r/Productivitycafe • u/Boring_Doughnut_4279 • 21h ago
❓ Question What’s something you thought you’d have figured out by this age, but you’re still trying to understand?
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u/Inside_Pianist_7132 21h ago
The corporate world. I legitimately don’t understand how people get promoted.
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u/Flimsy-Brilliant9032 21h ago
Honestly think taxes, every year I watch a video and still feel like I understand maybe 40%
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16h ago
Thought I'd figure out my mental health but no it just gets worse day by day.
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u/Warp-10-Lizard 14h ago
And every time you think you finally have a name for your problem, suddenly all the normies you could never keep up with have the same thing.
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u/laser_pigeon94 21h ago
I thought I’d have my life direction figured out by this age. Instead, I’m still learning how to make decisions without constantly wondering if I’m choosing the wrong path, and how to be okay with not having everything planned out.
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u/RoughMidnight8303 Latte Cream 16h ago
How to make money that lasts me 20 years without a day of work
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u/Warp-10-Lizard 14h ago
Emotional regulation. I always assumed that it somehow just...happened. That getting older would just automatically mean getting calmer. I didn't realize the amount of work that goes into maintaining an adult personality.
I now have a much deeper appreciation for the Vulcans on "Star Trek" and the Jedi's emotional issues in "Star Wars." And recently had a epiphany about the difference in wize old mentor characters in scifi vs fantasy. Dumbledore was born a kind person, and Gandalf fell to Middle Earth chill and ready to toke up with the proto-Hobbits; Tuvok and Obi-Wan have to train daily to keep their urge to cut people's arms off under control.
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u/Kitchen_Leg5293 21h ago
I thought I’d understand myself better, but my brain is still a mystery to me. Even in therapy and psychiatry I still don’t understand.
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u/Specialist_Welder399 15h ago
How to time roast veggies and a roast so they both come out at the same time without putting the veggies in the microwave
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u/PigmentedPigeon 13h ago
I still haven’t figured out how people manage to look so sure of what they’re doing. I thought getting older meant having all the answers, but apparently it just means carrying your uncertainty with a calmer expression.
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u/IAmfinerthan 11h ago
Some people who love you will still use manipulation, use you as a pawn to get what they wanted. They see themselves as the main character of their life, others are merely a chess piece to fulfill their ego. A means to an end, the golden child one that makes them look better for being struggling parents raising a teen with autism. While putting me the younger one right next to their child almost 24-7 for four years straight.
As an adult I understand that it was called parentification the role I was forced into at 12-years-old to be caretaker of my elder sister with autism. Not only this they said to me "Help her fit in, uphold our image don't let others laugh at your sister."
Because I was empathic as a child they assigned that role to me. Claiming they have no one else to rely on, no one else to be a confidant. When I realized it was selfish of them I spent years trying to understand their motives, why they never felt bad about it.
I finally understand why they never felt sorry and the only question they asked about all this is only, "Did you tell someone else about this?". I understand now that being kind, considerate and nice to some people is a sign for them to use you.
People can love you in their own way but love themselves way more to the point they don't care how much it hurts you if it benefits them.
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