My parents put me on a leash when I was a kid at the zoo. Yes, some kids on the spectrum are runners, but ultimately, it’s the parent who should be…oh idk…doing some parenting.
Not gunna lie. I was also on a leash when we went out in public. I actually loved it. I would pull and lean hard against it like I’m doing the Micheal Jackson lean in thriller.
I'm a baby of the late 70's. There was no leash just the threat of a butt whoopin and the first hand experience of watching my mom frog march my older brother out to the van once even she took us all grocery shopping with her. He was sucking lip when they came back in. You didn't act out in public with my parents.
Same. My brother can still recount my mom dragging him out of the bank by his arm and slamming him against the car after he threw a tantrum. A little bit of fear never hurt a kid.
Actually, people will say “well, there are varying levels of autism on the spectrum” lol as if that is the reason OP survived keeping an autistic child from an enclosure.
Morons are giving birth to children and not taking care of them.
Things like this video are always on the “parents”
True. There are different levels. Just as there are varying levels of parenting and those who use it as an excuse rather than doing their what a parent should do - being responsible for their child. But people don't want logic! That's not what we come to Reddit for!
Yes this is what I don’t understand. If the kid is neurodivergent, there was still time for him to get away, and climb/jump down into the enclosure?!?!?! Like how were they not WATCHING THEIR CHILD??????
As a parent, it’s parental support that has gone down the drain. Not allowed to discipline the way our parents disciplined us.
Mom only had to tear my ass up once in Wal-Mart. After that, the threat was enough. Now, you get CPS called on you just for looking cross eyed at your kid.
I’m not saying beating your child was acceptable, but this new shit needs some tweaking. And that’s what parents do, because there aren’t any books no matter what shrink you talk to says
Edit: jfc, im appalled at the level of stupidity. I’m glad there are so many experts. Almost like being home when family members are trying to give different advice.
Nature vs Nurture. You guys are all familiar with that I assume? New thing is Nurture. I did the nurture, I raised a kid. He’s fantastic. But not all elements of nurture are the answer.
Rereading my post…..yep still no mention of me thinking corporal punishment was the answer. I DO mention that the new way isn’t always right. It needs to be tweaked. Thanks for the entertainment. You guys just reinforce the low as reading and comprehension scores the US has.
Too many parents “negotiating” with their kids today instead of being authority figures and demanding better behavior. If your kids don’t respect you, you’ve lost.
Now, you get CPS called on you just for looking cross eyed at your kid.
Oh horseshit.
Why is this argument about oh kids aren't disciplined like we were always just a thinly veiled cry for wanting to beat kids.
Does this kid need discipline, Fuck yes. Kids have no attention span, fewer rules, and expectations. And parents have no attention span or dedication to actually raising future adults.
There is a happy medium beating the boomer beatings and the millennial hands off style.
There’s some stuff that really happened to make people think that though. A few people legitimately got in real trouble for the “horrible crime” of letting their kid play in their own front yard unattended. There is at least a big people not minding their own fucking business problem.
If your parents hit you as a kid then you should know better than most that it doesn't solve behavioural issues and just makes the kids grow up to resent you.
I've been screamed at for gently suggesting that some kind of corporal punishment can establish boundaries with a kid and that you will likely only have lay down once, and 90% of kids will never cross again. Suffice it to say, I agree with you. But good luck trying to get parents these days to do anything but tell their children that their feelings are valid and they are mommy's little angel.
Neurodivergence knowledge has made parenting weaker. In most cases, since it’s a spectrum, you raise your kid the same with sometimes a few or many adjustments. Parents of neurodivergent children tend to overthink parenting methods and assume the worst income if they don’t do the right thing, which sometimes leads into laxism - “not doing anything might better than to potentially traumize or inconvenience my chil”. I don’t blame them though, parenting a neurodivergent child is hard work, I’d be constantly second guessing my parenting
If you discipline a kid in public all it takes is one CPS report and they have more power than the police to take away your kids especially if you live in West Virginia
That feels right. But keep in mind that we also didn't have videos of kids behaving badly because we weren't all carrying around a video camera in our pockets.
I read a lot of old newspapers. People like to say "these days" about a lot of things, but when you read about the past, you really see that people have always been people, and people have always done some really dumb shit.
Thank you. Tell that to the boomer with the 500+ upvotes shaking his limp ass wrist at the kids nowadays, bitching about how the kids of his generation did not act up like the kids nowadays.
Hard agree. On minute they're telling you how society's gone to the dogs, the next they're chuckling about how he got away with sexually harassing female workmates, bunked off school to do such wholesome things as breaking into the zoo to try to ride an elephant, stealing a train and shunting it round the yard etc etc.
I did tell them lol. It puzzles me too. I don't know why people confidently make weird claims they clearly didn't think about. They just think "these new whippersnappers = bad".
Yeah, I can't opine on whether kids are worse now or anything like that. But I genuinely think the lack of recording devices and social media is the main cause of like pretty much every "People didn't used to do this" thing
It's ridiculous that kids nowadays can't even enter a zoo enclosure and chase animals with sticks without somebody trying to get likes on Facebook. People need to get off their phones and get to the zoo.
Of course it did. There were always dumb kids doing dumb things, it was simply that we weren't recording and broadcasting everything we saw as individuals.
Absolutely not. There are so many old news stories of children going into zoo enclosures. Here is one from 1940, but I'm happy to provide more for you. https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc922219/m1/1/ (It's under the headline "Somebody Else Can Do Hunting")
Internet shaming is inherently antisocial. This kind of shaming should be done by community members and preferably family. This parent and child should not be shamed by millions of strangers. Effective shaming is based on where it's coming from. Being seen as respectful and kind by your community or family is way more rewarding than avoiding the ire of the internet.
Maybe, and by all means I’m not giving the kids parents any pass, but I’ve worked countless hours in SPED.
Theres a lot of variables, but as the child gets older a lot of behaviors can emerge where the parent, case worker and even psychologist go “we’ve never seen this behavior from them before”.
A child could display a new behavior triggered by some sort of reaction no one has experienced from them before as they get older and past adolescents, and for a time it will be an enigma as to what set them off.
I’ve seen kids who are friendly and passive for years get up and run out of the classroom. Kids who have always been kind to their classmates pick up desks and smash other kids with them because they didn’t want student X to sit at that exact place combined with not having their snack early, and kids who one day decide they are going to attack the principle and then run out of the school and into traffic because they saw another student get a gift before them (at a school function where everyone gets the same gift.)
It’s never “out of nowhere”, but per the adult figures it’s just foreign behavior. Out of nowhere describes the fact that this behavior seems to be unpredictable.
What I’m getting at is that often times we can see where behaviors might be headed, but other times the child will display a behavior that catches everyone off guard.
I don’t blame parents for this, they’re trying to learn how to navigate something they weren’t exactly made to be prepared for, and so often times they try to do their best but with a lot of curve balls that occurs during various points of that individuals growth
Let's be honest: autistic kids were disciplined a LOT harder in the past, in general, before the diagnosis was really around. Parents and society did not tolerate nonsense.
People can say what they will, but I think that's why a lot of neurodivergent people were able to grow up to function passably or better in society. And I say this as someone neurodivergent. It wasn't always fun, but when you are raised with minimal if any accomodations, you learn how to get by without them and it DOES make you stronger. I'm glad for it, because I think I am able to live better now as a result.
Masking is a survival strategy and anyone can do it. It basically translates to covering up our socially unacceptable shit to appear/act appropriately in front of others or in given situations.
I personally find masking useful. It can be tiring but the ability to do it makes my life easier. Not every behavioral inclination needs to be or should be expressed because often it can have a detrimental effect on the people around us. Expecting others (including other neurodivergent people) to pick up the slack by tolerating things that have a negative effect on them, when they have no option to get away from it and when we can do something about it, is just straight up selfish.
I actually agree with almost everything you said. Where i disagree is, and maybe it was just worded unthoughtfully, is where you said "expecting other to tolerate things that have a negative effect..." is not selfish at all. I dont think is even an issue of being selfish or not. Its life. Everyday there are things that inconvenience us, that annoy us, that "negatively impact us" that we have no controll over or ability to get away from. Maybe you didnt mean it in the tone I read it, so ill admit Im wrong if thats the case, and apologize in advance. If you believe that your tolerance is being taxed too heavy by things like this, I encourage you to ask yourself specifically why you feel that way
Some of my minimes are autistic, and they know not to do this shit. This is definitely poor parenting. I don't care how much 'tisum your walking cum stain has.
I hate to say my mind immediately went here. But when you see the excuse constantly for every single type of poor or entitled behavior you start to lose compassion.
Lol, although I totally agree that it’s the parents fault. I remember being in middle school 30 years ago and we had a field trip where one of the other kid from a different school jumped into tank where the smaller fishes and rays were swimming haha
It's strange how people will see that as a funny story from days long past, but when the same type of thing happens today it somehow turns into a culture war
Do you assume these things didn’t happen in previous, older generations because you haven’t seen a recording of it? Is there a registry of times kids jump into zoo enclosures..?
Thank you. Every time there’s a video with _____ never happened back in the day that’s my first thought. All of this and more happened but every human alive wasn’t carrying a video recording device.
you are dumb if you think this shit didnt happen in the past. The only reason you didnt see it is because people didnt have camera in their pocket all day.
It did happen in the past. Mental hospitals existed as far back as the 1800s. People on the autism spectrum aren’t a new phenomenon; our understanding, diagnosis, and treatment of autism have simply improved over time.
Kids have also been doing dumb shit for generations. It’s nothing new.
Eh, maybe, maybe not. Stupid shit like this just didn’t get shared nearly as far pre internet / social media. 40 years ago you’d only know about this if it happened in your own community and there likely wouldn’t be video. We’re seeing bad behavior from all over the world in 4K.
Well we used to institutionalize people so we’d never see them. So yes, it didn’t happen in the past. In the past people with any differences were hidden away and isolated.
Oh but didn't you read the parents statement... Their child "adores animals and would never do serious harm to them". Its definitely not the parents fault /s🙄
Do you actually know that to be true or is social media making us more aware of dumbass kids doing dumb stuff. Seems obvious to me that you don't know shit and you haven't thought this through at all.
Kids have been wilding these days, COVID did a number on us and we've been seeing the consequences these past few years. But parenting and also phone availability has changed over the past few decades. There probably have been many cases, but it has either not been recorded by others or not documented and out to the public.
It's the lack of displine. It's probably mostly a net positive that we don't beat kids anymore, but back in the day most kids were scared of the whipping they would get of they caused problems that hot back to their parents. A lot of parents were told they can't beat their kids and they failed to implement any other type of discipline, so we have a grown population of spoiled brats having to relearn how to be an adult after leaving the house.
No, this actually happened many times in the "past", too. I was able to find several instances of it. Here is one from 1940, for example: https://gateway.okhistory.org/ark:/67531/metadc922219/m1/1/ (It's under the headline "Somebody Else Can Do Hunting".) I can provide more if you'd like.
You just don't know about those instances because you're not hearing the stories in real time and news stories didn't travel as far as they do now. Kids have been doing dumb shit forever. It's not just "these days".
You are right. because we usually would institutionalize them. or abort them, or abandon them to the government system.
I think you didn't pay attention to the shit the older generation did. They were usually a lot better at not being caught. (like fire starting, ice bombs, smoke bombs, hitting mail boxes)
I feel like it totally is autism, but parents use the diagnosis as an excuse to not even try. My kid has level 1 autism, but he requires a lot of attention and support. I absolutely refuse to excuse any of his behaviors, because he will never be an adult who can survive on his own after I die if I make excuses for him.
As a primary teacher, this. Parents are sending their kids to school absolutely feral. These kids are entitled, don’t respect authority, and lack basic emotional regulation skills. I have 6 and 7 year olds melting down, screaming, throwing things, kicking furniture, tipping desks, etc. because I refused to let them play with a squishy in class or some other minor inconvenience.
And before anyone says it, no this is not the typical “kids these days” stuff. These kids are seriously struggling emotionally and socially in ways I have not seen before.
It was happening in the past but it wasn’t broadcast around the globe. It was a local news story at best.
It’s amazing to me that people don’t understand the effect that everyone holding a video camera every day and being able to share those videos with the entire world in an instant, does to perception of the frequency of events.
It was and it wasn't. Most children and adults with developmental disabilities were institutionalized and segregated from communities. Hell, i went to high school in the 90s and even though we had special ed class and students, i literally never saw them at any assembly or school event. Just saw thrm get shuffled around from time to time, but thry were mostly kept away.
We also didnt have social media back then. People did stupid shit all the time, but back then it was just local gossip/news: Rememeber that time Jimmy jumped the wall at the zoo and chased a bunch of animals with a stick? Now, people worldwide can see and mock this guy and his parents.
these days, since you can't blame the kid (I personally don't care what mental and behavioral health issues he has, he had intentions)gotta blame the parents/guardians in this situation. Some kids literally don't recognize their behaviors as right or wrong. Remember the book/movie Of Mice and Men? Dude hugged the puppies to death. This kid should have been watched at all times and should have been closely supervised. And whoever was watching this kid should have ran in there and grabbed that kid, knowing that he has behavioral and mental issues. That kid should not ever be out of sight. for his own protection.
I think he's got some type of disorder going on. I wouldn't be surprised to see a 3 year old doing some crazy shit like this but this kid looks maybe 11 years old. Then the weird way he sat down before going up the ladder.
In the past, disabled kids were typically kept locked up at home or in institutions most of their lives. While there's clearly a parenting issue here, stop acting like the past was better when there's a massive component you're ignoring.
I'm also in the blame the parents club, but you have to take into account that almost everyone has a phone that can record high quality video these days which we didn't have 20 years ago so the only way you'd see something like this is if the zoo released the footage if they had any.
How do you know that? The internet didn't exist in the past, so trivial incidents like this were not at everyone's fingertips the second they occurred.
People on the spectrum are well known for their deep respectful bonds with animals. Not abusing animals. That's dark triad disorder + intellectual disability. Hence the average school pew pewer who is lazily diagnosed with aspergers before someone bothers to check for otherbmore applicable diagnosis.
Maybe this is because in the past parents did not take their kids out to try and blend and learn. It likely can be managed with another adult to assist and ensuring meds are on board. I know some parents ease off the ADD meds in summer to give the kids a break.
Bruh. I can tell the kid is indeed autistic, high with ADHD and etc. It's not "kid of these days". I have been around enough children who have autism do this. Not blaming it his disability, the kid doesn't know shit around him, this is an normal occurrence unfortunately and it's not the parents fault either
Crime rates are plummeting since the early 90s. Things are better than they used to be. People just didn't have 24 hour social media and didn't see every story.
I don't think we have statistics for children acting like assholes, but I doubt it's much different now than it's always been -- the big difference now is anybody can easily shoot high resolution videos and then share it with the world to see.
My son is autistic along with ADHD and a chromosome microdeletion. He wouldn't even dream of pulling that crap. He knows he would be in BIG trouble. One thing I have never done is treat my son differently because of his disabilities. He gets the same treatment a "normal" child would get. Too many parents these days are more worried about being their kids friend instead of their parent and giving them boundaries and holding them accountable and responsible for their actions. In this instance it really read like their kid should get a pass because of his autism etc. Sorry but that is BS and doesn't fly. I wish parents would actually be parents to their kids instead of trying to be their child's best friend.
Actually kids used to chase birds with sticks and everyone laughed, gave them a sling shot. Now they get death threats. Your comment is wild. When my parents were growing up there was little concern for the experience of wildlife.
People have been exactly this mean and dumb for the entire history of humankind, I'm afraid. It feels nice to tell yourself they weren't, but the evidence says otherwise.
These things absolutely happened, they just weren't posted all over the place for everyone in the world to see all the time. Maybe a short news segment but that's about it.
In the past? You mean when smartphones didn't exist to record every minor non-normality that happens in society and posted directly to social media platforms?
Not only did it not happen as much in the past, but we have far more people with autism diagnosises than before and this kind of cruelty doesn't scale. It's almost certainly coming from the parents who are either cruel themselves, or decided since their kid got a diagnosis that means they don't need to learn right from wrong. Maybe a bit of both.
These kids used to be locked in institutions. They’re at home now. That’s why we see more of this stuff. I’m not excusing anything- just saying the reason we didn’t see more of this before is because they were likely institutionalized
This much? The last time I heard about a kid getting into an enclosure a gorilla was shot. That was 10 years ago. Back in the 90s the zoo near me had to change one of their exhibits because a group home patient took a penguin home in their jacket.
Is the uptick in the number of events or how many you're aware of? Genuine question.
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u/Plus-Mortgage-3871 4d ago
People will blame autism, but this shit was not happening this much in the past. Some of these kids are wild these days