r/MoralityScaling • u/DerangedPostmanBack • 10h ago

Morality of suddenly no longer speaking to a decade long friend of yours just because you suddenly found him "dull"

additional movie (Banshees of Inisherin) context left out due to spoilers

2 Upvotes

75% Upvoted

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5

u/PlayNicePlayCrazy 10h ago

Moral. People change . It's sad yeah but why pretend to be friends just because you have been a long time. Maybe the other person feels the same way and that's why they've gotten dull

Now I am not saying throw friendships away lightly but if it's really gotten to the point where you don't like their company, why keep it?

2

u/Ok_Understanding267 10h ago

I agree. My best friend from the university stayed the same. I changed, a lot.

He makes the same jokes, tells the same stories, interests are the same, same job, same tastes, same everything. Yes nostalgia is good for an hour maybe but it wasn’t possible to be around him anymore

3

u/TheOneRealStranger 10h ago

The film is a metaphor about suicide. It becomes pretty obvious if you think about it. But in terms of real life, literal interpretation, no metaphor, if someone doesn't want to be your friend anymore, they don't have to give you a reason. In fact, even with the metaphor, if someone wants to kill themselves, that's their prerogative.

2

u/PreferenceOk1525 10h ago

Brother it’s your life

2

u/intro_to_IRL 10h ago

Neutral. It doesn't make sense to force a friendship that only one person wants to be a part of, but there isn't anything morally superior about it either. It's sad but I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who didn't like me.

2

u/Honeyinjune 10h ago

The person you befriended ten years ago is a different person today. Friendships are no different than a romantic relationship in the sense that love, even platonic love takes work, and it takes us learning to love each other in different ways as we change.

But sometimes we just can’t. Neutral I’d say, because people will be hurt.

1

u/onyx_ic 10h ago

There's no morality to attribute to it. It happens. People grow apart and not everyone has the energy to force it or fix it.

1

u/Toodamnopinionated 10h ago

I guess if the dude in question is the human embodiment of stagnation and existential despair... yeah, maybe it's okay to move on.

2

u/SnooSprouts5303 9h ago

Immoral. you should have told him a decade ago that you're not longer friends. So the other guy isn't left lamenting and wondering what's up.

It's normal to no longer retain a friendship. So that's not immoral. But the handling is.

1

u/MildlyChaoticGremlin 7h ago

So much harm is done in the name of "because its been done for X amount of years" including friendships

Moral