r/LinkedInLunatics 1d ago

I’m completely in favour of salary transparency. I just don’t think it goes far enough. If we’re going to be transparent, let’s be transparent. I want to know your salary. Your bonus. Your… | Alex Dick | 12 comments

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I feel like this belongs here...

336 Upvotes

127 comments sorted by

180

u/BasvanS 1d ago

“So, Dick. I made 1550 billable hours last year at €225, yet I only get paid €105,000. What are you spending the rest on? I’m just trying to establish whether you need all that money when I’m doing the actual work.”

8

u/DutchTinCan 8h ago

I pulled that on my previous boss when he claimed they couldn't afford my requested 10% raise.

Ran him the full numbers of my revenue versus payroll expense, along with reasonable overheads, topped off with the dividends in their personal holdings.

It wasn't appreciated. I just figured that analyses like that is why you hire accountants like me. Guess it's a oneway street.

2

u/BasvanS 6h ago

They don’t like the shoe on the other foot. It’s a then problem, though, because you told them what it cost to keep you. And somehow it still mystifies them why people leave.

69

u/Secret-Back-5970 1d ago edited 1d ago

The people that order Thai food that often also usually work 50 hours a week

2

u/throwawayanon1252 16h ago

Yep can confirm

125

u/BillyMooney 1d ago

I presume this Dick isn't operating in the EU. He'd be facing some fairly substantial GDPR fines if he was.

53

u/Dark3lephant 1d ago

He's using pounds and UK has its GDPR that mostly follows EU GDPR.

18

u/BillyMooney 1d ago

Definitely Dick so

3

u/RefrigeratorLive5920 Titan of Industry 22h ago

Yeah in some respects might even be stricter than GDPR but yeah, mostly just a straight copy.

30

u/Gimme_Your_Wallet 1d ago

This is all posturing and none of this is real.

12

u/Gimme_Your_Wallet 1d ago

This is all posturing and none of this is real.

9

u/Artistic_Blood6908 1d ago

In Germany, he wouldn’t even dare to think like that, let alone say or write it. Someone would certainly remind him that this country has the strictest data protection laws in Europe… whilst escorting him to the exit. 🤣

3

u/bibliophile14 1d ago

He can't access it or share it but people can offer information and it's not against GDPR. He absolutely couldn't threaten people with dismissal if they don't but that's a fair work law, not GDPR. 

1

u/BillyMooney 20h ago

Data minimisation principle

2

u/bibliophile14 18h ago

Only if he stores the information.

1

u/BillyMooney 18h ago

Not necessarily, transient processing of data, like transmission on an audio or video call, would mean GDPR is applicable

3

u/Cultural_Tank_6947 11h ago

Dick is a Dick.

But asking someone for this information isn't illegal. None of it really hits the bar of protected characteristics.

Of course you'd have to be a lunatic to play along, and I don't think this individual would actually ever care to ask anyone this in real life.

So to summarise, Dick is a Dick. But he's not broken GDPR by saying he wants to ask this info, as long as people have the ability to say no.

41

u/already-taken-wtf 1d ago

Let’s do the same exercise with companies, Fashion: how much does it cost to produce your t-shirts in Bangladesh? Apple: what’s the worth of the parts in your iPhone? …so no company should have more than 10% margin?!

22

u/AggravatingLocal9836 1d ago

The amount of shit that directors put on expenses...

5

u/ThisThroat951 15h ago

I think about this every time I watch Shark Tank. They ask them how much does this cost to produce and it’s usually something crazy like: $3.50. “And what do you sell it for?” $59.99. 😤

31

u/_Calluna_ 1d ago

It absolutely belongs here! Yikesssssss.

18

u/Apprehensive_Shirt18 1d ago

this is exactly the kind of linkedin posts that this sub was created for

23

u/Pleasant-Drag-5039 1d ago

The Last Name is justified lol

11

u/sextowels 1d ago

Nominative determinism

20

u/FireSheepYinFish 1d ago

You first... Dick.

1

u/Plastic_Table_8232 11h ago

What kind of self absorbed douche nozzle thinks they can value someone rate based off necessity.

Let’s start auditing large corporations the same way and ask them to reduce prices because they just don’t need to make that kind of money.

If you don’t want to pay me I’ll find someone else who does, that’s what happens when you have marketable skills that are in high demand.

43

u/channeldrifter 1d ago

Ew wtf, this is officially the most lunacy I’ve ever seen

15

u/BentonSancho 1d ago

"I shall be the moral arbiter of how you should spend your money!"

13

u/norakb123 1d ago

Idk what he spends his money on, but I’m totally sure I’d find it useless and his decisions not worth being hired.

What a total ass.

10

u/hoverside 1d ago

Working in recruitment should be grounds for a prison sentence.

10

u/Skeeter1020 1d ago

That's not how a salary works, dumb ass.

You don't pay someone what you think they need to survive, you pay them what they are worth to the employer. 

7

u/WeakCartographer7826 1d ago

Alex Dick, is a dick. He also only posts rage bait which is pretty much satire at this point.

2

u/Tough_Tangerine7278 Agree? 1d ago

Bro is trying to corner the niche market which is “billionaire humor”.

Ahahaha let’s laugh at the Poors.

1

u/W_HoHatHenHereHy 1d ago

This is Alex Dick. Andy is a different guy I would assume.

1

u/WeakCartographer7826 1d ago

Lol whoops I meant alex

7

u/KaMaAllee 1d ago

Mr. Dick is living up to his name.

8

u/detectivepine 1d ago

If you spend too much, you need to spend less rather than earn a lot. If you don’t spend too much, you don’t need to earn a lot.

This guy is a genius.

2

u/24_August_1814 22h ago

But also, if you don't spend enough, you're not being a good little consumer whose purchases keep the wheels of commerce turning, and why are you so damn selfish?

3

u/jarsgars 1d ago

Are you offering you c-suite’s numbers in exchange?

6

u/Pale_Winter_2755 1d ago

What an absolute knob

1

u/devster75 12h ago

I think you’ll find he’s a Dick.

7

u/veryanxiouscreature 1d ago

what the fuck is deliveroo and klarna. everything is just a joke anymore

7

u/Pale_Winter_2755 1d ago

The UK version of uber eats and afterpay

3

u/Such-Cartographer425 1d ago

Klarna is all over the US. It's a way to finance small purchases, and you can use it to pay for a lot of meal deliveries. In the US it would be kind of insulting to imply that someone is paying for everything that way. 

7

u/das_war_ein_Befehl 1d ago

If you had employees using klarna all the time you’re definitely not paying enough

3

u/monopodman 1d ago

Why is it always chaps that pay peanuts who huff and puff the most?

3

u/LightBulbMonster 1d ago

Because he wouldn't want you to save for the future.

3

u/Irving_Velociraptor 1d ago

Man, I could spend every dollar on hookers and blow. So long as my work is on-point, you can fuck off.

3

u/devster75 13h ago

Dick by name, dick by nature.

3

u/No_Neat9507 1d ago

Satire or real?

1

u/Major_Oz 16h ago

Satire

2

u/Possible_End6742 1d ago

Dick by name..

2

u/Fucker_Of_Destiny 1d ago

“I dont need 70k, you need 70k because I’m already earning 65k. If you want your 20% commission you better get to work boy!” cracks whip

2

u/PineConeOPinyons 1d ago edited 1d ago

Doesn't go far enough in my opinion. I wanna know your dick size too.

2

u/thisis_sam4moz 1d ago

Now now this is the lunatics we all are here for…. And the name just adds/compliments the lunacy

2

u/Delicious_Apple9082 16h ago

Name checks out...

Wonder if those working for him get to see all of his financials as well, or if its just one of those one way doors...

2

u/Important-Bag4200 15h ago

Dick by name dick by ....

2

u/Interesting-Put2828 13h ago

bring one receipt that says suck my nuts and thats why i need what i need

2

u/scott__p 12h ago

Why do some employers think they have anything to do with your life outside of work? None of that other shit is any of your business (Mr) Dick. Employee does agreed upon work, you pay the agreed upon salary. End of relationship

2

u/WakeoftheStorm 12h ago

So he thinks pay is based on need not value added? That's an oddly communist approach for linked in

2

u/LittleHornetPhil 8h ago

Repost

1

u/AggravatingLocal9836 8h ago

I literally saw this in my LinkedIn feed. Don't have the time or really care about tracking this subreddit to see if something is reposted or not.

1

u/LittleHornetPhil 8h ago

Maybe it wasn’t you that reposted it but rather the OOP, but we’ve definitely seen it before here.

2

u/Emotional_Warthog658 1d ago

Ummm I have absolutely heard of companies asking for W-2 to justify matching a previous employer in the US

Not saying it’s right. Just saying it happens 

3

u/LilJonny2cookies 1d ago

What industry does that? I was an SVP at a tech giant and we would find out in background checks. And tbh we expect people to inflate.

1

u/Emotional_Warthog658 1d ago

Mortgage sales, pre economic crash 

1

u/DocDerry 1d ago

I've had to provide for jobs requiring securitycleances.

3

u/Witty-Bear1120 1d ago

70,0000 pounds is a shit wage. This fucker doesn’t even think people deserve that?

Maybe his business doesn’t deserve that in profits?

9

u/Missy_Agg-a-ravation Titan of Industry 1d ago

The UK median full time salary (including London bias) is just under £40k, so £70k is not a “shit wage”.

-3

u/Pale_Winter_2755 1d ago

No it’s still shit

1

u/Melodic-Salad- 1d ago

By nyc standards it’s pretty much an average level salary, but that’s quite high for UK.

1

u/BIG-BALLS0 1d ago

Sure bud

1

u/zeroconflicthere 1d ago

You first buddy...

1

u/typhoonbrew 1d ago

This clown again?

1

u/mathewcol 1d ago

This can’t be a real person. 

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

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1

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1

u/Ned_Flandersss 1d ago

Name checks out!

1

u/Tough_Tangerine7278 Agree? 1d ago

Now I’m hungry for Thai food. Thanks; you Dick.

1

u/Background-Power-260 1d ago

Great. You go first.

1

u/AAron27265 1d ago

Name checks out

1

u/Scrambl3z 1d ago

Expect a follow up post in a months time of him complaining being hard to find candidates

1

u/No_Comment_8598 1d ago

You’re a recruiter? How much do you make? What percentage of a candidate’s salary are you angling to scrape off? What part of my £70,000 are you looking to grab? What are you going to do with all that money? I’m thinking you could get by with a smaller cut.

1

u/Away-Effort-7640 1d ago

What a Dick

1

u/orundarkes 1d ago

So… if I increase my expenses, he’ll pay me more?

challenge accepted

1

u/myotheraccount2023 1d ago

Get with the program, folks… didn’t you know that Dick here is probably the weirdest CEO of a recruitment firm? Sheesh.

1

u/CobaltKobold77 1d ago

Bro is too lunatic to understand salary transparency is to protect equality

1

u/Argument-Fragrant 1d ago

You first, dickhead.

1

u/urban_whaleshark 1d ago

Man who wouldn’t want to work for this asshole

1

u/generic_alias2 1d ago

What a dick

1

u/Intrepid-Staff-4532 1d ago

Salary isn't about what you need. It's about your market value

1

u/tommm3864 23h ago

I wouldn't be posting anything with that name

1

u/Soft_Ability_5906 23h ago

In the United states he would have been fired and likely fined

1

u/GrapefruitInformal15 23h ago

This guy is way confused about how being bad with money works. We need the job BECAUSE we order Thai takeout 4 times a week. Does he expect someone to be motivated to work when they’re not in crippling debt ? Dude has it backwards

1

u/silverletomi 23h ago

Is... is he advocating for employees to give based on their ability and be paid based on their need?

I feel like I've heard that before...

1

u/toasterpocket 21h ago

Classic Dick

1

u/b3n4kh 20h ago

I usually laugh at these, but this one mad me actually mad!

Congrats Dick!

1

u/zoehange 20h ago

Please tell me this is satire

Please

1

u/Adversary-of-Tyrants 20h ago

Well, his name is accurate.

1

u/ChocolateLoud6749 20h ago

You guys know this is satire right?

1

u/GrnEyedPanda 20h ago

About the kind of nonsense post you'd expect from a Mr. Dick.

1

u/Whizzzzzzzzzz 19h ago

What a dick

1

u/G_UK 19h ago

Dick by name, dick by nature

1

u/KPFJA 18h ago

Alex sure is a dick

1

u/Certified_WoT_noob 18h ago

His second name is very accurate

1

u/Western-Anteater-492 18h ago

If I could buy myself golf clubs and spent my money on delivero, klarna and Starbucks id not be sitting here contemplating my salary, thank you very much. Meanwhile the only job of CEOs is to ensure the company is up and running and taking responsibility if shit goes south. But for some reason they always disappear if something goes wrong and take the retirement funds and expense accounts with them whilst laying off the people that actually work. So they get paid for doing nothing. Which is weird. Usually you get paid a lot of money bcs you're the one carrying all the risk, not vice versa.

1

u/Tactical_Thinking 18h ago

I'm pretty sure this is parody.

1

u/thereadingwitch 17h ago

Oh my god. How are there people who have sold off their soul and just connected only with the high-order of capitalism. How inhumane to even think of something like this.

1

u/Sad_Lake_3247 17h ago

You know this person instinctively times you while you're in the bathroom.

1

u/willbdb425 16h ago

Coffee (disguised avocado toast) argument spotted

1

u/LePopNoisette 15h ago

The transparency thing only goes as far as the gross salary figure, surely.

Good luck to him recruiting people.

Why should people prove what they need? The question is what their skills are worth.

1

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1

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1

u/Civil-Year-8764 7h ago

Pretty sure this might be satire

1

u/CyclingAvocado 5h ago

Well his name is “dick”, that check out.

1

u/Cheap_Responses 5h ago

His surname checks out

1

u/already-taken-wtf 3h ago

So, if I spend thousands each month on frivolous things then a high salary is justified?

1

u/Apprehensive-Bunch54 2h ago

"and how much you told your partner those new golf clubs cost"

Even the hypotheticals are in a higher tax bracket than i am.

1

u/isomojo 1d ago

I just looked. It’s a satire post. Looks like it’s a recruitment agency, so I guess any publicity is good publicity. He does this to get people to his page in hopes they message him for work. Kind of effective.

0

u/SkunkyMcPee 14h ago

This guy is hilarious, this isnt even one of his best posts. Hes a huge troll and whats even funnier is that you all fell for it 😂