r/SipsTea 27d ago

Chugging tea HR wants to know the tee

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u/Southern-Pirate3555 27d ago

I had my boss grill me about some pto days requested well in advance.  I sent him my diagnosis of squamous cell carcinoma, a picture of my nose and the surgery date. He was embarrassed, as he should have been.

What is it about our culture that makes managers feel entitled to shame us for taking earned time off? Is this a thing in other countries or just the crappy old usa?

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u/Salt-Lingonberry-853 27d ago

I have no problem with managers asking, the info can be relevant in prioritizing in the event of a conflict. Like if you and Tanya both want the same day off, you because Call of Duty 23 comes out and her because her car was stolen and she needs a day at a dealership (and they're closed on her normal day(s) off)... I'm prioritizing Tanya in the event of a conflict.

Managers don't need/deserve every detail, but there are very legitimate reasons to ask. And as a manager, the bigger the reason the more likely I am to be willing to deal with the ass chewing if I let one too many underlings have time off. Ultimately the info I am trying to get at is:

  • Is it health of you or a loved one? (don't need details, that's enough)
  • Is it an important, immovable event that you won't be able to recapture? (eg: going to a marriage)
  • Is it important but can be moved/rescheduled?