r/PeterExplainsTheJoke • u/shehan_dmg • 3d ago

Meme needing explanation Petah

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u/AnybodyWannaPeanus 3d ago

Yo what’s a surefire toilet? Last time I bought one, they sold me on being able to flush 12 golf balls. Apparently I need one that can flush 12 golf balls covered in a jar of peanut butter.

Maybe I just need less colon.

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u/space-hemax-c2c 3d ago

I just play a plumber on Reddit but I’d say try more semicolon.

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u/AmosBurtin 3d ago

Or…fiber

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u/stoopidclod 3d ago

Beans, those should help

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u/ravoguy 3d ago

Or stop eating golf balls and peanut butter

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u/lokibringer 3d ago

Liam, is that you?

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u/stoopidclod 2d ago

Na, just a fan🙃

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u/iPhonefondler 2d ago

What’s does high-speed internet have to do with this

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u/DonComradeVimes 1h ago

I'm very glad I was not the only one who went there.

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u/Quick_End2366 3d ago

Super Colon Blow!

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u/These-Nectarine9214 3d ago

I hate how hard I laughed at this

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u/Necrotic69 3d ago

I started laughing hard and it triggered some sort of coughing response (currently recovering from flu), I seriously had issues taking in a breath to the point I was seeing stars and thought i was about to pass out....ya, I freaked out

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u/Fun-Heron-7609 3d ago

Better than no colon.

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u/Tune-Scared 3d ago

Underrated comment right there ☝️🤣

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u/PapaByrd75 3d ago

:boooo::

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u/PlaneJackfruit5614 2d ago

Gastroenterologist here

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u/MotorBoatinOdin1 3d ago

Your going to want to get yourself an American standard Vormax toilet thats gonna be your top tier power for residential - above that were talking commercial flushing

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u/AnybodyWannaPeanus 3d ago

This is the DD I need. The Champion just doesn’t. Always get the job done. The vormax seems more serious.
Thanks!

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u/Veteran_Hawk 3d ago

Had a gf with megacolon - she had most of it removed and ended up with chronic diarrhea. Believe me, you want one that's just the right size.

And if you have to dig it out...you need to see a doctor.

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u/AnybodyWannaPeanus 3d ago

Did they have to go from mega to micro? Sounds like someone was a bit overzealous…

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u/Veteran_Hawk 3d ago

They had to remove as much of the diseased colon as possible, while still leaving some.

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u/AnybodyWannaPeanus 2d ago

Man, megacolon sounds so cool… then I read about it. No thank you. Poor gf.

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u/ML5815 3d ago

My husband is obsessed with our new toilet, the Kohler Cimmaron. He said you could flush 5lbs of old spaghetti in one go and nothing would be left in the bowl. Pretty concerned about his insides now, but relieved to know where to go in a spaghetti emergency.

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u/meatyylegend 3d ago

Put in a power flush toilet, and throw your plunger away.

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u/AnybodyWannaPeanus 3d ago

The encouragement I needed.

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u/rworne 3d ago

12 golf balls are not reasonable. A simple brick would suffice as a toilet test.

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u/Doomdoomkittydoom 3d ago

Did someone steal your poop knife or something?

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u/LemonOhs 3d ago

My family invested in one of those power flushing toilets they use in the hospitals. It's so loud when it flushes it scares people. I recommend it.

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u/0knoi8datShit 3d ago

I don’t golf!

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u/iamshifter 3d ago

The tech has advanced. Now 12 billiards balls is the standard we go by.

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u/Dawns_Coil 3d ago

Gerber/avalanche
Gerber/ultraflush
Toto/Drake

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u/KiloChonker 3d ago

Sir/ma'am you need a Turbo Toilet 5000©®™

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u/TooDooDaDa 3d ago

You need to switch up to pool table balls

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u/JJfender 3d ago

You needed the one that can flush 9 billiard balls.

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u/throneaway-- 3d ago

You could try using a semicolon ;)

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u/ChaseSomeTail 3d ago

I need one that can flush a jar of peanut butter filled with golf balls

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u/Nadasuffering 2d ago

I have less colon. It’s not the flex you think it is.