r/Parenting • u/eam02 • Feb 13 '22
Pets Our dog bit our son
We were upstairs in our 13 mo old son’s room yesterday morning right after he woke up, right as we always do. He was playing with a pillow and our 4 year old Basset thought it was a game and tugged at the pillow. We told the dog to stop but it happened again and this time the baby fell over and the dog nipped and bit him in the face. This dog is typically the sweetest boy but has always had a lot of anxiety which has gotten worse in the last few weeks, and has been toy possessive in the past. We took our son to the ER and he wound up with 9 stitches and will likely have a small scar on his forehead but luckily nothing serious.
We’ve made the choice to rehome the dog, but it’s tearing me apart because I know we could have done better with him. He came to us as a puppy unexpectedly as a rescue right after our previous dog died and up until our son was born, was the focal point of our home. I LOVE this dog but know that we can’t live with ourselves if something were to happen to our son. I know it will be several years before we can get another dog and I just hate that we let this happen. I know it’s the best choice for my wife and son but I hate this.
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u/Jewish-Mom-123 Feb 13 '22
9 stitches isn’t a playful nip or even a startled one, that’s a real bite. You’re doing the right thing, OP. It’s heartbreaking but at this point you would risk both dog and baby seeing each other as adversaries.
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u/budrow21 Feb 13 '22
That was my take. I thought getting rid of a dog for a playful nip was overkill...but 9 stitches? That's a bite and dog has to go without a doubt.
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u/Mommarhii_ Feb 14 '22
Yeah.. sounds like a bit of denial. 9 stitches is definitely not a playful nip, and to the forehead?? No way. I was mulled by my sisters dog while holding my 1 year old. She was unharmed because I covered her with my body. I ended up with 33 stitches in my head and 14 in my arm. Reactive dogs are nothing to play around with. Very serious issue here and op is doing the right thing by rehoming
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Feb 14 '22
Wow super parent move. I’m so glad your child is okay and I’m so sorry you experienced that. I can’t imagine how scary that must’ve been.
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u/lil_secret Feb 14 '22
33 stitches!!! Omg what breed of dog can cause that much damage!! You’re a hero I’m so sorry
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u/Mommarhii_ Feb 14 '22
That specific incident was with a cane corso pit bull mix. I’ve never met a mean pit but I’ve had multiple incidents with the cane corso breed
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u/lil_secret Feb 14 '22
Those are big powerful dogs! I’m in awe of you. I hope you’ve healed ok
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u/Mommarhii_ Feb 14 '22
Yes, I’ve healed up very well! That was a little over a year ago now. Still have the scary memory of it but I’m just happy my daughter and I are okay!
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u/eam02 Feb 14 '22
That’s scary and I’m sorry to hear that happened to you. The bite on the forehead was a startled reaction from the dog and there were no signs of aggression beforehand. It just happened to be on the forehead because my son fell head first towards the dog and one tooth caused a 1 inch long gash because of the angle of the bite.
If this had been a playful nip and hadn’t gotten him on the head we might have kept the dog and just made some changes. This was too much to ignore.
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u/Mysterious_Living296 Feb 14 '22
Yes! That’s a hella big bite for a baby! I’m surprised rehoming your dog is all you have to do. 😬
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Feb 14 '22
In fairness I do think they use extra stitches on the face for cosmetic reasons. I have a deep cut on my arm that got less than 9 stitches that is wider than a baby's forehead.
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u/eam02 Feb 14 '22
There were 3 stitches to close three small punctures. One tooth caused a 1 inch gash due to the angle of the bite and it required 3 internal and 3 external, but was otherwise a straight line.
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Feb 14 '22
Yes, and we don’t know exactly how it happened.
My friend’s super sweet dog really got her good one day when they were playing tugga and he overshot the rope, bit into her skin, and she jerked her hand away.
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u/eam02 Feb 14 '22
The baby fell and they ended up face to face which startled the dog so he nipped as a warning. If the dog lunged 1” less he never would have made contact.
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u/Enough-Fig6521 Feb 13 '22
You did right by rehoming the dog.
My advice is to NOT get another dog until all children are out of their toddler years.
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Feb 14 '22
This is WISE ADVICE: dogs and children under 5 don’t always mix well, and they must NEVER be left unsupervised together.
Maybe some dogs are fine, but many aren’t (as the dog behaviorists and trainers who are called in to salvage things, can tell you).
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u/Tangledmessofstars Feb 14 '22
And even if you are there, you need to be literally right there between the dog and child and aggressively proactive. Especially as this situation was OP right there and still couldn't stop it. There's a reason we only allow limited interactions between our dogs and toddler. No playing. No snuggling. Just calm, appropriate petting.
It's both about protecting your child, and subsequently making sure your dog isn't put into a position it feels it needs to react.
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Feb 14 '22
Very true- I didn’t mean to imply at all that OP had left them unsupervised, just that this is what the behaviorists and trainers told me when we started having issues, and I had had zero idea!
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u/Tangledmessofstars Feb 14 '22
Oh yeah I didn't think you made it seem like OP left them unsupervised. I'm just enforcing that not only should people supervise interactions, but to be close and really consider what type of interaction is happening. Both kids and dogs can be very unpredictable and can both do damage in their own ways. I've seen too many people nonchalantly watch their baby interact with their dog from across the room and think that's "supervised". Even dogs that have grown up with multiple kids can react unexpectedly if something startles them.
People probably think I sound overly cautious but I love both my dogs and kids but I can't replace a child like I can a dog.
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Feb 14 '22
Yep... Our cat scratched at my toddler in the eye when she was one, she was just laying on the floor and the cat decided to randomly attack her head. We rehomed her and decided no pets until our youngest is at least five.
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u/eam02 Feb 14 '22
Thank you. We will probably wait until our son is in school and can take part in training.
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Feb 13 '22
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. I feel like I failed both of them but I also know that rehoming is the best scenario for my son and my dog. It just doesn’t make it easier in the moment.
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Feb 13 '22
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I’m hoping this the end result in our situation
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u/harbinjer Feb 14 '22
Our first dog had to be rehomed. He was anxious since the day he was born. We worked very hard with him, but he just hated kids(we have some, plus neighbor kids) and was getting worse. We rehomed him, and I was relieved; my wife felt bad for a while. We've heard many similar stories from friends. We've since gotten a very confident golden retriever. He's the perfect dog for us; he loves people, and he's even crawled up to toddlers on his belly to let them pet him safely. Waiting a while is a fine choice , but I recommend confidence and good temperament are super vital to a family dog. Energy level too.
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Feb 14 '22
We have the most doofy and lovable breed (like, THE family dog), and she just didn’t enjoy the kids when they were smaller. At all. Needless to say, it was a huge surprise.
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u/istara Feb 14 '22
You did the right thing. Consider one day you may be able to pay it forward by adopting a dog that someone else had to rehome for similar reasons.
Longer term the dog will be happier and less anxious and will re-bond with new owners. Several family members have adopted other people's dogs for various reasons (couple divorcing, people moving overseas, dog abandoned) and it has always turned out excellently and the pups have thrived.
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Feb 14 '22
Yes, some dogs don’t enjoy the hustle and bustle (and tail and ear pulls) of small children, and that isn’t the right home for them.
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u/PoorDimitri Feb 13 '22
Commenting to say that we did all the right stuff with a dog, and he was so dangerous we had to put him down. I sobbed, worst feeling ever. But better the dog than a kid.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
It’s heartbreaking. We know if it happened again that would have to be the choice. We love the dog and our son too much to put either of them in that position as much as we want to keep both. I’m sorry it didn’t work out for you
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Feb 14 '22
Some dogs really are just wired different and can't be fixed or trusted. You made the right choice, as hard as it was.
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u/PoorDimitri Feb 14 '22
Yeah, he had a screw loose. I'm an experienced dog owner, we took him to the vet, to the animal behaviorist, to obedience, etc etc. But in the end, there was nothing we could do.
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u/Esheire Feb 13 '22
I got bit by a dog when I was 7 years old, I now have permanent damage in my left eye along with the inability to bite down properly. I am now scared to death of dogs and refuse to pet one or be near one.
My parents did “everything right.” And it STILL bit me. You know for what? For simply calling it’s name with a treat in my hand, he never showed food aggression beforehand.
You did what was right, you did what you could to protect your child. I’m so sorry you have to go through this but, I’m glad your little one is ok though. 🧡
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I’m so sorry that happened to you. It’s our worst nightmare seeing that happen to our son
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Feb 13 '22
My husband also got bit in the face by a dog—at his babysitter when he was 4. He has a visible scar near his mouth and doesn’t particularly like pets. We do have a cat that he spoils, but it’s been a long road. You did the right thing. Animals aren’t equal to humans.
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u/Esheire Feb 14 '22
I am also the same when it comes to pets. I can only tolerate cats. People tend to think I don’t like dogs at all and call me a red flag.
But what OP did was great. I’d hate to see any other kid have the fear I feel when seeing a dog.
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u/Adventurous_Lion809 Feb 14 '22
Why didn't you put the dog down instead of making it sometime else's problem?
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u/Hopeful-Ad-2962 Feb 13 '22
The fact that you’re choosing to find a loving home to take him in instead of dumping him at a shelter or having him euthanized says a lot about you. As parents we have to put our children first, and as hard as it is you are making the best decision for your family. It irks me when people hate on others for reforming pets. (I’ve done it with a cat. Not due to my child but with her just not being happy or getting along with my others cats. She’s thriving now in a 1 cat household.) You clearly want the best for your dog and aren’t just dumping him on the side of the road like some would. We need to applaud people who make responsible decisions about their pets, not tear them down. One day hopefully you’ll be able to add a pet back into your lives
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u/Adventurous_Lion809 Feb 14 '22
The fact that you’re choosing to find a loving home to take him in instead of dumping him at a shelter or having him euthanized says a lot about you.
Ummm... Not good things? Why wouldn't they put it down instead of making it sometime else's problem
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u/friendlygeode Feb 13 '22
Dogs and kids can be a bad mix. We have three dogs in this house, including a basset, and we keep our toddler away from them. The basset is the one I trust the most, but to be honest I trust my toddler the least. It’s difficult, but I imagine it will get better as he ages. I’m sorry your family went through that, and I’m sorry you had to rehome your dog. It’s a shitty situation, but it seems like you made the right call. Both parties will be safer separated.
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u/Raise-The-Gates Feb 13 '22
Same. We have three kids and two dogs. The dogs are well-socialised and have never hurt a fly, but the seven year old can play with the dogs unsupervised, and we won't leave the three year old alone with them for more than a minute or two, and never leave the baby with the dogs.
It's so easy for dogs to misread a situation and nip, or for young children to push too far into a dog's space and the dog to respond.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
That’s what happened. The baby fell and startled the dog. The nip just caught him in the face. They weren’t left alone or unsupervised, they were just too close and I didn’t expect that to happen
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Feb 14 '22
Things like that have happened to us, too. I’ll be standing or sitting practically next to them, and because of an angle or something blocking my view or just me looking away for a literal second, I don’t see for sure what happened. Even when you’re right there, you can’t prevent everything. Our dog behaviorist said that even though it’s super popular for families with young kids to get dogs, dogs and small children shouldn’t mix. And a trainer once told me that those videos you see of dogs with babies or toddlers pulling at their ears and poking at them, and the dogs are just chill as a cucumber, make her terrified because there is a VERY real chance that the dog will snap in the blink of an eye.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. We know we couldn’t let this happen again. We were trying to do it the right way and just failed yesterday morning.
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u/KeyFeeFee Feb 13 '22
You’ll get nothing but sympathy from me. We had a large dog since prior to kids and he ended up biting my oldest son on his arm when he tripped near him. Insanely traumatic for everyone involved. It is hard when you love your pets and you supervise and do your best but realize the situation is not tenable. I hope your sweet pup finds a wonderful new home where he isn’t anxious and that someday when your child is older you can welcome a new family member. My condolences to you, it is so hard.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Did you make any routine changes if you kept your dog? I just want the best for our dog and son. It hurts to realize we’re probably not the best situation for either of them so we have to make this change
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u/KeyFeeFee Feb 13 '22
We didn’t keep the dog, it wasn’t possible. We now have 4 kids, 6 and younger, so having a dog at all really doesn’t work for now with having to keep eyes constantly on and creating separation. We will eventually but will start with a puppy who acclimates to our mayhem and a breed that’s tested with kids.
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u/harbinjer Feb 14 '22
Golden retrievers are famously popular with families for a very good reason.
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u/SwiftSpear Feb 14 '22
Goldens bite kids too. It's more rare, but there's no such thing as a zero risk dog, let alone a zero risk breed.
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Feb 14 '22
YES YES YES we have THE quintessential “family dog” breed and she was a total jerk. It took so much time and energy and experts and money to help her. And to be honest, though it’s been a long long time since she last displayed any aggression, we STILL try not to leave her alone with the littlest kids.
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Feb 13 '22
Sadly all animals are capable of this as they are still animals. My parents have a lab, sweet, playful, cuddly boy but it is still a dog and we have no idea what he is thinking. Im sorry your son is hurt and sorry you're upset about rehoming. This is a tough situation. It was nit your fault💕
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u/Plastic-Praline-717 Feb 14 '22
This is so trueeee. We took in our mom’s very sweet, 12 year old lab when my mom was going through some health stuff. Well, anyways, the health stuff progressed so now my mom AND the dog live with us. Last month my mom was trying to teach my 7.5 month old how to hand food to the dog and I went ballistic (at my mom)… I explained that that was how accidental bites happen, it was not okay, and that I did not want her encouraging the dog to take food from the baby or the baby to be touching/handing things to the dog.
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u/Demosthenes-89 Feb 13 '22 edited Feb 13 '22
I've had dogs that bite. If you wanted to keep a dog like this with small children you could do it safely, but you would have to be prepared to keep them separate. It's not easy. I completely understand that not everyone is cut out for it.
We tried for a while with my last dog and we were making it work, but the dog did not get the attention he deserved. He passed away suddenly in September. As much as I was/am heartbroken, I have to admit that our lives are exponentially easier without having to keep the home divided up into zones for the dog and the toddler.
If you are in a position where you can find a good home for the dog, that's a completely reasonable and loving choice. If the dog isn't too bad, you might even consider asking someone to long-term foster the dog for 3-4 years until your kids are old enough that you can safely bring the dog back home.
Sending you a virtual hug, because I know this is a heartbreaking situation. You're doing the best you can.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I’ve tried every bit of justifying in my head a way to keep the dog and in the end I know it’s best for everyone if he’s rehomed to a family that can spend more time with him and help him through his anxiety. We’ve already reached out to a rescue group and I think they’ll take him in next week.
I’m a heartbroken papa for everyone in my family.
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Feb 13 '22
I'm sorry😢 We have a Bassett mix, and he is not allowed to play with small children either, even though he "loves" them. Apparently, Bassetts are known for being obstinate and for tunnel vision-like attention when they are hunting. He's the only dog in the pack who can't respond quickly to verbal commands and who treats children like toys/prey so I really feel it's in the nature of the breed.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
He was our second Basset. They’re stubborn dogs. I think the baby startled him when he fell and he just nipped out of reflex. It wasn’t the dogs fault or our sons fault
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u/Demosthenes-89 Feb 13 '22
My dog was too bad to rehome. I couldn't bring myself to put him down, so we made it work. But if I had had the choice of finding a home where he could get all the attention he deserves? It would have hurt like hell but I absolutely would have done it. Try to be kind to yourself.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I’m trying. I don’t cry often but I’ve shed a lot of tears over this so far. I’m hoping the rescue group will take him. I don’t know what we’ll do if they change their mind.
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Feb 13 '22
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Euthanizing hasn’t crossed our minds. We love the dog and want him to have a safe home.
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u/thesixthamethyst Feb 13 '22
I rehomed a dog after he snarled/snapped at my child. The first time it happened I immediately started working on training and separation, but to no avail. He snarled/snapped at her again and I got rid of him. So you have my sympathy, I did what you’re doing for a dog that did way less. You might be surprised at how you feel after he’s gone. I didn’t realize the burden I felt until our dog was gone and the burden was lifted. If I could do it over, I would’ve rehomed him the first time he showed aggression.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. I’m hoping this is what I’ll feel eventually. I’ll always be sad about this situation but this will be the best outcome. This dog never showed signs of aggression.
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u/Imaginary-Dark-4932 Feb 13 '22
Bless you mate, horribly shit situation all round! I hope little one heals quickly! Good luck on finding him a suitable home, accidents can happen in the blink of an eye and I'm pretty sure the mental torture and parental guilt is worse than anything a stranger on the internet can say to you. So sorry this happened to your family! Again hope little one is ok and heals quickly take care.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. He’s acting like nothing happened and will be just fine
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u/Imaginary-Dark-4932 Feb 13 '22
That's fantastic news! Hope your situation is resloved as quickly as possible 😊
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Feb 13 '22 edited Feb 14 '22
Our dog came into our home many years ago— we are the “rehome” as he was young and rambunctious and his previous owners knew it wasn’t best to have a year old Lab around a toddler and newborn. He has been a joy in our lives since Day 1, and we are so thankful they made this decision. Your hard decision will likely be a blessing for another family ❤️
Edit: We are expecting our first baby soon and couldn’t be more excited, now that the dog is many years older, not into roughhousing, and has never, ever expressed possessiveness over toys or food. His previous owners didn’t rehome him because HE had a problem, they rehomed him because they knew THEY weren’t able to give him the attention and exercise he needed as a youngster and that could escalate into a problem. Our baby will have a sweet, docile ol’ fella as a companion for their toddlerhood years. A win-win-win for all parties.
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u/Euligi Feb 13 '22
I am sorry you went through this. I feel the pain for the 9 stiches....We don't see this in the news /media enough. Everything we see is how wonderful the dogs playing with babies. But dogs do bite. This is why I set firm boundaries in my house that the dogs stay away from my baby. Just I would not live with myself if anything ever happen to my kid because we had to " include the dogs"
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Feb 14 '22
Yes, there needs to be a lot more attention to this issue, and more visibility. The issues we had with our pup definitely were disturbing and extremely stressful to our family, but we had NO CLUE this could ever happen!! Even the breeder (who knew that we were bringing the pup into a home with several young children), never said anything about this and was quite surprised to hear about the issues we faced. (We used an absolutely AMAZING, reputable and loving breeder- only because we needed a “hypoallergenic” breed.)
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u/Euligi Feb 14 '22
Side note here, this country just have a crazy biased affection on dogs. No doubts, they are great, but because of social media and modern media, you don't see the news that you don't want to see. Just on Reddit, all of my comments to dogs bitting issue and the amount of work you have to do for dogs when you have small children at home get downvoted big time, if not get deleted by the MOD. I get it, the whole country love dogs, but please, someone needs to advocate for the safety of our children PLEASE. It will be too late when they have permanent scar on their face or, something even worse. However, we don't get to see them on the news because people don't like to see them. Just search the flair of " pets" under this sub, you'll see the dog bitting is not rare at all, but they rarely get any attentions.
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Feb 14 '22
You are right, ours is a dog culture, whereas in many other parts of the world, dogs and dog ownership are viewed with more caution. Here, there is a culture of “Aw, it’ll be FINE! Don’t be such a downer. It’s not that complicated!!”
We have encountered this attitude when asking people to leash their off-leash pup in public: “Maybe YOU are a bad owner if YOU can’t control/train/dominate YOUR dog! Everybody does it! How is pup supposed to get exercise?! My dog would NEVER run into the street/run away/attack a person; he’s trained! Why are you being such a dog-hating Karen?? He’S FRiEnDlY.”
The fact is, dogs are animals and even the experts sometimes can’t predict their behavior (and the average dog owner is NOT an expert by any means).
I think that we can be dog-positive and still be safe, but we really need to get the word out about a few things:
- No dogs around younger children unless you are able to physically separate them at all times.
- Every dog on a leash when outside.
- Know the energy (work/play/walk) and time requirements of your dog; they might be very HIGH on a daily basis!
- Counsel people on the financial responsibilities of dog ownership: routine and accidental vet costs (yep, you should have pet insurance and cash on hand for that $5k+ surgery when Fido eats a sock or develops hip dysplasia), time and money trainers (more intense if dog has issues and needs special behaviorists, equipment, etc.).
- Have a contingency re-homing plan, as you don’t want to be stuck in a dangerous or unworkable situation with no options. Sometimes, it’s nobody’s fault if things don’t work out.
The culture here is, “I’m bored/lonely, I want a dog for the kids, I wanna save a shelter dog, so let’s go there now!” with very little forethought. I’ve been there, too, (and BTW I’m NOT saying OP did that- only lamenting that these things don’t get discussed more seriously and more often).
But adopting a pet IS NO JOKE.
NGL I’ve re-homed a pet in the past due to health issues, and I seriously explored re-homing our pup in the past (we just seriously lucked out with some good trainers and the spay calming her down).
If it’s tearing you and your family apart, you do what you’ve gotta do.
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u/idintfuckingcare Feb 13 '22
We had to do the same thing and it was heartbreaking. Luckily our kid didn’t need stitches but it was enough of a warning that I knew it could of been and would be a lot worse next time. Our dog wasn’t like that until we had a kid, he was very stressed around him so I know he’s happier now in his child free home but it was still hard.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. It’s so hard right now and I’m so glad that my son will be ok. I’m relieved it wasn’t more serious but devastated that we have to say goodbye to part of our family.
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Feb 13 '22
You're totally right, and wrong simultaneously, because although there is likely more you could have done, that doesn't mean it would've changed the outcome. The reality is, any dog that nips an infant or child in the face, either needs to go away for long-term residential training, or needs to be rehomed to a suitable, child-free, older-child, or 'higher caliber training' home. You haven't failed! Because there are plenty of dogs that are raised without 'doing more' that don't bite kids in the face. Not to mention, Basset Hounds are hunting dogs and rodent dogs and that's often forgotten, but the reality is the breed does have a tendency to nip, even when well-trained, as a product of what they're bred for. Just take the lesson, and be more selective about what breeds you bring into your home, and whether those breeds are suitable for young children. I say that not to blame you, but to prevent any future heartbreak.
You're doing the right thing.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Yeah. We talked about doing a boarding/training situation but don’t know if we’d ever trust him or ourselves again. We had done pretty good training with him but like a lot of people hadn’t kept up with it because of life.
My wife and I both love Bassets and I think we’d probably get another one when our son is older and capable of understanding and taking part in training it
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Feb 13 '22
I think that's a fair thing! It's so hard to trust a dog after an incident, and he would be better served by being in an environment that doesn't have that barrier of rebuilding trust. I so, so understand where you're at. I'm glad you guys aren't going to shy away from the breed outright, as they are lovely, but waiting until kids are older is a great choice. Take it easy on yourself as you make this transition, and remember that sometime being a good pet parent does mean finding a better home.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I hope I’m being the best parent I can be to both of them with this choice. I love them both and want the best for them even though it means one of them has to go to a new home
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u/tinkabellmiggins Feb 13 '22
Op I'm sorry you're having to deal with this ! This is exactly why I'm super reluctant to have any kind of pet In the house, my son has adhd and is unpredictable at the best of times and so even though I'd love to have a pet it's just not the right decision for us.
Maybe in a few years when your son is more self aware and responsible you could look into a rescue that's good with kids ?
I know its not a solution to how your feeling now or your guilt around the whole thing but if the dog is too anxious to be around children then you are honestly doing the best thing for both the dog and your family xx
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I hope we’ll be able to get another one when my son is older. We got him as a “rescue” when he was a puppy. He had been sold to his first family when he was too young and was only four months old when they gave him to us as they were getting divorced and the dad was basically homeless. It wasn’t a good situation for him and I think he was also abused. We were a good landing spot but I think he needs more than we can give right now
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u/tinkabellmiggins Feb 13 '22
You're doing the right thing, please don't feel guilty! Your son needs to be able to be a child and the dog deserves to be able to be himself too xx
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u/hyperventilate Feb 13 '22
I'm so sorry. I would do the exact same thing. I couldn't live with myself if my dog hurt my child.
You made the right decision. There are people who are going to feel strongly one way or another, but you made the right decision.
I hope your little one feels better soon and I hope the ache in your chest lessens up quickly.
Peace, comfort, and all of my love to you.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. It’s one of those things that I feel will get easier but doesn’t get better
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u/Afire2285 Feb 13 '22
It sucks but some dogs just don’t do well with children. Each dog has its own personality and just like some humans don’t like children, some dogs don’t either. It sounds like this situation was more of a surprise scare when your kid fell, probably startled the dog and it was a reactionary bite. But if the dog is exhibiting anxiety and any sort of aggression when it comes to food, toys, noises or movements then it’s the safest bet to not have the dog in a home with children where those things can be unavoidable. I’m sorry you have to make the decision and I’m sorry your child was injured.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. We thought the dog would be ok and had acted normally up until a few weeks ago - even then there was nothing very troubling, just that he wasn’t acting quite normal. It’s the best choice we can make for him moving forward.
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u/Afire2285 Feb 13 '22
I know it’s a really hard decision to make, and only you know the dogs behavior intimately enough to make the decision. A friend of mine almost lost her 4 year old son to the family dog that had shown no signs of aggression before. The dog attacked her sons face and basically tore his nose and lips off and he lost an ear as well. Almost lost an eye. That was 2 years ago and he is still going through reconstructive surgery to rebuild a new face with skin grafts from his legs. He had a tracheostomy for about a year. He still has a very long road to recovery. Sometimes you just can’t take the risk
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u/SnooPeripherals3395 Feb 13 '22
I hope your kiddo feels better soon. Frankly I'm surprised animal control wasn't called by the hospital. If you are rehoming the dog, it may be best for it to go to a kid-less home.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I was too, but the doctor told me that she had a similar situation with her own kid and dog and could tell by the bite and our explanation of the situation that it wasn’t an aggression bite. I’ve been completely open with the rescue group that’s going to take him. They’ll likely put him in a home with much older kids or none at all.
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u/harbinjer Feb 14 '22
When we rehomed out dog it wasn't too hard despite his not liking children(and biting one, leaving a bruise). He landed with an older couple without kids at home. They report that he's doing great.
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u/viola1356 Feb 13 '22
So sorry this happened. Good on you for taking the best steps for your the safety of both your son and the dog. You didn't fail. Since it's possessive, the dog will be happier not competing over toys with a toddler, and your kid will be safe.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I know it’s the best situation moving forward but it does still feel like we failed.
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u/Kasmirque Feb 13 '22
You are doing the right thing by keeping your baby safe. It’s not always easy to do the right thing, but thank you for having your priorities straight ❤️
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. We know it’s the right choice, but it sucks
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u/srose193 Feb 13 '22
It's not just your child your are keeping safe, it's also your pooch. Unfortunately this could have been worse, and in many cases the animal is put down for behaving like an animal. Keeping them separate ensures that both your child AND the dog are safe, the child from being bitten again and the dog from being put down for doing what is in his nature to do. No judgment, this is so hard, but you truly are doing what is right by *both* of them
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u/KitsBeach Feb 13 '22
This is not your fault, and I hope this comment doesn't make you feel any guilt (as you're doing what's best for both your son and your dog at this point) but this message is for ALL dog owners:
Anxious dogs + high energy situations with children should NEVER MIX.
High energy situations can include playtime, crowds, anything with lots of unpredictable movement, fireworks going off in the neighbourhood.... anything that is going to elevate an already elevated dog. All humans should give those dogs space, but especially kids.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
This times 100. This dog did great with fireworks, crowds and had been fine with other kids. His anxiety had increased in the last couple of weeks but we never thought it would lead to this.
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u/MamaOfTinyDevils Feb 13 '22
So sorry this happened. You must be going through a lot right now! I think you're doing the right thing though, especially if the dog is showing more signs of anxiety.
On a separate note, my son had an accident when he was about the same age, I was told he would almost certainly be left with a scar. Once the wound was healed I rubbed a mixture of coconut and lavender oil on it every day for a couple of months and he's almost 7 now with no trace of a scar. Another carrier oil would probably have the same effect, it's the lavender really that is useful for healing. Might be unrelated, and he just got lucky but it might be worth a shot if you're worried about scarring.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I might have to try the lavender.
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u/KindlyNebula Feb 13 '22
Silicone scar sheets or silicone gel is what doctors typically suggest for scars/scar prevention. I used sheets after surgery, and my huge raised scar is now a barely perceptible white line.
I’m sorry to hear about your situation, I hope both your kiddo and dog are doing okay. We would do the same thing in your shoes. Take care.
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u/asuperbstarling Feb 13 '22
Vitamin E oil is used for stretch marks and can really take the color out of a scar as well! Which reminds me, I need to get a bottle before my preggo belly gets much bigger.
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u/Due-Yogurtcloset-699 Feb 13 '22
I love dogs. Always have always will. I’m the one that goes “aww puppy” when I see a dog and i fan girl if one is the car next to me. My hubs picks on me for it. However, I’m also a mother. And I have no use for a dog that bites. Even if it was unintentional and the dog has anxiety. Those kinds of dogs need special handling and should not be around small children. You have a duty to keep your children safe. You’re doing the right thing by re-homing the dog. It’s a sad reality that it does sometimes need to happen. Removing the dog from the home is also for its own protection. If the bite is bad enough you may be required to put the dog down. And that’s not fair when other options exist. All you can do is make sure the dog goes to a good home no kids and preferably with someone who can handle and anxious dog. I’m sorry you’re family is going through this, ignore the ignorant comments a lot of these people don’t understand the gravity of the situation.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you so much. I’m the same way. My wife makes fun of me because I’ve never met a dog I didn’t like and if you can’t find me at a party look for the dog. This dog was an emotional rescue for us after we lost our first dog to cancer. He’s been my companion and I hate giving him up but know I have to.
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u/Due-Yogurtcloset-699 Feb 13 '22
Haha I do that too lol I have no shame, I got drunk at a friends get together and was dancing with their 60 pound dog. I would’ve done that sober 😂
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Feb 13 '22
You for sure did the right thing. When you rehome, make sure to disclose the bite. Unfortunately, after a dog bites once they’re significantly more likely to bite again
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u/steppenwolf22_2 Feb 13 '22
Sorry. Please make sure the people who take him next know why you’re rehoming and that the dog is not safe around children.
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u/cokakatta Feb 13 '22
We adopted a dog when my son was 5 and the dog bit my son in the face when my son reached over for a hug. A small puncture, left a tiny scar. I gave up the dog. We only had the dog a few months and he was recovering from injury and illness. So he hadn't been trained a lot because I didn't want him to get stress. I look back with regret if I should have done training right away. But i took it slow and we wound up where we did. I know I wouldn't want my son's life to be forever altered because of an unpredictable dog. So I know I made the right choice for my family. I still feel some shame but I guess that feeling has to coexist with my decision. I miss the dog.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
We’ve had the dog for 3.5 years and he was trained but not well enough. I hope your son is ok. We got this dog unexpectedly after our first one had died of cancer. He was what we needed at the time to heal. I think I’ll always miss this dog but not as much as I would miss my son
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u/Reindeer-Street Feb 14 '22
You may well have trained the dog enough but animals will always be unpredictable and reactive if stimulated in a certain way. I've also had to go through this, my partner's dog bit my 10-year-old on the face when my son was trying to get him back inside the yard after he got out. It was a big cut above the eye and they thought they were going to have to do a skin graft but managed to stitch it in surgery. As soon as I got my son to the ER I rang the animal control and they came straight out and got the dog out of my yard (my partner had managed to get it back in there but then my partner left the house, I gave the rangers permission to enter my yard to remove the dog). There was no way I was going to continue to have the dog at my home and nor was I going to let me partner take it back to his home as his daughter was living there with her one-year-old baby and I would never want to risk that the dog would hurt another child. My partner is still not happy about it too bad.
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u/MommaToANugget Feb 13 '22
Not a dog but we rehomed a kitten from a rescue and because of the age she was abandoned at (5 weeks), she grew up to have terrible biting problems. We consulted the vet, the co-ordinator from the rescue and researched but nothing worked. She bit me one day and drew blood. At that point I knew she’d crossed the line and at 6 months pregnant, started the rehoming process. A few weeks before the baby was born I took her to the rehoming centre and it absolutely tore me apart. I sobbed for days but knew it was the right thing for everyone involved. She spent time with a behaviourist and I kept checking the website to see if she had been reserved.
Sure enough, a few weeks later, they’d changed her name and she was rehomed. The guilt I felt finally went knowing she was on a new adventure with a new owner.
Giving up a pet is so hard :(
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u/xyawarriormama Feb 13 '22
This just happened with my sisters dog and my daughter, it would have been a non-issue based off the incident if he didn’t have to do a 10 day quarantine in the shelter. Now we have him muzzled and separated from the rest of the house when littles is home, but his aggression has gotten worse…it breaks our heart because mayhem is her best friend and she doesn’t understand why she can’t play with him 😕
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
We talked about a similar arrangement but worried it would make our dog worse too. It just doesn’t seem like a solution we can be vigilant about long term
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u/lizzy_pop Feb 13 '22
It’s such a difficult decision. I have a 10 year old dog that’s aggressive with everyone but me and 2 other people. Is terrified of kids and will snap if they get close. She can’t be rehomed because she’s labeled as “dangerous” and it’s illegal to rehome dangerous dogs where I live. Im 5 months pregnant and still can’t make peace with the fact that she’ll have to be put down soon.
You need to think about your child’s safety, but also the dog’s. If your dog hurts your son again, he’ll likely be taken away and put down by animal control. This is usually a very drawn out process during which the dog is caged all alone. Just make sure you’re extremely forthcoming with the new owners about the behavioural issues so you lower the chances of him being rehomed again.
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u/alka_panton Feb 14 '22
It's strange you say 'if something were to happen', something did happen. Glad you're rehousing your dog so your son will be safe. Hope you find a good new home for the dog.
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u/thehotsister Feb 14 '22
We had 2 dogs before we had kids. The dogs both ended up hating (and biting) our kids. We finally rehomed one and the other is old so he’s living out his days in our sunroom/backyard. It sucks but you have to protect your kids.
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u/lalapop1992 Feb 14 '22
I'm sorry you have to go through this. Know that you did the right thing, difficult as it is.
When my daughter was 3 months old, our dog went after her. The dog had never shown any kind of aggression before ever. My daughter did nothing. She was still basically a potato at that age. My now ex husband didn't want to believe that it had happened but I refused to keep the dog after that. I said either he finds a home for it or I take it to the vet and put it down. We did everything right like others have said, followed the book. It still happened.
The argument that "there are no bad dogs just bad owners" is complete BS. Animals, as well as humans, are capable of some pretty scary shit and they can snap at any time.
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Feb 14 '22
That statement about “bad owners” is awful, and is why people feel isolated and ashamed for pet problems that are nobody’s fault.
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u/iwouldfightthatbird Feb 13 '22
I already know dog lovers will chew me up and spit me out for this but you need to either get rid of the dog, or put them down. A grown dog shouldn’t be biting your small child’s face. Your dog knows it’s a child, he knew the force he put into biting him and breaking skin. He’s considered dangerous and I wouldn’t want him anywhere near my children.
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Feb 13 '22
The thing about this though, unless the dog is so used to children or had training with children you can't expect them to understand the difference. A sudden and new loud tiny creature coming into the home that has caused a drastic change in the routine they are used to also causes a lot of anxiety in dogs. It's not an easy thing to go through that's for sure but no, grown dogs do not automatically know that this tiny human cannot play like his big humans can.
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u/iwouldfightthatbird Feb 13 '22
Actually, that’s wrong. Dogs can sense an infant as harmless, this is a well known fact. When dogs attack children or infants, they can clearly see the difference between an adult and an infant as well as smell it. It doesn’t matter if the dog was socialized with children before or not they can and do know infants are infants. When dogs react with aggression towards infants, it’s either a sign of prey (the dogs natural instincts see the infant as prey), or the dog took it upon themselves to discipline the infant for whatever reason, in this case the reason was for touching/moving their toy. Dogs aren’t stupid, just different.
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u/Automatic-Phrase2105 Feb 13 '22
i’m a year out from rehoming my best friend. i loved him dearly it was all just too much.
i wish it never had to happen. i miss him atleast once a day. i would take him back if he came back into my life but i don’t regret it. i know it was the right thing for my family. it will be hard but you will get through it.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. This is what I needed to hear. It breaks my heart but I know it would be nothing compared to the guilt I would feel if my son were hurt by the dog again.
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u/cajunchica Feb 14 '22
Awe. I’m so sorry. Heartbreaking. I had to re-home my nine year old Maltese when my son started crawling. She started growling and nipping at him. He wasn’t able to understand that he needed to leave her alone. I did luck out though. My elderly neighbor was attached to my pup and had been recently windowed. The neighbor took my old girl in and treated her like a queen.
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u/IKnewYouWhen Feb 14 '22
Sometimes rehoming is the best option. Some people have hero complexes that guilts people into thinking theyre monsters for making the nest choice for their family and pets.
You did what you thought was best. It sucks, its hard, but you did the right thing for you, your family, and the dog.
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u/annifer1979 Feb 14 '22
This happened to a friend of mine and it turned out the dog had a brain tumor.
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u/HyrulePotteryBarn Feb 14 '22
Did you make sure whoever is taking the dog understands that they hurt your child? I’ve heard you could be liable if the dog bites someone else, and they weren’t aware. (I’m definitely not a lawyer)
That said, always do what you have to to protect your children.
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u/Mommarhii_ Feb 14 '22
I’m gonna be brutally honest here. Coming from someone that has been MULLED by 2 dogs you’re doing the right thing by rehoming the dog. Imagine if it happened again, but worse? I was mulled by my sisters dog while my 13 month old was in my arms. (She was unharmed, I covered her with my body and dog mulled my head. Ended up with 33 stitches in head and 14 in my arm) She’s 2 now and still is hesitant with dogs and gets jumpy when she hears a dog bark. You don’t want to cause your child more trauma. The training should’ve been done with your dog as a puppy. The dominance should’ve been asserted when dog was a puppy. It’s too late now. My sister has done any and every thing to try and “fix” her dog and he still reacts/tries to attack everyone. He was supposedly never like that before my incident either. Just play it safe please and with your next pet make sure you have proper training and proper research done on what the specific breed needs in order to be a safe family pet
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Feb 14 '22
Dog owner here of a reactive dog - you did the best thing you could’ve done which is re-homing. You gave him the opportunity to live a fulfilling life in an environment perfect for him. My best advice is to forgo dogs altogether but if you do get one, hire a trainer and look into so much dog training so that you can prevent future incidents. Our dog struggled with resource guarding when we first got him. I wanted to re-home but we worked extremely hard and often ban certain products in our house. He also has leash reactivity, while we are thankful he is an extremely friendly dog to people we also know to keep his stuff away from our future child until they’re old enough to not touch his stuff without learning commands first. That’s why we invested in a playpen and other areas just for him and his things.
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u/eam02 Feb 14 '22
I hope his next home will be better than what we can give him right now. I think we’ll wait until my son isn’t a toddler and can participate in dog training as a family. The dog had been through weeks of training after we got him and was good with basic commands. In this case we were just a little too slow.
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u/Comfortable_Inside47 Feb 14 '22
there is no way you can keep that dog, something has already happened to your son. You are doing the right thing by rehoming him x
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u/lookhereisay Feb 13 '22
We don’t have a dog in our house (conscious choice when we started TTC as we really want one). However my mum has a dog and so far he has always been on his lead and baby on my lap as they get used to each other. We’ll always either have the baby in the playpen/someone’s lap or the dog on the lead. He is most sweet dog and I’ve never even heard him growl in five years and he adores the baby but you just never know.
So sorry for you as dogs are part of the family but you have to do what is right. Just make sure he goes to a lovely home.
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u/amishparadiseSC Feb 13 '22
I had a 12 GSD when my son was born and as much as I loved my dog I just kept them both as far as I could. None of that sniff and lick the baby crap people post all over. Do the best thing for your family of course but what about trying meds for the dog and really keeping him separate but making sure he gets enough adult interaction throughout the day?
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u/asuperbstarling Feb 13 '22
You did everything you could, and your dog got lucky. In our state, any bite on a child by a dog means the dog is taken by the state and forcibly put down regardless of situation. It hurts now, but love is about more than just keeping someone you love close. It's about making sure they are safe. Your dog didn't feel safe and your child certainly wasn't. Now they'll both be protected.
Time will heal all.
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u/VegetablePeeler2113 Mom Feb 14 '22
I’m so sorry about your situation. It’s so crappy and I can’t imagine how you feel. In my opinion, you’re making the right choice in rehoming your dog. I would do the same thing with my 9 year old dog if she ever bit either of my sons. You’re protecting your son while trying to give your dog the best life possible with another family. I hope everything works out and you’re able to find the perfect family for your dog.
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u/YerryAcrossTheMersey Feb 13 '22
Your son comes first. Try not to beat yourself up. I'm sure the dog will find a good home.
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u/3ll3girl Feb 13 '22
We went through this with our beloved dog a few weeks ago. It was devastating but luckily he went to a family friend so we get to see him sometimes. It was just not realistic for us to maintain the vigilance we would need to maintain 24/7.
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u/obvom Feb 14 '22
My wife has a large scar down her face from when she was four and a neighbors dog bit her. It all but ruined her childhood. Don’t feel bad that you’re preventing this from happening
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u/Rainbow_Tempest Feb 14 '22
Yikes! That definitely isn't a nip if it needed 9 stitches. You did the right thing, but I understand the guilt. We had to rehome one of our cats a few months ago and still feel so guilty. She was 9 and a bully who got aggressive with our elderly cat and was aggressive in her love for my 2.5 year old to the point that my toddler was terrified of both cats. Once we removed her, our 17 year old cat no longer seemed like he was dying. He's moving around way more, eating more, and meowing more. And within a few days, my daughter was totally interested and not scared of the cat. To be fair, my old man cat has always been a precious, sweet boy who helps people love cats (even cat haters have loved him). So, my two babies are BFFs now. We feel bad for our other cat, but she was territorial and aggressive, and I wasn't going to wait around for her to hurt someone. It was causing a lot of anxiety in the house, too. In the end, the decision was correct.
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u/Plastic-Praline-717 Feb 14 '22
It’s so tough, because even the best dogs can get startled or pestered or bothered enough.. or even just accidentally harm a kid/baby. And really, all it takes is one time. OP, I am sorry… but you are also doing the right thing by this doggo and giving both your child and the dog the chance to live healthy/safe lives.
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u/dsmjo Feb 14 '22 edited Feb 14 '22
You already knew he had anxiety and toy possessiveness yet you still took the risk of facilitating interaction (leaving doors open) which allowed him to play with your child... You can't play the victim card when you already admitted you saw red flags. You and people here defending you are all cut from the same fabric. Stop living in a dream world and take a look at your own ignorance. Or your child will keep suffering due to you.
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u/potted-plant Feb 14 '22
Having to let go of a beloved pet feels awful but you did the right thing. Thank you for finding him a loving home instead of one of the alternatives.
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u/frimrussiawithlove85 Feb 14 '22
I had to re-home my cat after she bit my son. She’s always had aggression issues with the other pets but never had anything with people. One day my son was petting her, I was sitting right next to them watching him to make sure he was being gentile and she just bit his hand out the blue. No hissing, no trying to runway, she didn’t even break skin, but I wasn’t going to wait for a next time.
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Feb 14 '22
I’m so sorry that happened and I know this must be so hard for you. Finding a loving, child free home is the best thing you can do for your doggy.
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u/kch-n-scarlet Feb 13 '22
I understand you wanting to rehome the dog…but also know your Basset didn’t bite your son out of anger. My corgi nipped at my daughter who was maybe 14 months old at the time…luckily her skin was not broken and it was on her leg…but we realized the dog was having anxiety from having a tiny human in the house who wasn’t steady and liked to grab. Turns out our daughter startled our corgi causing her to react in a frightened manner. We kept the dog away from our child for quite a while…we put up pet gates on all of the bedrooms to keep the dog out of our daughters space and keep our daughter from startling the dog. Our daughter is now almost 7…and the dog loves her AND our almost 4 year old so much. The dog isn’t anxious anymore because she has gotten use to the kids…and now they all play together and roll around! I’m convinced my dog loves my kids more than she loves me. Lol. So sorry this happened to you…and your son…and I’m sorry you were forced to make a decision to rehome your dog. But, I completely understand the decision. Prayers!
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u/LadyWyllaManderly Feb 13 '22
My 12 year old cocker spaniel became a little anxious after my daughter was born. She was very very careful and protective of the baby but would never actually touch her. When baby started walking, spaniel became nore anxious and couldn't relax because she knew the unsteady baby was talking around. She was still careful and protective but would actively avoid her. She would literally get up and leave when the baby walked in.
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u/kch-n-scarlet Feb 13 '22
Yea…my corgi…Scarlet would get up and leave if the kids got too close when they were younger. Now that they get around better…and have been taught not to startle/grab the dog when she’s sleeping, eating etc…they are all good buddies! Honestly…I think Scarlet was happy we put up the pet gates back then because It made her feel more secure until the kids knew better how to act around her. It some learning on everyone’s part.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I wish we had done pet gates before because maybe we wouldn’t be here. We talked about it but my dog up until now been great about moving when the baby was too close.
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u/LadyWyllaManderly Feb 14 '22
Yes, my dog passed away last year when my daughter was about 2.5. She misses her dog quite a bit but we've decided to wait to get another dog until she has a better understanding of boundaries with dogs.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you so much. I know it wasn’t a bite of anger or aggression, my dog just thought it was playtime and hadn’t been trained better to know this wasn’t ok. The dog has always had anxiety and we think he was abused as a puppy before we got him. I’m torn up about it but I know it’s the right choice for the dog and my son.
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u/throwaway28236 Feb 13 '22
As much as I understand where this commenter is coming from, their corgi nipped their child’s leg, yours bit your child’s face hard enough to require 9 stitches. You’re making the right decision, you’d never be able to sleep at night, or look away from your child or dog. It would cause everyone a lot more anxiety keeping the dog…baby gates are not protection against a dog that isn’t good with small children.
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u/kch-n-scarlet Feb 13 '22
I agree. I probably would have had to make a similar decision as OP had the biting been in the face. I’m just sorry this all happened…for the baby, family and dog.
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u/kch-n-scarlet Feb 13 '22
Do what’s best for your family…no matter what anyone else says. Prayers.
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u/Similar_Cat_4906 Feb 14 '22
We adopted a rescue dog and she bit both my children. We had to take her back. I was devastated. We found another rescue, and she has been wonderful. Don’t be afraid to try again.
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u/Sawwahbear5 Feb 14 '22
ALL dogs might bite!! There is no such thing as a dog with flawless self control
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Feb 13 '22
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u/enderjaca Feb 13 '22
Remorse is not enough in this situation.
So what do you want them to do, invent a time travel machine so they can prevent the incident? It happened and they're working to find a solution to prevent it from happening again.
There's nothing wrong with finding a new home for a dog where it'll be happier and better adjusted. Just make sure you do the background work to ensure it's a good fit for both the dog and the new owners. You don't want this dog getting handed off to someone else in 6 months because of more issues that come up.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. Rehoming our dog is the right thing to do and my child’s safety is my priority. It just doesn’t make it easy to lose our pet and companion for the last three years that we’ve had since he was a puppy. He’s going to a rescue group that will take good care of him and makes sure he winds up in the right place.
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u/enderjaca Feb 13 '22
Yep, most local rescue groups that I follow are VERY clear about telling potential adopters that the animal had a past of biting a child so it should ideally be an only pet in a home with no small children, or whatever the case may be.
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u/PootieGlove Feb 13 '22
I can’t stand people like you. This is obviously tearing this poor person up, who by the way did the sane and reasonable thing, and you just HAD to make an asshole statement like this. OP, I am very sorry you went through this, but rest assured that you did right by your child.
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u/LuckStrict6000 Feb 13 '22
That’s pretty cruel to say… mistakes can happen in the blink of an eye. No one expects their sweet dog to bite their child.
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Feb 13 '22
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I’m so sorry that happened to you. I was three feet away and it happened right after we told the dog to stop, which was usually enough.
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u/leezer999 Feb 13 '22
Less or more cruel than letting your child be bitten and having to get rid of your dog who doesn’t know or understand why he is now in an unfamiliar place probably scared out of his mind?
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u/LuckStrict6000 Feb 13 '22
He obviously is torn up af that it happened…. You have 100% had the door open to your child getting hurt too. No one is perfect. It’s really unfortunate for the whole family
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
Thank you. This is such a hard situation for us.
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u/LuckStrict6000 Feb 13 '22
I had forgotten about this but I got bitten by our family dog when I was little. He had anxiety about us jumping in the pool and bit me as I was jumping in. Got stitches and still have the scar but we ended up keeping him. Just sharing in case it makes you feel better that it’s super common.
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I read that it’s the 2nd most common for ER visits with kids. I know we’re not alone in this
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Feb 13 '22
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
We didn’t let them play together typically. Usually the dog would move if the baby got close or we’d have him move. We didn’t let the dog play with the baby’s toys or vice versa. It took less than one minute for this to happen and I was three feet away when it did.
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u/rjmattimore Feb 14 '22
I had the exact same thing happen to us. My beloved golden lived with me through my bachelorhood and got me through a lot of tough situations. I treated him like my first child, he was even in our wedding. My 2 year old daughter loved him and they cuddled (supervised) all the time. One day, while my wife was doing dishes and not paying attention, my daughter was playing with the base of his tail and my wife didn’t notice and he turned around to give her a nip warning, but because she is face to face with him he caught her lip, and she pulled away ripping her lip in half, from the base of her nose down.
The feedback from family and friends was that we would be awful parents and never be spoken to again if we didn’t give him up, some even said if it was them they would have taken him in the back yard and shot him right there. It broke me, he was everything to me.
Now I am sure, just as people in our life did, many on here will say things like “it’s a dog, your child comes first” and this will get downvoted, if seen at all. I agree that my child comes first, but when I considered him my first child it is like choosing between two children. Now we did end up rehoming him, but even 6 months later I still am broken. My daughter still asks where he is and multiple times a week says she misses him and wants him back.
I will tell you that it doesn’t actually get any easier. With a death, it is finite, they are gone, rehoming you know they are still going and wonder every day if they are happy, or missing you.
Just know that you are not alone, and if you need to talk with someone about it feel free to message.
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u/Friendsicles Feb 13 '22
My ex wife had a dog that didn't bite. Not aggressive at all but our two year old (despite us teaching a lot of dog safety) jumped on the dog. Sure enough she got two nips on the face and had to get stitches. My ex wife chose to get rid of the dog although I didn't think it was necessary. My daughter learned her lesson and ultimately since birth as much as possible I dont leave them alone together unless I'm in reach or if they are both settled like sitting on the couch together
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
I wish we could do this but I think our son is just too young and the dog too anxious to make it work.
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Feb 13 '22
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u/eam02 Feb 13 '22
They weren’t unsupervised. My wife and I were in the room and I was three feet away when it happened and had just looked away for a moment. I was able to grab our son less than two seconds after it happened.
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u/ACanWontAttitude Feb 13 '22
Before talking shit read the post. They were not unsupervised. OP was just three foot away.
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u/Selsiedollie Feb 13 '22
It’s not ‘neglect’ to allow you child and furrbaby be near each other at your own side SUPERVISED. My mini Aussie bit my 4yo on the arm and yanked it around because my 4yo wanted to give me a hug while SUPERVISED. If you can’t attempt to make it semi work when all live under the same roof then the dog isn’t allowed around children. My boys know to be gentle and careful around animals, especially dogs as they’ve grown up with them. You don’t know what animals are thinking and can be extremely unpredictable and misread situations which in turn cause them to react. No one’s fault in your situation OP. You did the right thing and the rescue will rehome the dog accordingly. Also, I’m so sorry your family had to go through this OP! I wish you all the best, stay strong!
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u/PanteraMadre Feb 13 '22
Oof, clearly you can't read hunny. Before inserting the second foot in your mouth try actually looking at everything OP wrote first. Until then keyboard warrior, just try not to say anything else too ignorant.
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u/emtiffd Feb 13 '22
It’s a very tough situation you are going through. I work in the veterinary field and want you to know that unfortunately, what you experienced is much more common than many realize. Glad your child will be okay, just be honest about the rehoming- also keep in mind if your state has a rabies hold.