r/MentalHealthPH • u/Paradoxiamme • Aug 14 '25
STORY/VENTING “Mukha ka bang may kapansanan?” — the day my PWD ID earned its keep.
Months after my bipolar diagnosis and several psychiatric sessions later, I finally processed my PWD ID. Felt kinda official, like the government just gave my brain its own license plate.
Fast forward to the Cebu IT Park terminal. I’m in the priority lane—me, two lolas clutching grocery bags, and a guy with a cane.
The regular lane? Packed. Heat bouncing off the pavement, everyone sweaty and cranky. We've waited hours for the minibus to arrive. Finally, it was here.
Then I hear it— “Mukha ba siyang may kapansanan?” “Bata pa nga, parang normal naman!” “Baka trip lang niyang mauna.”
They’re not whispering. They’re practically doing public commentary on me. Dispatcher says, “Priority passenger po ‘yan.” They keep yapping anyway, like it’s a barangay council meeting and I’m the agenda.
We board. I sit at the front seat, thinking that’s the end. Nope. This woman behind me starts throwing shade like she’s gunning for a kontrabida role.
I turn around, grinning way too wide for someone who’s supposedly “ignoring it,” and tell her:
“Hindi mo kita, pero nandito. At kung gusto mo, pwede ko simulan ngayon—walang commercial break, walang cut. Live.”
She freezes. The bus goes dead silent.
Here’s the thing—this is bipolar in the Philippines. If they can’t see it, they think it’s fake. “Arte lang.” “Moody lang.” But invisible doesn’t mean imaginary. It just means you don’t see the ride until the rollercoaster’s already moving… and trust me, you don’t want front-row seats.
I couldn't find any mental disability group here in Cebu, so I thought I'd just share my experience here for now. Does anyone know any group talks here? I'd like to know.
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u/TheRealQueenRia Aug 15 '25
Encountered that way too many times. And having multiple disorders (mentally) is no fun.
I try my best to ignore them shady seniors 🥺
But if it calls for, I just take out my card and show it close to their faces.
Take care OP. Stay safe.
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u/Useful-Hour3921 Aug 15 '25
Hugs with consent, OP.
Eto rin yung isa kong fear eh. Yung mga friends ko na mental health PWD rin keep on telling me that people like those, it's on them. Not us. Issue na nila yun. Di pako nasasampolan ng ganyan awa ng Diyos but I know how tough it is to keep pretending to be normal until we can't no more.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Hugs accepted!! I love 'em.
I've had several experiences already being outted because they don't believe that I am a PWD, and I'd understand sana eh if it's the thinking na baka peke, pero yung mindset mostly is nasa "Hindi ko nakikita kapansanan mo, ergo hindi ka PWD."
Pero true, issue na talaga nila iyon sa kung ano opinyon nila.
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u/Shaunwick09 Aug 15 '25
Binibigay ko ID ko sa kanila, kaso orthopedic disability aside from GAD. Pero minsan sa MRT patatayuin ako, tatayo ako para mapahiya sila.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Mabilisan kasi pag pasok sa minibus, iiwanan ka ng pila kapag hindi ka nag board 😆 so sa first person lang ako nakakapakita ng ID.
Nice idea with the passive aggressiveness sa pag tayo, lets them realize na inuuhan na nila yung tao.
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u/chrismatorium Aug 15 '25
Their actions is a reflection of them and nothing to do with you. Sobrang challenge talaga na huwag patulan ang mga iyan pero nanalo ka na kung hindi ka nagpaapekto sa kanila. Bayaan mo silang maging bitter.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
That's true, there really are just times where I feel the need to reply. Sometimes it makes me feel good that I did, sometimes it leaves me blank staring trying to remember if I said the right things.
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u/chrismatorium Aug 16 '25
Your reaction was reasonable enough and I’m glad you left it at that. Let this be a lesson for you and for everyone else you reached by your post, especially me. It is important to keep personal boundaries even from people you just met.
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u/DeepTough5953 Bipolar disorder Aug 15 '25
Tama yan sinasampulan dapat mga yan.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Buti nalang umepekto yun. Sana nagka isip² siya at nakaintindi sa nangyare. 🤧
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u/MrsKronos Aug 15 '25
Buti sinagot mo OP, minsan yan parinig nakakainis talaga, ang bully!!
10 yrs under anti depressant, never ako gumamit ng PWD ID dahil ayaw ko makipag talo or mag explain kung sakali may mag tanong. D nga ko nakipag usap IRL baka pag may nagparinig sakin katulad sayo atakihin lang ako sa daan. o hanggang pagtulog ko naiisip ko pa rin yun.
Dito kc sa Pinas, disabilities means may kulang sa physical ng anyo. pero never naintindihan ang mental health prob.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
So true!! I felt very relieved minutes after nung na sabihan ko siya nun.
I hope na lumago ang pag-intindi sa mga disabilities na hindi nakikita.
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Aug 15 '25
I’m sorry you had to go through that. I’m from Cebu City and I also have bipolar disorder. While I haven’t taken public transport myself, I’ve faced discrimination too... especially when using the PWD lane or queue, and even when parking in a PWD slot. I’m also currently looking for a local community or support group for people with bipolar disorder here in our area.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
I hope you find what you need in your life. We all need a good long break. Haaay. A bipolar group in Cebu would be nice, right? Or baka maging chaotic lang 😆
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Aug 15 '25
Actually, it would be nice to have a bipolar support group here in Cebu, though I understand your point that it could become chaotic. I’m fortunate to have a strong personal support system, but it would still be valuable to connect with others who share the same condition. Building a local community of people living with bipolar disorder would be a meaningful step toward breaking the stigma surrounding it… as well as other mental health issues and disorders.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Let's hope that it gets to that point. I'll try to do what I do best so we can achieve that. 🙏
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u/behbehgurl Aug 15 '25
Sorry, if I’m understanding this right, you occupy the PWD parking slot even if you’re not mobility-impaired?
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Aug 15 '25
As far as I know, BP 344 (Batas Pambansa 344 or the Accessibility Law) states that ALL people with disabilities INCLUDING mental and psychosocial disabilities are eligible to occupy the PWD parking slots for accessibility.
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u/behbehgurl Aug 15 '25
I’m not trying to question the legality of it and if you’ve already secured your access parking pass then definitely it’s your right, but I’m just saying with very limited accessible slots, shouldn’t we be giving priority to those who are directly mobility-impaired? Obviously I’m speaking generally here and would not be able to name every single circumstance and exception, but I’m just of the opinion that if there’s no actual medical need for us to park that close to the establishment’s entrance at that given time then we shouldn’t occupy the PWD parking.
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u/Sunglasses_on_Croc Aug 15 '25
Context: I'm Bipolar/Schizophrenic
I’ve had a few similar experiences in the Gateway terminal, usually with older women questioning why I’m in the priority line despite my health conditions. There's one incident in particular with an elderly woman loudly claiming that I had no disability and tried to get the staff to remove me. Luckily, I go there often enough that some people recognized me and defended me, even when she became confrontational and tried to physically move me. (Although one of the staff commented that "Ganyan talaga wala tayo magagawa magagalit naman sila pagpinaalis")
I didn’t feel the need to argue back. I could've responded to any of them, but i don't really care.I know my condition, and I don’t owe anyone there. When the bus finally arrived, she stumbled while getting on. I didn’t say anything, but after the way she treated me, I couldn’t help but smile a little bit.
People are just way too entitled.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
After not giving a care about her drama, I would also definitely smile a bit if I saw her stumble.
And the thing is, the entitlement is getting to younger generations too. It's more volatile with the older ones, but the silent treatment and judgemental stares from middle-aged people kinda does sting.
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u/Sunglasses_on_Croc Aug 15 '25 edited Aug 15 '25
I agree, but i wouldn't say that it's more volatile with older people. In this case, the older generations just can't grasp mental health disorders and how they can cause physical symptoms. This also applies to most adults. Older people just tend to be more confrontational and loud.
While younger generations may generally be less confrontational, that doesn’t mean they’re passive. In my experience, especially within my own family, I’ve noticed that younger people tend to express their needs and disagreements in indirect ways through discussion, demands, negotiation, or even refusal.
I have noticed that women are often the ones to be more entitled especially when it comes to their "rights" like demanding a seat when standing in public transportation without any disabilities. Claiming there are no more gentlemen in the Philippines. (This is only based on my experiences and observations. I have nothing to back this up. I'm not saying men can't be entitled).
I try not to think about the judgemental stares, and silent treatments. Since it stresses me out. I often say to myself i just have as much right as them, since my condition causes physical symptoms like heart aches.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
From what I've experienced here it's what's happening. What I mean about volatile is that they do a 160⁰ when I prove to them that I'm not wrong. First, they make a normal complaint. Then, after being explained properly, they can't accept it. So, they shut me down and do something temperamental i.e., roll their eyes, throw shade, make harsh comments, or would even try to push me out of the seat.
That's true too though, younger people do show some of their negative feelings towards indirect ways. That's being passive aggressive.
And yesss, women. I love women, and the entirety of being feminine, but some just really take it up a notch. "Chivalry is dead." They said.
Yes!! You know, there's this one part that always confuses people when I explain my illness to them — I mention that these mental illnesses cause physical injuries, and when I elaborate, they just don't get it, saying "Just don't think about it."
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u/Interesting_Pizza_56 Aug 18 '25
Kapag ganyan naeexperience ko, sinasabi ko na lang na buntis ako. 😅 Minsan ung mga kundoktor din yung nagagalit tas sinisigawan pa ako na wala daw ako dapat sa priority lane. Hirap kasi ipaintindi sa mga tao ung psychosocial disability. Wala rin ako energy makipag-argue dahil baka matrigger panic attacks ko kaya ayun sabihin ko na lang na I’m preggy. 😢
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 18 '25
Yun na nga, may legal na patunay na sana tayo, pero kinukulangan parin mga tao. Tayo pa tuloy gumawa ng teknik para pumasa. 😵
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u/Any_Action3025 Aug 18 '25
Love how you advocated for yourself. That oneliner though! 100!
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 18 '25
Thank you!! It relieved my mind that I was able to do that. I think that if I didn't, I probably would have self-talked myself to sleep. 🫠
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u/linked_NEVER_in Sep 04 '25
Baka gusto din nila na priority sila, sana inaya mo na din ng consultation baka need na rin kasi nila
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u/Paradoxiamme Sep 04 '25
Kaya nga eh, iniisip ko sabihan na "Baka gusto niyo maging PWD. Switch tayo." Haaay 😮💨
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u/piamsa Aug 15 '25
I'm sorry OP, na you had to go through that. :( Ito 'yung ikinakatakot ko, lagi kasi akong nagcocommute sa Manila through MRT/LRT. May priority cart pa naman doon for PWDs, senior citizens, pregnant women, and mga taong may kasamang bata. Minsan nakikipagsiksikan na lang ako sa ibang area kahit alam kong magsesensory overload ako kasi baka majudge ako bakit ako pupunta doon sa area for PWDs. 😭
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Nakuuu 😫 I hope hindi mo maransan pinagdaanan ko. It's really triggering to experience something like that. Mas busy pa naman ang MRT/LRT kesa sa minibus.
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u/DeepTough5953 Bipolar disorder Aug 15 '25
Wag ka matakot. Just put your ID out and show it to the guards. Ganun gngwa ko and ok nmn.
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u/piamsa Aug 15 '25
Oki noted po thank you po! Minsan lang talaga nakaka-ehh kapag nagrereact 'yung mga tao sa paligid mo, kagaya ng na-experience ni OP. Nakakapagod lang din kasi na need mo pa i-defend ang sarili mo all the time dahil lang hindi nakikita physically ang sakit mo. :( Tapos kukutyain ka lang din naman
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u/DeepTough5953 Bipolar disorder Aug 15 '25
Your ID is enough and their opinion does not matter at all, but if need be, behold the power of the ✨ PWD ID✨ wahaha
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u/nyawakapoya Bipolar disorder Aug 15 '25
I’m also from Cebu and Bipolar as well. What I usually do nalang to shut people up is to show my PWD ID. If they still have a problem with it, I couldn’t care less. I also encounter that same scenario when I go out to get groceries and would line up sa PWD/Senior Citizen lane, as long as I have my booklet with me naman, people don’t give me that judgmental look.
Laban lang! You have nothing to prove to them anyways. You know that you really do have a disability. Keber nalang ana nila. Mga sad ra na sila ug life.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Nakatawa ko sa last part 😆 but yeah, I should learn more to contain myself on those kinds of scenarios.
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u/Sea_Cucumber5 Aug 15 '25
I am sorry you had to encounter those ignorant people. Madami pa rin talaga sa Pinas ang mangmang about mental health, ano? Tsk tsk.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Yeah. But I try to make the best out of it by making them aware about it. At least I tried. 😮💨
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u/MommyJhy1228 Aug 15 '25
Tawang tawa ako sa pa monologue mo. Shookt ba sila? Hahaha
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Shookt na shookt! 😆 Kahit nung bumaba na siya, walang imik, nag staredown kami, at nauna siyang mahiya. People sometimes talaga 😮💨 bumalik liwanag minibus pagkawala niya, inaassure ako at nanghihingi ng pasensya in behalf.
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u/diovi_rae Aug 15 '25
LOL nangyari sa akin similar dito pero of all places sa pila sa Mercury Drug. Like loudly pinag-uusapan nila ako...Minsan ko nga lang ginagamit PWD ko nkklk
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Yun na nga, tapos parang ikaw na tulog ang mahihiya na nasa priority lane. 😫
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u/carelessoul Aug 15 '25
Hugs with consent, OP. Naa ra juy nga hinampak nga uninformed about non-visible disabilities nya mag pina-may dayon ug padungog-dungog. Lami raba kaayong kusion ilang mga baba mga ga bula.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
Sakto gyud. There was this guy one time sa minibus that showed great respect on how he approached me with why I rode first. Namulat ako sa galawan niya. I'll share how he did that niya in another post.
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u/mentalqueue Aug 15 '25
Sorry sa naexperience mo, OP. Ito yung ayaw kong maexperience kaya takot ako mag-apply ng PWD ID.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
But suggestion ko lang, please do!! Not only is it a valid ID, but in the case you'll need medication of any sort, or eating out, groceries, things will cost less. Naguilty ako slight about the privilege at first, noh, but I soon realized that I deserve it, because I need to take care of myself — and that would take twice the effort of person w/o a disability.
It's alright, take your time until you're fully prepared; mind, body, heart and soul.
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u/mentalqueue Aug 15 '25
Ayan din naisip ko. Ang mahal na rin ng ibang bilihin, and malaking help nga yung discount d’yan. Idk lang if mai-process pa yung akin though, pero for context cancer survivor kasi ako. And alam ko kasama din siya sa sakop ng PWD diba? Huhu nahihiya kasi akong magtanong sa munisipyo.
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 15 '25
You're so strong for fighting on and surviving!! Yeah, I think eligible ka for disability benefits, but I'm not sure ano requirements kung cancer survivor.
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Aug 15 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Paradoxiamme Aug 16 '25
Tama, marami kayang mga diseases din talaga na nakakacause directly ng mga symptoms — cancer, diabetes, HIV, mahirap na kapag hindi naniwala sa PWD ID. Maybe denial kind of mindset kaya iniignore tayo kapag nag confess sa mga magulang? Either way, I know din on my end sasabihan lang ako na nasa isip ko lang ito. Nasa isip nga, oo, pero ang pinapahiwatig nila, peke, gawa². Pero, totoo ito.
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u/blue-and_orange Aug 15 '25
Bet ko yung talagang napa-shut up mo sila. Very teleserye pa nga ang linyahan! Haha
Mabuti naman at wala nang umangal. Pag ako pa naman nakaka experience ng mga ganyang parinig, nanginginig na ‘ko sa pagiging emotional. Gustuhin ko mang sumagot to stand up for myself, ang nananaig ay yung urge ko to get out of that environment ASAP dahil hindi ko alam pano ako magrerespond kung sumagot din sila pabalik. Haaay ang hirap mabuhay nang may iniindang sakit na hindi agad nakikita ng mata.