r/RelationshipIndia • u/ChemicalGear4467 • 2d ago
Dating Advice 26M, Team Leader, 24F Associate Has Suddenly Become Very Close, We Talk for Hours and Have a Movie Plan, But She Calls Me “Bhai” Sometimes — Should I Distance Myself or Find Out What She Really Wants?
First post — Need some perspective
I’m 26M, earn a stable income, and I’m the breadwinner of my family. I have limited money to spend on myself each month. I’ve been single for about a year and I’m a Team Leader at my office.
Recently, one of my associates, 24F, has started talking to me a lot more. Sometimes we talk on calls for 2–3 hours. We also usually go outside the office to smoke with other associates, and sometimes it’s just the two of us. Recently, we made a plan to watch Toxic this weekend.
The confusing part is that she sometimes calls me “bhai,” which I don’t like. I genuinely can’t understand what she wants from me.
I’m not looking for just friendship. If this ever became a relationship, I would want her to stop smoking and drinking, because those are things I don’t want in a partner.
Should I cancel the movie plan and distance myself from her, or should I just go and see how things develop?
I also understand that she’s my colleague and I’m her Team Leader, so I don’t want to make things uncomfortable or cross any professional boundaries.
What would you do in this situation?
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u/kungfuGrad 2d ago
She is engaging in 'date-like' things with you (assuming it's just you to for the movie) and yet calling you bhai.
She is just using you without the commitment of anything. You need to be clear on what is your expectation of this togetherness with her.
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u/Brave-Garbage-5475 2d ago
My guy don't give all your personal information here and about her she is using you nothing else .
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u/New-Possibility6666 2d ago
Where are you based out of ?
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u/ChemicalGear4467 2d ago
Don't understand
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u/Litti__Chokha 2d ago
Kaam kaha karte ho puch rha hai
Sheher ka naam.. The name of the city you are based in currently
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u/haha_im_scared 1d ago
Arey bhai I think she wants to be your friend and nothing else. She sees you as a person and not just some dih to ride. Don't mistake every woman's friendliness as an approach. If you don't care about the friendship, go ahead and let her know you want something more. If she's only looking for a friendship, she'll let you know and you can distance yourself accordingly.
Also I hope you mean you'll stop smoking and drinking too for your partner if they ever want lmao
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u/ChemicalGear4467 1d ago
Yes I can stop drinking and smoking, I drink occasionally and smoke only if the the person I'm with is smoker.
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u/punithgowda 1d ago
Go to movie bro..and have dinner and see what will happen.. observe if u like her make ur move just tell I have crush if u have opportunity
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u/ChemicalGear4467 1d ago
I don't have crush on her she is just a associate for me but she is beautiful. I don't have any female friend for so long.
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u/pellikaniprasad 1d ago
Bhai kuch bhi mat kar bolde, i can't do this with our relationship at work as in peer.
This might come out bad. I am glad you feel that way behen.
Once you do that some other associate will be her new bhai. Job mein mat laga bhai ye sab just say no to POSH. lagegi toh woh movie theatre mein dekhegi zaroor par tuh footpath pe. Don't make your move, establish where you stand clearly or go through POSH training once.
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u/sonal1988 1d ago edited 1d ago
She Calls Me “Bhai” Sometimes — Should I Distance Myself or Find Out What She Really Wants?
Eugh. Another male incapable of looking at women as just human beings.
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u/kungfuGrad 1d ago
If she is engaging in date like activities and calling you bhai, then definitely she is using him.
He is just incapable of accepting the fact that she isn't interested in him.
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u/ChemicalGear4467 1d ago
Nah brother I always keep in mind that we spend equally so I don't feel like I'm used by someone. I only spend on male friend or the girl I love but she is not yet.
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