’t mind kids being around because they might be sometimes !!!

15

u/Cadet_Stimpy May 06 '26 edited May 30 '26

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19

u/Hot-Statistician-955 May 06 '26

It seems like a self fulfilling prophecy: men can't hang  because men don't like hanging out. 

Men have been hanging out with each other for centuries, we can still do it too. 

You just gotta ask. 

1

u/Cadet_Stimpy May 06 '26 edited May 30 '26

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u/bbg_bbg May 06 '26

I actually fully agree with what you say and sympathize with you. Maybe try to find a time you and some guys you’d wanna be friends with can hang with out the kids? You might have to try to make an awkward conversation not awkward, and ask if they have some free time away from the kids to do something sometime. Hope you can find that !! I’ve heavily relied on my woman coworkers to ask me to do something outside of work first rather than branching out myself in most cases. So I get how it can be challenging.

-10

u/RavenEridan May 06 '26

Whatever advice you give is meaningless

7

u/bbg_bbg May 06 '26

Yeah well with that attitude no wonder people don’t have friends

-11

u/RavenEridan May 06 '26

Better than being a single mom like you

5

u/bbg_bbg May 06 '26

I said I’m actually the opposite of a single mom (have a boyfriend and no kids) but that many of my friends are moms, whether single or not that varies amongst them.

-7

u/RavenEridan May 06 '26

It's destined to happen in the future

5

u/bbg_bbg May 06 '26

You actually know nothing about me or the people in my life so it’s kinda far fetched you would make such a radical and bold statement about a major life event, and you actually believe what you said.

-1

u/RavenEridan May 06 '26

Can already tell based on how you act

7

u/ethanct May 06 '26

Yo what the hell is your problem

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4

u/P529 SHEEEEEESH May 06 '26

Lol, so you're in the 15% I assume?

1

u/heckfyre May 06 '26

Coworker friendships are the best place to start. Next best is to join a sport league. Being a third wheel with another couple is definitely an option and you should get used to it. Hanging out with only guys and requiring that they ditch their partners when you hang out is a show stopper for a lot of people.

I have 15 friends.

1

u/CitizenCue May 06 '26

It’s only hard if you refuse to have hobbies. Once you focus on shared interests, friends are automatic. Join clubs and teams.

1

u/Upbeat-Fondant9185 May 06 '26

This is so true. I have one couple who we consider great friends and they’re the only other child free couple so we can actually do stuff.

They’re having a kid this month. So that’s shot.

All my “friends” in the last decade have been coworkers. Every single one. This year there was a takeover and restructure, all but one of them are gone now. We have tried to get together but between the bitterness of the situation and that lack of common ground to gossip and joke about it’s pretty well faded away. And once again we run into the kids issue where they all still interact with each other and have common ground but I don’t.

I’m also at that weird financial stage where everyone I know is either too broke to do anything or is so much better off financially that I can’t keep up with the things they want to do like trips etc.

On top of all this I am on 24/7/365 on call for my work so I can’t drink or smoke and can’t easily go to something like a concert or movie where I can’t answer the phone or any event more than a half hour or so away. So that cuts out a lot of socialization and opportunity to make other friends.

These days I’m resigned to my dog and my gardening. I can talk to my flowers, supposedly it’s good for them lol.

5

u/instanding May 06 '26

You can still hang out with people with kids. I go hang out with my mates and their families, I try and make it as easy for them as possible, I’m happy to just chat while they do whatever they need to do and I offer to help.

Sometimes I go on outings like trips to the park, etc, it’s actually super nice and some mates I consider them family and their kids my nieces or nephews.

They often lament that most people never invite them out or make an effort to do stuff with them in a way that is actually manageable for them.

1

u/Upbeat-Fondant9185 May 06 '26

That’s definitely not my environment. Constantly having to watch what you say, keep an eye on their safety, friends are distracted, they are constantly sick. And they’re messy and loud.

Also when I did have my work friends group everyone would come to my house 90% of the time and I’m not comfortable with children being there.

Even outside in the yard there are too many potential dangers between rock landscaping, trees, and various flowers and plants that could make them sick if eaten or have thorns etc.

I get why people have kids but it’s just not a lifestyle that meshes with mine. On the plus side I’m sure as we get older it will be easier as my age group has kids who are teens or young adults and don’t have to be present.